NUTMEG 15

For example, Director Lim would suddenly create a situation on set that wasn’t in the script. And he would throw it at the actors without giving them any time to prepare in advance. The actors, who were flustered at first, would force themselves into the situation and the role after facing Director Lim, whose eyes were like those of a beast holding its breath while waiting for the hunt. Then, results that neither the actors nor the director had anticipated would emerge.

However, Minje never had the chance to experience that directly. It was because he was acting exactly as he had seen in the movie. Director Lim praised Minje every time, saying there was no need to direct him, but strangely, he seemed to be uneasy about it.

The scene being filmed today was the one where the tension that had been building up layer by layer finally overflows the dam. From the time he practiced with Wonoh, he had been acting exactly as he had seen in the movie, but after acting as ‘Eunsung’ for a month, it seemed that something of his own as ‘Eunsung’ had emerged within Minje. For some reason, if it were ‘Eunsung’, he wouldn’t act like that here. If it were ‘Eunsung’, he wouldn’t talk like that.

That thought would often fill Minje’s mind and then quickly scatter. But when the script was torn yesterday, it reared its head again, taut. The notes that had been packed into the script were none other than the acting of the ‘Eunsung’ in the movie that he remembered. In this part, get angry. In this part, hit his arm in the middle of talking. Long before filming began, he had painstakingly revived his faint memories and jotted them down.

Just because the script was torn out doesn’t mean he couldn’t remember those notes. Rather, it was more accurate to say that he felt a sense of relief, as if he had been freed from shackles.

“Camera roll!”

Minje, as ‘Eunsung’, stood outside the set and quietly collected his breath. It was the first time he was acting based on his own thoughts. Could he do it well…?

“Action!”

This boxing gym scene is in the middle of the movie, the part where a rift begins to form between the two who were closer than real brothers. A rumor had spread at school that the female student they both had a crush on had confessed to ‘Eunsung’, and the gym’s owner had suggested only to ‘Jaeho’, played by Wonoh, that he try entering an amateur competition. For the two who had always said, as if it were a habit, that they had no dreams for the future because they had no money, different futures began to appear, but ‘Jaeho’ and ‘Eunsung’ find it awkward to tell each other about it.

The camera began to roll, emitting the red light that indicated it was recording. Wonoh, in the role of ‘Jaeho’, is in workout clothes, talking to the gym owner. The way he is catching his breath while wrapping his hands suggests he has just finished training. The door opens, and ‘Eunsung’, in his school uniform, enters the gym. The expression on ‘Jaeho’s’ face as he enters seems to be displeased about something.

“You’re here? Thought you weren’t coming.”

“When have I ever not come.”

‘Eunsung’, who chuckled nonchalantly, took his workout clothes out of the school bag he had placed on the bench.

“Saw you leaving with Kim Jihyun earlier, thought you were on a date?”

“We just ate.”

“What did you eat?”

“……What are you going to do with that information.”

In the original movie, the tone of this line was angry from the start. As if this scene was made for them to fight. But Minje thought that if he were ‘Eunsung’, he wouldn’t want to fight with ‘Jaeho’. As he answered after a pause, Wonoh also responded in a softer tone.

“Ah, I’m just asking what you ate.”

His tone dragged out the end, as if he were trying to be cute. A smile naturally formed on his lips, and the next line was delivered playfully.

“I ate tteokbokki, you crazy bastard.”

“Did you buy?”

“What, should we split it, twenty-five hundred won each?”

Minje smiled as he took off his uniform shirt and roughly stuffed it into his bag. The red t-shirt he was wearing underneath was revealed. Wonoh moved his seat altogether and plopped down on the bench where Minje’s bag was.

“Did you guys really decide to go out?”

“So what if we did.”

The ‘Eunsung’ that Minje envisioned was very prideful. As is often the case with people who have nothing but their pride, he didn’t want to show a pathetic or weak side in front of the people he liked. So, despite his meager allowance, he bought Jihyun tteokbokki, and because he lacked the money and peace of mind for dating, he couldn’t properly answer her confession, but he didn’t want to tell his friend about it as it was.

But surely, he must think that ‘Jaeho’ would understand his situation even without him saying much. That’s why ‘Jaeho’s’ next line was quite jarring to Minje’s, and ‘Eunsung’s’, heart.

