LS 14
by Nilu“I picked up a really hilarious newbie recently.”
Dohee’s out-of-nowhere confession nearly made Yeohoo spit out his coffee.
“What? Picked up what?”
“A funny little newbie.”
“Huh? In Sword of God?”
“Yeah.”
“What the hell? Didn’t you say you were quitting like ten times today alone?”
“Well, I guess things just turned out that way.”
“…?”
Yeohoo was so dumbfounded he was ready to snort coffee out his nose. Dohee, who kept screaming he was quitting the game every other minute, now suddenly claimed he’d picked up a newbie? Not even today, not even yesterday, recently. Which meant this wasn’t some passing encounter from the last day or two.
“Where?”
“Ladenska outskirts. I was doing the Dawn Rose daily quest.”
“…Randomly?”
“He’s a Support.”
“So you just randomly picked up a newbie Support? Didn’t I tell you ages ago that you’ll get a stomachache if you keep picking up stuff off the ground?”
Yeohoo carefully set his coffee cup down. This wasn’t the first time Dohee had helped out some Support newbie. Among them had been ungrateful jerks who didn’t say thanks, and even a few who turned around and demanded loot as payment.
When Dohee invited him to dinner, Yeohoo had called him over to his place. His dad had visited a few days ago and restocked their kimchi stash, and Yeohoo remembered him saying to share some with Dohee. So he invited him over, thinking he’d give him a few heads of freshly fermented kimchi too. They’d made kimchi stew, eaten, and were now enjoying some coffee before the weekly raid. They were also waiting for Yeojin, who’d gone out saying she had plans.
Honestly, Baek Dohee was impossible to figure out. The way he talked, you’d think he was the most arrogant, cold bastard on earth, completely lacking warmth. And yet, his actions were surprisingly kind. He grumbled and snapped all the time, but he still took care of people. Sometimes Yeohoo wondered, was he just an ill-tempered pushover?
Even after knowing Dohee for 25 years, Yeohoo still couldn’t fully understand him. So how would anyone else?
Out of everyone Yeohoo knew, Baek Dohee had the worst track record with people. No matter how many times he got burned, he couldn’t walk past a pathetic newbie without helping. Hearing it again now, Yeohoo couldn’t help but sigh. Was Dohee getting taken advantage of again by some weirdo?
“They’re not the type to give you a stomachache. They really don’t know anything. I think they’re trying to look things up here and there, but it’s all totally useless stuff.”
“Uh-huh, right, of course.”
“They didn’t even know how to use skills. They’d evenly split his skill points across everything.”
“…Whoa, okay, that’s pretty bad.”
“And there are four life skills in the game, but they only learned one. Gathering. That’s it.”
“…Huh? Why?”
“I asked. Wanna guess what tgey said?”
“I dunno?”
“They said, and I quote, ‘I like plants.’”
“…They’re nuts.”
“Right? But kind of funny, though.”
No, seriously. They sounds nuts.
Yeohoo blinked his wide eyes. That wasn’t just funny, that was weird. He was about to say more but stopped. It was a little funny. Especially because Dohee, as he said it, was smiling.
“They just hit level 21, and already excited about hitting max level.”
“…They really don’t know how the world works, huh.”
“Not just the world. I don’t think they even know how to play the game yet.”
“So?”
“Huh?”
“How long are you gonna drag them around?”
“No idea.”
“Wow. That’s the most infuriatingly irresponsible Baek Dohee statement I’ve ever heard.”
“We’ll see. I mean… once they’re leveled enough to join server raids, they’ll manage on their own, right? They say they’re good at raising plants. They can raise themselves too.”
“True. Getting to level 50’s pretty quick anyway. Could be worth raising him.”
Yeohoo picked up his cup again and drank. He glanced sideways at Dohee. He actually seemed to be enjoying himself, and Yeohoo felt a little more at ease. Maybe Dohee wouldn’t be talking about quitting every other hour, for a little while, anyway.
“So… is it fun?”
The sudden question made Dohee tilt his head. Crack, a nasty pop echoed.
“Ugh, stop doing that.”
Ignoring Yeohoo’s grimace, Dohee spoke evenly.
“It’s not bad. Kinda funny. They never do anything I expected them to. They’re just…”
“Just?”
“Unpredictable?”
“Well, if you’re having fun, that’s all that matters.”
“Thinking I might put them in the guild if they keep it up. They’re weird, yeah, but not in a bad way. And they don’t have a guild yet.”
“Oh boy. Don’t.”
“Why not?”
“Would joining our guild be a good thing for that newbie~ or a bad thing~?”
“Having a guild is a good thing.”
