CTL 8

One day, the boy suddenly realized that he had been reincarnated with his memories.

He was terribly confused right after he found his past life’s memories. Just yesterday, he had been an ordinary boy who loved to play with his peers, a child who was nothing but cheerful, who loved nothing more than to laugh in his mother’s and father’s arms, but everything changed in an instant.

It truly felt as if the sky had fallen. Unsure of who he was, whether his past life was the real him or if this young boy’s body was himself, the boy wandered and suffered in agony. The people who had been familiar just yesterday now felt alien, to the point of giving him goosebumps. He hated it when they looked at him with worried faces and called him by a different name. His family and friends, seeing the boy like this, became afraid of him. But in truth, the one who was most alien, tormented, and afraid was none other than the boy himself.

So the boy went mad. He went mad and roamed the entire village, searching for his lover. But no matter how much he wandered, he could not see him. Not knowing where his lover was, the boy completely lost his mind. Even when his family caught him, washed him, and applied medicine, it was only for a moment; as soon as the boy came to his senses, he would be a mess again from wandering outside barefoot.

This went on for half a year. Around the time the boy’s feet had developed calluses and it no longer hurt to run around barefoot, a beautiful butterfly fluttered before him as he wandered the fields.

“……”

And when that butterfly, with its fluttering yellow wings, landed on the boy’s hand, the boy fell to his knees on the ground and wailed loudly.

From that day on, the boy began to plant flowers in the field. It was after he had fallen into a sweet sleep that day with the butterfly resting on his hand. The boy stole and sold his father’s prized trinkets and turned all of it into flowers. A butterfly sat atop the head of the boy as he climbed the field with a large cart full of flowers.

He dug the earth with his bare hands and carefully planted the flowers, over and over again. The boy did not go home. He did not sleep either. The boy only dug the earth to plant flowers until he collapsed from exhaustion. Without eating, without drinking water. Even with his eyes completely bloodshot, his hands digging the earth did not stop.

When flowers finally bloomed in profusion across the field, that beautiful butterfly flew over the flowerbed all day long. Flying freely to its heart’s content, and when it wanted to rest, it would sit on a flower and drink nectar, and then fly again. The boy, with a dazed face, followed the butterfly around, watching it fly freely, unbound by anything.

The boy followed the butterfly, crying and laughing. He would also sometimes mutter incomprehensible things. It was a promise that he would no longer break its wings.

True to his word, the boy did not dare to touch the butterfly first. When the butterfly, after flying over the flowers all day, would sometimes land on the boy’s hand, he would just watch it quietly without even touching it.

A fortnight passed. When the boy, who had collapsed in exhaustion under a large rock, woke up, he knew. He knew that the butterfly was no longer moving.

The flowers had not yet withered, but the butterfly did not wake from its slumber.

“The flowers you like are all over there, Seohwi.”

The boy, shriveled to skin and bones, muttered with lifeless eyes, but the butterfly did not move. Just like when it used to drowse limply on him… it had fallen asleep on the boy’s hand like that.

“……”

The boy suddenly looked at the field covered in flowers, placed the butterfly on the most beautiful flower, and lay down beside it.

Like the butterfly, the boy decided to lay his weary body to rest now.

The boy closed his eyes. Without waking, he fell into a sweet, eternal sleep.

✧ ✧ ✧

Yoongeon woke from his sleep. As he opened his eyes, sat up, and perched on the edge of the bed, his back was uncharacteristically slumped. He was, in fact, lethargic.

The room, with its blackout curtains drawn, was excessively dark. Even for someone accustomed to darkness, it was difficult to easily distinguish anything. In that darkness, he buried his face in his hands. Without saying a word, without making a sound.

Yoongeon cried with a stoic face. Even though no one was watching him, he did not reveal his sadness, his pain. After a long while, he stood up, staggering precariously.

“It’s okay…. I just have to hold on a little longer….”

Telling himself to calm down, Yoongeon soothed himself with practiced ease. The tears that flowed against his will were because he was mad, and it was nothing new. Having endured for so long against his will, it would be stranger if his mind were still sound, he thought.

Fortunately, the tears soon stopped. Only then did Yoongeon stretch, putting strength into his limp body. As if he had never been lethargically slumped, his muscles tensed up.

“Umm.”

Yes, this was good enough. There was nothing he could do about his mad mind, so he had to at least use his body well. Yoongeon rolled his shoulders and, as soon as the ridiculous tears stopped, made a phone call. The time on his phone was 4 AM, but Yoongeon, making the call, showed no hesitation whatsoever.

