Chapter 26 – You Reap What You Sow

Fang Zheng swore he hadn’t meant to imply anything with that comment about teasing young guys—it was purely sarcastic banter, because normally, people tease girls, right? But then the guy had taken the bait and run with it, leaving Fang Zheng himself dumbfounded.

Fang Zheng didn’t want to be like Xu Di and Gou Xiaonian, who, being gay themselves, saw everyone else as potentially gay. But as a fellow member of the community, he had his own radar, and right now, the guy in the YY channel seemed… well, kind of ambiguous. =_=

As a seasoned veteran of the gay scene, teasing a young guy came as naturally to Jiang Yang as breathing. The words had flowed effortlessly, smooth as silk. But when the YY channel fell silent, he suddenly realized—oops, this was a teammate, not a hookup. Wrong frequency. ╮(╯_╰)╭

But then again, the teammate’s silence was… intriguing.

“Where’d you go=_=? Shy now?”

Fang Zheng gritted his teeth. Who the hell would believe this guy was straight?!

But Fang Zheng had never planned on coming out in-game. He immediately adjusted his tone: “Looking for gloves.”

Jiang Yang was confused: “What for?”

Fang Zheng cracked his knuckles, letting the sound travel through the fiber optic cables straight into the other man’s soul: “So I don’t leave fingerprints when I slap you.”

Jiang Yang muffled a laugh, almost choking: “Go ahead, slap me hard, don’t hold back!”

Asshole vs. asshole—totally infuriating. TAT

“You and Fighter Jet really share the same sense of humor.”

A new voice suddenly piped up in the YY channel, startling both Fang Zheng and Jiang Yang. The former stopped crying, and the latter stopped laughing.

“When did you get here?” Jiang Yang narrowed his eyes, a faint, inexplicable irritation rising in his chest—like being interrupted mid-sneeze.

“Doesn’t matter,” Meng Chudong said, fumbling around his messy desk before finally finding a lighter to light his cigarette. “Since we’re all free, let’s brainstorm a name for the legion.”

Fang Zheng had been worried Polly might pick up on the subtext, but it turned out he’d been overthinking it. Unless you were in the know, who’d notice those subtle undercurrents?

Still, Polly seemed a little different today. Fang Zheng thought about it for a while before realizing: “Birdy, why’s it so quiet on your end?”

Usually, Polly’s YY was always accompanied by background music.

“Oh, not at the internet café today.”

Lu Yue had recently started expanding the café, so the absentee boss, Second Boss Meng, had temporarily moved into Lu’s place, bringing his gaming rig with him. Lu’s apartment was a small one-bedroom, still under mortgage, but since Lu was also a bachelor with no dependents, lending out the living room wasn’t an issue.

The mention of the internet café sent Fang Zheng’s imagination running wild.

Birdy-kun wasn’t an occasional visitor—from the moment they’d met, his YY had been filled with background noise, whether it was noon, afternoon, evening, or the dead of night. But in this era where computers were as common as phones, even a broke-ass NEET like him could stay home and raid. So who still hung out at internet cafés all the time? Students? But could students really stay out all hours without consequence? Which left only one plausible answer: idle street punks…

Damn it! Give back his cool, aloof, dreamy, dashing expert! TAT

Meng Chudong had no idea that his few simple words had sent the healer’s thoughts spiraling around the globe. If he had known, he’d have crawled through the screen to kick that idiot all the way to Neptune.

As for the legion name, the three of them couldn’t come up with anything decent in the YY channel—none of them were the literary type, and everything they brainstormed was either too cliché or totally forgettable. By evening, Fighter Jet and 438 had logged in—

The former: “How about ‘Trample the Calm Waters’? So badass, hahahaha~~~~”

“Mirage Server is already flat without you trampling it!”

The latter: “What about the Bubble Knights?”

“Let’s just wait for Blood Bull…”

True to form, the quasi-female Ph.D. didn’t disappoint. A resounding name was born, unanimously approved—Ghost Server Legion.

2B: “Don’t you think ‘Elite Squad’ sounds better?”

Blood Bull: “Sure, I don’t care.”

Fang Zheng & Jiang Yang & Meng Chudong: “Piss off.”

Fang Zheng & Jiang Yang & Meng Chudong: “Blood Bull, we didn’t mean you.”

With the name settled, founding the legion was a formality. While forming a team for battles required seven members, creating a low-level legion in-game had no restrictions—100 Huaxia Coins, and even if you were the only member, you could still have your little clique. Fang Zheng, elected by the lazy bastards, ran the errand, only to discover a problem when talking to the legion NPC—

“Damn, the person who applies becomes the Legion Commander.”

The YY channel was silent, except for snickering.

He’d been played. TAT

For a seven-person group, being Legion Commander meant nothing but responsibility and obligation—no perks, no benefits.

