IOB Ch 15

The man asked to be called Myeong. Myeong had recently quit his job at a factory and had holed himself up in a tiny, one-room apartment, refusing to come out.

I went directly to the place where Myeong lived. It was a good five-hour drive from Seoul. Taking an entire day off in the midst of busy company work wasn’t easy, but meeting Myeong was that urgent. After all, he was someone who knew about Woo Seonrim’s past.

“It’s been twelve years since Woo Seonrim’s trail went cold. But about ten years ago, Won Jinmyeong saw Woo Seonrim in Korea. He was acquainted with Woo Seonrim’s biological mother.”

Her name was Kim Hwiseon. A woman currently listed as deceased.

I mulled over the words Choi Geonyeong had told me as I entered the building where Myeong lived. It was a single-room apartment, illegally rented out in the basement of a commercial building. That was Myeong’s sanctuary.

I couldn’t help but wonder what kind of person the landlord was, renting out a place like this for monthly rent—the building was utterly dilapidated. The stench of long-neglected food waste filled the staircase, and the smell of urine leaked from the shared bathroom on the second floor.

Thud, thud. I descended to the basement and knocked on the old iron door with my fist.

“Is Mr. Won Jinmyeong home?”

I even knocked politely, but there was no response from inside.

Damn it, what kind of riches or glory was I chasing to come all the way to this backwater and go through this hassle… But it was I who had dissuaded Choi Geonyeong from dragging Myeong to Seoul. Who could I blame? I had chosen to come here myself to see Myeong and his living conditions with my own eyes.

“Mr. Won Jinmyeong.”

I knocked on the door again and waited for about a minute. Still no answer. I knew it would come to this. In the end, I had no choice but to resort to rough methods. I glanced up the staircase and signaled to one of the hired hands waiting above.

I left the heavy lifting to the big guys and stepped back leisurely to wait. The sound of the door handle being forcefully broken followed.

“Good work. Stay on standby until I call you.”

The forcibly opened door was left in tatters. Well, it didn’t matter much since Myeong would be leaving this place today anyway.

I entered the house alone. The tiny, hole-like room didn’t require any effort to survey; everything was visible at a glance. The interior was dim. Being a semi-basement, the window was covered with something like aluminum foil.

When Choi Geonyeong first tracked down Myeong’s residence, he mentioned they had broken the window. It seemed Myeong had haphazardly covered it afterward. Even when thugs broke into his home, he didn’t report it or try to escape, treating it as if nothing had happened.

Myeong was curled up on a thin, worn-out blanket, looking up at me. He showed no signs of being shaken. I maintained the most polite expression I could and spoke. I had no particular desire to handle him roughly.

“I called, but there was no answer.”

“…”

“Shall we have a little talk?”

There was no life in Myeong’s eyes. He didn’t seem like a living person. The musty smell filling the room felt almost like the stench of a rotting corpse.

To meet Myeong’s eye level, I slowly crouched down.

“A few days ago, my hyung came by, didn’t he?”

“…”

“You said you knew Ms. Kim Hwiseon.”

When the name Kim Hwiseon came up, Myeong showed a human reaction for the first time. His shoulders twitched. What is love? It’s ridiculous.

“I’d like to know more about Ms. Kim Hwiseon’s son.”

“…I’ve already told you everything.”

Finally, Myeong opened his mouth. His voice was hoarse and strained.

“Well, I wanted to hear it directly from you. I also have some additional questions. I’m sorry if my hyung startled you… Oh, have you had lunch?”

“…”

“Let’s grab a meal first. I’m hungry too.”

“No…”

“Sorry, but this isn’t a.LEADING

System: I left Myeong, who was wearing only a stretched-out T-shirt, and stepped outside. Could a place like this even be called a home? Come to think of it, Woo Seonrim had also lived in a semi-basement before meeting me. Myeong’s empty, corpse-like expression overlapped with Woo Seonrim’s from back then.

