Chapter 10 – Why Are You Crying?

Li Tang had been preparing for this birthday party for over a week.

Even though it didn’t show on the surface, as someone from the capital city at the feet of the imperial palace, Li Tang felt a certain burden when in front of his classmates from smaller cities. Therefore, his birthday party had to be unique, it couldn’t be a letdown.

It couldn’t lose face.

Li Tang asked Auntie to find him a chef with two requirements: they had to be famous locally and could provide catering services at their location.

This usually meant finding a chef who specialized in family banquets, but Li Tang thought their hands were too rough from making mass-produced dishes. He went out of his way to contact a chef who had previously worked at a five-star hotel, purchasing an expensive set of knives as per the chef’s request, and arranging for Auntie to assist him.

The menu planning was also handled with caution. After all, there were so many people, and tastes varied widely. They should choose dishes that most people would easily accept, such as steamed crab and boiled shrimp, which were lightly flavored and emphasized freshness.

After revising the menu five or six times, it was finally settled. Just as he replied with an “okay,” Li Tang opened the menu again and looked at it for a while.

He withdrew the message he just sent and said, “Add another spicy and sour dish.”

The chef responded, “But we already have sour fish.”

Li Tang: “Change the seafood soup to spicy and sour seafood soup.”

The chef sent a voice message, “Are you sure? There’s only one soup dish, and spicy and sour soup isn’t very refreshing.”

Li Tang remembered the person sitting across from him at the cheap roadside diner at the foot of the mountain, pouring a “lethal amount” of chili peppers and vinegar onto their rice.

He also replied via voice message, “Yes, for refreshment, they can drink beverages.”

“Then it’s settled? I’ll go prepare the ingredients.”

“Okay, thank you for your hard work.”

Two days before his birthday, Li Tang suddenly realized that the party still lacked desserts. During a break between classes, he secretly browsed through public reviews on his phone.

Zhou Dongze, who sat in the back row, came over to play and patted Li Tang on the shoulder from behind, shouting near his ear, “Teacher’s coming.”

Li Tang was startled and shivered, his phone slipping from his hand, but luckily, his quickly closed thighs caught it.

Li Zichu couldn’t stop laughing. “Old Zhou, don’t tease Li Tang; he gets scared easily.”

Zhou Dongze also laughed. “Aren’t you mad at me, Li Tang? Otherwise, why don’t you scare me next time?”

Li Tang thought to himself, I’m not that childish, picking up his phone and continuing to browse.

Seeing that he was busy, the two people beside him started chatting.

They first talked about the upcoming autumn sports meet next month. These days, students buried themselves in their studies and had no interest in participating in sports meets, let alone striving for honor for their class. As the physical education representative, Zhou Dongze almost went bald worrying about motivating everyone to sign up.

Li Zichu suggested, “How about preparing some prizes for the participants?”

“In previous years, we’ve prepared them. Unlimited mineral water, free snacks, and class fund dinners.” Zhou Dongze lamented, “These small favors don’t even register to them.”

“What if we go big this time and organize a group activity for the participants?”

“Like what kind of activity?”

“Singing karaoke, watching movies, listening to musicals, playing murder mystery games… With a large number of people, we can buy group tickets. I’ll apply to Teacher Liu for funding from the class funds; it shouldn’t be a problem.”

“That’s a good idea. You go ahead and apply to the homeroom teacher, and I’ll take care of the rest.”

“OK.”

After they reached a preliminary agreement, they didn’t forget to ask for others’ opinions.

Li Zichu nudged his desk mate with his elbow. “What do you think?”

Li Tang was troubled by the scarcity of dessert shops in Xucheng and casually replied, “Not bad.”

“Then we’ll go sing karaoke.”

Li Tang, remembering the chaotic scene at the karaoke bar last time, subconsciously frowned. “…Please spare me.”

Zhou Dongze burst out laughing.

After finishing their serious discussion, they had time for gossip.

“Do you remember the incident a few days ago where two boys from Class 2 got hit by falling objects in the equipment room?”

“Yeah, did something happen after that?”

“Yes, today when I went to the office, I heard the teachers talking. One of the boys had eight stitches on his head, and the other is in the hospital with a broken bone.”

“Holy shit, that serious.”

“Mm-hmm, the parents came to the school demanding compensation and a thorough investigation.”

“What’s there to investigate? It was just old equipment. There wasn’t even a surveillance camera there. They were just unlucky.”

