NUTMEG 25

Trapped in a pair of strong arms, Minje lay awake for a couple of hours. As soon as it was completely light out, he woke Wonoh in a small voice. His own throat was terribly raw. The memory of the moans he had mindlessly let out immediately came to mind, and Minje squeezed his eyes shut and then opened them.

I want to die.

He would have preferred not to remember anything at all, but from the moment he sensed something was off, he had gradually started to come to his senses, and now quite a few memories were surfacing intermittently.

He was sure he had been dreaming about his Sparkle days, but in the memory, he was kissing Wonoh and, not satisfied with that, even grinding his hips on top of him.

I’m going crazy…

How did things end up like that?

He had clearly been drunk, and somehow managed to get home. He must have been too drunk to think straight and ended up using the same bed as Wonoh. His body probably reacted to the pheromones Wonoh released in his sleep. He tried to rationalize it as an unavoidable accident, but… of all people, to do that to Wonoh. The fact that he reacted to any alpha pheromone made him feel like absolute trash.

Could he have found out I’m an omega because of this? He was anxious because his memories of what he said while drunk were so fragmented. No. If he had found out he was an omega, there was no way he would have been so casual when he woke up in the middle of the night.

There was something else he was worried about.

What if Wonoh hates me now?

He had definitely said, “Hyung, you really shouldn’t drink.” A guy who gets hard and pounces on someone as a drunken habit. Even he would hate that. He couldn’t tell him it was because of the pheromones, and the frustration of being treated as a guy with promiscuous drinking habits was suffocating.

The thought that Wonoh would despise him like he used to made his chest ache and feel miserable, as if it were shriveling up. He wouldn’t mind if Wonoh thought of him as a pervert with strange drinking habits, as long as he would just keep treating him like a friend. His mind was so full of such thoughts that he couldn’t possibly sleep peacefully. Like a fool, Minje just bit his lower lip and stared at Wonoh’s sleeping face all through the dawn.

“Uungh…”

Wonoh let out a low moan and moved his body as if stretching. Wonoh’s bare lower body brushed past his own naked leg. For a moment, a scene from last night’s lovemaking flashed in his mind, and his lower abdomen tensed up.

Slowly sitting up, Wonoh looked down at his own naked body once, then looked at Minje. Minje was still wearing Wonoh’s t-shirt and underwear. He hadn’t been able to get out because Wonoh had been holding him so tightly in his sleep. He hadn’t done it on purpose, but he suddenly felt like an utterly shameless person. He felt like he had to make some kind of excuse, and his face turned bright red as he gaped, but Wonoh just smiled slightly, ruffled Minje’s hair once, and got out of bed.

Minje was a little dazed by his action. He had expected him to start questioning him as soon as he woke up, but unexpectedly, his expression and actions felt too… gentle. Why isn’t he asking anything? Does he want to pretend it never happened? It was understandable to think so. Who in their right mind would want to sleep with a big guy like him, who wasn’t even an omega in heat? It would be a relief for both him and Wonoh if it could be an event that never happened, but strangely, his chest felt tight.

Wonoh picked up the t-shirt that had fallen on the floor and put it on. As he threaded his arms through the sleeves one by one and pulled it over his head, his scapulae and back muscles moved in perfect unison. Leaning against the bed, Minje watched with a dazed gaze.

It was strange how a body he had seen countless times didn’t look ordinary anymore just because they had slept together once. He already knew he had a good body. Watching the muscles of his small butt hollow out as he walked reminded him of his abs, glistening with sweat.

“Hyung.”

“Huh?”

Wonoh, who was rummaging through his sports bag for a spare pair of underwear, spoke up casually. Minje flinched, thinking he’d been caught secretly staring.

“Do you do that often when you’re drunk?”

“Uh…?”

He couldn’t say anything, just wiggled his toes, afraid that if he asked, ‘Do what often? Sex?’ it would be him confirming it as fact.

“You don’t look the type, but you seemed really used to it. Sex.”

Minje’s face flared up again, whoosh, as he looked at Wonoh’s smiling face as he turned around. Far from wanting to pretend it never happened, it seemed he was planning to address it properly. Feeling guilty, Minje’s head naturally bowed. Wonoh sat on the edge of the bed, smiling cheerfully.