It wasn’t just a bottom-rung, lowlife existence—it was the kind of face only someone with death clinging to their very life could have… It felt awful. The urge for a cigarette, which I’d suppressed for months, hit me hard.

That damned Woo Seonrim. If he was going to disappear, he could’ve at least lived well. I didn’t even expect him to live uprightly. He just shouldn’t have gotten himself beaten up. He should’ve lived like a selfish bastard instead.

“Damn it.”

I muttered a curse as I got into the car. All I’d done was start an investigation to pave a smooth path for Woo Seonrim’s music career. There was no need to come all the way here, harass Myeong, and dig into stories about Woo Seonrim’s biological mother.

So why was I doing this? It felt absurd. My interest in Woo Seonrim was excessive. I couldn’t just care moderately.

“You’re not saying it, but you’re pretty fond of me.”

That absurdly bold, confident voice echoed in my head. Don’t make me laugh. Why would I care about someone like you? I gritted my teeth, arguing with the voice in my mind. What a pathetic state.

Just then, Myeong stumbled out of the building. He grimaced as if seeing sunlight for the first time in ages. Look at that. I don’t know what love is, but it’s definitely ridiculous. In the end, it makes a fool out of people.

I brought Myeong to a high-end Chinese restaurant I’d reserved. Slurp, Myeong shoveled noodles into his mouth greedily.

“Wow, you’re eating well.”

I can’t stand people who make smacking noises while eating, so I lost my appetite and put down my chopsticks early. As I quietly waited for Myeong to finish his meal, I mentally reviewed the information about him.

Won Jinmyeong. Of Chinese descent, in his late forties. He’d been to prison twice as a fall guy for higher-ups. After being kicked out of the organization two years ago, he’d been scraping by with factory work. But after hearing about the death of Woo Seonrim’s biological mother, Kim Hwiseon, he quit the factory and went into hiding.

Myeong wasn’t a powerful figure in this industry—meaning the underworld of thugs. He was likely one of the expendable lackeys who’d be the first to be cut loose. Without a strong backer or sharp skills, it’s hard to climb high in this world. In the end, wits matter everywhere.

Still, he’d been in the game long enough that Choi Geonyeong could track down his recent whereabouts through a few connections.

“While digging into Woo Seonrim’s mother instead of him, I found out this guy named Won Jinmyeong was going around to private investigators looking for Kim Hwiseon. I thought, who is this guy? But then I realized I’d met him once or twice in passing. I’ve got a knack for remembering people, you know.”

Choi Geonyeong had bragged incessantly while sharing the information he’d gathered.

“Little bro, be careful with Woo Seonrim,” he’d said, lowering his voice seriously before quickly pivoting to boast about his insight, fishing for endless praise. What an exhausting guy. His need for affection and validation will never be satisfied until he dies.

“He was schoolmates with Kim Hwiseon. Gave him a few hits, and he spilled everything. Though, he’s half out of his mind. The person he was loyal to is already dead. He last saw Kim Hwiseon about ten years ago, with her son by her side.”

I stared at Myeong, who was wolfing down his food, and said, “You loved her a lot, didn’t you?”

“…”

“I’m asking if you loved Ms. Kim Hwiseon a lot.”

Myeong, who had been shoving food into his mouth, froze. Well, well. Kim Hwiseon’s name was like a cheat code. Cough, cough. Myeong choked and coughed harshly. I grimaced and handed him a tissue. Ugh, gross…

After catching his breath, Myeong said, “Why are you looking for Seon?”

“To be precise, I’m looking for her son.”

In truth, I’d already found him, and he’s at my place now.

“That kid’s crazy.”

The moment Woo Seonrim came up, Myeong’s face filled with hostility.

“When was the last time you saw Woo Seonrim, Mr. Myeong… Hmm, wasn’t he about sixteen?”

“Around that…”

“And you’re calling a kid crazy? He’s not your son, so don’t be too harsh. Just because you broke up with Ms. Hwiseon doesn’t mean you have to hate the kid too, right?”

