F Side Story 7

Yeonho forced himself to finish reading the book just before the cafe closed. It wasn’t difficult to understand, but he still didn’t like it. He couldn’t agree with the ideas it contained. Of course, there was nothing wrong with the fact that Siwoo liked such content. That wasn’t the issue.

What broke his heart was that he couldn’t embrace something Siwoo loved. If he truly loved him, why couldn’t he accept something so small?

He threw the book away on the way home. He was feeling guilty. Siwoo had apparently enjoyed talking with that man about it, but all Yeonho could say was that it sounded like nonsense. That felt pathetic.

As he opened the front door, he looked over at the apartment next door. Then back to his own. Had Siwoo and that man met again after work? If this kept up and a conversation began between the two, would it be impossible to stop? Even if the approach had been deliberate, that man knew too much about Kim Siwoo.

“No. Stop thinking, Joo Yeonho.”

The moment he stepped into the house, he knew he needed to take the medication from the psychiatrist. When the “thought factory” started running, it was never a good sign. Yeonho was clearly on edge. He had tried hard to stay grounded, but his nerves had already been frayed.

Siwoo stood just inside the front door, his face pale. With a cold glare, he spoke in a sharp voice.

“It’s ten at night. How could you leave me alone for four hours? You didn’t pick up the phone, and your replies were one-word texts.”

Yeonho blinked quietly at Siwoo’s serious complaint. Ten wasn’t even that late, honestly. But four hours could definitely feel like neglect from Siwoo’s perspective. Yeonho accepted his fault and kicked off his shoes, rushing to wrap his arms around Siwoo’s waist.

“I’m sorry. I just wanted to go to a bookstore alone for the first time in a while. I got caught up reading and didn’t check my phone much.”

“You… need time alone? Without me?”

Siwoo looked genuinely shaken. He couldn’t understand why Yeonho would want time apart.

He only endured being separated from Yeonho because adult life made it necessary. If he had the choice, he wouldn’t spend a single second away from him. They had already spent far too long apart despite loving each other.

“Wouldn’t it be more fun to go to the bookstore together and read together? While you were gone, I just sat there waiting for you, worried you’d never come back.”

“Did you eat dinner?”

“How could I cook dinner with you gone? I wasn’t hungry, and I had no appetite.”

“Well, I’m here now. Are you hungry? I’ll make something quick. No dumplings though. We already had them six times over the weekend.”

Yeonho held Siwoo tight, his body hot with frustration. Siwoo couldn’t hide how upset he was, yet he still helped undress Yeonho naturally and gently, preparing to wash him.

“We shouldn’t eat this late. I need to watch my weight.”

“Alright. Then let’s wait a little. But don’t misunderstand. I still love being with you.”

“Then why did you do that?”

While letting Siwoo tend to him, Yeonho decided to confess honestly why he had left him alone for “a whole four hours.”

“That book you talked about with Park Jihyun earlier.”

“…”

“I read it. I wanted to talk to you about it too. I was jealous that you two had something to share that I didn’t. I kept thinking, why didn’t I read it sooner?”

“Yeonho-ya…”

“Our team lead told me. She said you two looked close. But that’s just a misunderstanding, right?”

He hadn’t been upset at first, but as he spoke, he started feeling a little sad. He forced a calm face so he wouldn’t end up whining like a child in front of Siwoo again. Smiling softly, he patted Siwoo as he stood stiff as a statue.

“It’s okay, really. I’m not mad about it. That’s all. Don’t worry. I didn’t say anything because I thought it’d be embarrassing if you dragged me to the bookstore. I’m already embarrassed now. It took a lot of courage to say this.”

He kissed Siwoo lightly and headed to the bathroom. Siwoo followed, filling the tub. After removing Yeonho’s clothes, he carried him into the water. Placing Yeonho across his thighs, he cupped his cheeks and whispered.

“I’m sorry I got mad. You must’ve been lonely for more than four hours.”

“Nine hours.”

Yeonho tried to pretend he was fine, but the truth slipped out. The moment their eyes met, he couldn’t hold back anymore. He buried his face into Siwoo’s shoulder and pouted. Siwoo gently stroked his back and shoulders again and again.