“No, you lunatic. The problem is that it’s our guild.”
Sometimes Baek Dohee completely lacked objectivity. Sure, the guild didn’t go around insulting people’s moms or pulling vile stunts, but it wasn’t like the members were the most stable people either.
After founding the Human, Dohee had only accepted players who had at least one solid ability they could proudly show off. But somehow, that had ended up attracting a bunch of weirdos. A few even had colorful histories in online gossip boards. They might’ve looked normal on the surface, but inside the guild, chaos was the norm.
They weren’t bad people per se… but tossing a completely clueless newbie into that crowd felt a bit morally questionable. It wasn’t hard to believe the twin siblings’ joke, that the guild was named Human ecause it was full of anything but humans.
“They’re not exactly normal either.”
At Dohee’s follow-up, Yeohoo gave a reflexive nod. Well, that changed things.
“So how’d you end up picking them up? Was it just your usual habit of grabbing every Support you see?”
“No. Their username was GoingSupporter.”
“…Huh?”
That reply lagged by a beat as Yeohoo’s brain buffered. What was that supposed to mean? GoingSupporter? But that was him.
“Come again?”
“I went to the hunting grounds and saw some high-level player bullying a newbie in general chat. And that newbie’s name was GOingSupporter.”
“Okay hold up, can you say that in a way a normal person could understand?”
“Not just GOingSupporter. It was capital G, capital O in English then “ingSupporter’ in Korean, and the numbers 1, 8, 7.”
“Uh…”
“You think a name like that wouldn’t stand out?”
“So capital GO, then Korean ‘ingSupporter’, and then 187?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s like… the fakest GoingSupporter knockoff I’ve ever heard.”
“Right? I told them that too.”
“And?”
“They said they were a fan of GoSupp.”
“…Aha.”
Wait a second…
“GoSupp is… you.”
“Yeah..”
“Hold on. So you picked up a newbie, and it turns out they’re a fan of GoingSupporter? And GoingSupporter, that’s you, and you ended up taking in this newbie who made a knockoff name to copy you?”
“Yup. But I picked them up with my AssaGo account.”
“So do they know AssaGo equals GoingSupporter?”
“Nope.”
“Right…”
“I didn’t tell them. Thought it’d be awkward.”
“…Yeah. You’re nuts. Truly my cousin.”
“As soon as we met, they were like, ‘Do you know GoingSupporter?’ and started going on and on about how amazing and cool he is. How the hell am I supposed to go, ‘Yeah, that’s me’? Would you say anything?”
“…Nope.”
“So yeah. That’s what happened.”
That’s what happened. What a magical phrase. Yeohoo quietly glanced over at Dohee sipping his coffee. He was sitting still, but the way he randomly smiled told him he was thinking about that funny little newbie again. Yeohoo scratched his forehead with a sigh.
Whatever. He’ll figure it out. If raising that newbie made quitting less likely, maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing after all. Dohee seemed genuinely amused, and that was probably enough.
While his cousin was lost in thought, Dohee’s mind drifted back to the latest moment he’d shared with that knockoff the night before.
💎
They’d said they usually logged on in the early morning, and it seemed they weren’t lying. Dohee had fallen asleep around evening and woke to find it was nearly 4 a.m. Out of habit, he entered his gaming room, booted up the computer, lit a cigarette, and logged in. His main had already cleared all major raids, so he figured he’d knock out a few minor server raids on AssaGo. He hadn’t expected them to be online.
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: AssaGo-nim! ㅎㅅㅎ
Not even thirty seconds after logging in, a message popped up lightning-fast. Dohee blinked. It was 4:08 a.m., wasn’t it?
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: ?
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: You’re not asleep?
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: I’m still at work… ㅠㅡㅠ
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: What kind of job keeps you up at this hour?
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: Ah!
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: Uh… It’s a secret!
At least he learned something, Dohee had told him not to go giving personal info to random people, and now here he was, proudly announcing “It’s a secret!”
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: What secret lol
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: Cut the crap lmao
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: 8ㅅ8… AssaGo-nim, you’re so mean… You’re the one who said not to tell random people…
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: And I’m random to you?
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: Uh… no?
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: Then?
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: You’re a good person!
[Whisper] To GOingSupporter187: So…?
[Whisper] GOingSupporter187: ㅎㅁㅎ… I work a night shift at an internet**. 1피시방” (internet café ot PC bang), but the system automatically filtered the “시방” part because it looks like a swear.
See? Should’ve just said that in the first place. What “secret”? Dohee snorted. This kid, sitting on one of the biggest secrets ever, had the gall to scold someone else about oversharing.

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