“It’s not because he’s another man’s kid. He was really crazy.”

“Fine, let’s say that’s true. So what? You’re a druggie, and I’m the son of a thug.”

Even though I thought Woo Seonrim was unhinged myself, hearing someone else trash him pissed me off. I wanted to argue for no reason. I don’t even understand my own heart.

“Doesn’t some of the blame for Woo Seonrim turning out like that fall on Ms. Kim Hwiseon? Dragging a talented kid off the stage and into some messed-up place, wasting his life.”

Myeong’s hands trembled.

“Seon wasn’t that kind of person.”

“What kind of person was she, then?”

“Seon loved her kid. Raising him without a father—she did her part.”

“Sure, the guy who knocked her up and left is the worst bastard. Do you know who the father was?”

Myeong shook his head glumly. Not knowing the father at all? In some ways, Woo Seonrim’s biological father was a worse scumbag than our boss, Mr. Choi.

“Seon was a good appa.”

“…”

“She was just trying to survive back then…”

“But can you stop calling her Seon? Is that a nickname?”

“Yes. That’s what I always called her.”

I clicked my tongue shortly.

Seon-ie. That was the nickname my mom used for me too. What a twisted coincidence that it matched Woo Seonrim’s mother’s nickname. My name doesn’t even have “Seon” in it, so why did she keep calling me that? It made my heart uneasy.

“I feel sorry for Seon. How did she end up trapped in a place like that…?”

“If you felt so sorry for her, why didn’t you get her out ten years ago?”

“…”

“Don’t say you didn’t know she’d disappear soon after. You just lacked the resolve, right? Or you could say courage.”

My words kept coming out sharp.

“That’s not…”

“What woman would entrust her life to a man like you? I wouldn’t either.”

“…”

“If you were an upright guy, you’d have gone to the police. But since you were dealing drugs, that wasn’t an option.”

“…”

“You were a lowlife, so you didn’t even know which line Kim Hwiseon’s people were connected to. Just a useless human.”

Uncontrollable mockery spilled out. I’d initially tried to treat him with some courtesy, but I didn’t see the need to be kind to someone badmouthing Woo Seonrim.

My stomach churned with every passing moment. It had been like this ever since Choi Geonyeong passed on the info.

“It seems like Kim Hwiseon got involved with some organization.”

“She wasn’t originally one of those people, so how’d it happen?”

“No idea why. No clue what role she played there either.”

It was a shadowy organization. It definitely operated in Korea at some point, but no one knew much. Only a few people, like Myeong, had fleeting contact through one-off deals, and even they had almost no info on Kim Hwiseon’s group.

“Even my side can’t dig up anything. Not sure how long they were active in Korea. Seems like they operated like a cell-based network.”

Choi Geonyeong had warned me with uncharacteristic seriousness.

“I’m still digging into New Zealand, but nothing’s coming up. That’s what makes it weirder. Woo Seonrim’s definitely not an ordinary civilian. This isn’t something my connections can easily handle, so how are you gonna deal with it? No need to get your hands dirty.”

“Dirty? Woo Seonrim probably just followed his mom into the organization. It wasn’t his choice. He was in middle school back then.”

“The past is the past. You don’t keep a liar by your side. Can you swear he’s completely clean now?”

So what if he isn’t? What if he’s out there selling drugs and killing people? So what? Our family’s rooted in thugs anyway. Who are we to judge… I barely held back from saying that.

Woo Seonrim’s past was more tangled than I’d expected, but I didn’t feel like cutting him loose. It was absurdly naive, but that’s how my heart felt.

I was just sad. That young Woo Seonrim had vanished from the stage so futilely, against his will.

There’s no way Woo Seonrim chose to join that organization to become a druggie. There had to be adult circumstances, but the only person who could explain them, Ms. Kim Hwiseon, was already gone.

Isn’t this child abuse? I thought I had my share of struggles, but Woo Seonrim’s no slouch. What’s with his life? A kid with dazzling talent, stuck in the muck for years. The world’s unfair and arbitrary.

