DTTM 32
by LiliumChapter 32: I didn’t realize you were so sentimental
“You always say that.” Zong Yanlei rubbed my lower lip with his finger, then probed into my mouth. He pressed down on my tongue with a hint of punishment. “When I catch you, you quickly admit your mistake. But you don’t really think you did anything wrong.”
“No…” I mumbled, biting down gently and then quickly releasing.
“No?” The ice pack stopped between my shoulder blades, then slid down again. Zong Yanlei pressed against my tongue, tightening his grip on my chin: “If it were ‘no,’ you wouldn’t have impersonated the princess for all these years, watching me get played like a fool.”
Was he digging up all the old grievances now to settle scores?
I was lost in thought, and it gradually became increasingly difficult to concentrate.
“You’re convinced that I won’t really punish you, which is why you continue to do bad things with such a clear conscience…” The ice pack went all the way down to the lowest part of my waist, where it connected to my hips.
Water droplets seeped in through the crevices, and the coolness seemed to have a powerful penetrating force, slowly radiating to the other side of my body, causing that originally quiet and weak place to raise its head.
I shifted my hips uncomfortably, trying to get rid of the unbearable chill, but I only felt even more dizzy.
It’s been observed before that men seem to be inherently incapable of having two heads that are both alert at the same time. One must always prevail over the other.
Oh well, I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately, so I’ll just treat this as a break.
I had no intention of holding back. I used my arms and knees, and managed to prop myself up a little. And then, right in front of Zong Yanlei, I squeezed my right hand between my body and the blankets.
Zong Yanlei paused in his churning motion, chuckled softly, and withdrew his finger.
“You seem to be enjoying yourself.” With that, he lifted the ice pack behind him.
I ignored him and just kept speeding up my movements.
My arms couldn’t support me anymore, and I buried my face in the pillow again, each breath hot and intense.
Suddenly, something hotter and bigger replaced the ice pack and covered my entire tailbone.
My frozen nerves felt as if they had been rekindled, becoming so sensitive they were almost stinging. I trembled and let out a muffled moan into the soft pillow.
Zong Yanlei’s hand massaged the area that was supposedly bruised, I couldn’t tell if he was trying to help me reduce the bruising or if he simply wanted to make me feel pain.
I hope it’s the latter.
He was right about one thing: I admitted my mistake because I was caught and had no choice but to retreat, not because I genuinely repented. Since I’d already done it, there was nothing to regret. Just as I was destined to betray him again, which was undoubtedly a terrible thing for him, but for me, it was an inevitable outcome that had been planned long ago.
So I hope he won’t be soft-hearted, at least… so that I don’t seem so immoral.
With vision withdrawn from my five senses, the others became more acute. His knuckles sliding along the grooves of my spine from bottom to top, the itch seeping through my flesh and into my bones, making me want to release it, to scream.
“So many scars, it’s really ugly.”
I bit my lip tightly, my body trembled as if a broken engine rattled inside me.
My upper body slumped into the bed, while my waist lifted up.
Emotions gradually rose until my ears were ringing and every pore on my body was screaming to open, preparing for the upcoming moment of ultimate bliss.
“I allow you to move around on your own, but you just play by yourself and don’t listen to anything I’m saying.”
Zong Yanlei’s voice seemed to be behind a curtain of water, so muffled that I couldn’t hear it clearly.
His finger withdrew again, then quickly returned, this time to a place I never expected.
“Um…” I suddenly lifted my head up, a mixture of panic and disbelief on my face, and said, “Don’t… wait!”
Zong Yanlei lowered his eyes and ignored me.
Like prying open a blanched clam, his fingers easily squeezed between the fleshy parts, replacing my hand and rubbing without warning.
He was a completely tyrannical and dictatorial man, giving me no chance to breathe or refuse.
It was as if a Category 10 hurricane had swept through my mind, and everything that should have been on the ground was thrown into the air. My soul left my body and, amidst the chaotic wind, thunder, and lightning, my body stiffened as I experienced what it meant to be on the brink of death.
I slammed my head on the pillow, clutching the blanket beneath me with my left hand, my jaw clenched so tightly it ached.
A few breaths later, I collapsed, breathless and completely exhausted.
“If you still feel pain tomorrow, just apply a hot compress yourself.” As Zong Yanlei withdrew his hand, he didn’t forget to pull down my clothes.
Feeling him leave the bed, I wearily turned my head to look, and saw him rubbing the liquid between his fingertips, looking quite intrigued.
“Don’t you usually do this yourself?” he said, raising his hand, pinching his thumb and forefinger together, then releasing them. “Look.” The thick liquid, like glue, stretched out in strands between his fingertips.
The act was essentially for the purpose of reproduction. An individual alone implied no possibility of reproduction. Therefore, I didn’t see the need for it.
Life would be much easier if there were fewer meaningless things to do.
“I don’t,” I said. “What’s the point of doing it all by myself?”
Upon hearing this, Zong Yanlei paused slightly, and as if recalling something, all his expressions slowly faded from his face.
“I didn’t realize you were so sentimental. Your wife died, and all your physical needs died with her?”
What does this have to do with anything?
“I…” I wanted to explain, but found there was nothing to explain, and I had no way to explain, so I could only shut my mouth again to prevent myself from saying anything more and making a mistake.
