42. The Ladder Part 2

The knocking went on for a long time before Lu Zhengming finally turned on the bedside lamp and glanced at his phone. Two-thirty in the morning.

Just before waking, he had been dreaming that his body and Yin Yan’s were fused together, painting the same canvas. It was a dream he hadn’t wanted to leave, and the disruption filled him with fury. He opened the door with clenched fists, seething.

Under the dim hallway light, a kiss tinged with the chill of night landed on his lips, instantly dousing the fire.

He didn’t need to see clearly to know who it was. But even so, the kiss still came as a surprise. He lingered in it for a moment before pulling back slightly. “That fast? I thought you’d come in a few days…”

Yin Yan locked the door behind him and grabbed him by the neck, sealing his mouth with another kiss. Lu Zhengming stopped questioning it, and the two of them tumbled onto the bed together. Desire, still simmering in his body, flared back up before he had time to decide whether he was still dreaming or if the dream had come true. His flesh responded faster than his thoughts.

They hadn’t touched in a long time. Lu Zhengming’s body trembled from hunger, and Yin Yan seemed even more starved than he was. Those kisses were so deep they bordered on biting. Teeth scraped across his skin, sharp enough to sting, but the pain only amplified the pleasure. Before they even got to the main event, Lu Zhengming was already moaning.

What he loved most wasn’t the touch. It was the look in Yin Yan’s eyes. That heated, unblinking gaze lit a fire in his chest. Whenever he was seen like that, his heart would pound so hard it hurt.

Yin Yan toyed with his chest muscles, kneading and shaping them with rough hands. The pressure left Lu Zhengming’s chest flushed red, burning and sensitive. He tilted his head back in anticipation, ready for the next kiss.

But Yin Yan didn’t kiss him. He braced himself above him, panting, his eyes dark and unreadable.

Lu Zhengming’s skin, left untouched, burned with frustration. He waited, restless, then finally sat up and pressed his mouth to Yin Yan’s on his own. He had never been shy in bed. He followed desire wherever it led, always honest, always eager.

And that honesty tore Yin Yan up inside. Lust churned hot in his body, but jealousy gnawed at his soul. He loved Lu Zhengming’s straightforwardness, sometimes more than he was willing to admit. It reached a place inside him he didn’t want to look at. Night after night, he had used fantasies of Lu Zhengming to ward off the emptiness.

But he saw it as a sin. A distraction from the higher purpose he had built his life around. It dulled his will, made him weak, indulgent, addicted to base pleasure. Every moment of enjoyment had to be repaid with equal pain, punishment for his decay. Over time, he had learned to crawl under this weight. He no longer knew what simple joy felt like.

Lu Zhengming had barged in like a wrecking ball, shattering his chains, forcing pleasure into him like a poison. He never felt shame. Never apologized. He was pure, unashamed, radiant with joy, so radiant it made people envy him.

Logic told Yin Yan to reject this, to pin the blame on Lu Zhengming. But his emotions always betrayed him, pushing him to give in, then leaving him to deal with the guilt. Lu Zhengming’s temptation was careless, even wanton. He should have despised it.

But in reality, he indulged. And he enjoyed it.

While his mind flailed, his body had already entangled itself with Lu Zhengming’s. Their bare skin pressed together, and the heat from Lu Zhengming’s body began melting everything. His resistance, his guilt, his inner conflict…

Suddenly, he pushed Lu Zhengming away.

“Hmm?” Lu Zhengming blinked at him, dazed. “What’s wrong…”

Yin Yan steadied his breath and gave a smile Lu Zhengming had no defense against. “I want to try something different.”

“Sure… what do you want to do?” Lu Zhengming leaned in to kiss him again. After a moment, he paused. “Wait—don’t tell me you’re thinking about spanking me again?”

Yin Yan shook his head and kissed away the tension in his voice. “You’ll like it. All you have to do is enjoy it.”

Lu Zhengming smiled and lay back without hesitation, arms folded behind his head, eyes closing in ease.

Yin Yan placed a hand firmly on his chest. “Just one rule. Don’t move.”

“No problem.”

Lu Zhengming stretched out a little more, completely unguarded. His openness and trust stirred that familiar jealousy in Yin Yan all over again.

He raised his hand and gently traced his fingertips across Lu Zhengming’s skin. The flushed heat from earlier hadn’t faded, and Lu trembled, sucking in a breath and instinctively arching his chest. Yin Yan stopped immediately and tapped a knuckle against his sternum.

“Don’t move.”