“Fucking hell…”

At my muttering, Myeong, who was about to pick up a piece of kkwobarow, put down his chopsticks. He glanced at me cautiously and said, “Why are you looking for Woo Seonrim?”

“To see if he’s really crazy. Why?”

Myeong hesitated, moving his lips a few times.

“He was really strange.”

“…”

“Seon complained about him. A lot. Said the kid was weird.”

“Even though it was her own son?”

“But he really was strange…”

I couldn’t argue with that—it was a fact I had to agree with.

“How so? Anything beyond what you told my hyung?”

I crossed my arms, trying to calm my churning emotions. My neck was stiff with tension. Myeong, watching me carefully, began to talk.

Back then, Myeong was a middleman for deals. When he reunited with Kim Hwiseon during a major transaction, he thought she was caught up with bad people. She wasn’t the type to get involved in dirty business—at least, that’s how he remembered his first love.

“Later, I met Seon separately and asked her. It seemed like they had some big leverage over her. I asked if it was debt, but she said it wasn’t money, and that everything was fine, so we should run away together…”

“…”

“But kind, soft-hearted Seon said she didn’t want to drag me into it. She just couldn’t do it… shedding tears, like pearls…”

“Hey, man.”

He was getting emotional, practically crying. I let out a hollow laugh, dumbfounded. Talking to him in person, it didn’t even seem like he and Kim Hwiseon were lovers. Were the things she told him even true?

“She told me to come over to her side and live together. Said she’d introduce me to her son first. I tried to be good to him at first. Like a stepdad…”

“Anyone would think you two were actually married.”

“But the kid wouldn’t talk. No expression either. Maybe he didn’t like me… Seon tried hard. Introduced me to her friends, took me around to have fun. I tried hard too.”

“…”

“Why didn’t she take me with her? Why’d she leave me behind? What was I lacking…?”

Thud! Myeong suddenly slammed his head onto the table. The dishes rattled. He mumbled incoherently, smashing his forehead with enough force to crack it.

Thud, thud! A middle-aged man relentlessly banging his head on the table, hurting himself. I’d seen crazy people before, but this was exhausting.

“Hey, ease up. I didn’t rent out the whole place for this.”

“Seon, Seon-ah…” he sobbed.

I grabbed his shoulders to stop him, but it was no use. He cried pitifully, banging until his forehead swelled red and his nose bled. Then, as if all strength left him, he slumped in the chair, staring at me.

“Damn it.”

I cursed under my breath, aimed at Choi Geonyeong. That punk. Bringing me a tainted source and telling me to be careful.

“He seemed a bit mentally off, but he was working fine recently. Probably not full-on schizophrenia,” Choi Geonyeong had casually added.

Bashing his head until his face was bloody? That’s not “a bit” off—it’s way off.

I couldn’t take Myeong’s words at face value. There might be a lot of delusion mixed in. Did he even really meet Kim Hwiseon? The only verified fact was that they went to the same elementary and middle school.

Myeong, with unfocused eyes, mumbled, “What was I lacking? Where did I go wrong… I shouldn’t have, at that reservoir…”

“Reservoir?”

A word not in Choi Geonyeong’s intel popped up. I tossed a wad of tissues at Myeong’s face and said, “Tell me more about this reservoir.”

He didn’t even look at me anymore. Staring into space, mumbling, he was clearly gone. Then he suddenly shuddered, curling up like a child. Breathing fast, his armpits soaked with sweat.

“How’s that kid fine? After doing that. How?”

“That kid? Woo Seonrim?”

“He’s insane… Seon was right. She gave birth to a crazy kid. A murderer…”

“What?”

Foam formed at Myeong’s mouth as he collapsed sideways. Thud, his scrawny body hit the floor. I was too stunned to even think of catching him. A madman’s body thrashed on the floor, smearing it with blood and saliva.

