Chapter 21. Sea Breeze Part 3

Their voices were loud, there was no way Yin Yan couldn’t hear them. But his hand didn’t pause as he wrote, swiftly completing the check-in process and handing the form to Lu Zhengming.

His handwriting bore clear traces of rigorous training. His regular script carried hints of Yan Zhenqing’s style, while his running script had strokes reminiscent of Dong Qichang, elegant and refined, yet tinged with worldly smoothness. In contrast, Lu Zhengming’s calligraphy, with its casual “Dao Follows Nature” inscription, looked almost sloppy. He subconsciously slowed down his strokes, trying to soften the stark difference between them.

Yin Yan chuckled softly and looked away, and only then did Lu Zhengming’s handwriting relax. Yin Yan excelled in so many aspects that it made Lu Zhengming feel somewhat inferior, but after the brief moment of self-reproach, he figured he was doing fine in his own way. Trying to be like Yin Yan all the time would just be exhausting.

There were no scheduled activities for the day, and the students were free to explore. After giving them a few reminders, the two returned to their room. Lu Zhengming could have taken a single room, but he gave his to Ouyang instead, which meant the student sharing a twin room with Yin Yan had to make way for him.

The moment they stepped inside, before their luggage was even sorted, Yin Yan was pressed against the door, his coat slipping from his body. He sighed helplessly, gripping Lu Zhengming’s hand. “You couldn’t find a chance on the train?”

“Nope. I was holding it in the whole way.” Lu Zhengming panted and bit down on his lips. “Why the hell didn’t the department book soft sleepers…?”

Yin Yan simply smiled, cupping his face and kissing him back. “Can’t wait until tonight?”

Lu Zhengming knew this wasn’t the best time. Students could knock on their door at any moment. But the more he kissed, the harder it was to stop. His arousal pressed against Yin Yan, his frustration written all over his face.

Yin Yan kept kissing him, his hands slowly sliding down. Through the fabric of his shirt, he traced over Lu Zhengming’s chest, his middle finger deliberately circling his nipple, making Lu Zhengming’s breath catch. His breathing grew heavier. Kissing alone wasn’t enough anymore.

“I want you… today, right now… I need to fuck you…”

His voice was hoarse and disjointed, his forehead pressing into Yin Yan’s collar as he inhaled deeply, intoxicated by his scent. Each breath made him harder, more desperate. He was on the verge of forgetting time and place entirely.

Yin Yan’s hands moved lower, wrapping around his waist and kneading his hips. Lu Zhengming hadn’t even realized how sensitive he was there. Wherever Yin Yan touched, his body melted.

He had no idea when his belt was undone. By the time he realized, Yin Yan was already kneeling in front of him, swallowing his cock deep into his mouth.

Lu Zhengming’s back hit the door, his whole body shuddering. He remembered that Yin Yan used to be terrible at this. The first time, back at their graduation exhibition, he had nearly scraped him with his teeth… Fuck! Who the hell was this? His mouth was too good, the suction too tight, the movements so skilled that Lu Zhengming’s legs nearly gave out. He gripped the door handle for support, barely holding himself up.

“Shit—slow down, I’m gonna—fuck—”

His hand flew to Yin Yan’s head, trying to pull him off, but it was too late. Yin Yan’s lips curled into a smirk around his cock, his eyes watching him as he swallowed every drop.

Lu Zhengming let out a broken moan, his orgasm hitting him so hard he thought for sure someone outside had heard. But he couldn’t bring himself to care, because Yin Yan was still smiling.

The aftershocks of pleasure still rolled through him, and through the lingering haze, that smile felt unbearably intimate.

Something in his chest tightened. An ache that was soft, yet unbearably sharp. It was familiar and unfamiliar at the same time, like something he had been chasing but never truly touched before. Every past experience felt like a pale imitation of this moment. Nothing had ever felt this raw.

He grabbed Yin Yan’s face, kissing the corner of his lips, tasting the faint bitterness left behind. He pried his mouth open, deepening the kiss, swallowing down every last trace.

A reckless urge rose inside him to say something, anything. Maybe the kind of messy, thoughtless words he’d gasped out during desperate, lonely nights. But something about this was different. This wasn’t like those moments.

And he didn’t want to ruin it by saying the same things again.

He hesitated, ultimately choosing to stay silent. He didn’t know how to put it into words. If he had a brush and a canvas, maybe he could paint it for Yin Yan instead. The colors and brushstrokes would be more honest, more convincing than anything he could say out loud.

Until then, the only thing he could do was kiss him, sincerely, with all he had.

But the kiss didn’t last long before Lu Zhengming sensed something was off. He could feel the same hardness in Yin Yan’s body, the same growing heat.

“…Sorry.” Lu Zhengming gently guided him toward the bed, intending to take care of him in return.

“I don’t need that.” Yin Yan lightly pushed him away. “I need dinner.”

Lu Zhengming frowned. “Since when were you this obsessed with food?”

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me.” Yin Yan chuckled, then patted his shoulder. “Come on, I’ll take you somewhere good.”

The place he took him to was nothing more than a seaside food stall, serving grilled seafood and other common dishes. A few flimsy folding tables were scattered around, their surfaces covered with tacky floral plastic, surrounded by plastic chairs with the letters “GG” stamped on them. A row of silver beer kegs was stacked like a low wall, and a few large metal basins held live seafood, sloshing with water.

When they arrived, a middle-aged couple was just setting up the grill, fanning the flames as the charcoal caught fire. Yin Yan exchanged a few words with them before grabbing two draft beer mugs, filling them himself. The liquid was golden and clear, the foam thick and rich. The beer from Qingdao was well-known.

