DPGR 172

“……”

Dojin unconsciously folded his arms over his chest and leaned to the side. The girl sitting facing the door noticed him first and raised her hand.

“Ah! Over here!”

The way she acted, as if she was part of their group, annoyed him. It felt like he was tagging along on Jiho and the girl’s date.

Just when he was about to frown, Jiho turned back and smiled warmly.

“Hyung! You’re here?”

“Jiho.”

When he walked over, Jiho glanced at the girl and explained.

“I thought it would take a while, so I came into the cafe…. But I left my wallet with you. So….”

“I happened to stop by the cafe too, and I saw Jiho-ssi. I bought him a drink,” the girl added quickly.

Jiho’s cheeks flushed red. Dojin disliked even that, but he forced down his irritation and politely gave thanks.

“Thank you. I’ll pay for the drink.”

“What? No way! Thanks to that, I got to meet Esper Baek Dojin, and I had fun talking about the movie with Jiho oppa.”

Jiho oppa? Dojin’s lips twitched for a second.

“It’s fine, really. Instead, could you give me an autograph?”

She did not notice the small change in his face and held out a napkin and pen. Dojin thought it would be impossible to get rid of her unless he signed, so he picked up the pen without hesitation.

“Thank you! I’ll treasure this forever!”

She bowed again and again with the napkin in hand and then left, showing that the autograph was her real goal. Just as he expected.

Before leaving, she told Jiho she had a good time today, which twisted Dojin’s insides once more.

Dojin sat down in the seat she had vacated and looked at Jiho, who was sipping his drink. Jiho blinked innocently, then stood up.

“I’ll buy us drinks. What do you want?”

“No, I’ll go. Stay here.”

“No, I’ll…”

“Sit.”

“…Okay.”

Ah. He sounded harsher without him meaning to. Jiho shrank right away and glanced at him. Dojin felt self-disgust, rubbed his face, then touched Jiho’s cheek lightly.

“Sorry. I was too sensitive. It’s fine, just sit. Do you want some cake?”

“No. I’m fine with this.”

“……”

The drink the girl bought was still in Jiho’s hand. Dojin stroked his chin to hide the twist of his lips and only nodded.

After that, the date was a mess.

“Um, you’re Esper Baek Dojin, right?”

“Kyaa! Photo! Photo!”

Photos and sightings of Dojin at the theater spread, and people started recognizing him in real time.

Fans who called themselves his crowded around, squealing. In the end, Dojin and Jiho had to leave the cafe without finishing even half their drinks.

“Haa….”

He felt a wave of exhaustion the moment his hands held the wheel. Even during his active days, he had not drawn this much attention.

Ever since he was known as the key contributor who closed the Final Dungeon, public interest in him had spiked. On top of that, his months of disappearing had only fueled curiosity.

‘But this is too much.’

Should they just go home now?

Dojin turned to Jiho while he worried. Jiho looked downcast again. It must have been because the date turned out so different from what he had hoped for.

“Sorry. Because of me….”

“N-no. It’s okay.”

“We still have time before the restaurant reservation. Should we go for a drive?”

“Hyung, you’re tired. Let’s just go home.”

“I’m not tired. Let’s go somewhere you want.”

“I’m fine….”

“I’m fine too.”

Neither gave way. Both insisted it was fine, then sighed at the same time.

The atmosphere in the car grew heavy. Neither of them knew why things had turned out like this. Jiho kept muttering “It’s fine, really….” but Dojin pretended not to hear and started the car.

He thought it might be better to take Jiho to the big bakery cafe he had picked out earlier after all.

But not long after, they hit a road jammed with cars. On a sunny weekend, it was natural that many people went out.

“……”

“……”

Silence wrapped around them. Dojin tapped the steering wheel with his finger, then noticed Jiho fiddling with something beside him.

“What’s that?”

“Yes?”

“That.”

“Ah. A handkerchief.”

In Jiho’s hand was a white handkerchief, with pink wildflowers embroidered at the edge.

Dojin’s eyes tightened. Jiho quickly added in a flustered tone.

“I should have given it back earlier…. But I dirtied it, so I couldn’t. So I said I’d wash it and return it.”

“…You said you’d wash and return it?”

“Yes?”

“Did you exchange numbers? No, more than that, does that mean you’ll meet her again?”

“……?”

I guess that’s the only way to return it, right?

Jiho’s clueless answer grated on Dojin. Since Dojin said nothing, Jiho looked at him nervously and asked.

“Should I not meet her?”

“…No. Do whatever you want.”

He was Jiho’s guardian and lover, not his warden or owner. He had no right to meddle in Jiho’s relationships.

But he could not hide how unhappy he felt. Even if he tried not to show it, his emotions still showed and he knew it would hurt Jiho.