“Send someone over.”

[Yes. It will take about 30 minutes to get ready, Executive Director.]

Yoongeon said he understood and hung up after being told that the next fighter on the waiting list lived a bit far away.

Sometimes, Yoongeon would look for a boxing sparring partner at dawn. It was because in a world where violence was considered a sin, there were few ways for him to release the savagery he possessed.

[Thank you again this time, Executive Director.]

At first, he had learned sports. But sports were not enough to resolve his primal nature. Then, he met ‘Manager Lee,’ who introduced fighters to rich people who wanted to exercise privately for a fee, and since then, he had been consistently using him to let off steam. It was his own way of compromise.

[Should I prepare a boxer this time as well?]

“Whatever you want.”

Yoongeon was talented enough to have won multiple awards in amateur boxing competitions. Had he not been the son of a chaebol family, he would have been coveted here and there.

He hung up and changed into his workout clothes. Yoongeon’s eyes were somewhat sunken as he prepared to leave, but he himself paid it no mind at all.

Manager Lee was visibly pleased whenever Yoongeon called. Unlike other rich people who were fundamentally rude and complained a lot, Yoongeon, though rough, had good skills and was clean in his dealings afterward. That was why even though Yoongeon always sought fighters at dawn, there were many who wanted to have a go with him. When Yoongeon called, they would put their names on a waiting list and come in order.

A long time ago, he had thought about living as a boxer, since he only had to live until he met Seohwi anyway. But he gave up because of Chairman Go, who foamed at the mouth saying a chaebol’s son as a boxer was ridiculous, and his mother, who shed tears every day, worried that her son might get seriously hurt.

In truth, if only Chairman Go had thrown a fit, he wouldn’t have cared, but he couldn’t be stubborn because he was bothered by his mother who would anxiously cry throughout his matches. It wasn’t like he was desperate to be a boxer anyway.

30 minutes later, upon hearing that the fighter had arrived, Yoongeon went down to the first basement floor, brought a sports bag from the corner, and dropped it in front of the opposing fighter. The fighter opened it, looked at it, and then looked at him in surprise. It was full of cash.

“No rules, fight however you want. Until the opponent is knocked down.”

“Ye-yes.”

“If medical bills are incurred, the cost will be paid separately, so you don’t need to worry about the money being docked.”

As he spoke, cracking his neck from side to side, the fighter swallowed dryly and nodded. He didn’t even pretend to be surprised, as if he was already well aware that sparring with Yoongeon meant an inevitable trip to the hospital. Well, it was impossible for him not to know, as the rumor that sparring with him was not practice but a real fight, no, even rougher than a real fight, had already spread widely.

“I know that too. But, Executive Director, does that also apply to you?”

It was then. The man, who he thought would start without saying much, asked back.

“It’s possible that I could get the better of you, Executive Director.”

So what he was asking now was whether Yoongeon would not charge the fighter for medical bills even if he got hurt.

“Well, if you can, go ahead and try.”

It was cocky, but it didn’t feel bad. A guy who works out should have at least this much spirit. Yoongeon snorted with a stoic expression.

“Let’s begin.”

As he spoke, looking back at the manager who brought the fighter, the manager nodded. The sparring began under his supervision.

The match was rough. The momentum of Yoongeon relentlessly pushing his opponent and the opposing fighter clashing back without yielding was extremely brutal. But that was also brief. The fighter’s body began to get wrecked by Yoongeon’s continuous, indiscriminate attacks. Even though he was wearing protective gear, his face became covered in blood, and his body was in an even worse state.

Still, the fighter lasted 40 minutes against Yoongeon. When the opponent, hit with a liver shot, could no longer hold on and collapsed, signaling a knockdown, Yoongeon let out a rough breath, took off his gloves, and tossed them aside. While the manager was picking them up and tidying them, Yoongeon looked down at the fighter sprawled on the floor and said.

“I like you.”

“Heok… heok……”

“Come again if you’re interested next time. I’ll pay double from then on.”

He liked that he had lasted a long time against him, but more than anything, he liked his unyielding and persistent tenacity. He had received quite a few people from Manager Lee, but this one was the best of the lot, so if possible, he was willing to designate him and call him regularly.

“Shall we make it a regular arrangement then, Executive Director?”

“That’s for him to decide when he’s ready.”

When Yoongeon replied to Manager Lee’s cautious question, the fighter, panting heavily, answered a bit eagerly.

“If you choose me, I will work hard, Executive Director.”

