TOPWL 108

“It was just so beautiful. The sapphire ring… it was so beautiful… I only tried it on once. I thought maybe… just maybe, if I wore it, even my rough, wrinkled hands might look a little prettier… The palace is filled with glittering things, and I— I was just old and shabby. I just wanted to try on something lovely for once… That was my mistake. I’ve reflected on it deeply. I’ll never do something like that again. I know now—jewels like that don’t suit someone like me. I was foolish, not knowing my place. Please, have pity on me. Don’t cast me aside. I’ve devoted my whole life to serving Your Highness. From the moment you were a swaddled infant, I’ve cared for you in the palace without once straying. I know nothing of the outside world. It… it terrifies me, the world… and people…”

The nanny sobbed, large tears dripping from her eyes. Yudit looked down at her and said calmly,

“I gave you a severance payment more than enough to live comfortably and hire help.”

“You know it’s not about the money. To cut all ties with money—that’s too cruel. I gave up all happiness outside the palace just to care for Your Highness. I have no family, no friends now… I have only you…”

She clung to the hem of Yudit’s trousers, weeping pitifully. Her figure was so wretched that Yudit found himself wondering if perhaps he was the one in the wrong. If even he felt this way, what about the others?

Sure enough, the people around them were already gazing at the nanny with pity. Yudit sighed and extended his hand toward her.

“Stand up. The floor is cold.”

“I won’t stand until you forgive me.”

She remained stubborn. Yudit felt a rare, dull throb at the back of his neck.

“I said—stand up.”

His tone was resolute. Reluctantly, the nanny reached out to take his hand. But just as she did, she swayed to the side as if dizzy.

Crash.

Despite Yudit pulling her upright, the nanny collapsed noisily to the floor.

“Oh dear!”

People rushed toward her. She opened her eyes with difficulty and staggered to her feet, helped up by others.

“I’m sorry, Your Highness. I was just so happy at the thought of seeing you again, I haven’t eaten a bite since last night…”

She trembled as she stood with the help of others.

“I’m sorry for showing up like this. I only… wanted to beg your forgiveness. Shameless as it is, I just wanted to see you once more. But now I see… I’m only a burden to you. I’ll be on my way.”

“It’s already getting dark—where do you plan to go?”

“I’ll hire a carriage.”

“Carriages don’t often come through this area.”

“Even so, I should leave, so that Your Highness can have peace of mind…”

“That’s quite enough.”

A sharp voice cut through the air behind the nanny. It was Selena. The nanny turned, startled.

“My lady, if I’ve disturbed you too—”

“You have. You’re playing the victim to sway others and make His Highness look like the villain.”

“T-that wasn’t my intention… I only…”

“If you truly cared for His Highness, you should have left when you were told to. Not lingered here like this.”

“But I… I only wanted to see him. He’s all I have left…”

“That’s exactly the problem. You keep speaking from your own feelings, ignoring what trouble that causes His Highness. And even now, he hasn’t uttered a word about your faults. Tell me—what noble would welcome a servant who airs their master’s personal matters in public? You should be thankful he gave you severance at all.”

The nanny bit her lip.

“T-this is between His Highness and me. With all due respect, Lady Selena, this isn’t your place to interfere.”

“Then you shouldn’t have drawn the whole room into it. You made a spectacle, and now that I speak on His Highness’s behalf, you say I shouldn’t interfere? Isn’t that rather selfish?”

“You don’t even know what kind of person His Highness is…”

“I know this much—he’s kind enough to give severance to a servant who stole from him.”

“I didn’t steal.”

“Didn’t you? I know plenty about you.”

“I don’t know you, so how would you know me?”

“That’s exactly why. I visited the prince’s residence frequently during the first competition. Every time, His Highness would personally guide me and serve tea. But to prepare the table, he had to ask you to step aside. You would scowl as you left. You would sit at the prince’s tea table, chatting away, and when he politely asked for the space, you responded with a sour face. Is there any need to know more about a servant who behaves like that?”

The nanny was caught off guard, clearly not expecting Selena to go that far. Murmurs spread among the inn’s patrons.

