CEL 46

What exactly was Jaeha thinking?

If thoughts spilled out when a person’s skull split apart, he might have wanted to dismantle his head at least once.

Well… maybe. No, could that really happen?

He had ‎a perfectly fine studio nearby, yet Han Hamin crouched in the cramped driver’s seat, his mood unsettled. Few people passed this place, yet the act itself leaned close to crime.

He recalled Jaeha’s voice, his breath tickling his nape as he whispered into his ear.

‘I want to try it in the car.’

What kind of face had he shown when he heard that? Had his clouded eyes stared toward a nonexistent distant mountain?

He nearly cursed after he heard such a request he had never even imagined. But he kept repeating to himself that Han Jaeha was still twenty-one, still a kid, and he endured.

Even now he did not understand why they had to do this here, leaving behind a proper house. This really felt wasteful and irrational.

Han Jaeha seemed to grow sly little by little. He must have known exactly when Hamin weakened. Otherwise, how could he throw out such ridiculous demands at perfect timing every time?

Hamin watched him flick open his shirt buttons. Whatever lay inside him, Hamin’s voice sounded like he had already surrendered.

“Don’t strip all the way.”

“Even without saying that, it’s already up.” Bastard.

Hamin pulled the passenger seat back, but the space remained tight, so Han Jaeha’s body folded in an awkward posture. Only his belt buckle was undone, yet he was already sucking on Hamin’s chest. Ridiculous.

“Why suck there?”

“You like it.”

“Me?”

Hamin’s stare seemed to suggest “You must be the one who likes it.” Han Jaeha snorted, then bit his nipple hard enough to sting. Hamin’s face stiffened from discomfort, but then the motion shifted into a ticklish rub, he was uncertain whether it even counted as biting.

His body, used only to strong stimulus, reacted strangely when Jaeha suddenly was gentle. It felt like dogtail grass brushing skin, his muscles kept tightening.

His shoulders jerked again and again. Unable to endure, he spoke.

“…Stop that.”

“What?”

“Don’t talk while holding it in your mouth.”

He pointed out the manners of speaking with someone’s nipple between teeth. Han Jaeha answered with silence.

“I said stop, it tickles.”

“Does it really tickle?”

“Yeah, it tickles.”

“But you’re hard.”

“That was from the start….”

Hamin’s indifferent reply halted.

Did it stand from the beginning?

Shocked by the crime he had never even thought of committing, Seo Hamin paid no attention to his own body. He could not recall precisely, yet he felt certain it had not stood from the start.

Then, was it really because of this?

He was speechless and he looked down at his flat chest. The heat had faded, and the nipple gleamed with spit.

“Sunbae likes this.”

He sounded so certain and smug which only irritated him. His eyes narrowed into a glare, while Jaeha, unlike him, smiled with crescent eyes and whispered again.

Jeans slid down slowly. Hos hands moved with cautious care, perhaps worried the fabric might scrape Hamin’s skin. Jaeha pressed firmly along the back of Hamin’s thigh as he knead them, then lifted the calf onto his shoulder.

“Is it hard?”

“I can endure.”

His eyes landed on him. The glasslike pupils drained the moisture from his mouth.

He wanted to close his eyes, yet also wanted to keep them open. He wanted to escape discomfort and this place, yet even so, he wanted Jaeha near. Thought he could not even understand himself.

Jaeha kept their gaze on him and slowly moved his hips back and forth.

“Does it hurt like this?”

That excessive caution made Hamin nod awkwardly. He did not want those thoughts read.

Jaeha tilted his head as he watched Hamin’s stiffening expression.

“Really okay?”

“Okay.”

The doubt lingered on his face. Yet as Hamin repeated it again, Jaeha reluctantly nodded.

He pulled a condom from his pocket, tore it open with his teeth. The way he sheath the obscene thing with practiced ease made Hamin laugh. A child mimicking an adult.

Jaeha, who was puzzled by that sudden laugh, whispered.

“If it hurts, say it.”

“If I say it?”

“I’ll kiss you.”

The reckless promise of blocking his mouth contrasted with the unhurried entry of his cock.

A tight sensation filled his inside. That narrow place, hard to grow used to, stretched and strained. Yet Jaeha also looked burdened, his lips sealed tight. Hamin lifted his hand and brushed back the damp hair clinging to Jaeha’s forehead. Honey-brown eyes softened gently.

“Not hair. Touch my face.”

“Are you a kid?”

Hamin tapped his cheek with a finger. Jaeha rubbed his face against it like ‎ satiated cat, then pushed his cock deeper with small thrusts.

Hamin placed both hands on his own stomach, fearing his nails might dig into Jaeha if he stayed still. Jaeha’s gaze, which had been looking down, found him again.

“Does it hurt?”

“Not pain. Just do it.”

Yet Jaeha averted his eyes. There was no room left for negotiation.

At this pace, it could last all day. After a brief thought, Hamin pushed Jaeha’s broad chest. He didn’t use force but Jaeha stopped. After hesitating, he pulled out the half-buried cock in one swift motion. His face looked regretful, yet he didn’t hesitate.

“…Should we go in?”

Hamin grabbed Jaeha’s shoulder, blocking his hand from reaching their jeans. The cramped car left little space, and only after much shifting and straining did they finally trade places.

Now Jaeha lay beneath, he was confused.

“What are you doing?”

“What you wanted.”

