ATGRA 79

However, life never goes as planned.

“Are you sure you’re resting properly from training?”

The team doctor looked at Jung Pureum with a worried gaze. His face showed a level of pity incomparable to when his pheromones were unstable.

Problems like this sometimes occur with consistent exercise. Jung Pureum felt his right shoulder. He had even gone to a large hospital for an examination just in case, but there were no particular abnormalities.

The pain, for which even a large hospital could not find the cause, continued. It was fine all the time in his daily life, but as soon as he got into the swimming pool, his right shoulder would start to throb and ache.

With the cause unknown, both the team doctor and Jung Pureum were about to go crazy. Even when they increased the number of physical therapy sessions and were careful not to overdo it, the relief was only temporary.

As his shoulder, the most important part for a swimmer, ached, his performance naturally declined. The coach grew more and more furious as time passed, and as the start of the training camp approached, Jung Pureum also grew impatient without realizing it.

“Cases like this happen sometimes. The stress manifests physically in your body.”

“But, I don’t have any stress…”

“You might think so yourself. Still, you never know. A person’s mind is more delicate than you think, so you might be feeling pressure without even realizing it.”

Jung Pureum stared at the team doctor as if he were an alien learning the word ‘pressure’ for the first time.

The team doctor was facing Jung Pureum with an affectionate expression, as if he understood everything. It seemed he thought Jung Pureum was hurting due to the pressure of having to win a gold medal under a coach like that.

The swimming pool had been in complete chaos lately anyway. As is common in a field where class is divided by performance and all the effort built up so far can be negated by a single mistake, political maneuvering was rampant here as well.

Even Jung Pureum, who had no interest in picking sides or forming groups, was aware that the recent movements within the swimming pool were suspicious. It wasn’t just Lee Seolwoo; even Kim Yongha, who had been cut from the University Athletics Association’s side, had advised him to stay on the coach’s good side.

Kim Yongha, who had seemed to be quitting drugs for a bit, had completely devolved into an addict after being cut from the University Athletics Association’s side. It was due to the anxiety that if his records didn’t improve, he wouldn’t be able to compete in any tournament.

Talented young athletes like him all felt a similar anxiety. The one who had fostered this atmosphere was none other than the coach. He would casually run his mouth, saying there were plenty of guys like you, and it was hard not to be affected when you kept hearing things like that.

Perhaps Jung Pureum had also been consistently influenced by this situation without realizing it. And that was now manifesting as physical discomfort.

It was entirely possible, but the timing was bad. Jung Pureum slowly moved his right shoulder backward. He didn’t feel any particular pain. It was a little stiff, but not as much as when he was in the water.

“A problem like this is trickier than pheromone instability.”

“…”

“Consistent training is good, but I recommend you rest for a few more days before entering the training camp. If the coach says it’s okay, resting for at least three days…”

“That will be a little difficult.”

“I figured, right? The coach has been a bit on edge lately…”

It’s not that he’s on edge, he’s probably just filled with poison. Jung Pureum recalled the coach, who would foam at the mouth these days whenever he saw him, asking if he thought he could win a medal like that.

Whether the rumor that he had a huge fight with the university’s department head was true or not, the coach had been completely beside himself since the day he was called in by the department head.

Telling someone who was constantly making a fuss about the lack of practice, as if he couldn’t see anything, that he was going to rest for three straight days was not a good choice. Expecting rational judgment from the coach in the current situation was a foolish thing to do.

Moreover, a few of the older athletes who learned that the department head was against the coach stealthily hung around him, grating on the coach’s nerves in an attempt to get the short-distance qualification. Because of the guys who couldn’t let go of their greed even though they knew they wouldn’t hear anything good, the coach’s loud shouting was a constant background music at the swimming pool.

Jung Pureum ran a hand through his hair, from which water was dripping. There was less than half a year left until the Olympics. Once he entered the training camp, half a year would pass by quickly.

After entering the training camp, he wouldn’t be able to move around as freely as he did now, and since he wouldn’t be going home, he wouldn’t be able to meet Moon Yeonghwa. Jung Pureum was worried that Moon Yeonghwa might change his attitude again during that time.

After Minjun TV’s attack, our clinic went into a major renovation to change the security company. While changing the security company, we also decided to fix the interior, hire more contract employees, and create a break period.

Moon Yeonghwa worked really busily even after that. The clinic was actually busy, and keeping his body busy was the best way to avoid the low-self-esteem thought that Jung Pureum had gotten hurt because of him.

As Jung Pureum also had to digest an unreasonable amount of training, the frequency of their meetings noticeably decreased. It was the sorrow of a busy modern person.

Every time they managed to see each other, Moon Yeonghwa would wear an awkward expression. Each time, Jung Pureum would inwardly tremble, afraid that words like, ‘See, even if you win a medal, you and I won’t work out,’ would come out of Moon Yeonghwa’s mouth.

He had heard Moon Yeonghwa say he liked him, but his one-sided love had been too long to be sure of his affection.

