LDR Ch 21

Even Leo hated himself from that time. He also could not understand why he did not know. In truth, even if he had known the truth back then, he had no idea what he would have done, but in any case, he thought it would have been better than not knowing at all.

Harrison, who had been stealthily taking steps backward each time he spoke, finally realized his back was against a wall and he could retreat no further, so he tried to get away. But when Leo blocked his way again, he finally spoke.

“I don’t know.”

Even as he said it, his ears were dyed red, telling the truth.

“Why didn’t you hate me? You did hate me, right?”

“I told you I didn’t, really.”

“Then?”

“It was just because you were pretty.”

His voice, as if it had leaped over a decade to return to the past, continued, laced with shyness.

“How can I hate someone who is pretty. You were pretty even when you talked about your girlfriend in front of me. I never hated you.”

Leo closed the slightly ajar bathroom door and gently pressed his lips against his.

“Then have you ever wanted to hate me?”

With Harrison right in front of him, he too felt as if he had leaped over the long ten years and was standing here as his past self. The Leo from back then would surely have pressed to find out who the person Harrison liked was, and if he had known that person had ignored Harrison’s feelings for years, he would have hated them. Then and now, even if they went back not just ten but another twenty years, Leo had always liked and cherished Harrison.

“Why?”

“Then I could stop liking you.”

At Leo’s words, Harrison smiled.

“Why would I force myself to hate you. You were my family back then too.”

Then, his hand gently stroked his forehead.

“Leo, turn on the shower.”

At those words, Leo also smiled and led Harrison further into the bathroom. First, they turned on the shower and kissed outside the shower stall, then they naturally started taking off each other’s clothes. As they let their clothes fall carelessly to the floor and groped each other’s bodies, Harrison pulled Leo close and stepped into the shower stall.

As they kissed while being drenched by the water pouring from the showerhead, their slippery, wet bodies pressed together. As he put his hand into his wet hair, Harrison’s hand moved past Leo’s waist and slowly traveled up his back. The smooth and sleek sensation of his fingers tracing the indented line of his spine made him press their bodies closer…, and then the sound of a dog barking came from outside.

Leo and Harrison simultaneously opened the shower stall and looked at the closed bathroom door. Ever since they brought the dogs to this house, the only place they could have sex was the bathroom. Not only the bedroom, but if they closed the door anywhere else, the dogs would somehow know and immediately come running, scratching at the door, whimpering to be let in, and later, barking as if they were getting annoyed.

The bathroom had been the sole exception until now, but it seemed it was now included in their patrol area. It seemed the dogs had gotten annoyed now because they could not hear the door scratching and whimpering over the sound of the shower.

“We’re in trouble. This doesn’t work anymore either.”

Leo sympathized wholeheartedly with Harrison’s sense of dismay.

“I’ll go, so you stay and shower.”

“No. You played with them all day today. You stay and shower. I’ll open the door.”

With those words, Leo gave Harrison a regretful kiss on the cheek, then roughly threw on a bathrobe and opened the door. The three dogs waiting in front of the door gave Leo a prim look, as if to ask why he was only opening it now, and then went straight into the bathroom. Then, after looking around inside, they started scratching at the gap in the closed shower stall, as if wanting to open it.

Leo tried to bring the dogs over, but before he could, the shower stall door opened a crack, and Harrison bent his head down to look at the dogs.

“If you guys come in here, you have to take a bath. Are you going to take a bath? Huh?”

At those words, the dogs immediately ran to Leo, who was by the doorway. Harrison smiled as he watched the dogs and Leo, then closed the shower stall door again.

Leo, who also smiled naturally at the sight, postponed his thought of going to the other bathroom to shower for a bit and went to sit on the edge of the bathtub next to the shower stall. At that, the dogs hovered around but could not easily approach the bathtub where they always had their baths.

“Come here. It’s not scary.”

When he got completely inside the bathtub and gestured to the dogs, the three of them exchanged glances with each other.

“Here.”

When he extended his hand all the way, only then did the dogs hesitantly circle the bathtub. It’s still not enough. Leo looked around, found the toy they used when bathing the dogs, and shook it gently in his hand.

As the rubber duck squeaked, the dogs finally came closer. Leo lifted them into the bathtub one by one and placed the toy in front of them. They’re not scared of baths, so why are they scared of the bathtub. Is it because it’s too big. He picked one up and spun it around so it could see the whole bathtub, and seeing that it looked fun, the other dogs pawed at his arm, asking to be lifted up too.

