Chapter 65

The hospital was very quiet at night.

Only Yan Mu and Li Muhe were in the small room at the end of the hallway. A wheelchair sat in the corner. This was the only smoking area on the entire floor, and the air still carried a faint smell of smoke.

Li Muhe bought two bottles of hot cocoa from the vending machine beside the elevator, and handed one to Yan Mu.

“Thanks,” Yan Mu said as he took it, but didn’t open it. Only holding the warm bottle in his hands was enough.

Li Muhe pulled the tab open.

There wasn’t anything they absolutely had to talk about except Jiang Zhihuo.

They both knew it, so Li Muhe didn’t bother with small talk. He went straight to the point. “Xiao Huo is my younger brother.”

That one sentence made his position clear.

As an older brother—nothing more, nothing less.

Yan Mu listened carefully, not interrupting once.

“The first time I saw Xiao Huo was at the police station. He was so thin and small, covered in wounds, and he had come to report an incident. It was freezing that day; he wore so little that his lips had turned purple from the cold.”

“I don’t know how to describe that man he called a father. No, he doesn’t deserve to be called that. But these things aren’t mine to tell. Let me only say this much, alright?”

Yan Mu responded with a soft ‘mhm.’

Li Muhe continued, “When he first moved into my home, we weren’t close, yet he never showed any discomfort. I could tell he couldn’t sleep at night. It’s hard for anyone to fall asleep quickly in a new place. It takes time to adjust. He didn’t say anything, but the dark circles under his eyes gave it away. That’s exactly what makes people feel even more for him.”

“He’s the kind of person who makes you feel warm. You can say he really values little moments. He gives small gifts on every holiday, shows up unexpectedly, and stays with you when you need someone. He’s sincere, but also keeps a bit of himself to himself. He never opens up completely, and somehow he always knows exactly how close to get.”

“He is very smart, smart enough to read people’s expressions from a young age. He never said anything we don’t want to hear. Even though his grades are poor and he always seems a little out of place, no one ever dislikes him.”

Li Muhe shared story after story about Jiang Zhihuo.

Yan Mu listened intently.

The feeling wasn’t pleasant. He was hearing about a part of Jiang Zhihuo’s life he had missed, through someone else’s words.

Yet it also felt strangely comforting.

The Xiao Zhou in his memory slowly came back to life through Li Muhe’s words. It was as if time had passed and everything had grown distant, yet somehow, it also felt like none of it had ever truly gone far.

“I don’t know who Xiao Huo’s been involved with. I don’t know what he’s been doing. That’s my fault. I kept saying I was looking out for him, but in truth, it was always him taking care of my feelings.”

“He didn’t tell me, and he didn’t tell anyone. I couldn’t comfort myself, and I couldn’t bring myself to ask Xiao Huo. All I could do was call my father. But he was right, I didn’t even have the right to blame anyone.”

Yan Mu stayed quiet.

Li Muhe lowered his gaze and stared at the warm cocoa in his hands. He paused. “There’s one more thing. I think only I can say it.”

Yan Mu waited for him to go on.

“I was there when Xiao Huo differentiated into an alpha. It was painful. His face had gone pale, and he had already passed out, but he kept clutching his shoulder, calling out someone’s name over and over. It’s Qin Mu.”

Yan Mu stiffened slightly as he turned his head to look at Li Muhe.

“He rarely talked about the past, but during that time, he was really unhappy. He once went to the hospital in secret. That day, he had also been drinking, alone at a bar, so much that he was barely conscious.”

That time, Li Muhe had been the one to pick him up.

Jiang Zhihuo, already dazed from drinking, said to him, “My professor is sick. He’s been sick for a while, and I only found out by accident. I went to the hospital room today, but didn’t dare go in. I also saw Yun Xiaoxu…”

Li Muhe asked him, “Who’s the professor?”

Jiang Zhihuo shook his head, hugged the bottle, and said, “A professor is just a professor. They’re nice, but they’re not my professor…”

Li Muhe actually knew. He was talking about Father Yun and Mother Yun.