“Alright, then.”

At the readily given permission, the fighter’s face lit up. A smile bloomed on Manager Lee’s face as well.

“This guy is tenacious and has quite a bit of skill. He will work hard to meet your standards, Executive Director.”

“Ah, yes.”

He appreciated the gratitude, but he had no desire for long-winded talk. Yoongeon nodded his head perfunctorily.

“Take the fighter to the hospital. You know the location.”

“Yes, of course, Executive Director.”

“If hospitalization is needed, I’ll open a VIP room for you.”

“Thank you.”

After saying that much, Yoongeon went outside. After sparring nonstop for 40 minutes, his whole body was soaked in sweat and sticky.

He didn’t notice it during the match, but after it was all over, he felt grimy and went straight up to the bathroom to wash up. After a long, meticulous shower, he looked in the mirror and saw a long scratch on his cheek, and his neck was also torn. Not only that, but there was a dark blue bruise on his side.

“……”

It throbbed quite a bit when he touched it. He really is skilled.

Fighters who lasted more than 20 minutes against him were rare, so this man could be called skilled. Not only that, but he was also the first person in this life to land such an effective blow on him.

But it wasn’t an even match. Now, as in the past, the only person who could be his equal was probably Seohwi alone. Of course, whether the current Seohwi was the same as before was something he would have to wait and see. Yoongeon had done this and that to release the rough nature he was born with, but hadn’t Seohwi been reborn and perfectly adapted to a new world? He might not be the same as before.

“Haa….”

But as his thoughts reached that point, Yoongeon remembered the fact that he couldn’t shake off the force that had held him tightly on the rooftop. Is the inherent strength he possesses still quite strong?

“No, that’s not it….”

But he would have to wait and see about that. Wasn’t that a time when he couldn’t maintain his balance properly? Anyway, since he didn’t have the same strength as when they fought with swords against each other, how Seohwi would be was a matter he would have to wait and see.

By the time he came out after checking his body, it was already past 6 o’clock. He was always short on sleep, so it was nothing new, and he just stretched once and left it at that. It would have been nice to have a meal since he had time, but Yoongeon found it bothersome and skipped even that.

—Rrrrr.

He couldn’t sleep anyway, and he had time before he had to go to work. As Yoongeon, who didn’t know how to use his time leisurely, was about to go to his study to find some work, the phone rang. There was only one person who would call at this hour.

[Executive Director, I’ve received a call from reporter Park Jinhoon.]

Secretary Im did not say things like he was sorry for calling at such an early hour. It was probably because he knew well that Yoongeon would be awake no matter when he called.

[It came 30 minutes ago.]

“Looks like he’s getting antsy.”

[I suppose so. He sent a revised article. Would you like to see it at the office, or should I send it to you right now? It seems he presumed that since the competition is over, you would start making a move.]

An undisguisable annoyance was audible in Im Seon-woong’s voice. Having worked beside Yoongeon for a long time, it seemed his temper had rubbed off.

“That bastard needs to learn how to wait.”

He said, walking towards the window.

“A hunting dog shouldn’t pester its master. Have the article ready at the office.”

[Understood.]

The call, as always, ended without dragging on.

“……”

Yoongeon looked outside. In the yard, bare trees with not a single leaf stood shabbily. It was quite desolate, but he stood there feeling no emotion whatsoever about the scenery. No landscape could properly form in his retinas; it would just fade away. Yoongeon smoked a cigarette with a stoic face before heading to work.

When he arrived around 8 o’clock, Secretary Im asked if he had just arrived. When he said that he had just prepared the article, he shook his head and first checked the urgent matters that needed to be handled. He was deliberately doing so, knowing that Park Jinhoon would be waiting anxiously.

“The phone call. Did another one come?”

“No. There haven’t been any since then.”

To the added comment, “But you never know,” Yoongeon briefly gauged how long his patience would last. If he couldn’t bear it and contacted him again, he was thinking of ditching Park Jinhoon.

A little later, as he was looking over the documents, employees started to arrive one by one. Yoongeon left the door to his executive office open so that his team members could come in and greet him. He didn’t actually want to, but it was one of the things he had been forced to compromise on because they would casually open the door and come in to say hello even if he kept it closed. The team members were so cheerful that he couldn’t even scold them, so he was stuck having to accept their greetings every single morning.

“Executive Director, good morning!”

“Yes, good morning.”

As always, the greeting she gave, raising her hand high as she entered, was boisterous. When Yoongeon returned the greeting to Inyeong, the head designer of this team, she sat down at her desk with a broad smile.