I wanted to puke up everything I’d just eaten.

Murderer.

The word he’d muttered before collapsing echoed in my head.

I was on my way back after dumping Myeong in the hospital. I had no energy left. I was confused about what to believe and what to filter out. Even if Myeong regained his senses, could I trust anything he said?

My head throbbed. Why was life so complicated? Despite everything, my desire was simple: I just wanted to keep listening to Woo Seonrim’s music. That’s why I wanted him by my side.

I pressed my temples, wrestling with my thoughts. They collided endlessly in my mind.

…Murderer. If Woo Seonrim killed someone, could big hyung cover that up? It was ages ago, when he was a minor. But what if it wasn’t just once? That New Zealand fire… Am I supposed to protect a murderer and end up killing Mr. Choi for it? What kind of farce is this?

No, Choi Yisak, snap out of it. Believe a lunatic? Would Woo Seonrim kill someone for no reason? Lack of faith, huh? Faith? Damn it, hold on. What do I even know about him to trust? He’s barely worth a rat’s ass in terms of reliability. Always dodging, disappearing without a word.

I hope it’s not disappearing again. I habitually turned on my phone to check the home CCTV screen.

“He’s dozing off…”

Woo Seonrim was asleep on the living room sofa, his long body curled up awkwardly. If he’s going to sleep, he might as well go to bed. It’s uncomfortable enough for a lanky guy like him.

I stared at the screen for a while until Mr. Kim, the driver, snapped me out of it.

“Director, your work phone keeps getting calls…”

“Oh.”

I was so engrossed in the CCTV footage that I hadn’t noticed the vibrations. When I picked up the work-only phone, I saw a call from Han Yeser. For some reason, my heavy heart felt a little lighter.

“Yes. This is Choi Yisak.”

— Wow, you picked up fast.

“Sorry. Something complicated came up.”

— I heard you weren’t at the company either.

“You called the office too. What’s up?”

— It’s about Woo Seonrim’s activities. You mentioned increasing media exposure before the album release. I was thinking about inviting him as a guest performer for our event. We’re planning something.

It was a straightforward work-related conversation. Exactly the kind of talk I desperately needed. I’d been so consumed with thoughts of death that I felt like I was losing my mind. Talking about music I love and Woo Seonrim eased the splitting headache a bit.

I listened quietly to Han Yeser’s plans before speaking up.

“Ms. Yeser, that’s a great idea. Wherever he goes, he’s bound to make waves. Woo Seonrim has the skills, the story, and the face…”

— Right, right.

“But…”

— Why does your voice sound like that all of a sudden?

“I think it’d be better to take things slow.”

— That’s weird. You’re usually more impatient than me.

“Should I say Woo Seonrim isn’t quite ready yet? His past is a bit complicated…”

— School bullying?

“No, no. He’d have to have gone to school to be involved in anything like that. Let’s meet up soon and talk.”

I couldn’t spill all the details to Han Yeser, so I just made plans to meet. It was impulsive. The desire to escape this stressful situation probably played a part. Maybe I could share some of Woo Seonrim’s original songs with her. Just imagining it felt exciting and freeing. They say joy grows when shared, and it’s true.

Meanwhile, the car had arrived at the parking lot. I nodded to Mr. Kim, who opened the door for me, and headed toward the elevator. Suddenly, a large lump in the corner of the parking lot twitched.

“Ms. Yeser, I’ll call you back later… ugh.”

It was Woo Seonrim, jumping out from the corner to block my way. He snatched my phone and abruptly ended the call. Stunned, I gaped at him, mouth opening and closing.

“Mr. Seonrim, why are you here?”

“…You didn’t come.”

“Huh?”

“You didn’t show up, Director. I waited because I thought you might be out drinking again.”

“In the parking lot? For what? Are you crazy?”

“Were you with Han Yeser?”

“No.”

“You didn’t go to the company either. What were you doing?”

“This isn’t jealousy—it’s obsession. People might see us. Let’s go inside.”

