LS 77

Dohee hadn’t been able to quit SoGod, not completely. Maybe it was just attachment. Or maybe it was nothing more than stubborn spite.

In any case, after he and Yeohoo poured a ridiculous amount of time and money into forming the Human guild and finally achieved the Snow Witch first clear, all he felt afterward was emptiness.

Like he’d lost his sense of direction. He hadn’t been joking when he said he was quitting. If he hadn’t met Moonhyuk, maybe he really would have.

As Dohee replayed the past in his mind, Jinhee’s voice filtered into his ear.

— “You never know. It might actually be even better now.”

Dohee blinked. Better?

“What might?”

— “I mean… streaming. Things are way different now than they were back then. That was the early phase of the game, right? Hardly anyone had alts. Everyone was just focused on raising one main character. It got overheated fast. But now there are way more players who’ve tried playing support. And honestly, viewer culture’s a lot tamer than before. Plus, it’s easier to deal with trolls now. And like you said, 80% of the people who gave you shit back then are probably long gone by now. If you started streaming again now, the ones who’d come running are people who’ve just been waiting for you to return. So really, it’s not like it could be worse. If anything, it’d probably be better, don’t you think?”

Dohee stayed silent, listening to Jinhee ramble on.

“If anything, it’d probably be better, don’t you think?”

He couldn’t say that was wrong.

Yeah, how could things get any worse than they were then?

Jinhee’s point was clear: he’d already experienced the worst. There was nothing left to be afraid of.

After the Xeno raid team had disbanded the first time, Jinhee had quit SoGod not long after.

Even when their old days came up in conversation, they’d just mention it in passing and move on.

There was no reason to keep dragging up unpleasant memories.

Jinhee would sometimes ask, “Have you thought about streaming again? You know people still like you.”

And Dohee would give the same old refusal every time.

But this was the first time Jinhee had tried so seriously to convince him.

“…I don’t know,” Dohee said honestly.

He really didn’t. He liked streaming. It was fun. It was exciting.

Thinking about doing it again even made his heart flutter a little.

But that wasn’t everything.

It felt like he was just one step away, one single step, and yet something kept blocking him from taking it.

— “Just think it over. I’m being serious this time. You haven’t even logged into your account since you quit, right? Try going in and checking your messages, the comments. People really are still waiting for you. I get what you’re worried about. But maybe it’s not worth worrying over. Just don’t give up before you even try. It’s still something you really love, right?”

Jinhee’s voice was more sincere than ever. Out of everyone, he’d been the one closest to Dohee during his streaming days.

He knew better than anyone just how much Dohee had enjoyed it.

And yet, for some reason, even someone who always lived on impulse like Dohee…

This time, he couldn’t act on instinct.

He couldn’t remember ever feeling so stuck in his life.

Baek Dohee’s turned into a real coward, he thought.

— “Hello?”

“Ah. Yeah.”

— “Did I just mess with your head again…?”

“You already said everything you wanted. What’s with the regrets now?”

— “Whatever, fuck it. Why are people so desperate to tear someone down all the time? Just do it! Stream again!”

“What’s with you? You’re loud.”

— “I don’t know. Just thinking about how you quit still pisses me off. It sucks.”

He sounded like he was grumbling, but the worry and sadness were clear in his voice.

Dohee couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. It was more of a snort than a laugh, but still.

“I’ll think about it. For real this time.”

— “You mean it? Huh? Really think it over, okay?”

“Yeah.”

Leaving Jinhee’s high-pitched voice behind, Dohee pressed the end call button.

Even though he said he’d think about it, his mind wouldn’t quiet down.

As soon as the call ended, silence filled the house.

He kept sighing without meaning to.

💎

Knockoff

I just finished tutoring! ㅎㅅㅎ

Should I come now…?

I even packed my clothes.. 8ㅅ8

A small laugh slipped out. He’d been feeling down all day, but surprisingly, just one message from Moonhyuk on GameTalk had him grinning. Dohee quickly sent a reply.

Me

Should I come pick you up?

The reply came instantly.

Knockoff

No!!!

I’ll be there really soon…ㅠㅡㅠ

If I take the bus, I’ll get there quickly.

You don’t have to bother picking me up..8ㅅ8

Me

Knockoff

ㅋㅋㅋㅋ I’m about to get offended

You really hate being picked up that much?