“I found that really hot.”

“Stop it, Choi Wonoh…”

What is this situation? Is he trying to tease me? Minje scooted his butt, trying to get away from Wonoh. But Wonoh didn’t seem to have any such intention; he picked up his phone, which he had placed on the corner of the bedside table, and for a while, he checked a few messages and even replied. Minje anxiously glanced at his face. As long as he didn’t hate him, anything else didn’t matter, but…

“Are you gay, hyung?”

Wonoh asked without taking his eyes off his phone.

“…No.”

For a moment, he was almost at a loss for words. As it turned out, he’d only ever had experiences with men in both his past and present lives, but he could declare that he had never seen a man as a romantic partner. …Probably.

“Then, do you like me?”

“Huh?” he asked back in a stupid voice. Wonoh’s tone was as casual as if he were asking about the dinner menu. His Adam’s apple bobbed unnecessarily, and he became tense.

“It’s not like that…”

“It’s not? Not even as a friend?”

A crookedly raised eyebrow was directed at Minje. Minje was a little flustered. When he asked if he liked him, he had naturally assumed he was asking about him as a romantic partner. Had he jumped to conclusions on his own again?

“I do like you. As a friend.”

“Okay,” Wonoh said, smiling in satisfaction.

Wonoh’s lips curled up as he scanned the man who had been keeping his distance, toes clenched tight. Seeing Minje’s bare legs in his own long boxer briefs reawakened the sensations of the early morning, and his lower abdomen grew languid.

To Wonoh, sexual contact, from kissing to petting, was similar to playing a mobile game to kill time. They were both done for mutual pleasure, so if you’re going to do it, make sure it feels good, and if not, just press the exit button cleanly. He wasn’t particularly interested in things like love or relationships, so he preferred not to get entangled in messy emotions.

In that sense, it was surprising that he felt ambivalent about Minje’s face, which seemed to have ‘total mistake’ written all over it. He liked it and disliked it at the same time. He liked that there were no messy feelings involved, but it was annoying that he still wanted to vaguely pretend not to know. If I hadn’t brought it up, wouldn’t he have just pretended it never happened?

Wonoh looked at Cheon Minje’s face, who was stealing glances at him, watching his reaction. The incredibly lewd face from yesterday was completely gone, replaced by his usual expression. But I want to see that face more.

Wonoh deliberately raised his long arm and swept it up the inside of Minje’s thigh. The smooth skin against his palm brought back yesterday’s memories. It was quite funny how he was tensing up, putting all his strength into his thighs.

“Hyung. You wanna sleep together like this sometimes?”

2.

“Heeok!”

Waking up with his face drenched in sweat, Im Kihwan let out a sigh of relief only after confirming that all his fingers and toes moved as he willed them to, and wiped his face with his pan-lid-sized hand.

“Hah, shit… How many times has this been?”

Tugging off his soaked gray t-shirt, Kihwan touched his pale face.

Lately, he had been getting sleep paralysis all the time.

At first, his whole body would just be unable to move, as if tied up, but then he would be released. But about two weeks ago… Yeah, it was definitely the night Choi Wonoh got hurt. That night, he kept hearing a shrill moan from somewhere as he slept. It was a very indecent, vivid sound, as if someone had put on an AV. At first, he thought the hot-blooded twenty-somethings in the next room were jacking off while watching some visual material.

Who would have thought that would be the precursor to sleep paralysis. It was when he was trying to get up to yell at the damn bastards to knock it off and go to sleep. His entire body was stuck to the bed, unable to move. Sleep paralysis. What, so were those moans just a dream?

Just then, he got the strange feeling that someone was watching him. He scanned the room, rolling his eyes, the only part of his body he could move at will, when he saw some black form below his legs… Aaaack!

Thinking about it now gave him goosebumps all over his body again.

The black ghost that appeared from that day on was determined to pounce on Kihwan, suck his dick, get him hard, and then stick Kihwan’s dick into its own most private place and grind on it.

…He really didn’t want to admit it, but the feeling of being taken while lying there unable to move wasn’t as bad as he thought…. No, it was pretty good…. No, fuck. It felt so damn good that he let it continue until he came, and it just got bolder and bolder until last night, it finally appeared with the face of his first love.