On the day of the trial, many years ago, they waited together at the courthouse entrance for a long time.

The case involved Father Yun, Mother Yun, Yun Xiaoxu, and Jiang Zhihuo. Both children and the Yun Family were innocent. The only one at fault was Jiang Zhihuo’s father.

The weather wasn’t great that day. Thick clouds filled the sky, and everything felt gloomy and heavy.

They saw a middle-aged couple supporting each other as they walked out. The woman was crying hard, and the man gently wiped away her tears.

They watched them walk farther and farther away.

The small hand holding his grew tighter and tighter, until a voice sounded. “Li-ge, let’s go.”

Jiang Zhihuo had never said a word, but Li Muhe could sense how much he missed those memories.

Qin Mu had appeared in his life during that time.

What kind of feelings did Jiang Zhihuo have for Qin Mu? What kind of emotion could make him want, no matter the cost, to carve it into his shoulder, into his very flesh and blood?

Li Muhe had thought about that question during many quiet, late nights.

He wasn’t Jiang Zhihuo, so all he could do was guess.

Back then, they were too young. Maybe that kind of feeling didn’t really count as liking someone, but there were many things he didn’t want to forget and couldn’t forget, even if he tried.

People always say it’s wrong to cling to the past.

They were right, but not completely.

For Jiang Zhihuo, being treated so cruelly by his own father at such a young age left him with no choice but to save himself. He had seen darkness, and because of that, the light that had once appeared before him was something he never wanted to forget.

Some things, some people, became more deeply etched as time passed. You didn’t want to forget them, and you couldn’t. They became one of the marks that made a person whole.

Maybe you could call it love? Or it was something even deeper than that.

In any case, it was a kind of pure emotion that no outsider could ever fully understand.

“I don’t want to ruin that purity in Xiao Huo.”

Li Muhe says, “It is clear he really likes you. That is why he tell you. He will tell you many things, though many people will not understand. So this tattoo, and this name, I will be the one to tell you. I will be the bad guy if I have to. I will not allow anyone to deny any of this, or deny the memories he holds dear.”

“I’m sorry,” Li Muhe said. “I’m being selfish.”

Yan Mu was silent for a moment. He opened the hot cocoa, took a sip with his head tilted back, then said, “Thank you for telling me. I’m really glad I got to hear this.”

Jiang Zhihuo wasn’t the only one who didn’t want to forget.

Li Muhe smiled gently, as always.

The mood was too heavy. They stayed at the end of the hallway for a while. No one wanted to bring that gloom into the hospital room.

After about twenty minutes, the wind had blown away the cloying scent of cocoa from their clothes, and they headed back to the room.

As soon as they opened the door, Li Muhe stopped in his tracks.

The hospital bed was empty!!

The clothes they brought were gone too. All that was left was a crumpled empty bag tossed on the bed.

He ran away?

Where could he go?

To Li Hao??

Yan Mu immediately tried calling Jiang Zhihuo, but no matter how many times he called, no one picked up.

Li Muhe guessed the same and decided to drive straight to the police station.

The next moment, Yan Mu’s phone rang. He didn’t check the caller ID and answered right away, but the voice on the other end wasn’t Jiang Zhihuo’s. It was Wen Da.

“Young Master Yan…” Even the final sounds of those words were trembling.

Yan Mu didn’t have time to talk. He said plainly, “If it’s nothing, I’m hanging up.”

Wen Da quickly called out to stop him, “Wait, wait, wait. Young Master Yan, I’m sorry, I was wrong!!!”

Yan Mu: “?”

After Shin left, the more Wen Da and Qu Xiao thought about it, the more off it felt. Why did Shin suddenly come over and question the two of them like that?

They must’ve fought!!

One only starts digging into who their ex was after a fight, right?!

Wen Da felt uneasy thinking about what he had said earlier. Shin’s presence was way too overpowering. He was frightened, couldn’t stay quiet, and ended up spilling everything.

After saying all that, he was worried that Young Master Yan wouldn’t be able to fix things. If the relationship fell apart, he and Qu Xiao would be the first to get killed. So before anything happened, he rushed to make a call and apologize.