It’s not that. 8ㅅ8

Me

It’s not?

Knockoff

I just thought it might be a hassle for you…ㅠㅡㅠ

Me

When will you finally realize that I’m not even 0.1g annoyed by you?

Me

Hurry over ㅋㅋ

Once you get here, we’ll have dinner and finish the hidden quest.

Noodle said he’ll do a reinforcement show later, let’s watch while doing the hidden stuff ㅋㅋ

Knockoff

Okaaay

I just got on the bus!!! ㅎㅅㅎ

Knockoff

I’ll be there soon…!

Dohee replied instantly.

And Moonhyuk answered just as fast.

He didn’t know why, but the words “I’ll be there soon” looked so beautiful.

Moonhyuk had said he’d come straight over after tutoring, clothes and all.

Just that was enough to lift Dohee’s mood.

Honestly, he wished he could just convince Moonhyuk to stay over permanently.

Their relationship hadn’t progressed a single step, but his heart was full of nothing but want.

He opened the lid of a box he’d taken out. It had been tucked away neatly in the game room storage. He’d thought he’d never have to open it again…

But who knows. People’s hearts really are fickle as hell.

Inside were the expensive streaming gear he’d bought, camera, mic, earphones, a bunch of compact equipment all stacked neatly.

Just seeing it stirred something in him.

If he checked the utility closet off the game room, the handcam lighting was probably still there too.

He hadn’t opened this box once since quitting streaming.

Dohee quietly stared at the equipment. He really had been loved, enough to miss it. Money had never been a problem in his life.

But when streaming took off, subscriptions and donations brought in a decent income.

Thanks to all the support and materials people sent him, he hit max level faster than anyone.

GoingSupporter wasn’t a character he raised alone. It had been raised by the love and interest of others.

Maybe that was why it meant even more to him. Once he started uploading videos, his revenue grew fast.

He hadn’t done much sponsorship aside from PC gear, but even when he did post one, fans rushed to buy whatever he recommended.

They’d leave comments full of jokes and support. Dohee sat blankly, Jinhee’s words echoing in his mind:

— “I get what you’re worried about. But maybe it’s not worth worrying over. Just don’t give up before you even try. It’s still something you really love, right?”

He let out a long sigh and collapsed into the chair.

He’d opened the box of streaming equipment on impulse, but all it did was make things more complicated.

He didn’t even know what he wanted anymore.

His emotions poured out, raw and tangled.

Then, he heard the beeping of the door lock code being entered.

Dohee shot to his feet. Moonhyuk had arrived. Last time he’d walked Moonhyuk home, Dohee had handed him the building’s entry card key.

He’d also told him the door code.

He’d worked hard to convince him: it was okay to come by anytime, even if no one was home.

He’d resisted, but Dohee had won. And now, hearing that keypad beep, all his messy thoughts flipped into a fluttering excitement.

“Uh… are you home…?”

The tiny voice from the entryway made Dohee burst into laughter.

Stepping out of the game room, he called out:

“I’m home.”

“I, uh, just let myself in… I was gonna ring the bell, but…”

Moonhyuk looked sheepish as he took off his scarf, mumbling softly.

“I didn’t want to bother you… I brought clothes!”

Then he quickly kicked off his shoes, stepped into the living room, and held out the shopping bag like it was some prize.

What was he even expecting? Confirmation?

“You want me to check what color they are or something?”

“Ah…”

Moonhyuk’s face turned bright red.

Why is he so goddamn cute? Dohee wanted to bite him. Or hug him tight and never let go. It was torture not being able to do either.

He glanced into the bag Moonhyuk held out, then naturally took the scarf from his hands.

“I’ll hang it up in the dressing room. The plaid’s cute.”

One of these days, he really had to go to Moonhyuk’s place and flip his wardrobe upside down.

Not that plaid was the problem, but seriously, how many types of plaid did the guy own?

Maybe it was time to throw some things out. Buy him some new stuff.

With that body and height, he’d look good in anything.

“You hungry?”

Dohee came out after hanging Moonhyuk’s now-familiar puffer in the dressing room and asked.

It was nearly dinnertime.

Moonhyuk, still standing awkwardly in the living room, swallowed hard.