“Does Kim Jihyun know you ran away from home right now?”

“……Why would she need to know that.”

“If you’re dating, she should at least know where you live, shouldn’t she.”

“……”

‘Eunsung’ had run away from home and was living at ‘Jaeho’s’ house with his grandmother. ‘Eunsung’s’ family situation isn’t detailed in the movie, but Minje and Wonoh had playfully created ‘Eunsung’s’ unseen backstory while practicing the script together. An alcoholic father and a cheating mother. And ‘Eunsung’, who couldn’t stand his father’s violence, ran away from home and is now freeloading at his best friend’s house.

So Wonoh or ‘Jaeho’, who knew his situation, shouldn’t have said such things to ‘Eunsung’. Every time Minje read the script, he felt disappointed in ‘Jaeho’ at this line. And now, he was disappointed in Wonoh too. We came up with the backstory together. You know his situation perfectly well, and you say something like that to your one and only friend? Minje’s expression naturally hardened.

“Hey, Lee Eunsung! If you’re late, hurry up and change your clothes and start jumping rope! Jaeho decided to enter the amateur competition, so you should spar with him a bit later, okay?”

The supporting actor playing the gym owner delivered his prepared lines, patting Minje on the shoulder as he passed. In that moment, the air froze solid. A look of panic crossed the face of ‘Jaeho’, who had been cornering ‘Eunsung’ until just a moment ago.

“Hey. No, I was about to tell you.”

“You’re entering the amateur competition? Congratulations.”

“Uh, no. It really hasn’t been long since it came up. It’s been even less time since I decided. I was really about to tell you. Ah, the gym owner…”

“Really? When were you going to tell me?”

“……Today.”

Minje snatched up his school bag again with a jerk and strode towards the exit.

“Hey! Where are you going! Aren’t you going to spar with me?!”

At those words, Minje stopped his quick steps in front of the door and slowly turned around.

“I’m going on a date with Kim Jihyun.”

“Cut!”

Director Lim, who had been watching without a single interruption, called cut. Minje peeked the door he had slammed shut open and quickly stood in front of the monitor. Wonoh, who had arrived first, wrapped an arm around Minje’s shoulder. Everyone was silent as they monitored the scene, which had been a one-take shot lasting over five minutes.

It was a silence that felt like needles pricking the back of his head. His appearance on the monitor looked so awkward too. Before, he was just imitating the movie, so he didn’t feel anything special watching himself on screen, but now that he had acted as he pleased, he was so embarrassed.

“…Should I try getting angry from the ‘What are you going to do with that information’ part after all…?”

When the five minutes that felt like fifty had passed and the monitor screen finally returned to the first scene, Minje blurted out the words he had been wanting to say all along. At that, Director Lim whipped his head around and grabbed Minje’s arm tightly. Beneath his shaggy hair, his eyes were flashing.

“No, this is so good!!! Let’s go a few more takes with this emotion, and then we’ll get the close-ups right after! Please get ready for standby!”

“…Really?”

“Yeah!! The picture looks much better than I thought!! Even without getting angry, the emotions are so much richer and the drama just comes to life! This is really why I make movies, you guys. You’re the best!”

At Director Lim’s words, Wonoh held out the palm of his arm that wasn’t around his shoulder. Minje gave him a high-five with a loud smack. The lighting director, getting excited along with them, said he would change the lighting to be a bit prettier, and the set became busy.

But Director Lim, who was staring intently at the monitor that was returning to the first shot, scratched his right ear, nervously bounced his left leg, rolled his eyes left, right, up, and down, then whipped his head around and said to the two of them.

“Shall we try changing just one setup? Instead of the gym owner telling him, let’s have ‘Eunsung’ ask directly. You can ad-lib the lines appropriately, right?”

Director Lim’s mid-shoot utterance of ‘Shall we try changing just one setup?’ was tantamount to saying, ‘Shall we try shooting all night?’, but Minje nodded with a flushed face.

Acting was fun. Much more so than dancing and singing.

“Does Kim Jihyun know you ran away from home right now?”

“Why would she need to know that.”

“If you’re dating, she should at least know where you live, shouldn’t she.”