Siwoo felt a chill as he realized he might have lost Yeonho during those nine hours. He was grateful Yeonho had only left for four hours and returned home safely. Then he told Yeonho something he hadn’t known.

“My mom used to force me to read that book when I was little. If I said no, she’d hit me with a stick. I hate that book more than anything. And he was reading it.”

“What?”

Yeonho lifted his head. Siwoo continued, gently smoothing over his puffy, tear-stained face.

“That’s why I brought it up. When I led the conversation, he started repeating the same things my mom used to say while teaching me. I think she must’ve trained him thoroughly.”

“No wonder the book sounded like complete nonsense… I really tried to understand it, but I just couldn’t…”

“Exactly. I feel the same way. It’s all nonsense.”

“Really?”

When Siwoo nodded, Yeonho finally let out a breath of relief. Siwoo, now calm, massaged Yeonho’s soft body with both hands.

“She probably planned the whole thing. She thought if we broke up, I’d go crawling back to her. But even if she put a gun to my head, I’d never go back.”

Love is a chain of hurt feelings and apologies. Extreme emotions come and go in such short bursts. Right now, Yeonho and Siwoo felt the same. I love you so much that even small things upset me. And I’m sorry for being upset over something so small.

Holding back his tears, Yeonho began kissing Siwoo all over his face.

The idea that Siwoo and Park Jihyun shared a fateful bond had never been true. If Yeonho had been an outsider, he would’ve stayed calm and rational. But when it became his own problem, it clouded his vision and darkened his mind. He’d been lost in that fog all day, thinking about nothing else. Like a fool.

“Hyung, I’m sorry, but I really struggle with jealousy. Every time I hate myself for it, I just wish I could love you a little less. Maybe if I loved you less, I’d be more sensible. I don’t want to hurt you.”

Siwoo’s face darkened instantly, and he spoke firmly.

“No.”

After confirming his response, Yeonho smiled faintly and playfully tried to prod him more.

“Just a little. I don’t mean I won’t love you. Just ease it a tiny bit. Please? No?”

Siwoo, eyes burning with emotion again, grabbed Yeonho’s chin roughly.

“You can be as sensitive as you want. You can hurt me if you need to. Just don’t hold anything back. I’ll do the same. I’ll be needy and clingy and selfish like a kid. If you’re not next to me, I’ll feel like I’ll die…”

“You idiot. And that’s why I’m hurting you now.”

Yeonho, who had pretended to want to love Siwoo less just to tease him, let his smile fade. Cupping Siwoo’s cheeks in his hands, he leaned their foreheads together and whispered.

“I just… can’t love you any less.”

And he kissed him.

***

Now that they had uncovered the identity of the suspicious intruder and understood each other’s hearts, the remaining issue wasn’t complicated. They agreed to discuss how to deal with Siwoo’s parents, who had stooped to such a petty scheme to get their son back. They didn’t get the chance to talk it through in detail, but they made up their minds before falling asleep.

Siwoo woke up to a sweet surprise. His palms were covered in another obsessive love letter from Yeonho. It was a good way to start the day. But it didn’t last long.

Standing in front of the company president, Siwoo wore a troubled expression.

“Let’s go on an overseas trip together with the investor from yesterday’s meeting. It’s for training purposes. And you speak fluent English, which is perfect. It’s a three-night, four-day trip.”

Siwoo had no valid reason to refuse.

“Would it be possible for Joo Yeonho to come along as well? I think your son should learn even more than I would.”

“The PR team is busy with winter promotions. And officially, Joo Yeonho is still a new hire. We can’t let the team suffer. Overseas projects are originally under your department anyway.”

“I understand. Thank you for considering me.”

The fact that Park Jihyun, who managed the investor’s assets, might join the trip was a concern. But what worried Siwoo more was Yeonho, who would struggle to sleep without him.

Even more concerning, though, was himself, Kim Siwoo, who would have to survive those days without Yeonho. The separation hadn’t even happened yet, but the anxiety was already creeping in.