I grabbed Woo Seonrim’s arm and dragged him along. His face was still stern as he muttered quickly.

“Every time you do this, Director, it drives me crazy. You don’t think about the person waiting at home.”

“Home? This is your home now? I bought you a place. Go there.”

“Why do you keep trying to send me away? What are you going to do? Call someone else over? Meet Han Yeser too? You said you’re not getting married, so shouldn’t you cut things off cleanly? How can someone… ugh.”

Even in the elevator, he kept yammering, so I pinched his lips shut with two fingers.

“Stop it.”

“…”

Woo Seonrim glared at me with reddened eyes. This guy… a murderer? Does that even make sense? The incident at the Chinese restaurant a few hours ago felt like a lie. Was it all a dream?

“God, you’re driving me insane, really.”

“Woo… why…”

His words slurred as I pinched his lips. He’s acting cute without even knowing what I’ve been through because of him. It’s infuriating.

I dragged him by his swollen lips all the way to the entrance. Only after we got inside did I let go. Woo Seonrim muttered with a darkened expression.

“…That hurt.”

His lips were red and puffed up.

“Yeah, I pinched you to hurt.”

“I don’t get why you’re mad.”

“Just because I can’t stand the sight of you. What other reason do I need?”

I could push Woo Seonrim away and hurt him with words countless times. I could curse him out endlessly without hesitation. But what he does behind my back makes it seem like I’m the one…

“Whatever you say, Director, I’m used to it.”

“Used to what?”

“I like you, so it’s fine. You seem tired. Want me to play something for you?”

“…”

“If you get hard listening, I’ll even suck you off.”

“You bastard. If you’d just stick to one verse, I might actually like you.”

I barely held back from slapping him. Woo Seonrim looked down at me, then slowly reached out. He’s gotten pretty good at pulling me into his arms and trying to kiss me.

“You see these hollow eyes and still want to kiss?”

“Of course.”

Why does this guy like me? The fundamental question bubbled up. Why do I obsess over everything about Woo Seonrim, not just his music, and exhaust myself? Why is he so difficult, overwhelming… and pitiful?

I’m so tired. Love is for idiots. Myeong, who self-harmed until his face was ruined, is a prime example. He’s headed for a psych ward now, always under my watch. Even after ten years, he couldn’t let go of Kim Hwiseon, chasing private investigators and ending up like that.

But I’m no different. If I hadn’t been captivated by Woo Seonrim’s music at eighteen, if I hadn’t clung to that desire until thirty, I wouldn’t be in this mess.

I sighed and pushed Woo Seonrim’s face away with my palm.

“Mr. Seonrim, let me ask you one thing.”

“Yes.”

“I’m asking seriously, so answer honestly. It’s better for both of us.”

“Yes.”

“Have you ever killed someone?”

“No.”

Woo Seonrim answered without a second’s hesitation, then tilted his chin and kissed me.

…What’s with this guy? Doesn’t a question like that usually make someone flinch? I was trying to steer this into a serious conversation, but this guy just shoves his tongue in my mouth. I was so stunned and baffled that I missed the chance to push him away.

He’s a lunatic. A murderer… Myeong’s murmurs echoed in my head.

The most ridiculous part was my body reacting to this kiss. I didn’t struggle once as Woo Seonrim carried me into the practice room.

Thud. The practice room door closed with a heavy, soft sound. The soundproofed, silent space suddenly filled with noise.

The sound of tongues messily intertwining, my dress shirt crumpling in his grip, my footsteps stumbling backward, then my back hitting the piano with a thump. There was nowhere left to retreat.

“Ugh…”

Woo Seonrim grabbed my waist and pressed himself against me. My back arched further. At this rate, I’d end up sprawled on the piano. This lunatic. What kind of blasphemy is this on a sacred instrument?

I finally snapped out of it and twisted my legs, trapped between his. Woo Seonrim staggered briefly but didn’t stop kissing. His large hand soon gripped my jaw tightly. My mouth opened involuntarily, and there was no way to stop the tongue invading it.