Jung Pureum left the infirmary and warmed up again. After some light stretching, he submerged his body in the swimming pool, and the lukewarm chlorinated water felt like it was waking him up a bit.

If he finds out my shoulder hurts, he’ll definitely change his attitude this time.

Jung Pureum was anxious about such things. It was easy for him to give Moon Yeonghwa reassurance, but ironically, it was difficult for Moon Yeonghwa to give him reassurance. This was largely due to Moon Yeonghwa’s past karma.

What if hyung doesn’t see me as a romantic interest again…

Even the dull-witted Jung Pureum couldn’t help but feel anxious when he had that thought.

“Jung Pureum!”

At that moment, the coach standing outside the water called out Jung Pureum’s name irritably. The sharp and rough shout makes me anxious… However, the coach had no interest in Jung Pureum’s psychological state.

“Move faster! At this rate, you won’t even pass the preliminaries in the short-distance event, let alone win a medal!”

Jung Pureum ignored his aching shoulder and swung his arms to pick up speed. The uncomfortable sensation continued, but there was nothing he could do but endure it.

Something is strange with Jung Pureum.

“The clinic feels empty these days.”

“It does, doesn’t it? Because Pureum is busy. You know what they say, you don’t notice a presence until it’s gone.”

“He’s a national athlete, what can you do. The Olympics are so important.”

I let the conversation between Ms. Kim Miyoung and Nam Jungyoon go in one ear and out the other. They were right. Jung Pureum is really, really, incredibly, so busy with training these days.

Not only did he leave at the crack of dawn, but sometimes he seemed to be stuck at the swimming pool even after I had left work. When the guy who had frequently been waiting for me in front of the apartment building wasn’t there, my heart would feel empty without me realizing it.

Let’s not be fooled by the familiar Jung Pureum and forget that he is a national athlete. No matter how much I tried to take that fact to heart, my head understood it, but there were many parts that my heart couldn’t accept.

First, Jung Pureum came to meet me yesterday, but there wasn’t even a single one of his usual hugs.

Amazing! The other person was Jung Pureum, yet he didn’t hug me. On top of that, he had a face that seemed deep in thought. I asked him if he had any worries, but Jung Pureum, of course, just shook his head.

Second, Jung Pureum is being overly conscious of my mood.

It’s not new for him to be mindful of my mood. Jung Pureum has a meticulous personality, so he tends to look after those around him, not just me. However, it has been a bit severe recently. As if he were a dog afraid of being abandoned by its owner, wasn’t he asking all sorts of psychological test-like questions?

‘Hyung, what if I wasn’t this good-looking…’

‘What’s with that comment, as if you suddenly realized objectively that you’re handsome?’

‘Then you wouldn’t have even had the slightest bit of interest in me, right?’

‘You’re turning me into a lookist out of the blue.’

If he were a little shorter, if his body wasn’t like it is now… Citing all sorts of reasons, Jung Pureum asked, Would you still like me even with those conditions?

If it had been once or twice, I would have thought, Is this some psychological test that’s trending on the internet these days? but at that point, even I, whose nickname is NMS, got a feeling. A feeling that something was wrong.

Finally, Jung Pureum’s subtly unstable pheromones put a period at the end of this suspicion of mine. His pheromones have been particularly strong recently, as if his rut cycle was approaching.

It didn’t seem unstable enough to be a problem, but as someone who had once chosen to return to my family home because of Jung Pureum’s pheromone instability, I couldn’t help but be concerned about his condition.

However, I just couldn’t bring myself to ask, ‘Are you perhaps going into rut soon?’ If I asked that, it would really seem like I only wanted his body! What if he wasn’t thinking anything of the sort, and I came off as someone trying to pounce on him according to his cycle.

Because of that, time passed without me being able to properly ask about Jung Pureum’s condition. I started to feel anxious, wondering if Jung Pureum might really be going through a rut cycle.

“Jungyoon.”

“I’m busy right now, sunbae.”

“I saw you drinking Job’s tears tea with Ms. Kim Miyoung just now, so what’s keeping you busy?”

“You’re going to ask another weird question, aren’t you? After that question about what I think love is, I’ve decided not to answer your questions seriously anymore.”

“It’s not like that. Do you think all I do is talk nonsense all day?”

“You do talk nonsense most of the time.”

“Ahem!”

The childish bickering resumed. When I’m with Nam Jungyoon, I feel like my mental age regresses. I never fought like a kid like this even in university.

“I was just going to ask about the rut cycle, that’s all.”

“Rut? Because of Pureum?”

“…”

“Aha, because the kid won’t tell you his cycle?”

Nam Jungyoon, who had been fuming along with me, changed his expression in an instant. Seeing his grinning face, I could understand why Lee Seolwoo hadn’t given Nam Jungyoon a second glance.

What good is it to look like a cool, handsome man when his personality is so weird… I cursed Nam Jungyoon a little in my head. Still, he’s my one and only vice-director, so I have to endure it.