DPGR 110

The twilight of dawn had settled.

Moonlight poured in through the hospital window, casting its glow over the sleeping Jiho.

Dojin, seated on a stool he had dragged over, gazed at Jiho’s face with a dazed expression.

Like a starving beast staring at a plump rabbit, he involuntarily swallowed dryly.

In truth, he was tormented by unbearable hunger and thirst.

It was due to symptoms of guiding deprivation.

Rosy cheeks flushed with returning health, a rounded nose, plump lips, a slender jawline, and the faint scent rising from the nape of his neck.

Dojin’s eyes slowly traveled down, coming to rest somewhere on Jiho’s chest, which rose and fell in steady rhythm.

“…Ha.”

Dojin squeezed his eyes shut and roughly rubbed his face with both hands.

Then he pulled the blanket up to cover Jiho’s neck and, out of habit, extended an index finger to lightly feel under Jiho’s nose.

A faint breath brushed his fingertip.

He lingered there for quite a while before finally drawing his hand back.

Thud, thud.

Behind him, the heavy steps of a fox echoed across the floor.

Still gazing at Jiho, Dojin spoke in a flat, cool voice that bordered on indifferent.

“Shh. You’ll wake Guide Jiho.”

But Heendungi did not retreat and instead tried to start a conversation with him.

“…Jiho is healthy now. But Baek Dojin is not.”

In a flash, Heendungi transformed into a young boy and stood beside Dojin.

Dojin glanced at him briefly, then turned his head back toward Jiho and replied.

“I’m healthy too.”

“No, you’re not. Baek Dojin is sick. You need guiding.”

“I don’t need it. I’m managing it myself.”

“Medicine won’t help. What you need is Jiho.”

Heendungi’s voice took on a stubborn edge.

It sounded so much like Jiho when he was being obstinate that a trace of amusement softened Dojin’s expression.

“…Yes. I need Jiho Guide Jiho. But not for guiding.”

“…?”

A bitter smile tugged at Dojin’s lips.

Though his gaze was fixed on Jiho, his focus seemed far off, as if he were looking at something much farther away.

The truth was, part of him was still trapped on that day.

The day he almost lost Jiho.

Jiho, collapsed with a hole through his chest, pierced by the dream demon.

The moment Dojin held him, the faintest trickle of guiding energy had flowed into him.

He had never feared anything in his life.

But that day, Baek Dojin had been afraid, afraid of the guiding energy flowing from Jiho.

Or rather, he had feared the way his own mind and body had reacted.

The joy that rose unbidden, the instinctive whispers in the back of his mind.

“…I don’t need guiding.”

To crave guiding while Jiho lay dying.

To feel joy at that moment.

Even worse, part of his brain had begun calculating Jiho’s chance of survival, urging him to drain every last bit of guiding from him before he died.

It was sickening.

It was horrifying.

If not for the sliver of reason that had remained, he might have truly harmed Jiho with his own hands.

Though Jiho had survived, the feelings Dojin experienced that day remained like trauma burned into his soul.

“Humans are hard. Baek Dojin is harder.”

“…”

“But Baek Dojin is hurting. He needs guiding.”

“And if I get guiding from Guide Jiho, who you like so much, what then? If it ends up hurting him?”

“…That…”

Heendungi’s voice grew smaller.

Looking displeased, the child hesitated before puffing his cheeks and grumbling.

“The god said you can’t just love Jiho. Baek Dojin needs to be healthy too. That’s how we win the game.”

“So I’m just another game piece now.”

“Still… If Baek Dojin keeps being stubborn, I’ll tell Jiho!”

“Don’t tell Guide Jiho anything.”

“Then guiding—”

“I told you I don’t need it.”

“Don’t get mad at Heendungi. I’m just worried abou—!”

Both Heendungi, who had been chattering nonstop, and Dojin, whose lips had just parted, fell silent in unison.

Jiho’s breathing rhythm had changed.

“…Mmm.”

Fortunately, he didn’t wake.

He only shifted slightly, letting out a sleepy breath.

Still, worried he might rouse, Dojin rose to his feet.

“Let’s talk outside.”

“…Okay.”

The two quietly left the hospital room.

Click.

The sound of the door closing rang softly. Silence settled once again.

Jiho’s eyelids opened.

He hadn’t been asleep to begin with; his caramel-colored eyes were clear and focused.

“…”

Jiho quietly stared at the closed hospital door.

As the twilight lightened and dawn broke far in the distance, Dojin and Heendungi did not return.

Jiho, too, was unable to fall asleep and spent the rest of the time tossing and turning.