“You’re telling me.”

…

After they finished discussing, they asked Li Tang for his opinion.

Li Tang, who had been engrossed in his phone, hadn’t listened carefully. He held up his phone to show them. “This place looks pretty good. Have any of you eaten there?”

By the weekend, Li Tang woke up early and spent half an hour selecting clothes.

At school, he could only wear the uniform, but now that the weather had cooled down, it was once again the season for showing off various baseball jackets and leather jackets.

Carefully choosing a new outfit he had bought at a trendy brand store in the capital before coming to Xucheng, Li Tang went downstairs, where the chef had already arrived, along with the pastry chef he had hired afterward.

As soon as he got up in the morning, someone knocked on the door, and Li Tang received a huge box containing an extravagant three-tiered cartoon fondant cake. It was sent by Cao Yang, who was far away in the capital.

Initially intending to call, Li Tang remembered Li Meiqi’s warning last time and only sent Cao Yang a WeChat message expressing his thanks.

Next, he received flowers—a large bunch of roses. The card didn’t bear a name, only saying, “To my English tutor.”

Recently, only one person had frequently asked him for English tutoring.

Li Tang called Zhou Dongze to express his gratitude. “The flowers are beautiful, but shouldn’t roses be given to girls?”

“Who cares if it’s a girl or a boy when giving gifts? Just tell me if you like them or not.”

Li Tang looked down at the flowers in his arms, the vintage rose-red color with just the right saturation, the curled petals reminiscent of pages of a book burned by fire.

“…I like them.”

“So there you go.” Zhou Dongze said on the phone, “There’s a sudden emergency at home, so I won’t be able to come celebrate your birthday today. I’ll make it up to you next time.”

Li Tang said he understood, but deep down, he thought it wasn’t necessary.

Since it was called a birthday, it was the only day of the year, and it couldn’t be replaced by any other day.

Guests began arriving in the afternoon, all classmates. Li Tang told them to just bring their mouths, but several students still brought gifts—small items like books and stationery, which weren’t burdensome to either the giver or the receiver.

Before dinner, they brought the things upstairs first.

Coming out of his room, Li Tang hesitated several times in front of Zhang Zhaoyue’s tightly shut door but ultimately didn’t knock.

Two days earlier, he had asked her if she was available today, and she said she’d see how it goes. Li Tang didn’t push further and didn’t specifically mention the arrangements for his birthday day. He felt that Mom should understand what he meant—he hoped she would also participate.

Although people often said that a child’s birthday was the mother’s day of suffering, at least… she could send her blessings like everyone else, right?

May my child be healthy and happy, free from illness and disaster. Even a simple ‘Happy Birthday’ would be fine.

The chef he had carefully chosen was very efficient. By afternoon tea time, the aroma of food was already wafting from the kitchen. The pastry chef had made several plates of desserts, which the students enjoyed heartily.

Li Zichu arrived before dinner, carrying a basket of fruit in a rather old-fashioned manner.

“I saw your post on Moments. You had everything except fruit, so I bought some on the way.” Li Zichu said with a smile.

Just as Li Tang welcomed him inside, more guests arrived. It was Huo Xichen, looking somewhat gloomy, also carrying fruit and offering Li Tang a dry wish for longevity.

One might think he was celebrating his eightieth birthday.

Li Tang didn’t mind and wasn’t focused on that. He took the fruit basket and looked behind Huo Xichen. “You’re alone?”

Huo Xichen was perplexed. “Should I have come with someone?”

“Where’s Jiang Lou?”

“He didn’t say anything about coming.”

Up until the start of the feast, Jiang Lou didn’t appear.

Li Tang’s already depressed mood became even more dispirited. At the dinner table, everyone was busy eating, but he barely touched his chopsticks. Under the table, he pulled out his phone and swiped the screen repeatedly, finally sending Jiang Lou a message.

—I’m Li Tang, did you forget you were supposed to come to my house today?

He had gotten the number from Huo Xichen. Li Tang had originally wanted to add Jiang Lou on WeChat, but searching this number didn’t yield any results, so he had to send a text message.

But these days, text messages were mostly reserved for advertisements and scams. It was uncertain whether Jiang Lou would even see it.

They were all high school students, so only low-alcohol fruit wine was served on the table.

Still, too much could lead to intoxication.

