F97

Yeonho raised his hips high to make it easier for Siwoo to handle his body. He bent his thighs and left enough space between his knees. Lying face down with his chest pressed against the bed, the curve of his back deepened.

Siwoo was still spreading the flesh with fingers. His breath brushed against the hole that had opened along with the parted cheeks. When his fingertips began to toy with the wrinkled entrance, Yeonho’s face grew hot.

Though he was actively offering himself like this, Yeonho still felt embarrassed about exposing his body in front of Siwoo. It wasn’t an act. He still needed courage. Maybe he always would.

Siwoo stuck out his tongue and licked around the entrance. Unconsciously, Yeonho tensed, clenching his hole tightly. Exhaling slowly, he murmured in a languid tone as Siwoo wet his dry entrance with his mouth.

“Put it in today. I’ve waited too long.”

Without replying, Siwoo sank his thumb deep into the wet hole. Caught off guard, Yeonho buried his face in the pillow with a moan.

“Haah… Mmh…”

Siwoo watched Yeonho’s trembling thighs and clenched bottom, feeling a mix of affection and concern. It seemed like it would take time again to loosen him up after such a long pause.

He kissed the tense muscles of Yeonho’s butt with care. As he repeated the gesture, Yeonho gradually relaxed. The tight hole that had clamped down on his thumb began to ease up.

Every time he opened Yeonho up like this, Siwoo felt guilty. The entrance was so small, the passage inside unbearably narrow, yet he was forcing it open to insert himself and chase after a simple, base pleasure. It made him feel disgusted with himself.

It even felt criminal to invade a place that was never meant to be touched. But once he was inside, he would lose his mind. The guilt vanished like it was never there.

While keeping his fingers inside, he gently stroked Yeonho’s testicles and shaft with his other hand.

“It’s only been two months, and it’s like we’re back at the start.”

Yeonho felt guilty watching Siwoo work so hard to loosen him up every time, knowing how much he had refrained from penetration during that time. He understood how hard this moment must be for him, knowing Siwoo likely wanted nothing more than to bury himself inside and take him completely.

With his breath slightly quickened and a teasing tone, Yeonho asked,

“Do you ever have bad thoughts when you look at me?”

“What kind of thoughts?”

“Like doing whatever you want. I mean, just thoughts. They’re only thoughts.”

“Do you think about me like that?”

Siwoo smiled and pulled Yeonho into his arms, turning him over gently. As Siwoo’s hands found their way between Yeonho’s legs again, Yeonho whispered,

“I do.”

Then he confessed something he had never said out loud before.

“Sometimes I wished you’d never be able to use your hands again. So I could do everything for you.”

Siwoo slipped two fingers in at once and couldn’t stop smiling as he kissed Yeonho’s lips again and again. He already knew without being told. He had seen how happy Yeonho was taking care of him when his hand was hurt.

As Siwoo continued to smile without reacting much, Yeonho pushed further.

“I used to fantasize about raping you, or kidnapping and locking you up…”

But Siwoo didn’t look surprised. Instead, he kissed Yeonho slowly and whispered,

“If you saw what goes on in my head, you’d run for your life.”

“What kind of thoughts?”

“Thoughts about doing it with you right in front of your parents…”

He finished the rest of his sentence in a whisper right into Yeonho’s ear. Hearing such obscene words from Siwoo, Yeonho blushed. Somehow, knowing what lurked in Siwoo’s mind excited him even more.

Siwoo pulled out his fingers and left the bed for a moment. Yeonho, now without his bathrobe, looked at him with slight dissatisfaction as he returned with a condom and lube. Siwoo pinched Yeonho’s cheek and asked,

“What now?”

“Do you like using condoms with me?”

Yeonho snatched the condom from his hand and quickly stripped off his pants and underwear. Siwoo’s erection, already throbbing and dripping, looked painfully hard.

“And why are you so good at holding back?”

His calm demeanor was completely at odds with his arousal. Most people wouldn’t be able to restrain themselves. They would have already hurt him with how roughly they’d take him. Possibly enough to draw blood.

Siwoo exhaled and stroked Yeonho’s hair gently.

“Tell me what you want. I’ll do everything for you tonight.”

Yeonho didn’t hesitate. He confessed openly.

“I want you to keep coming inside me all night without a condom, until I’m full. So full that my belly bulges.”

With a shy expression, he tapped his lower belly. Siwoo nodded and accepted the request.

“Okay. I’ll do that. But I can’t always do it like that. Yeonho, the reason I don’t treat you roughly isn’t because I love you less. It’s because I love you.”