He took my silence as consent, chuckled, picked up the ice pack, and turned to head to the restroom.
When he came out again, his sleeves were down and his hands were clean. He took his coat from the bench at the foot of the bed and put it on. This time, he didn’t go through the balcony. Instead, he pushed open the bedroom door and left without looking back, without saying a word to me the whole time.
After he left, I turned over and stared at the ceiling above me, which was covered with intricate patterns. I was clearly exhausted, but sleep eluded me.
“Are you here to deliver a message for Zong Yanlei again?” Fifteen-year-old Chu Luo had already grown into a very beautiful young woman.
At a banquet attended by celebrities, she went outside alone for some fresh air, holding a rose she had picked from somewhere, and listlessly tugged at the petals.
“Would you like to take a look today?” Just like the past four years, I asked the same question.
Chu Luo shook her head: “I don’t love him. If I don’t love him, I can’t give him hope.”
She scattered flower petals along the way, and I stepped on the petals she scattered.
“It’s strange, it’s been four years, how come he’s still so persistent?” She turned around abruptly, “Did you even convey my message?”
I stopped abruptly, leaned forward slightly, and looked at the ground: “I did.”
“Then go back and tell him again that I won’t marry him.” With that, she threw the bare stem, devoid of petals, to the ground. “If love has to be controlled by others, what’s the point of living?”
I kept saying yes and yes, but after I stepped back, I found a secluded corner, took out the letter from my pocket, and opened it.
At first glance, the handwriting on the letter looked quite clean and powerful, but upon closer inspection, it wasn’t hard to notice that among the beautiful strokes, one or two were severely skewed, as if the writer had been gently bumped from the side by some force.
Zong Yanlei’s hands would hurt from writing too much, and he would have to rest for a while before writing again. I watched him write this short letter of a few hundred words for a whole morning.
The letter was not complicated; it simply told the princess that he was doing well and inquired about her well-being.
I tore the letter to shreds and threw it in the trash can. I walked through the banquet hall as if nothing had happened, slowly leaving the brightly lit, laughter-filled building behind me.
At the age of sixteen, Zong Yanlei was admitted to Baiyujing Shengzhe University. This ecclesiastical institution was jointly established by the royal family and the Holy Church. Almost all of the teaching positions, including professors, tutors, and deans, were held by the clergy of the Jing Shi religion.
This uniqueness resulted in its student body being composed entirely of wealthy and noble individuals, representing nearly 80% of the aristocratic children of Penglai.
Given Zong Yanlei’s physical condition, he should have been able to commute to school, but Wuxi Li arranged for him to stay in the student dormitory under the pretext of cultivating his social skills. As for me, because Shengzhe University did not allow nobles to bring servants to school, I also had to take an entrance exam, the school was initially unwilling to accept me because I was a commoner, and it was only after Wuxi Li went through a lot of trouble that I was finally admitted.
However, even if I could attend classes with Zong Yanlei and live in the same dormitory, I was still a servant of the Zong family in essence, and this would not change because my identity was that of a “student”.
“Young Master, I’m back.”
The dormitories at Shengzhe University weren’t as spacious as the Zong family mansion; two people shared a room, with one bedroom, one living room, and one bathroom. At first, I was worried that Zong Yanlei wouldn’t be used to it, but after living there for a month or so, I found that he seemed to like it quite a bit, appearing even more relaxed than at home.
Zong Yanlei sat on the sofa by the fireplace, holding an electronic screen and browsing something. Hearing my voice, he looked up, held the screen vertically, and obscured the lower half of his face.
“Princess…”
I was about to say the words I had prepared along the way, such as how much the princess missed him, and that he should not be picky about food, eat more vegetables, and take his medicine properly, but I was interrupted by him after only one word.
“Take off your clothes.”
“…Av?”
He flipped the screen over so it was facing me.
I squinted and realized it was an illustration from a physiology class, reproductive behavior and the fertilization process between opposite sexes.
“I’ve never really understood… the male part.” His bandaged fingers traced the area where the two figures were joined in the picture. Zong Yanlei stared at me and said something startling, “Show me.”
Perhaps due to the side effects of the medication, he didn’t experience any reaction in that area. Plus, he was already sixteen; given his age, it was understandable that he’d be curious about normal male physiological responses.
“Ten thousand.” Seeing that I didn’t move for a long time, Zong Yanlei held up a finger and said, “Didn’t you want to save your grandmother? If you fulfill my request, I’ll give you ten thousand.”
You should have said so earlier.
“Actually, there’s nothing special about it…” I said as I unbuttoned my shirt and slowly walked towards him.
Clothes were scattered all over the floor, and more skin was exposed to the air. It was early winter outside, but thankfully there was a fireplace burning inside, so even without clothes, I didn’t fear catching a cold.
“And then?” Looking down at my body, which was structured similarly to his yet not quite the same, Zong Yanlei frowned and asked, “Why aren’t you responding?”
“Usually, nothing happens without stimulation.”
“Stimulation? What kind of stimulation?”
“Hmm, sound, visuals, touch, and so on…”
He reached out his hand: “Touch?”
I quickly stepped aside and advised, “It will get the bandage dirty.”
He looked at his fingers, then raised his eyes, his blue-green eyes glowing a warm golden hue in the firelight.
“Then you do it yourself,” he said with a smile.

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