Wonoh looked up at Minje with a provocative gaze. A heavy sigh pressed down on his chest and escaped. His mouth tasted bitter.

“You go tell her, then. Tell her, don’t you know where Lee Eunsung’s house is? Have you ever heard of a moon village, a single-room dwelling? Tell her Lee Eunsung ran away from home so he wouldn’t get beaten to death by his alcoholic father. I can’t say it with my own mouth, so you go tell Kim Jihyun, you son of a bitch.”

Force was put into each and every syllable. They weren’t pre-written lines, so he quickly observed his expression as he spoke, and Wonoh narrowed his eyes before finally twitching, his eyebrows arching dramatically. After listening quietly, he roughly tousled his short hair as if frustrated.

“No, shit. That’s not what I meant.”

“What do you mean, that’s not it. You’re just that pissed off that I’m getting along with Jihyun, aren’t you? My hands were trembling just buying a single thing of tteokbokki, so forget about dating, I couldn’t even eat a proper meal with her, fuck. Are you satisfied?”

“……”

“You bastard. You didn’t even tell me you were entering the competition. And you’re giving me this shit just because I didn’t tell you that one little thing?”

“Shit,” Wonoh muttered a curse softly before grabbing Minje’s arm and standing up.

“I was going to tell you. I swear. It hasn’t even been that long since it came up. ……It’s been even less time since I decided.”

“Oh really?”

Minje jerked his hand away from his grasp and roughly slung his bag over his shoulder.

“It’s true! Hey, fuck, Lee Eunsung! Where are you going!”

“I’m going on a date with Kim Jihyun.”

He roughly closed the gym door without looking back.

As soon as Director Lim shouted “Cut!”, Wonoh, who was left alone inside the door, burst out laughing. Minje, his face still flushed with excitement, quickly re-entered the set. Wonoh, still not ceasing his laughter upon seeing Minje, reached out his hand.

“Ah— I was totally caught off guard.”

“Sorry. I just went off, didn’t I.”

“No, it was fun,” he said, wrapping his long arm around Minje’s shoulder. His solid upper body pressed tightly against Minje’s shoulder. Director Lim, who was watching the monitor with everyone else, got completely excited and shouted, “Bring more cameras!” He said that instead of redoing the same acting multiple times to shoot what was filmed once from different angles, they would just set up many cameras at various angles so there would be no need for reshoots. In return, it meant they could act freely in various versions.

During the setup time, Wonoh didn’t let go of the arm he had around Minje’s shoulder and whispered for a long time. His voice, half a tone higher than usual, chattered near Minje’s ear.

“Hyung. I’ll try getting angry too. I couldn’t say the line ‘Aren’t you going to spar?’ earlier, but I want to add that in. And when you say, ‘Tell Kim Jihyun!’, how about I also say, ‘You left without telling me first earlier, too!’?”

Minje’s words also became faster.

“Yeah. Should we bring up the sparring at the beginning? Before we fight, you say first, ‘Hurry up and change. Let’s spar.’ Try it like that.”

“That’s good. Kihwan hyung, can we do it like this?”

With Director Lim’s permission and free rein, the very last take escalated from shouting at each other to a light physical scuffle. In the middle of arguing, Choi Wonoh said, “So, you’re leaving without sparring with me now?!”, which made him forget it was acting and get genuinely furious. It was only later that a costume team staff member told him that the wrist Wonoh had grabbed during the acting had swelled up red.

From the third take on, Minje could guess what kind of lines Wonoh would deliver just by looking at his eyes. Even as they shouted their lines, it didn’t feel like one person was rushing ahead or falling behind; the dialogue and breathing felt like they were coming from a single person.

It was a strange experience. The catharsis he felt when everything fell perfectly into place was incredible. He thought he might have felt something similar to this when a precisely landed punch hit a shield with a ‘pow!’ sound, or when he had flawlessly executed a perfectly choreographed group dance. Thinking that far, Minje lightly shook his head from side to side.

No, this was different from that in his past life. In his past life, he had to force his whole body into the mold that the perfect four had left for just one ‘Omega’. When he managed to learn the songs and choreography, which he was doing for the first time in his life, in just three months, all he felt was a sense of relief that he could at least avoid being a burden. Even when he got used to living as Cheon Minje of Sparkle, the members had never shared this kind of experience with him.