There were many things Siwoo wanted to do to Yeonho because he loved him so much, and because he loved him, he couldn’t bring himself to act on them. Siwoo believed Yeonho must understand that feeling deeply. The idea of loving him less didn’t even apply. If he had loved him less, he wouldn’t have had the desire to release himself endlessly inside someone else’s body to begin with.

Yeonho looked up at him with sparkling eyes and asked,

“I know. That you’re holding back because you love me. But what I want to know is, do you ever get those urges with me too?”

Siwoo pushed Yeonho down and grabbed his ankles, spreading his legs apart. As he thrust his erection deep into the slick, lubed entrance all at once, he spoke.

“Stop teasing me. If you keep it up, I really might ruin you.”

“Aah… haah… ah…”

Siwoo forced his way through the tight inner walls and drove in to the hilt. Yeonho’s waist jerked upward on its own. The pain, no different from his first time, made him briefly regret provoking Siwoo, but as soon as he saw him thrusting like a beast, he praised himself instead.

Siwoo disliked the way he lost control in moments like this, pounding Yeonho at a rapid pace. Seeing Yeonho inevitably in pain in his arms made him feel less like a person and more like a male in heat.

He believed that what set humans apart from beasts was their ability to uphold humanity. But Yeonho constantly tried to break that in him. And when he gave in, pretending to lose, he pushed Yeonho to the limit. A cruel part of him wanted to see how much Yeonho could bear in the name of love.

“Yeonho, do you know what I want to fill you with…”

Siwoo’s words stopped there. He didn’t want to say more.

“You couldn’t possibly understand how horrible my feelings are. I can’t say them out loud.”

“Haah… ah, ah… mmh…”

Yeonho’s prostate was deep inside. Siwoo wanted them to come together, he deliberately struck that spot fast and hard. Yeonho spilled over his own belly, and Siwoo poured his release into him just like Yeonho had asked. Then, out of breath, he blurted out what was in his head.

“I’ll fill you until your belly bursts if that’s what you want. I don’t care if you end up bedridden. To be honest, I kind of like it when you’re in pain. It means I get to care for you and spoil you.”

“Hyung, I love it when you’re honest like this. But you always have to be pushed this far before you open up…”

Yeonho smiled lazily as he felt Siwoo’s release inside him. It brought him joy to take Siwoo in, even if he couldn’t swallow him whole like he imagined. In the end, Siwoo really was inside him.

Before long, Siwoo, already hard again inside Yeonho’s body, sat him up and entered him once more from behind. With his shins braced on the bed, Yeonho leaned back against Siwoo’s chest.

One hand ran over his soft belly that kept poking out slightly, the other tangled in Siwoo’s hair. He turned his head and kissed Siwoo’s lips, whispering,

“Next time, be born as my son. I’ll love you from the moment you’re born.”

At that moment, Siwoo stopped moving. He knew all too well that Yeonho felt a kind of paternal affection for him. He had even wondered before if things would be better if he had actually been Yeonho’s child. But he didn’t want to be born from Yeonho in some metaphorical sense. He didn’t want to live that life in reality.

He pulled Yeonho tightly into his arms, rubbing his lips against Yeonho’s cheek with a soft, grumbling voice as he firmly rejected the idea.

“No.”

“Why not? I just want to see what you looked like as a baby.”

“Who would you sleep with to give birth to me?”

Yeonho blinked. He hadn’t thought that far. Caught up in the imaginary scene, Siwoo suddenly felt a jealous rage at a nonexistent parent and sank his teeth hard into Yeonho’s neck like a possessive cub.

***

Seong Junyoung was sentenced to pay a fine. That was it. The amount was different, but in the end both Yeonho and Junyoung were fined. When he heard the outcome, Yeonho pressed his lips together and just blinked.

He hadn’t exactly expected anything else. Maybe with Seong Junhee things would’ve been different, but what Seong Junyoung had done was harder to punish by clearly separating victim and perpetrator.

Their father kept his promise and sent Seong Junyoung to the United States. Yeonho’s goal had always been to protect Siwoo from Junyoung’s threats, take away the inheritance he would have received, and get him out of their lives. So he decided this result was enough. Still, he knew Siwoo had something left he wanted to do.

Siwoo, too, had expected the outcome to turn out this way. Holding Yeonho gently in his arms, he asked softly as those big eyes blinked up at him with a pitiful look.

“Which part of the US did Seong Junyoung go to? The place he did that language program?”

“Yeah, that one. It’s close to where you studied abroad.”

“I see.”

Once, Siwoo had told Seong Junyoung he would do whatever it took to make his life a living hell. And if he had said it once, he intended to keep his word.