***

“Guide Jiho. Have you packed everything?”

“Yes. What about you, hyung?”

“Me too… Not that I had much to pack to begin with.”

A few days later, Dojin was preparing to return to Korea with Jiho.

“Even if we’ve forgotten something, we can get it in Korea, so don’t worry. I just need to make a quick phone call.”

“Okay.”

Leaving Jiho seated on the bed, Dojin stepped out of the hospital room.

Heendungi, who had been watching the two nervously, hurried after him with a face that said he had something to say.

Left alone, the smile vanished from Jiho’s face.

‘I still haven’t heard anything about guiding…’

Ever since eavesdropping on Dojin and Heendungi’s conversation a few mornings ago, Jiho had tried several times to bring up guiding with Dojin.

But—

“Hyung, you haven’t been looking so well lately…”

“Hmm? Really? I haven’t noticed anything.”

“…It feels like it’s been quite a while since we last did guiding. Could it be because you’re running low on it?”

“Now that you mention it, I guess it has been a while. Ah, but don’t worry about guiding. I still have some leftover from before, when you guided me… And I’ve been eating well and resting properly, so I’m in good condition.”

“No, being in good condition and guiding are two differe—”

“Anyway, it looks like we’ll be heading back to Korea soon. Didn’t you say you wanted to try some dessert here in Japan? How about we go out for lunch today?”

Just like that, everything Jiho brought up was smoothly deflected, with Dojin dodging and changing the subject like a slippery snake.

‘I was hoping he’d bring it up first.’

Because of that, Jiho had grown upset and stopped mentioning guiding altogether.

‘Now I just feel more uncomfortable…’

A long sigh slipped from Jiho’s lips. After all, what he’d heard from Dojin was that he didn’t need guiding.

‘If he doesn’t need guiding, does that mean… he doesn’t need me?’

The creeping unease was inevitable. But Jiho shook his head, telling himself not to jump to conclusions.

‘Later. I’ll try talking to him again once we’re back in Korea.’

Jiho, looking downcast, was about to move his suitcase to the doorway when it happened.

Dojin’s coat, carelessly thrown over a stool, caught on the bag and fell to the floor.

Startled, Jiho set the suitcase down and hurried to pick up the coat.

Thunk—

A small white container rolled out onto the floor. It must’ve fallen from a pocket.

‘What’s this?’

Jiho picked it up to check. There was no writing on the surface, so he had no choice but to open the lid to see what was inside.

What he found was a pill with a familiar shape, even Jiho recognized it.

‘…Guiding medication?’

His heart dropped with a thud. The color drained from his face.

He remembered Sena’s grumbling once. She had said that Yulchan had secretly taken guiding pills without telling her and got caught.

Back then, Jiho had comforted her, but he hadn’t really understood the full depth of her fury.

But now that he was in her shoes, he understood.

‘It’s not anger…’

What Sena had let out wasn’t just anger.

It had been disappointment, betrayal, self-doubt.

‘Was my guiding not enough? Is that why he’s taking pills now? Does that mean I won’t be needed in the future? Why? What did I do wrong?’

The calm expression Jiho had tried so hard to maintain crumbled. His eyes turned red in an instant.

‘No… Not yet… I haven’t heard Dojin-hyung explain.’

But he wasn’t sure Dojin would ever explain. Jiho had tried to bring it up several times, but Dojin always seemed to avoid the topic, as if it were burdensome.

‘Still… Still…’

Jiho struggled to hold himself together, trying not to fall apart.

Sniffling faintly, he reached out to put the bottle back into Dojin’s coat pocket—when it happened.

“Jiho Guide. Shall we head out no—”

The door opened. Dojin entered and his gaze landed on Jiho’s hand. His eyes immediately widened.

Jiho considered pretending he hadn’t seen the pills. Pretending he didn’t know. But then he changed his mind.

‘If I don’t say something now, hyung might never tell me.’

To Jiho, this was a chance. His voice trembled slightly as he called out.

“Hyung. This…”

“Oh, that. It’s just a supplement. I must’ve forgotten it was in my pocket.”

“…A supplement.”

“Yes.”

After hearing Dojin’s excuse, Jiho strangely felt calm.

He noticed that Dojin’s eyes were subtly shaking.

Even Baek Dojin was flustered—thrown off by the sudden lie.

Jiho decided to give him one more chance.

“What kind of supplement?”

“Just… a regular…”

“…”

“…”

Seeing Jiho’s face, Dojin seemed to realize that he knew what was inside the bottle.

He closed his mouth and lowered his head, as if he didn’t have the courage to meet Jiho’s eyes.