Hamin sat astride those hard thighs like a chair, he looked down at the still-hard cock. He cautiously guided the tip to his entrance, then lowered himself. He immediately felt his insides filled, stretched to the limit.

Isn’t this too deep?

“Hhh…”

He felt his bottom might split open. He looked down at his stomach at his stomach and saw it bulge slightly.

He forced himself down. He thought it must have been nearly all in, yet the swollen cock continued driving further.

The air in the car, which felt pleasant earlier, was now stifling and hot.

“Hahh.”

Hamik ignored the trembling of his body and pushed himself fully down. It all went in, it felt like carrying a giant serpent inside. Disturbed, he ran his palm over his belly, when he heard faint hissing sound below.

He looked toward the source. Jaeha’s mouth gaped.

“Why are you doing this to me?”

“What?”

“You want to see me lose my mind.”

“The crazy one’s me.”

He had eagerly joined in, he thought even if caught red-handed, no excuse would stand. Gloom filled him as he looked at his own belly, then lowered his body over Jaeha’s. The narrow car forced him into this posture.

He slightly raised his hips, then sat down again. The movement was small, yet it hit the exact spot, pulling rough breaths from him.

“Hhh…”

The condom’s lubricant made a wet squelch. In the unusually silent car, only his moans and the sound of flesh meeting flesh echoed. His face flushed. He buried it in Jaeha’s broad shoulder and rolled his hips.

“Mm, ahh…”

“…Are you really Seo Hamin?

“Age, heh. Difference, how many years… how dare you … call Seo Hamin.”

“Hearing you say that, it really is Sunbae.”

Kisses trailed over his temple while a hand patted his back. The rhythm quickened. For Hamin it felt heavy, but seeing Jaeha’s calm face, like he watching a performance, stoked his temper.

Fortunately, the harder the movements, the deeper the lines carved between Jaeha’s brows. With a strained face, he pressed a kiss to Hamin’s lips and murmured.

“Can I do it?”

“Uh… mm.”

“You answered, right?”

Between groan and word, Jaeha caught enough. His hands gripped Hamin’s hips, then thrust with force unlike before.

“Haah!”

“More, Jaeha, do it.”

“Mm, ahh!”

“Yeah? I said I like it.”

His stomach felt wrecked, his vision kept blurring. Through that wavering world, he met Jaeha’s desperate eyes. That pleading look made Hamin tighten below.

“…Jaeha.”

It sounded like he was pleading. A gentle voice he had never known he could have. Even his own ears startled at the overly heated sound. Han Jaeha caught it, and those honey-colored pupils glittered as though they were packed with starlight.

“Slowly, hh… slow down.”

“Yeah. I will.”

Yet his hips already continued pounding him hard. Hamin was dumbfounded. He only chose to hook arms behind Jaeha’s neck and pull him close. He could not say he had not expected it.

“Sunbae, you know?”

“Hhh, what?

“Feels like someone’s over there.”

He tried to turn his head up, but a big palm stopped him. His heard pounded with a different meaning than before. While he sucked in breath, Jaeha dragged his tongue along the rim of his ear and whispered.

“If you make noise, they might hear outside.”

The teasing tone sounded almost like roleplay. He bit Jaeha’s shoulder to stifle moans. Few people passed here, but near quitting hour, someone stepping in would not be strange.

His chest thundered so loud his mind clouded. Unable to relax, he tensed every muscle, and the outline of that thick cock grew vivid.

“Sunbae, it’s too tight.”

“Mmhp.”

His teeth clenched the fabric which made his moans muffled. Jaeha chuckled as he smoothed Hamin’s hair.

“I’m kidding. Let go, or your teeth will break.”

“Worry about your shoulder.”

He snapped back, then sank his teeth again.

“If you bite, do it harder. Leave a mark.”

Instead of words, Hamin ground his hips in protest. That made Jaeha throw off his leisure, thrusting with fierce rhythm.

Heat rammed inside, tearing through his guts. Saliva pooled in his mouth, and when he lifted his head, the spot he had bitten already glistened wet.

When their eyes met, their lips collided and neither could say who moved first. Both closed their eyes as their tongues tangled in a sticky mess. Hamin’s tongue tip brushed the roof of his mouth, and he couldn’t contain the excited sounds that leaked out of his mouth.

His cock, hard since earlier, rubbed raw against fabric until it flushed red. He thought he should have worn a condom too, but it’s too late now.

“Feels good…”

“Hhh, ahh…”

“So good.”

He didn’t know if that meant him or just the act. Reason leaned toward the latter, yet imagining the former made his chest swell. He hated any gap, so he cupped Jaeha’s head in both palms, dragging him close.

His nerves wore thin, raw like frayed string. He felt he would spill with one more touch. Jaeha seemed the same as he hips moved quickly. His gasping breath scraped Hamin’s ear, leaving him dazed.

Mist coated the windows. From outside, anyone could guess what was happening.

At that instant, Hamin unconsciously murmured.

“…Hey.”

“Hm? I ddn’t hear.”

“This, first time.” Short words, heavy meaning.

First sex bright enough to make stars pop before his eyes. First time his spine tingled while committing crime. First walk on a path with a cliff at the end.

Jaeha’s eyes flew wide, then narrowed again. Hamin felt him twitch inside him, and at the same time, white seed spurted out of his own cock.

Jaeha’s pupils trembled. His gaze seemed like he wanted to speak. Hamin closed his eyes.

Cowardly words, yet he still refused to face anything.