Halfway through the banquet, Li Tang left the table, his steps unsteady as he headed upstairs. Leaning on the railing and climbing a few steps, a classmate shouted from downstairs, “There’s a piano here! Birthday boy, show us a tune!”

Li Tang continued walking up on his own, slowly shaking his head. “I learned when I was little, but I can’t play anymore.”

His voice was too soft, and no one heard him.

The corridor on the second floor was dark and quiet. Li Tang leaned against the wall, took a breath, and listened to the faint commotion from downstairs. It gave him the illusion of finally escaping from a world that had nothing to do with him.

It seemed that it was always like this—after paying a price for the excitement, he still felt that loneliness was better.

Perhaps this wasn’t the kind of excitement he wanted.

Without warning, the door at the end of the corridor opened, and light spilled out, illuminating the entire corridor.

Li Tang stood straight in surprise and approached. “Mom…”

Zhang Zhaoyue seemed surprised to see Li Tang at the door and smiled at him. “Why did you come upstairs? Shouldn’t you be entertaining your friends?”

“They’re having fun on their own.” Li Tang said, “Today, the kitchen prepared a lot of dishes, including some you like…”

Zhang Zhaoyue interrupted him before he could finish. “Then you guys have fun. I’ll just drink some water and go to sleep.”

She then walked to the living room on the second floor, got a drink at the water bar, and returned to her bedroom.

The door slammed shut in front of him, the light extinguished, like a candle on a cake suddenly going out.

Leaving only a wisp of smoke and nearly trembling breaths in the darkness.

Li Tang stood there motionless, not knowing how long had passed, when his phone rang in his pocket.

It was a number from the capital. Answering the call, a girl’s voice came through.

“This is Li Meiqi, Cao Yang’s girlfriend.”

“…Is there something you need?”

“Have I ever told you to stay away from Cao Yang?” Li Meiqi sounded angry on the phone. “What did you tell him? He’s been busy picking out gifts for you these past few days, ordering such an expensive cake…”

“I didn’t tell him anything.”

“You didn’t say anything and he rushed to prepare gifts for you? He’s never been so attentive to me. How can you be so shameless?”

Indeed, Li Tang thought, I am so shameless, knowing that he doesn’t remember me, yet I still keep trying to get close.

Night fell.

Around nine o’clock in the evening, Jiang Lou received a call from a local unknown number.

He answered on the third ring, staying silent and waiting for the other party to speak first.

“…Is this Jiang Lou?”

“Mm.”

“Weren’t we supposed to meet? Why, why didn’t you come?”

The resentment in the voice was evident.

Jiang Lou didn’t answer. After a moment, the other side stopped pressing.

The sound of sniffing came through the phone. “Then I’ll come to you.”

“Why come to me?”

“You didn’t come, so I’ll come to you.”

“Are you sure?” Jiang Lou asked. “You want to come to me?”

“Yes, I’m coming, I’ll come to you right now.”

Drop by drop… Finally, one landed precisely on target, covering the ant trapped in the depression. The ant barely had time to struggle before its limbs stiffened in the rapidly solidifying wax, no longer moving.

“Alright, then come.”

I’ve warned you countless times and given you opportunities.

It’s you who doesn’t cherish them.

Half an hour later, Li Tang crossed the path trampled through the bushes, walking up the muddy road, unaware that his pant legs were getting dirty.

After all, those fabricated calmness, pretended indifference, and the carefully created illusion of excitement had already been shattered.

He had become a vessel filled with anger, resentment, jealousy, and unrequited desires. Once it overflowed, everyone would come to mock him.

On this disastrous day, his seventeenth birthday.

Moving as if fleeing, Li Tang followed his memory and ran into the alley in one breath. Looking up, a figure entered his sight.

Jiang Lou stood at the door, gazing up at the night sky. Hearing the sound, he turned around unhurriedly.

Their eyes met, causing Li Tang to momentarily hold his breath. The distant neon lights reflected in Jiang Lou’s dark eyes, flickering like plunging into a deep sea.

That was a realm exclusive to Jiang Lou, isolated from the entire world.

And Li Tang lingered at the border of this realm, the unknown path ahead making him hesitate in fear.

In a daze, he didn’t even know how Jiang Lou had approached him, nor how he lifted his hand and gently brushed his fingertips under Li Tang’s eyes.

His normally deep and cold voice had become warm.

“Why are you crying?”