“You’ve been rude enough. His Highness has been more than patient. The ring was only the final straw. Even if you didn’t steal it, you’ve already done more than enough to disqualify yourself. You lived off his grace for years—how dare you show your face again, dragging down his name? Don’t you think that’s rather cunning of you?”

“I… I…”

“If you have any shame left, leave. You may take my carriage. Get off wherever you like. But never return.”

At Selena’s declaration, the nanny went pale. The gazes that once brimmed with pity now held suspicion. The nanny looked around the inn, searching, but found not a single ally. She rose shakily to her feet. When she pulled open the door, a cold wind swept in.

She stood in the doorway for a moment. But no one called out to stop her. In silence, she closed the door behind her and left.

A heavy hush fell over the inn.

It was broken first by a drunken man, cheeks flushed red with drink, who suddenly clapped his thick palms together.

Others followed.

“Bravo, young lady!”

Everyone in the inn burst into applause for Selena. She looked utterly flustered, unsure of what to do with herself in the face of such attention.

“Thank you, Selena,” Yudit said sincerely.

Selena’s face flushed bright red as she bowed her head deeply.

“Selena, are you all right?”

Yudit asked as he set a plate of food down in front of her. Her complexion had shifted from pale to bluish, then red—it was clear she wasn’t quite herself.

“Huh? Oh—yes, I’m fine.”

Yudit had planned to dine in the hall as usual to hear updates, but the attention from others had grown too intense, so he ended up retreating to Selena’s room for the meal. She barely touched the stew in front of her, occasionally glancing up at Yudit with a guilty look.

“Um… Your Highness… I’m sorry.”

“What for?”

“I think I overstepped. I criticized your nanny for speaking of your private life, and then I went and did the same…”

She must have been referring to the story about the tea. Yudit gave a gentle smile.

“It’s all right. You were standing up for me.”

“But still, I brought up something that concerns your reputation…”

“Selena. Truly, it’s fine. Honestly, I was saved thanks to you. I was in a tough spot.”

It had already been a complicated day, and when the nanny showed up, things became nearly unbearable. Selena looked at Yudit with concern.

“But Your Highness… You’ve seemed troubled since earlier.”

“Ah…”

Yudit rubbed his cheek. It felt stiff, like it had hardened. He thought he’d hidden it well, but clearly, someone close could still tell.

“It’s not because of the nanny. Nor because of you.”

Despite his assurance, Selena didn’t look entirely convinced. Eventually, Yudit realized he had to tell her the truth.

“I was thinking about that sound.”

“That sound? Oh… The one we heard outside earlier…”

“It came from beyond the mountains—where the knights were dispatched.”

“You were worried about the expedition…”

Selena spoke with sudden clarity, as if everything made sense. Yudit nodded. And yet, guilt tugged at his chest. He was concerned about the troops, of course—but more than anything, he was worried about Khalid. That realization made him feel ashamed.

A sound loud enough to travel all the way across the mountains—how large must the monster have been? Could the subjugation force handle something like that? What if Khalid was injured… or worse, killed?

Even when the nanny confronted him, his mind had been so consumed by that fear that he couldn’t think straight. It was even worse in the wake of Kanila’s death. In the end, he had needed Selena to step in.

He was truly grateful to her.

Just imagining Khalid lying pale and bleeding made Yudit’s stomach twist. If he died, would he too be reduced to a small urn of ashes? What was death? Would it mean never hearing his voice or seeing his smile again? Never feeling his touch or the warmth of his embrace?

All of it, gone—cold and lifeless.

He knew his thoughts were racing too far, too fast—but he couldn’t stop them.

“Your Highness, are you feeling ill? Your face is so pale.”

“Ah…”

Selena asked with a worried look. In that moment, something surged through Yudit’s mind like a ripple.

Could it be… that I like him?

No—impossible. Their first meeting had been with his hands around Yudit’s throat. How could anyone have feelings for a man like that?

A droplet fell onto the table.

Only then did Yudit realize—he was crying.