SLC 15
by Lilium“No, I mean. That’s not what he meant, that person is….”
“So to a rich kid, dogs and cows look like a beggar1?
…My friend. I’m not a dog or a cow.
“Dogs and cows are beggars though. Do dogs or cows have money?”
It was a battlefield of ignorance so childish it was beyond words. People around them started looking over and whispering. Even the bodyguards noticed something and watched them closely. If Mok Seongha caused a scene, they’d step in. Kim Jinkyung decided it was better to stop Seo Sangil, who was at least a year older.
“Seo Sangil. Let’s talk later. Okay?”
“You were tutoring while getting treated like that? Listening to that crap just because he gives you a few extra bucks?”
It wasn’t just a few extra bucks. But this wasn’t the time to argue about that.
“What’s wrong with you? He’s just a kid.”
“A kid my ass. He’s a guy a whole head taller than you. What kind of kid is that? Quit right now. If you’ve got nowhere to stay, live in the entryway of our house. If you’re short on money, I’ll even take out loan sharks and cover it for you.”
Seo Sangil’s strength was his loyalty. He took good care of his people. But right now, that strength wasn’t helping.
“What loan sharks? Stop it. Let’s talk later. Okay? Later. I’ll explain everything.”
Kim Jinkyung grabbed Seo Sangil’s arm and pleaded. Mok Seongha’s cold gaze swept over the two of them.
“Hey. Come here. You’re picking up his smell.”
Mok Seongha yanked Kim Jinkyung’s arm.
“What? Smell?”
I told you not to talk about smells.
Kim Jinkyung turned to Mok Seongha in shock.
“Why are you being so nice to a guy who’s trying to squeeze money out of you?”
Even while talking to Kim Jinkyung, Mok Seongha glared at Seo Sangil.
“He’s not squeezing money out of me. I’m lending it to him. He’s my friend. We went to the same high school.”
“Why would he borrow money from you? Might as well skin a flea.”
“…It’s not skin, it’s liver….”2
When we get back, I really need to redo his Korean tutoring schedule.
“Kim Jinkyung. Seriously, quit right now. Write your resignation.”
“Even if he writes it, I won’t accept it. He’s going to teach me until he dies.”
Until I die? So do I die after the college entrance exam?
Kim Jinkyung really wanted to cry.
“Who do you think you are to tell my friend what to do?”
“Friend? Hey, are you really his friend?”
“He is my friend!”
Kim Jinkyung shouted indignantly.
“He looks at least ten years older than you.”
“He just looks old for his age.”
“So you’re not friends, you’re doing that kind of thing with…”
“Aaah!”
Kim Jinkyung screamed and blocked Mok Seongha’s mouth with both hands. Seo Sangil wasn’t the only one startled by the sudden move. Mok Seongha raised his brows and looked down at Kim Jinkyung.
“…?”
“Don’t say it.”
It was the first time Kim Jinkyung had spoken casually to Mok Seongha.
“Absolutely. Absolutely don’t say it.”
Mok Seongha nodded without thinking. Kim Jinkyung turned around and shouted at Seo Sangil.
“Seo Sangil, we’ll talk later. Go buy your coffee!”
“Hey. Kim Jinkyung.”
“Later!”
Kim Jinkyung dragged Mok Seongha out of the cafe. After pulling him into a deserted corner of the parking lot, Kim Jinkyung finally took his hand off Mok Seongha’s mouth.
“What the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?”
“What?”
Mok Seongha asked with a face that honestly looked clueless.
“…Why would you tell him that I like men?”
Kim Jinkyung lowered his voice as much as possible, afraid someone might hear.
“Why can’t I say it?”
“Who goes around telling other people stuff like that?”
“You told me on the first day we met.”
“……”
He did. More than once. He even emphasized how much he liked men.
“So I’m not other people?”
“…You’re a complete stranger.”
“Then why?”
Mok Seongha continued.
“You told a complete stranger like me, so why can’t you tell him, if he’s your friend like you say?”
Where was he even supposed to start explaining?
Kim Jinkyung sighed.
“…There are things that are harder to say to people you’re close to.”
“What’s hard about it? If you say you like men, are you going to get shot or something?”
“What are you even talking about…”
Kim Jinkyung stopped himself mid retort. Mok Seongha wasn’t teasing or mocking him. He was genuinely asking. A man who had lived alone at home almost his entire life seriously lacked any sense of social convention.
“…It’s not like that.”
“Then why?”
Kim Jinkyung had no intention of telling anyone that he liked men. At first, he was scared out of instinct. Later, he was still scared because he knew what could happen.
With his shoulders hunched, Kim Jinkyung barely managed to answer.