“If hyung doesn’t like it….”

“Don’t mind me. Do what you want.”

“But if hyung dislikes it, then I won’t….”

“It’s fine. And… it’s better if we don’t interfere with each other’s relationships.”

“…What?”

“I won’t care. Do whatever you want.”

Since this was his first proper relationship, Dojin had once read a few books about healthy dating. They said not to get too deeply involved in each other’s lives.

Especially when it came to friendships and private matters, it was better to leave them free. Dojin actually wanted to meddle in everything from start to finish, but the books had taught him it would harm his relationship with Jiho, so he tried not to show it.

“…Hyung.”

The traffic started to move slowly again. Jiho’s low voice broke the silence as Dojin drove.

“Yes?”

Dojin glanced sideways at him. Jiho had his head lowered and was fidgeting with his fingers.

“Jiho-ya?”

“…Hyung, if I meet someone, doesn’t it bother you?”

“That’s….”

He wanted to say no, that it bothered him so much he could go crazy. He wanted to confess that honestly, but he held it in for now.

“You’re an adult now, Guide Jiho. I don’t have the right to interfere.”

“…I just want to ask, in case.”

“Yes.”

“What are we right now?”

“…What?”

What kind of question was that. Dojin turned his head to look at him, dumbfounded. Jiho’s face looked serious.

“Wait.”

Dojin pulled the car aside and slowed down. His car stopped on the shoulder.

“What do you mean, what are we?”

“Exactly that. I’m confused.”

“……”

“Are we just housemates? Roommates, something like that.”

Jiho looked up at him with desperate eyes. Desperate? Dojin could not understand his intention. It was Dojin who felt confused.

“Why are you asking that?”

“Because I think I was mistaken.”

“Mistaken? I don’t understand what Guide Jiho is talking abou…”

He was so surprised that he called Jiho by his old title. Jiho looked at him with gloomy eyes, then stubbornly turned his head.

“Let’s go home.”

“……”

“I want to go home.”

In the end Dojin turned the car around at Jiho’s request. The movie date, the bakery cafe, the dinner at the restaurant. All of it was abandoned as their car drove down the road.

On the way, Dojin tried several times to talk, but Jiho’s tightly closed lips showed no sign of opening.

After that date went completely wrong, both of them stayed silent. The silence felt so heavy that it to breathe.

***

It was not really a fight, but a fight-like cold war dragged on. After that ruined date, Jiho insisted on sleeping in a separate room.

Dojin tried to coax him, but sulking Jiho refused to speak.

From what he had read in relationship books, Dojin thought Jiho needed time, so after two days he decided to leave him alone.

A week passed like that. Still no conversation, and reconciliation felt distant. Dojin could not hold it anymore. After much hesitation he called Kijoon.

–Yup! Kijoonie took the call!

“…Yeah. Hey, Kijoon.”

–Captain? Wow! Did you call because you missed me?

“Yeah. How have you been? Nothing going on?”

–Yes! I’m fine. But what’s the real reason for your call?”

Kijoon was smarter than he looked. He already knew Dojin had a reason for calling.

Dojin did not like dragging things out, so he got straight to the point.

–So, you mean you fought with Guide Jiho? You, Captain?

“It wasn’t… really a fight….”

–That’s a fight! And I heard Guide Jiho isn’t even talking to you! Wow, he must be really mad. Why did you say that kind of thing?”

Dojin’s eyes widened. He adjusted the phone and asked with some urgency.

“Do you know why Guide Jiho is angry?”

–…Wait. You don’t know?

“……”

–Wow. I thought since you apologized, you knew what you did wrong.

Kijoon hit him with words. The painful truth made Dojin rub at his sore chest.

“It’s not like I don’t know at all. I guessed it’s because I didn’t answer right away when he asked ‘what are we.’ Isn’t that it?”

–Ha…. Captain. People’s hearts are more complicated than that.

“You mean there’s another reason?”

–Of course! First, at the theater that day people recognized you, right? Most of them were female fans, weren’t they?

“…That’s true.”

–And you must have shaken hands, signed things, maybe even taken pictures, right?

Dojin’s fingertips twitched. Kijoon smirked knowingly.

–Captain, you can’t pretend you don’t notice things like that.

“…I only shook hands.”

–See, there’s one reason already. Physical contact with the opposite sex. That’s jealousy.

What? Dojin’s eyebrow shot up. He could not understand why shaking hands with people who recognized him counted as physical contact.

But when Kijoon told him to flip the perspective, he quickly understood.

‘If Jiho went around shaking hands with others….’

He wouldn’t have felt good either. But if that was the case, didn’t it mean Jiho had felt jealous over him?

“…Jiho doesn’t get jealous though…?”