“Haaaaaaah…”

Kihwan threw off his soaked gray underwear as well and quickly washed his whole body in the bathroom attached to his room. Ah, what a relief it was to have an en-suite bathroom. If he’d gone out in this state and run into those twenty-something kids.

“Euhhh!”

Kihwan shivered all over for a different reason than before.

After having this strange gho— ghostly wet dream —the assistant director had told him the term— for the first time, he had confided in the assistant director, only to be laughed at mercilessly. Since then, Kihwan hadn’t breathed a word about the ghostly wet dreams to anyone else. He was always going on about ghosts, so had a ghost finally descended upon him? That assistant director bastard… you’re really going to die by my hands one day….

Anyway, if the kids who were still wet behind the ears found out, he would surely be teased and tormented for the rest of the shoot. So, to maintain his dignity as a director —whether it had ever existed was a separate issue— Kihwan looked in the mirror, put on his horn-rimmed glasses, and straightened his clothes.

Hearing chatter from outside, it seemed Yeonja sunbae and the kids were out having breakfast. Kihwan cleared his throat unnecessarily, ahem, ahem, and left his room.

“Good morning.”

“Yo.”

“Ah, did you sleep well?”

“Good morning, Director Im.”

The bastard who gave the short “Yo” was, of course, Choi Wonoh. Unlike himself, whose puffy face and dark circles never disappeared no matter how much he slept now that he was over thirty, these guys’ skin was somehow smooth and glowing every day, even amidst their grueling schedule. Are those two sharing something good without me?

Feeling needlessly peeved, he pretended it was an accident and bumped Choi Wonoh’s small, annoying head as he passed. Immediately, a fist flew into his back, thwack. Oof, shit. His punches had gotten even harder now that he was learning boxing. Rubbing the spot where Choi Wonoh had hit him, Kihwan stood in the kitchen, toasted four slices of bread, stacked them on a plastic plate, and sat down.

“Choi Wonoh, pass me the milk.”

“Don’t have hands?”

“…Minje, pass me the jam.”

“Here you go.”

Unlike someone who glared at him for asking for the milk right next to him, the sunshine-like Minje immediately handed over the strawberry jam. Then he even passed him the milk carton next to Wonoh. Aww, what a good kid. His face naturally softened.

“Why do you keep grinning while looking at Minje hyung’s face?”

Did this bastard eat something wrong? Picking a fight first thing in the morning. Kihwan stopped slathering strawberry jam on a slice of bread and whipped his head toward Choi Wonoh.

“You take a look at Minje’s face too. See if you don’t smile. He’s different from some people.”

“Hmm.”

Choi Wonoh stared intently at Minje’s face as if to see for himself. Minje froze with a flustered expression. Aww. That crazy bastard. If he glared at me like that, even my knees would go weak. But then, wasn’t he suddenly lifting the corners of his mouth into a grin?

“You’re right, though.”

“…”

Did he eat something wrong? Kihwan stared, his thick, caterpillar-like eyebrows instantly furrowing. Yeonja sunbae smiled and offered a peaceful observation, “You two are still getting along so well.” Getting along well… isn’t Minje being blackmailed or something? Minje, at a loss, just bowed his head low. Tsk, tsk…

“Director Im, is toast enough for breakfast? We have leftover pig’s trotters from yesterday, why don’t you have some of that too.”

“Ah, right. There were leftover pig’s trotters.”

Yesterday was a rare night when all four of them were present. He and Minje were usually at the shared house every day, while Wonoh, who had a busy schedule, and Yeonja sunbae, who preferred to rest comfortably at her home in Seoul, dropped by the house intermittently. Minje had said he was hungry, so they played ladder-climbing to decide who would buy a late-night snack, and he ended up being the one.

But then Choi Wonoh took two bites and put down his chopsticks, saying his face would get puffy. Following his lead, Minje also put down his utensils —Yeonja sunbae had already picked at only the green onions in the scallion pancake and gone to her room before that— and the entire large set of pig’s trotters was left over.

Having been nicely played by the actor punks again, Kihwan burst with indignation. You bastards, if you’re going to eat like this, don’t say you’re hungry! In the end, he was the one who bought it with his own money and ate alone. Suddenly thinking about it made him furious all over again.