It was an embarrassing, crude, ravenous kiss. My lips were already tingling. Woo Seonrim’s kisses were getting more persistent by the day. Even now, he tilted my jaw, biting my lips and sucking in my saliva.

With a press, Woo Seonrim pushed his lower body against mine. Something hot and hard pressed against my thigh. Oh, damn. Goosebumps. I’m getting goosebumps… I squeezed my eyes shut and pounded his back with clenched fists. Thud, thud. Despite the forceful hits, Woo Seonrim didn’t budge. I hit him hard enough to bruise, but still.

In the end, I let my body go limp. It’s always like this. Woo Seonrim would suddenly pounce and crash his lips into mine. I could never tell what got him going. No matter how much I struggled, he wouldn’t stop. This is harassment. I could yell and threaten later, but Woo Seonrim would just look at me calmly without a word.

Getting mad only hurt me. Even when he acted out, I was the one who couldn’t let him go. So at some point, I started getting just mildly annoyed before giving in to the kiss.

Tongues rubbing together. I used to think kissing was unhygienic and disgusting, but I’ve gotten used to it.

Woo Seonrim always seemed so thrilled after kissing. Watching him excitedly head to the practice room made me think it was bearable. Except for the times I was blackout drunk, he never asked for more than a kiss.

That’s how it was supposed to be. But suddenly, his cold fingers slipped under my shirt.

“Ugh!”

With my mouth blocked by Woo Seonrim’s, I yelped in surprise. A silent cry echoed in my throat.

Woo Seonrim tugged my shirt out of my pants and tapped at my side. This bastard… My body trembled with rage. He ignored my serious question like it was nothing.

His fingers slid toward my ribs. Unable to hold back, I bit down hard on the tongue stirring in my mouth.

Blink. Woo Seonrim paused, opened his eyes, and looked at me. I clamped down harder on his tongue with my front teeth. It had to hurt. Normally, someone would yelp and pull back.

But Woo Seonrim just stood there, as if daring me to bite his tongue off. He didn’t seem to care if it bled. His dark eyes were calm as ever. His cold fingers kept tracing my skin like he was playing the piano.

Overwhelmed by his audacity, I felt frustrated and angry, my eyes twisting. I shouldn’t have kept someone like him around. I felt foolish for rushing to him after hearing Myeong’s story. I worried about him with pure intentions, but this guy clearly only cared about my body. Like a dog in heat.

I felt drained and let go of his tongue. It hurt. I thought my feelings were pure, almost platonic admiration. But Woo Seonrim was just a lust-driven bastard, clearly only thinking about how to sleep with me…

“Are you crying?”

“What are you talking about?”

Woo Seonrim, who had been pressing forward, suddenly pulled back. He tilted his head and stared at me.

“Your eyes are red.”

He gently brushed my eyes with his thumb. Talk about giving me pain and then soothing it.

“It’s because I’m pissed off at you.”

“Was the kiss bad?”

“You think it was just a kiss? Would I have bitten your tongue if it was good?”

“I thought you were excited.”

“Bullshit.”

“Last time you bit me like that, I thought you liked it.”

“When did I—”

“When I was sucking you off. You kept biting my fingers when I put them in your mouth…”

“I don’t remember, you bastard. Shut up.”

I swore to myself again never to get blackout drunk. Why would he put his fingers in my mouth? And I bit them like I enjoyed it? Unbelievable, but I was half-crazed that day, so it’s not impossible.

Woo Seonrim stepped back, lips pursed as if deep in thought. His gaze scanned me up and down, making me feel like a lab specimen, which pissed me off more.

My nerves were on edge. Being around Woo Seonrim never let my temper settle. As I rubbed my mouth with the back of my hand, he finally spoke.

“Director, why are you mad?”

His voice was calm and measured.

“I don’t get it. I can’t even believe you didn’t like the kiss. Your dick’s already half-hard.”