“Young Master Yan… I was wrong. I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you, don’t hang up yet. Just now, Shin suddenly came to us and asked me who your white moonlight was. He was so fierce I couldn’t take it. I spilled everything. The report, the seashell, and about Yun Zhou, I told him all of it…”

Yan Mu: “……”

Hearing nothing from the other end, Wen Da said nervously, “Young Master Yan, you can kill me later, but maybe think first about how to smooth this over?”

Yan Mu: “…………”

With a dark expression, Yan Mu hung up the phone and said to Li Muhe, “Found him. He didn’t go to the police station.”

“Then where is he?” Li Muhe noticed something odd in Yan Mu’s expression. “What’s wrong with you?”

Yan Mu: “…………”

He opened his mouth with great difficulty and asked, “If I did something that might make him angry, no, something that will definitely make him angry, how should I apologize…”

Jiang Zhihuo was walking down the street alone, still a bit dazed.

Getting stabbed with a pointed weapon didn’t even leave him in a trance. He could still run two laps while being chased. But only two sentences from Wen Da had his head buzzing and his mind reeling.

The hospital wasn’t far from the bar. Around this time, traffic wasn’t bad. It took about ten minutes by taxi.

When they were dragged out of the private room and asked who Yan Mu’s white moonlight was, Wen Da and Qu Xiao had completely different expressions.

Qu Xiao didn’t know anything about it. They had only met in high school, and he had never heard of it. He turned to Wen Da with a perplexed look and asked, “What white moonlight?”

Wen Da did know, but no matter who asked that question, it definitely shouldn’t have been Shin. It was like the current partner questioning about the ex. Nothing good ever comes from that. It either ends in a fight or a breakup. What good could possibly come of it?!

Wen Da held his ground and refused to say a word, even if it killed him.

The more stubborn he got, the more curious Jiang Zhihuo became. He lifted his chin slightly toward Wen Da, eyelids drooping.

When playing the role of the aloof and cool type, Jiang Zhihuo’s existence was in full force. His usual grinning and playful expression was completely replaced by a cold, indifferent face. Every expression and movement was perfectly controlled, carrying an impressive air.

Wen Da was instantly intimidated by that look, as if he were being interrogated by Young Master Yan himself. He couldn’t keep up the act anymore and blurted everything out in one breath. “Actually, I don’t really know much. It’s just… It’s just that a long time ago, I accidentally saw something of Young Master Yan’s. Two reports and a half seashell.”

A half seashell?!

Jiang Zhihuo suddenly felt his blood freeze for a moment. His head buzzed loudly, and in an instant, countless thoughts came rushing out.

“What name was on the report?” Jiang Zhihuo asked.

Wen Da had wanted to hold out a little longer, but the moment Jiang Zhihuo gave him a glare, his mouth loosened again. “Yun… Yun Zhou.”

Only two words.

No one had said those two words in eight years.

Jiang Zhihuo wandered aimlessly down the street, unable to gather his thoughts.

He thought about so many things.

For example, there were some things he should have realized earlier. Yan Mu had the same condition, one that made even a touch painful. He should have made the connection long ago.

But at the same time, many questions surged up. He couldn’t make sense of them.

Why didn’t Yan Mu tell him?

Did Yan Mu recognize him? Even like this, he still recognized him? How did he recognize him?

Did he figure it out when he saw the tattoo?

Yan Mu likes him? He said he wants to pursue him? Why?

He was nothing like he used to be anymore…

And there were still so many other things.

For example, they disliked each other for so long, yet they still held hands, kissed, and slept in the same bed. They had stayed ambiguous for ages and went through a lot together.

Even when he occasionally thought back on these things, it was only because the person at the center of it was Yan Mu.

Now, all of a sudden, Jiang Zhihuo was being told that Yan Mu was Qin-ge, was Qin Mu, was the time and the person he had carved into his shoulder, the one he never wanted to forget—

What the hell??

There were many details at once. His brain couldn’t keep up!!

Even writing a character profile didn’t take this much brainpower!!