“Mm…”

Yin Yan resumed his touch. Lu Zhengming obeyed, letting himself be handled, a quiet anticipation in his expression, even though the teasing pace was driving him mad. Yin Yan traced lazy circles across his chest, inching closer to one nipple, already stiff and flushed with a hungry red.

Naked and exposed, Lu Zhengming’s desire began to swell, rising, nowhere to hide. When Yin Yan’s fingers hovered just millimeters above him, he gasped out loud. Those fingers, long and strong, yet soft at the pads, reminded him of every maddening, electric stroke he had felt before. He swallowed hard.

Yin Yan watched him carefully, every reaction playing out under his control. With each subtle shift of his fingers, Lu Zhengming’s body gave a faint tremor. He had meant to simply touch him, expecting that familiar, hoarse moan of pleasure from Lu’s throat. But just as his fingers landed, he changed his mind. Curling his hand slightly, he flicked him. Not too hard, but just enough.

Lu Zhengming let out a stifled grunt, body jerking up involuntarily.

“That hurt… I thought you said it’d feel good?” he muttered, a little annoyed.

“Sorry.” Yin Yan pressed a finger to his lips, smiling without the slightest trace of remorse.

Then he lowered his head and took the nipple into his mouth, the same one he had just flicked. He sucked gently, drawing wet, slow circles with his tongue. Lu Zhengming’s breathing settled into a deep rhythm again, this time breaking into gasps.

Yin Yan paused and licked his lips, savoring the haze in Lu Zhengming’s eyes. Then he turned to the other side, kneading it slowly until it was swollen and flushed just the same. Lu responded beautifully, sighs slipping out of him, his chest rising and falling, his biceps tightening with every shudder, but he didn’t move.

His compliance gave Yin Yan a strange feeling. A quiet, consuming sense of power. He felt split down the middle. Half still within himself, half transposed into Lu Zhengming’s body, there to enjoy the pleasure and debauchery on his behalf, and also to carry the guilt and the shame.

To slip between roles took no more than a breath. Yin Yan was hard again, fully aroused, but he hid it, sealed every crack, letting nothing show.

“Very good,” he said, still working his fingers over that flushed skin, his voice soft with approval.

Lu Zhengming seemed to take that to heart. As if trying to do even better, he muffled his moans deep in his throat, not letting them escape.

That strong, sculpted body trembled under just a few fingers, submitting not only to touch but also to voice. He endured it all, restrained and obedient. Yin Yan whispered encouragement in a soft, intoxicating voice, his hands wandering across the flesh he had long been obsessed with.

“Good… Zhengming… you’re doing so well…”

Since that night, since the first time he saw Lu Zhengming completely naked, he had become irreplaceable in Yin Yan’s sexual fantasies. And now, he was lying right here in front of him, compliant, fully surrendered to his control. Once again, Yin Yan confirmed what he had always wanted to believe: Lu Zhengming belonged to him. That surge of control lit up something strange and hot inside him. It wasn’t sexual, exactly. It crawled up into his lungs, left his chest itching, his breath growing heavy.

Lu Zhengming was aroused too. He had imagined countless scenarios of Yin Yan taking the lead, demanding his body, but none had matched this. He wasn’t a born masochist, but yielding to Yin Yan, responding to his commands, filled him with a different kind of pleasure. One that, like Yin Yan’s, had nothing to do with sex. He knew now that even off the bed, he would still be willing to give more to Yin Yan. It made him happy. Just like the big dog he had loved in childhood, the one that had always made him happy. He believed the dog had been happy too.

“Yin Yan… I want…”

His voice trembled. He shifted his painfully hard cock against the back of Yin Yan’s hand, which was lingering around his lower belly, fingers idly brushing the curls at his groin. That patch was already damp with the fluid he had leaked, the hair matted and sticking to his skin.

“Do you want to do it yourself… or do you want me to?”

Yin Yan pulled his hand away, watching as Lu Zhengming forced himself to lie back down and grit out a hoarse “I want you.” He reached down again, wrapping his fingers around him like a reward. The moment his palm touched his cock, he could feel the burning heat radiating off it.

Lu Zhengming had never felt this before, his body so close to release from nothing more than a touch. Yin Yan barely stroked him before moving his hand back up, once again teasing his nipples. They were now a deep, angry red, flushed all the way around the areola. Lu Zhengming glanced down and felt his whole face go hot. He had never been played with like this. It was humiliating.

And yet the shame only made his body more reactive. Every flushed patch on his skin now felt the same aching buzz as his chest. He moaned loudly, his voice growing ragged as the desire twisted inside him, looking for a place to escape.

Yin Yan was more than pleased. He bent down for a quick kiss, and when he pulled away, Lu Zhengming’s tongue chased after him, trailing a line of spit between them.