“Executive Director, hello.”

“Yes.”

Yebin, who came in next, also politely greeted him, saying, “Executive Director.” She usually called him oppa, but at the company, she acted aloof.

“Executive Director, you know we have a new employee coming today, right?”

“I know.”

In the meantime, Secretary Im, who had brought a cup of tea from the pantry, placed one on his own desk and handed the other to Yoongeon, saying. He always looked for coffee in the morning, but for some reason, what he brought was tea.

“You said you have a severe headache. Have some Solomon’s seal tea instead of coffee.”

“I don’t see what connection headaches have with Solomon’s seal tea.”

“It means there’s no good in consuming too much caffeine. You’ll be looking for it again at lunch anyway. Have your coffee then.”

“……”

He’s too meddlesome. As he was thinking that and staring blankly at the tea, someone entered the office with an awkward face and bowed. It was Seohwi.

Secretary Im, recognizing him, smiled brightly and welcomed him in. Everyone smiled and welcomed him, but Yoongeon couldn’t even smile and just stood awkwardly in his place.

“Alright everyone, this is the person who won first place in the competition. He is Mr. Yoon Seohwi.”

“Nice to meet you.”

When Inyeong greeted him, Seohwi bowed his head and returned the greeting.

“I saw you when you received the award. I thought you were very handsome then, but you look even more handsome in person.”

At her compliment, Seohwi seemed flustered and couldn’t give any reply. Inyeong laughed loudly and said, “He’s a very shy person,” and moved on. Seohwi didn’t say anything and then saw Yoongeon, who had come out.

“……”

“……”

Yoongeon, who hadn’t expected him to look his way, was inwardly flustered. But to look away felt like running away, so he couldn’t do that either.

“Are you hurt?”

“……What did you say?”

As he was enduring the uncomfortable gaze, Seohwi asked him. Wondering what he was talking about, he looked at him, and he pointed to Yoongeon’s neck and cheek.

“Oh my, that’s right. Executive Director, did you get hurt again?”

“Again…?”

“It’s nothing.”

At Seohwi’s question, the team members’ gazes focused on him. Yoongeon, uncharacteristically flustered, quickly averted his eyes.

“Our Executive Director does tend to come in with scratches quite often.”

“Ah… yes.”

At Head Designer Ha’s words, Seohwi nodded and then broke his gaze. Only then did Yoongeon feel like he could breathe, and he returned to his executive office as if fleeing.

“Haa… dammit.”

He had ended up talking to him by being outside for no reason.

Standing apart from the people gathered outside, he looked at their backs. Right, Seohwi needs normal people like them, not a crazy bastard like me. Thinking that this distance, far from Seohwi, was just right for him, Yoongeon bit his lip.

“Ah… I’m twenty-six this year….”

He could hear Seohwi speaking as he was unintentionally introducing himself amidst the excited people.

‘Yes, this is right.’

Just because he was put on the same team with him, Yoongeon had no intention of becoming a significant person to him. His goal was the same as it had always been. To be as inconspicuous as possible and not get involved. To willingly be trampled under his feet so that Seohwi could live a proper life. So, if he were to get involved with him, he intended to draw a line and push Seohwi away, as he had always done.

Now, as in the past, Seohwi was indifferent. When Yoongeon pushed him away, Seohwi would always be pushed away as he was pushed. Unlike him, he didn’t know how to cling desperately, so ignoring Seohwi had not been that difficult in the past. So it would be the same this time. To avoid getting any more involved, all he had to do was push him away.

While trying to calm himself down internally, Yoongeon sat down. He felt a presence observing him from outside but deliberately ignored it, needlessly shuffling through documents that wouldn’t even register in his eyes. Fortunately, after the first time, Seohwi paid no attention to him.

Still, he should have closed the door when he came in, he thought with regret. Just then, Secretary Im came in and closed the door. Only then did Yoongeon let out a sigh of relief.

“Executive Director, why did you suddenly go inside?”

“Is there any reason for me to be outside?”

“No, but you look so much like an outcast when you’re like this.”

At Secretary Im’s words, Yoongeon snorted in disbelief.

“Don’t be ridiculous about being an outcast. And didn’t you once say that a superior shouldn’t butt into where employees are having fun.”

When he mentioned that he had given such ‘advice’ back then, Secretary Im shrugged his shoulders.

“Ah, well, you’re right about that? They’re all having fun. Go and join in for a bit. You always skip out.”

“I’m busy.”