Aaaahhhh!

Jiang Zhihuo irritably kicked a pebble on the road. It bounced forward and almost rolled into a drain.

There shouldn’t be stones on the street!

He looked up and abruptly realized he’d unknowingly wandered into the neighborhood where Yan Mu lived. The phone in his pocket kept vibrating with over ten missed calls.

Seeing the caller ID, Jiang Zhihuo’s temper flared up again.

Damn it, why waste time thinking about these questions?!

Just ask!!

Can’t figure it out yourself, so dump it all on Yan Mu!!

Therefore, Jiang Zhihuo took a deep breath and called back aggressively. The call connected instantly. Yan Mu’s voice was anxious. “Where are you?”

Jiang Zhihuo replied calmly, “Your place.”

With Wen Da’s personality, he would definitely tell Yan Mu right after being asked. Jiang Zhihuo didn’t need to say everything again. He simply said, “Come back and explain it to me.”

Jiang Zhihuo didn’t wait long.

He stood at the door for a bit before Yan Mu hurried back.

Neither of them said a word when they met. Yan Mu opened the door, and Jiang Zhihuo walked in like he knew the place well. Yan Mu poured him a glass of water. The two sat across from each other at the dining table.

Jiang Zhihuo took a sip, crossed one leg, leaned back confidently in his chair, and said, “Speak.”

Yan Mu: “Wait a little longer.”

Jiang Zhihuo: “?”

“Wait for what?”

He barely finished asking when the doorbell rang behind them.

Yan Mu got up and opened the door. A deliveryman in a yellow uniform stood there, carrying a pretty big box.

Jiang Zhihuo: “?”

He wasn’t quite sure what the big box was for, and then he saw Yan Mu open it and start taking things out one by one…

Acupressure board, durian, washboard, keyboard, and he even grabbed the remote from the coffee table…

With all those things laid out, it was clearly a standard apology setup. The only thing missing was a proper kneel and slide¹T/N: 滑跪 (huá guì) means ‘kneel and slide,’ a dramatic gesture used in exaggerated or comedic apology scenes..

Yan Mu: “Pick one first.”

Jiang Zhihuo: “?”

That move from Yan Mu completely threw off Jiang Zhihuo’s rhythm.

?
He stared at the pile of things for a long time, then leaned back and raised one eyebrow. “What else did you prepare?”

It was only a casual question to lighten the mood, but unexpectedly, Yan Mu’s expression stiffened.

Looks like there’s more.

Jiang Zhihuo: “Show me then?”

Yan Mu: “……”

Jiang Zhihuo: “Hurry up. The sooner you finish talking, the sooner this ends.”

Yan Mu: “……”

Yan Mu: “…………”

After that, Jiang Zhihuo watched as Yan Mu pressed his lips together, took out his phone, and sent him a message.

Jiang Zhihuo looked down in confusion, and the moment he saw the screen, all the momentum he had built up collapsed on the spot. It was exactly like when he saw that damn date-planning mind map. He wanted to laugh like crazy, but the atmosphere wouldn’t let him. The corners of his mouth kept lifting, then getting forced down again. His face twitched, and even the muscles in his cheeks were trembling—

Yan Mu! Actually! Freaking made a! Outline!!

1. About when it is discovered.

(Time, place, and the course of events.)

2. About why this matter has never been spoken of all along.

(Reason, clear explanation, and key points)

3. About the white moonlight and the pursuit.

4. Apology for yesterday’s impulsive behavior.

5. Depending on the situation, whether to ask about the clubhouse matters.

P.S. Be sincere, answer every question, hold nothing back. This is very important.

The author has something to say:

Yan Mu: My cover’s blown. I’m doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed. I’m so nervous—how am I supposed to explain this… (First, open the shopping app, order all the apology items in one click. Then open the notes app and start drafting an outline…)

Please feed me some nutrient solution, darlings!!!

Thank you very much everyone for your support, I will keep working hard!

• 1
  T/N: 滑跪 (huá guì) means ‘kneel and slide,’ a dramatic gesture used in exaggerated or comedic apology scenes.