Biting the bullet, Fang Zheng accepted the role and began sending out invitations to his teammates. Soon, Ghost Server Legion had six members. Fang Zheng then tried to drag someone down with him—

“Who’s gonna be Deputy Commander? Step up! Don’t make me call you out!”

2B: “I’m not leadership material.”

Mad Lad: “Not interested.”

Blood Bull: “Try calling me out.”

438: “I just left my old legion, shouldn’t draw too much attention…”

Everyone took a step back, leaving only Polly, who hadn’t moved, to be selected. ╮(╯_╰)╭

But Polly didn’t refuse either, silently accepting from start to finish. Fang Zheng thought that was pretty decent of him. That was just how Fang Zheng was—if someone wronged him, he’d record it tenfold in his little black book for future revenge. But if someone was good to him, he’d always remember to return the favor, and fast, as if delaying made him less than human.

The new legion members were lively in the legion channel, chatting about everything under the sun, even fantasizing about dominating Huaxia.

Milk is Mom, however, made a trip to the storage before teleporting to Mount Emei.

When Polly saw the healer, he naturally stopped his monkey-slaughtering spree. Fang Zheng covered one eye, unable to bear the sight of that mismatched gear, and clumsily maneuvered Milk is Mom over to Polly, initiating a one-way trade.

[Sparkling Heavenly Lake Tear]

Level 55

Physical Defense +60

The little zombie stood beneath the swaying green trees, motionless for a long moment.

Fang Zheng’s heart suddenly leaped into his throat. Had he screwed up?

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Why so quiet? Lagging?

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Did you get the thing I just gave you?

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: If you tell me it got lost to lag, I’ll lose it. TAT

Finally, Birdy responded—

[Whisper] Polly: I’ve only heard of accounts getting disconnected from lag, not gear.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: So?

[Whisper] Polly: Got it.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: You couldn’t have said that sooner!!!

[Whisper] Polly: Was checking if you sent it to the wrong person.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Then give it back. =_=

[Whisper] Polly: Do you really think that’s possible?

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Shameless~~~~~~~~

[Whisper] Polly: Those soulful tildes betray you.

[Whisper] Polly: Spit it out. What’s the reason?

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: What reason? This necklace was practically made for you~~=_= Your magic resistance is already insane, and now with physical defense too? Damn, Birdy, you’re invincible!!

[Whisper] Polly: This necklace’s been around for a while.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Snarky people are the worst >_<

[Whisper] Polly: Cutesy people aren’t much better.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Go die!

[Whisper] Polly: ^_^

Fang Zheng had come to a realization—against Jiang Yang, he could hold his own. Against an expert like Polly? Instant annihilation. The problem was, this guy hadn’t been like this when they first met. Damn, his evolution speed was ridiculous!!!

Meng Chudong leisurely exhaled a few smoke rings. In the hazy white mist, the cold monitor seemed to come alive, bubbling with the healer’s frustration from the other end of the fiber optic cable.

Meng Chudong chuckled at his own imagination.

Deciphering Milk is Mom’s thoughts was as easy as shelling peanuts—no, easier, since peanuts sometimes resisted. It wasn’t that he was some genius; it was just that the healer was painfully simple. So simple it was… hard to look at.

Huh, now he understood the devastating power of his mismatched gear.

Just as he was lost in thought, a new line of text popped up in the bottom-left corner. Meng Chudong focused on it, froze, then slowly let his smile fade.

[Whisper] Milk is Mom: Consider the necklace my pledge of allegiance. From now on, we’re comrades.

That night, Polly spent the entire evening beating up monkeys on Mount Emei. Before, he’d kept at it out of sheer persistence—no matter how meaningless the drops had become, he couldn’t just quit halfway, and he genuinely wanted to see just how legendary that so-called headgear really was. But tonight, his resolve had changed. If the system still stubbornly refused to drop it, he’d consider hiring a studio team to raze Mount Emei to the ground.

……

Fang Zheng logged in the next afternoon. Standing on Nanjing Road, he opened his friends list with one last shred of hope—The Blesscaller’s name was still gray.

Then a Huaxia Express package arrived for Milk is Mom.

[Golden Hoop]

Level 55

Max HP +17%

Max MP +17%

Physical Resistance +10

Magic Resistance +10

3% chance to revive upon death

Holy shit, the sarcastic zombie bird had been holding out on him?!

The sender wasn’t online, so Fang Zheng couldn’t ask about the origins of this ridiculously overpowered gear. A 17% boost to HP and MP was already top-tier for orange-grade accessories, and combined with the resistances, it was practically godly. But then the brutal 3% death-revival property completely blew his mind, so much so that he forgot to even check Baidu.

Plant a silver ingot in spring, reap a gold bar in autumn.

—That was the perfect metaphor for Fang Zheng’s current state of mind.