His lips were slick, eyes glistening. There was a rare vulnerability in him, just enough to drive Yin Yan mad. His desire flared both physically and psychologically, a wildfire burning at every edge.

He stared deep into Lu Zhengming’s eyes, and his fingers moved fast and rough, kneading with pressure. His mind was full of unspeakable words. Filthy, ruinous things he could say aloud and watch Lu Zhengming fall apart under the weight of every one. But when he opened his mouth, all that came out was a calm, measured—

“Good.”

Lu Zhengming’s eyes grew increasingly glazed. A flush spread across his chest and neck, and his moans climbed higher and higher. Even though it was his upper body being teased, it was his lower half that began to tremble. The part of him that had been briefly touched, then neglected, was now twitching in steady pulses, swollen to its limit. The slightest touch would make it erupt.

“Yin Yan… Yin Yan… I can’t take it…”

He clutched the bedsheets, voice fluttering out between trembling lips, and in Yin Yan’s ears, it became the purest pleasure of domination. He lowered his head and kissed him. His hand slid down along Lu Zhengming’s side, and the moment it reached his lower body, those long legs began to jerk uncontrollably.

Lu Zhengming shuddered violently, but only came halfway. His neglected cock bobbed in the air, still achingly erect, demanding attention.

“You want…”

“Yes…”

The answer came before Yin Yan could even finish the question. After a kiss to his chest, he reached down again and gave him the relief he craved. Lu Zhengming’s half-faded climax was quickly reignited, and in no time, he was hard again.

He looked at Yin Yan with a pleading expression. The teasing was driving him mad. He wanted to come, properly. He needed it.

Yin Yan guided his arms down from behind his head, adjusting his posture to something more relaxed.

“This time, you can move.”

He smeared the semen pooled on Lu Zhengming’s abdomen across his cock, stroking him slowly. The slick sound between them was obscene, and the air carried the raw scent of lust. Lu Zhengming groaned low in his throat, hips instinctively rising to thrust into the tunnel formed by Yin Yan’s fingers. Yin Yan followed his rhythm, the other hand caressing his body. He let it go on just long enough for Lu Zhengming’s moans to grow louder, his breathing ragged, then stopped abruptly with a low chuckle.

“But unless I say so, you’re not allowed to come.”

“Why?”

Lu Zhengming growled in frustration. The next second, his cock was flicked, and his arousal instantly dulled. Anger flashed across his face, paired with an unbearable tension, but under Yin Yan’s calm, unreadable gaze, he had nothing to say, because he was the one who had willingly given himself up.

A man in his thirties, looking up with that aggrieved expression, suddenly resembled a boy half his age. It was the first time Yin Yan ever thought to describe Lu Zhengming with words like “adorable.” That look of helplessness gave him a wave of satisfaction that almost made him laugh. But his face betrayed nothing. He remained composed, with just the faintest trace of amusement.

“Have you figured it out?”

Lu Zhengming sighed inwardly and nodded. “I get it.”

Yin Yan gave him the same kind smile he wore in class and wrapped his hand around him again, starting to move. Before long, Lu Zhengming’s gaze had gone hazy, his long lashes casting deep shadows over half-lidded eyes. The darkness made his gaze look even deeper, more intense, and it became one of the sexiest moments Yin Yan had ever seen.

He loved Lu Zhengming’s voice too. Low and clean, rough enough to be masculine, but never crude. Like his eyes, it hit the perfect note. His body was sculpted like a statue. That day a year ago, when Yin Yan had been tied to his easel watching him paint shirtless, the image had seared itself into his mind like a real-life David.

And now, Michelangelo came to mind again, but this time, not the heroic David, but the Slave. Bound. Offered up.

Yin Yan’s breathing grew heavier, tinged now with raw arousal. His hands moved more lewdly, drawing out every reaction. Lu Zhengming’s eyes, voice, and body had become his medium. Every response was a new stroke, a new form rising from his hand.

What surged in his chest wasn’t just lust or the hunger to dominate. Something fuller was filling his heart, something light and buoyant, lifting him higher with every breath. It was a feeling he knew well yet always refused to name. It was supposed to be shameful, sinful, a burden pulling him away from his upward path, but inside it, he felt as though he were already at the summit, filled with brightness and air and freedom.

And Lu Zhengming was right beside him. In this thin, freezing air, he was the one giving him warmth and oxygen, endlessly, without holding back.

This beautiful, corrupting illusion…

Yin Yan removed the last piece of his clothing, pulled out the plug he had worn the whole way there, and in Lu Zhengming’s stunned gaze, straddled him.