“…Because I think he’d be disappointed in me.”
“I wasn’t disappointed in you.”
Kim Jinkyung gave an awkward smile and said thank you. He wasn’t grateful. When you never expected anything in the first place, there was nothing to be disappointed about.
“As long as you don’t do that disgusting stuff in front of me.”
“…I said I won’t.”
“Then that’s fine.”
“……”
He felt lousy.
“Hey.”
“Yes.”
“But are you sure you weren’t getting money squeezed out of you?”
Mok Seongha bent down and met his eyes as he asked. For a moment, concern flickered in his fierce eyes.
Why is a dead cat acting so gentle?
Kim Jinkyung avoided his gaze and answered no.
“He really is my high school friend…. Here, a picture.”
Kim Jinkyung pulled up a photo from high school on his phone and showed it to Mok Seongha. He stared at Kim Jinkyung in his school uniform for a moment before speaking.
“Why are you the same?”
“Yes?”
“You look the same in your school uniform and now.”
“What’s the same? I even went to the army.”
“You’re the same.”
Mok Seongha snatched the phone from Kim Jinkyung’s hand and scrolled through the photos. Several pictures followed of a boy wearing a school uniform. Then a photo came up of Seo Sangil sleeping with his head down on a desk. Kim Jinkyung quickly reached out and grabbed the phone back.
“That’s my private life, so stop looking.”
…I took those ages ago and forgot about them. I need to delete them right now.
Kim Jinkyung turned away and started deleting the photos, and Mok Seongha tilted his head.
“It’s just a sleeping photo. It’s not even a dirty picture. Why?”
Kim Jinkyung turned to Mok Seongha in shock.
“…You saw it?”
“Yeah.”
Mok Seongha pointed at his own eyes.
“I’m good at seeing movement.”
“……”
Of course you are. You’re a panther.
Kim Jinkyung felt like his head was about to explode. The one saving grace was that this big cat who didn’t understand things like romantic feelings couldn’t possibly know what that photo meant.
“But it’s unexpected.”
“Yes? What is?”
“That that’s your type.”
“……”
Kim Jinkyung’s face turned completely pale. Mok Seongha looked down at him as if he really didn’t understand and drove the point home.
“You have low standards.”
…Let’s stop talking and study now.
When Kim Jinkyung said that with a bluish face, Mok Seongha nodded. Fortunately, he didn’t say anything else while they were tutoring. Kim Jinkyung also forced himself to focus on the lesson and not think about what had happened earlier.
The feeble peace between them was broken by a phone ringing. When he checked the caller, it was Seo Sangil. It seemed like he was still worried and had stepped out to call.
“Just a moment.”
Kim Jinkyung stood up. No, he tried to. He would have, if Mok Seongha hadn’t grabbed his sleeve.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to answer the call.”
Kim Jinkyung showed him the phone screen as he spoke.
“Why are you doing something else during tutoring?”
“……”
Kim Jinkyung was left speechless. Going to the bathroom or taking a short call was something they usually asked permission for and did without any issue.
“…It’ll just be a moment.”
“Sit down.”
His tone was firm. Kim Jinkyung hesitated for a moment, then sat back down. The phone started ringing again. When Kim Jinkyung didn’t know what to do, Mok Seongha asked “Why?”
“I’ll take the call briefly.”
It looked like it would keep ringing until he did.
Mok Seongha didn’t answer. He took Kim Jinkyung’s phone and pressed the button, turning it completely off.
They were working, so turning it off was probably right.
Kim Jinkyung sighed and put the phone back into his bag.
“What is so special about him that you ended up liking a face like that?”
The sudden question startled Kim Jinkyung, but he answered as calmly as he could.
“I don’t like him.”
“That’s not true. You do like him.”
“…I don’t.” Not anymore.
Kim Jinkyung lowered his gaze slightly and tapped the problem with his pen as he continued.
“Try solving this.”
Mok Seongha copied the problem onto his practice paper. As he wrote down the numbers without hesitation, he spoke again.
“I hate going outside. It smells, and it’s noisy.”
“……”
He recalled Secretary Kang’s words. He had said Mok Seongha stayed at home for 12 years. Kim Jinkyung had started outdoor tutoring for Mok Seongha’s sake, but now his own selfishness was mixed in too, which made him feel very guilty.
“Is that really a face you need to come out and look for? Do I even need to come outside to take lessons. Are your eyes stuck to the ground, teacher?”
“……”
The guilt instantly evaporated.
“That’s not it.”
“Then what is it?”
Kim Jinkyung felt a surge of emotion. No matter how much of a chronic unrequited lover he was, saying his eyes were stuck to the ground was a bit unfair.