Lu Zhengming had been skeptical about Yin Yan’s choice, but after taking a deep swig of the beer, he was instantly convinced. As he peeled the boiled peanuts the owner’s wife had brought over, he glanced around. There were a few other similar stalls nearby, filled with ordinary locals grabbing a bite after work. He couldn’t help but ask, “What’s so special about this place?”

Yin Yan took a sip of his beer and clinked glasses with him. “Nothing. Just a regular street stall.”

Lu Zhengming laughed. “You dragged me all the way here just for this?”

The setting sun cast a soft glow on Yin Yan’s back, blurring the contours of his face. His answer was vague, almost distant.

“It tastes just like it used to.”

Yin Yan faced away from the setting sun, his face slightly blurred, his response inexplicable. “Tastes just like it used to.”

Lu Zhengming thought of that photo. “You used to in Qingdao?”

“I’m from Qingdao.”

It wasn’t peak dining hours yet, so the food arrived quickly. By the time they finished a few exchanges, the table was already filled with dishes. Shell-on snails and clams, meat and fish without shells. The cooking was simple, the seasoning light. Lu Zhengming found himself growing more and more accustomed to Yin Yan’s taste in food. He wasn’t sure if he should be pleased or resigned about it.

“Then why don’t you speak the local dialect? Afraid of embarrassing yourself in front of your students?”

A small mountain of shells had already piled up in front of Lu Zhengming, yet he was still going strong. Yin Yan called the landlady over and ordered a few more dishes. Only after she left did he answer, “I don’t know the dialect.”

“How’s that possible?”

“I never spoke it from the moment I learned to talk. She only let me speak Mandarin.”

“Who?”

“My mom. The woman in that photo on the base wall.”

Lu Zhengming suddenly tensed up. Yin Yan had never talked about his past before, and that trust gave him a sense of anticipation. But Yin Yan merely leaned back in his chair in silence, his hair tousled by the sea breeze, making his face even harder to make out.

The newly ordered dishes arrived quickly. He raised his glass in a toast toward Lu Zhengming and was about to down the half-finished beer. Lu Zhengming, remembering his weak stomach, pressed the glass down. “Don’t.”

Yin Yan smiled indifferently. “Just this once, I don’t feel like accommodating it.”

His rare stubbornness felt new to Lu Zhengming. He wanted to dig deeper but worried it would make Yin Yan put his guard up, so he asked casually, “How long have you had this condition?”

“Since I was little.”

“Born with it?”

“No.”

“Then—”

Yin Yan had already seen through his probing, but alcohol had loosened his guard once again. “From hunger.”

Lu Zhengming didn’t believe it. “Your family was rich. How could you have gone hungry?”

“Hunger isn’t always because of poverty. It was because I did something wrong.”

“What did you do? Was it that serious?”

The sky had completely darkened. The dim lightbulb above their table was now the only source of light. Yin Yan lowered his head, staring at the half-full glass of beer. His face was buried in shadow as he murmured, as if speaking to himself—

“Nothing major. Just getting up too late. Writing too sloppily.”

Lu Zhengming had never suffered hardship before.

He had never even been hit growing up, so he couldn’t imagine what was so punishable about something like that. Staring at the table full of food, he suddenly lost his appetite.

“Don’t waste it.”

Yin Yan picked up a grilled oyster, sipped its juices, and let out a satisfied sigh.

“At that time, this smell drifted in from the window…”

He toyed with the empty shell for a moment before casually tossing it onto the growing pile. He didn’t continue.

The sky was as dark as the sea. Waves rolled out of the black depths, drawing closer and closer until they shattered against the reefs.

The night wind grew stronger, tugging at people’s coats as if trying to snatch them away into the sky. In such a wind, loneliness seemed to settle in easily. People clutched themselves or their partners and quickened their steps, eager to escape.

Lu Zhengming looked at Yin Yan, who was walking slowly with his hands in his pockets, as if long accustomed to this sea breeze. Lu Zhengming felt a sudden urge to be like those people, to sling an arm around Yin Yan’s shoulders. But he wasn’t sure if he had the right, so he simply shoved his hands into his own pockets and gradually matched his pace to Yin Yan’s.

On the way back, they passed through a commercial street. Qingdao, being a port city with a strong light industry sector, had many foreign trade stores along this street, selling everything from furniture and appliances to clothing and daily necessities.

Yin Yan wasn’t interested in any of it. Lu Zhengming, however, was in the mood for some window shopping. Unfortunately, most stores were already closed at this hour, so he could only browse whatever happened to still be open.

Ahead was a home décor store. The display window was filled with gaudy trinkets. Llace tablecloths, metal candle holders, artificial flowers, the kind of things neither of them would ever put in their homes. Yet, Lu Zhengming still pushed open the bell-adorned door.

After walking in the cold wind for so long, he instinctively saw the warmly lit shop as a place to take shelter.

A pleasant fragrance lingered in the air inside, making one unconsciously relax. It had a homely feeling. Yin Yan lingered by the entrance, unwilling to step into such a cozy environment, so Lu Zhengming wandered the store alone.

He took a few steps past the floral-embroidered textiles before quickly losing interest. Declining the store clerk’s assistance, he was about to leave with Yin Yan when he noticed the other man’s gaze frozen on a table by the wall.

It held an assortment of low-temperature candles, some in glass holders, others exposed. Their colors and scents were refined, the source of the shop’s soothing aroma. A few samples burned on a tray, their gentle flames reflecting off the melted wax. Lu Zhengming watched for a while, slowly falling into a drowsy trance.

Then, he naturally recalled Yin Yan’s earlier “tonight”. The warmth of the store took on an entirely different ambiance.

He picked up a black candle, and a certain thought surfaced unguarded.

A restless heat stirred through him.