“Damn it, that’s… it’s like Pavlov’s dog. You always play music after kissing, so it’s just a reflex…”

“Oh, right. I’ll play for you today too.”

“Damn it, is that all?”

“What else is there?”

Woo Seonrim looked genuinely confused. Honestly, I didn’t fully understand why I was so furious either. Him acting weird wasn’t new. But today, I felt beyond annoyed—I was hurt and wronged.

I rubbed my heated face with my palms, blurting out whatever came to mind.

“Hey. I said I wanted to have a serious talk.”

“…”

“But you don’t even pretend to listen, damn it. You say you like me, but you hide everything about yourself. What kind of guy are you, really…”

“…”

“Acting all pitiful but only thinking about sex. Late to the game and all reckless. Pushing forward with brute force and dodging serious talk. How am I supposed to like a guy like you? Damn it, I can’t even stand looking at you. Get lost.”

The longer I spoke, the angrier I got. My forehead burned, and my eyes throbbed. My vision blurred, and all I could see was Woo Seonrim. He’s an incomprehensible creature. The more I learn about him, the further away he feels.

Is he just a young, pitiful victim? Sometimes victims become perpetrators. He might be hiding everything behind that flawless face, deceiving me. The thought of him lying to me made my blood boil. And I, who sways with his every word, am probably not sane either.

Woo Seonrim, silently listening, rolled his eyes. His lips twitched slightly. His dazed expression made me think he was zoning out, and I was about to yell when he suddenly stepped forward and hugged me tightly.

His arms firmly gripped my back. I felt pulled into his embrace. My shoulders hunched, and my breath caught.

“Hey, what are you—”

“You’re curious about me, right?”

I froze, about to hit his back. His voice, muffled against my shoulder, was so different—unsteady, wavering, with a hint of tears. His breath was hot and damp.

I was the one angry, but Woo Seonrim was trembling with emotion. Typical of his unpredictable nature.

“Just like I’m curious about you, Director, you want to know more about me.”

“You’re suspicious as hell.”

“I’m touched.”

“…What? By what?”

“They say you love someone when you’re curious about them. This proves you like me.”

“Who says that?”

“It was in a book.”

I knew it when he started buying those weird romance books. This era of rampant misinformation is dangerous. Swept up in intense emotion, Woo Seonrim muttered quickly.

“I didn’t know you liked me this much. I’m sorry.”

I was dumbfounded by his conviction.

“Are you crazy?”

“I didn’t know you’d be this upset. I’m really sorry.”

“Damn it, you’re not even pretending to listen.”

“My story’s boring and upsetting anyway. I thought it was better not to say. Guess I was wrong.”

“Ha…”

“Did you look into me? Or hear from Choi Geonyeong? Either way, it’s proof of love. You put in effort. That’s touching.”

To think he’d react like this to being investigated. All my worries about him finding out felt pointless. I expected him to be offended or wary, not overjoyed to the point of getting harder.

I went limp in his arms, leaning into him. Whatever happens, happens.

“If you’re so touched, spill everything about your life.”

“Me? It’s nothing much.”

“You’re hiding a ton.”

“Hmm.”

Finally, Woo Seonrim let me go a bit and met my eyes. I stared at him, mulling things over, feeling more exhausted. I didn’t need a mirror to know I looked drained—pale, with dark circles. Unlike me, Woo Seonrim seemed more vibrant than usual.

“Really, it’s nothing. I just grew up in a closed-off community.”

He always dodged questions about his past, but now he spoke.

“Why’d you go abroad?”

“The community was based overseas. It had a strong religious vibe. I went with my mom.”

“…School?”

“Homeschooling.”

“You’re making a cult sound like a long story.”

“Well, you could see it that way.”

Woo Seonrim was calm, as if talking about something trivial. If he really was in a cult, his drug deals with Myeong make sense. Cults often make money through shady means.

“You left and came back to Korea?”

“Yeah. There was nowhere left to stay.”