CEL 65

The next project was decided as a courtroom drama. When he answered, as always, I will do my best, to the agency’s encouragement that said, this time grit your teeth and try, they even submitted the application themselves and told him to attend a trial before the script reading.

He wanted to refuse the troublesome arrangement, but when he heard that the lawyer was a peer who had been gaining much attention lately, he felt a small interest.

If he was his age, then he would not be considered old in the industry, but could he already become this famous?

The fact that they came from the same university also made him cutious. If he thought about the age difference, they might have run into each other on campus a few times by chance.

Since there was nothing particularly special going on anyway, he did not refuse further and he accepted readily. He stopped the manager who insisted on giving him a ride, and he drove the car to the courthouse.

When he went in wearing both a mask and a cap, he felt not like a visitor but like he had become a party in the trial, so on the way in he quietly took off only the cap. He thought that nobody would recognize him since he was not famous, and he wondered if he had made too much fuss.

Not long after he sat down, the trial began. There were no sensational scenes like the ones he usually saw in media. Most of the content seemed to have already been delivered to the judge in documents, and it was conducted mainly in a question and answer format.

The issue of the trial was about a biological father who had left the child born with his divorced spouse in neglect and had led the child to malnutrition. The prosecutor insisted it was a clear case of child abuse, and most people present seemed to agree. He turned his gaze and looked at the man sitting with a blank face.

Because of the hair brushed back with spray without a single stray strand, his round forehead was clearly visible, but it rather made him look younger. He had heard that the man was his age, but his appearance looked even younger than expected, and he unconsciously murmured.

“…That person is a lawyer?”

When he saw someone with an appearance as close to that of a celebrity as his own sitting at the defense table, he felt strange.

As his personality showed, even the cuffs of his sleeves had not a single crease, and as he thought that this person also lived a tiring life, the judge questioned him.

“The defendant admits to all charges, correct?”

While he was staring straight into the black eyes that were dark even to the irises, their eyes met briefly. It was a fleeting moment, enough to make him wonder if it was just his imagination.

“Yes, the defendant admits to all charges.”

What kind of voice was that…?

It was a pleasant voice. The pitch was low, and the rhythm was well controlled, so it felt as if it whispered at his ear.

After that, several more questions and answers were exchanged. When others spoke, he could hardly take in what they were saying, but whenever the man spoke, he stared at him without blinking.

“Defense attorney, please give the closing argument.”

His long eyelashes moved slowly up and down. Even though it was a situation where he might have felt nervous about giving the final argument, his gaze never dropped once. Finally, his quiet voice filled the courtroom.

“The poet Rainer Maria Rilke said. A person is not kind, not strong, and not wise…”

“…yet even if people show miserable appearances here and there. Yet even if misery and absurdity grow large. We must find a new path, and we must have the determination to move forward.”

As he listened to the words, he felt as if a small insect had entered his chest and tickled him. It was strange.

“I will not claim that the defendant’s past actions were morally right. But since the Republic of Korea adopts the principle of legality in punishment, interpretation of criminal statutes must be strict.”

The man’s argument was somewhat out of step with the moral standards of the general public. Some people frowned as they listened to him, and some clenched their fists as they looked at the defendant’s face that showed no remorse.

In such an atmosphere, one could have shrunk back, but the man looked calmly at the judge. Jaeha observed him with interest.

Before uttering the final sentence, the man’s eyes reached the defendant. His gaze seemed to declare that you will surely be acquitted.

The one who was startled as if struckhit by lightning at that gaze was himself.

His stomach tightened. His fingertips tingled, and his mouth went dry.

Had anyone ever given him such a look even once?

Even if someone criticized him, or even if what he did was something that others would condemn.

Was there even one person who had said that he would protect him anyway?

His stomach churned, and his thoughts grew tangled. At such times he always avoided the situation by picking up a pencil, but for the first time his mind burned so hot that no drawing came to him.

“The defendant is now tormented by his unwise past, and he is repenting. I ask you to give the defendant, who is regretting the past, an opportunity to find a new path and move forward.”

He felt a strange desire.

He wanted to know about that man.

As soon as he thought that, he picked up his phone.

What was that lawyer’s name? 4:37 p.m.

For the first time in his life, he thought he wanted to know what was inside another person’s head.

“Lawyer Seo Hamin.”

He called out to the man who was about to leave with a relaxed face. When he saw the doubtful eyes that did not recognize him, his face flushed hot.

If he had been a more famous actor, would this man have recognized him?

For the first time, he felt ashamed of being only an ordinary actor.

“Yes.”

“Hello. Well… I-I am an actor.”

“…Yes.”

At the slightly rising end of the reply, he pretended not to notice and continued.

“My name is Han Jaeha.”

He regretted it as soon as he said it. Could there be a conversation more foolish than this?

The other man seemed to think similarly, and a faint change appeared on his composed face. As the man stared at the hand he had offered without context, he felt heat slowly spread from his toes to his head. His palm dampened instantly, and his tongue stiffened.

Fortunately, the man did not brush aside the hand but clasped it naturally. Perhaps because a lawyer also worked in a service profession, the faint trace of wariness on his face disappeared quickly.

As his pale hand touched his, he felt a sudden shiver. He unconsciously tightened his grip, and a small crease formed on the man’s brow.

Cold sweat ran down his back. Knowing that if he continued speaking he would only spout foolish words, he lowered his head.

“Thank you!”

He clenched the fist that still carried warmth and ran to the parking lot. The pounding sound of his heart filled his head with noise.

Even as he got into the driver’s seat and locked the door, he did not think of unclenching his tightly held fingers, and he stared at them in silence. He childishly thought that if he opened his hand, the memory of the handshake would vanish.

“Seo Hamin… Seo Hamin…” The name even sounded like his own.

As he recalled the man’s dumbfounded last look, a smile appeared on his face. Though no one watched, he kept laughing.

He placed his arms on the steering wheel and buried his head in them. The phone vibrated a little later.

“Hello.”

–Hey, you watched the trial? It was not very fun, right? I said you did not need to go this far, but the boss….

“I want to see it again.”

–…What?

“I want to see it again.”

For a moment, the voice on the other side of the line stopped. Perhaps it was strange that he was making a request for the first time, because the manager stammered several times before he answered.

“Uh, yeah. The boss will like that. I will submit the application for you.”

“I want to watch Lawyer Seo Hamin’s trials.”

–Huh?

“Rather than looking at several references, I think it would be better to watch one person.”

Even though it was a strange reply, the manager readily agreed. Thanks to that, meeting him again afterward went smoothly. Because their schedules kept overlapping, he had to run out as soon as each trial ended, but he felt satisfied just watching him speak.

He also learned a few of Hamin’s small habits.

When he spoke, he inserted pauses to enhance clarity, and when he smiled, he tilted his chin slightly up, but the corners of his mouth never lifted past a certain angle. And he placed a pen between his third and fourth fingers and twirled it.

How did he do that?

He tried copying it several times during the hearings, but it was not easy. As he stifled a laugh and thought how odd a habit that was, his eyes met the man’s impassive face.

He felt the gaze linger on his face for quite a long time, and he bit his lower lip. Since this was already the fourth hearing, it was impossible not to notice.

Yet if the man kept that expression of annoyance, it hurt.

As he tapped his cheek and wondered what to do, a text came from his manager.

Manager

I will send you the filming schedule, check it and call me. 3:09 p.m.

It was the news that the drama filming dates had been fixed.