“He’s not that….”
His eyes met Mok Seongha’s, who was looking at him. After meeting Mok Seongha, Kim Jinkyung learned for the first time that eyes could have that color. He also learned that very few people on earth had golden eyes.
Every time they caught the light, it looked like finely shattered golden jewels were sparkling inside them. It reminded him of a kaleidoscope he had seen as a child. Maybe because of that, sometimes just meeting Mok Seongha’s gaze made him feel dizzy and his insides churn.
Kim Jinkyung quickly lowered his head.
Looking at that face, he couldn’t bring himself to say that Seo Sangil’s face was enough to fall for.
Mok Seongha tilted his head and waited for Kim Jinkyung’s next words.
Sangil, I’m sorry. You’re enough to fall for.
“This is my private life. Stop it.”
Kim Jinkyung drew a line. Mok Seongha remained quiet for a moment, then muttered, “private life,” rolling the words around in his mouth.
“But wasn’t I taking lessons here because of your private life?”
“……”
There was nothing he could say, even if he had ten mouths. The old saying that choosing the easy and comfortable path would someday demand a price was always right.
“We’re tutoring, so solve the problems.”
“I don’t understand.”
Mok Seongha muttered with his pen between his lips.
“Which problem?” Kim Jinkyung quickly leaned forward.
“No, you.”
Mok Seongha looked at Kim Jinkyung and continued.
“You act like you’re into every guy in the world and mess around, but when I ask if you like that guy, why do you get that serious?”
Sometimes the perception he showed was terrifying. It felt like dealing with a wild animal that was playing around and then suddenly bit your hand.
“I’m serious because I don’t like him. Solve the problem.”
“You know he has a girlfriend? He reeks of a woman.”
“…I know.”
Of course he does, acting like a beast.
“So you shamelessly liked him even knowing that?”
“Back then he didn’t have…”
Kim Jinkyung quickly closed his mouth. The golden eyes flashed briefly, like a predator that had been crouching in the dark for a long time and finally spotted its prey.
“So you liked him.”
It felt like his neck had been bitten. Kim Jinkyung clutched his imaginary bleeding neck and tapped the workbook with his pen, pretending to be calm.
“Keep going. Why did you stop solving it?”
Mok Seongha continued the formula he had left unfinished. Kim Jinkyung deliberately stared only at the numbers and equations he was writing.
“I’m done.”
Mok Seongha got the answer. Kim Jinkyung checked it mentally and marked the wrong part with a red pen.
“Here, look at it once more and solve it again.”
Mok Seongha did as told and started solving it again. The sound of the pen scratching the paper continued without hesitation.
This time it’ll be right.
After confirming the line of numbers heading in the correct direction, Kim Jinkyung took a sip of coffee.
“Did you two do it?”
Startled by the sudden attack, Kim Jinkyung choked and sprayed coffee out. Mok Seongha frowned at him and said “Gross.”
“I’m sorry.”
Kim Jinkyung quickly wiped up the spilled coffee with a napkin. Mok Seongha pointed at Kim Jinkyung’s mouth.
“You, here.”
Kim Jinkyung wiped his lips too.
“How many times?”
“Am I crazy?”
Kim Jinkyung shouted.
“Well, you’d have to be out of your mind to do it with something like that.”
“That’s not it…”
Kim Jinkyung drank some cold water and pulled himself together.
“Well, what am I saying. He doesn’t even know I like men. And besides…”
Kim Jinkyung massaged between his brows. He felt a headache coming.
“How could I do that with a friend?”
“You can’t?”
“You can’t.”
Kim Jinkyung said firmly.
“Why?”
“……”
At this point, it started to get confusing. Was he really asking because he didn’t know?
“Usually you don’t do that with a friend. You have to keep seeing each other… and I have no intention of ever saying something like that.”
If possible, he planned to never say it. He didn’t want to, and he didn’t feel any need to.
“Then do you only sleep with guys you’ll never see again?”
“……”
…I don’t sleep with them. I haven’t. I can’t.
“You’re promiscuous.”
“…We’ll move on to the next page.”
“So if you sleep with someone once, you never see them again?”
Like a student begging a teacher to talk about their first love, Mok Seongha continued pestering him to talk about his sex life. It was his first time properly receiving tutoring, so getting into a teacher student role was fine, but this was crossing the line.
“If you keep this up, today’s lesson will…”
He was about to say they should stop here, but Mok Seongha stood up first. Before Kim Jinkyung could even ask what was going on, a bodyguard who had already approached handed over a phone. Mok Seongha answered the call. After a brief conversation, he closed the book.
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