CTS 38

His fingers throbbed with a sharp, piercing pain.

Shen Mo couldn’t endure it. The pain dragged him out of unconsciousness. He opened his eyes in a daze and was greeted by a world of stark whiteness. White walls, white sheets, white bandages. He stared blankly for a while before realizing he was in a hospital. The memories from before he lost consciousness came rushing back, and his body instinctively curled into itself.

He had been kidnapped on his way home. The abandoned warehouse had reeked of mold. Endless beatings and torment made time stretch unbearably long. His head had been pressed against the floor as he watched the sky darken through a cobweb-covered window, then slowly brighten again from the pitch black.

Even in his muddled state, he kept calling Zhou Yang’s name over and over.

But that man never came to save him.

“Zhou Yang…”

Shen Mo shivered under the blanket and whispered the name again without realizing. His right hand was wrapped in thick gauze, the pain so intense it felt like he might lose all feeling. He remembered the scarred man stepping on each of his fingers one by one, laughing as he said Zhou Yang would never show up.

He had gone abroad with his childhood sweetheart. No matter how many times Shen Mo called, no one picked up.

The sound of his fingers being crushed still echoed in his ears. Shen Mo closed his eyes, but the sound shifted into something else. The sound of a door opening.

Someone entered the room.

Shen Mo thought it was Zhou Yang. He lifted his head, only to see an unfamiliar face. His heart sank. He couldn’t say what emotion that was, only that the fear inside him suddenly faded.

What could be more frightening than what he had just been through?

The man was young, pale, and handsome. His expression was cold, like a winter night. He looked Shen Mo over with a critical gaze and said, “You’re awake.”

Shen Mo didn’t respond.

The man went on. “The doctor said you’re out of danger. Only your right hand is seriously injured. You might have some lasting effects.”

Shen Mo finally reacted. His lips moved, but instead of asking about his hand, he whispered two words.

“Zhou Yang…”

The man’s eyes grew even colder. “Zhou Yang is abroad. He’s with my sister.”

He paused before adding, “My sister is Ji An’an.”

Shen Mo instantly understood. She was the childhood sweetheart Zhou Yang had always been close with. That meant this man… must be her brother. He couldn’t help but glance up at him again.

The man was quietly watching him too.

“I forgot to introduce myself,” he said, adjusting his tie. “My surname is Ji. Ji Mingxuan.”

—

Shen Mo had awoken from a long, heavy dream.

The sun was already close to setting, and the remaining light of the evening sun cast a warm glow over him. He had taken a nap on the grass at the park, and now his hair and clothes were speckled with blades of grass, making him look a bit ridiculous. Passersby noticed and gave him kind smiles. Shen Mo didn’t mind. He smiled back, stood up, and picked up the sketchpad he had left on the ground.

He had picked up drawing again a few years ago, learning to use his left hand bit by bit. Though he hadn’t regained his former skill, he was satisfied with the progress he had made. He had originally come out today to sketch from life, but the sunlight had been too comfortable, and he had dozed off without meaning to. He hadn’t expected to dream about things from so long ago.

After packing up his materials, Shen Mo slung his backpack over one shoulder and headed quickly out of the park. He had a small studio space over on Yongning Road, a property that Ji Mingxuan had transferred to him after their breakup. He had renovated it a little and opened a modest art studio. Business wasn’t booming, but it was enough to make ends meet.

Because of the evening rush hour, traffic was a bit congested. By the time Shen Mo returned to the studio, night had completely fallen. He had hired a young girl to help manage the place. When she saw him come in, Yang Yue puffed her cheeks in mock annoyance and said, “Boss, you snuck off to slack again.”

Shen Mo had a mild temper. While tidying his things, he said, “Sorry, I came back late. Did I make you miss your date? You can head off now.”

Yang Yue had taken the job right out of college, and after a few years working together, she and Shen Mo had grown familiar with each other. As she quickly touched up her makeup, she asked, “Boss, what are you having for dinner? Don’t tell me you’re ordering takeout again.”

“I am.”

“Let me guess. Curry rice again?”

Shen Mo responded again with a soft “Yes,” and added, “I like curry.”

“No one likes it enough to eat it every day.” Yang Yue set down her compact and spoke with the tone of someone offering life advice. “Boss, you’re thirty now. Isn’t it time you got a girlfriend?”

Shen Mo paused for a second. “I just turned twenty-nine after the New Year.”

But to bright-eyed girls like Yang Yue, was there really a difference between twenty-nine and thirty?

“Twenty-nine is still an old man,” Yang Yue said as she picked up her eyebrow pencil and brushed her brows lightly. “The older you get, the less appealing you are on the dating market.”

Shen Mo said, “I haven’t met the right person.”

“Want me to introduce you to someone? I’ve got a college friend..”

“No no,” Shen Mo said quickly, cutting her off.

“I’ve worked here for almost three years and I’ve never seen you date anyone,” Yang Yue suddenly leaned in closer, narrowing her eyes at him. “Boss, don’t tell me there’s someone in your heart.”

She had just finished drawing her brows. The two arches were dark and neat, like ink strokes.

Shen Mo blanked out for a moment and couldn’t answer.

Yang Yue was the nosy type, and immediately perked up with interest. “Is it your first love? A secret crush? Someone you’ve been chasing for years?”

Shen Mo thought about the dream he had not long ago. His heart gave a faint thump. But he had learned how to keep his emotions in check. His expression stayed calm.

“No,” he said. And as if afraid she wouldn’t believe him, or perhaps afraid that he himself wouldn’t believe it, he repeated, “There’s no such person.”