“What are you doing?”

Even after giving each of them a tour of the bathtub, they endlessly begged him to do it again, and as he was preoccupied with that for a while, a voice suddenly made Leo raise his head. He had been so focused on playing that he hadn’t even noticed the sound of the water had stopped, but Harrison, who had just stepped out of the shower stall, was smiling as he looked at Leo and the dogs.

With one dog in each hand and another on his lap, Leo looked at Harrison. His body, just out of the shower and drying off, was something he saw all the time, but he always found himself looking at it again and again.

Droplets of water fell from his soaked and darkened hair, landing on his straight nape. Then his solid shoulders moved, and the tightly-knit muscles of his back traced the movement along with them. Below the silhouette that tapered sharply from his broad shoulders down to his waist….

“Not there, you should be looking here.”

Harrison, while putting on his bathrobe, pointed once to his body, and then to his face. At that, Leo hastily lifted his gaze. Harrison’s face, when they met eyes, was full of a playful smile. Harrison walked right up to the bathtub, placed his hands on the rim for support, and gave Leo a firm kiss.

Harrison then took the dogs out one by one, hugged them tightly, and gave them firm kisses just as he had done to Leo. Then this time, he cupped Leo’s cheeks firmly with both hands and gave him a playful, firm kiss, just as he had with the dogs.

“I will look after the babies. Now it is time for the young master to wash.”

The words came as he helped Leo up out of the bathtub as if he were taking him out like the dogs. This time, it was Leo who pulled Harrison’s neck towards him, gave him a firm kiss, and smiled.

“Keep a good eye on the kids.”

“Okay. Let’s have some snacks, snacks.”

Even though they had only looked at each other for a moment, ignoring the dogs, they were already whimpering. Harrison, speaking to them, led them out of the bathroom, then stopped at the doorway and turned around just before closing the door.

“Leo, while you’re washing, think about how we’re going to solve our disaster.”

“Is there a solution?”

“No. But you’re smart.”

Harrison then picked up one particularly fussy dog, rubbed it against his own head like a towel, and went out. After confirming this, Leo too entered the shower stall. The bathroom was the last remaining place. So now there was no place in this house for just the two of them. What should we do. Should we send the dogs to our parents’ house or to Heather and Bill whenever we want to do it? But wouldn’t that be too obvious.

Leo realized he was becoming seriously worried and let out a hollow laugh. Then, after finishing his shower and heading to the bedroom, he saw Harrison, still with his hair undried, playing with the dogs on the bed.

The line of his chest was revealed through the loosened bathrobe, caused by his body bending over to shake a toy.

“We’re in real trouble.”

As he spoke seriously while properly closing Harrison’s bathrobe, Harrison lifted his head. Then his hand, unlike Leo’s, slyly opened Leo’s bathrobe.

“I know, right.”

At that, the dogs started whimpering, asking why he wasn’t shaking the toy for them anymore. At the sight, Harrison expertly handed a toy over to Leo.

After playing with the dogs like that, it was already night, and when it was time to sleep, as always, the dogs were between Harrison and Leo, so they could not even hope to touch each other’s bodies. Coming home from work, eating dinner, playing with the dogs, and then sleeping together just like that. Isn’t this daily life closer to that of a 62-year-old couple rather than a 26-year-old one. No, that would be an insulting thought to 62-year-olds.

Leo looked at Harrison’s face, who had given him his arm as a pillow. It was not difficult to superimpose the faces of his 16-year-old and 6-year-old selves onto this face. But this time, a little differently, he imagined the faces of his 36-year-old, 46-year-old, 56-year-old, and even further-in-the-future selves.

How can one imagine what one has not seen. Would his hair be mixed with white, and would deep and faint lines settle on his skin. Perhaps the shape of his eyebrows, or the corners of his mouth, might even change.

Leo quietly tried to imagine something on that face, to superimpose some image. The image changed and changed, until in reality, there was no image at all. So Leo simply took in the Harrison beside him now, the 26-year-old, soon to be 27-year-old Harrison he knew best.

Finally, he closed his eyes and thought. Can you imagine your 36-year-old, 46-year-old, 56-year-old, and even further-in-the-future self.

In the first place, there wasn’t a very long break between the end of the season and the awards ceremony, but just as they say good times pass especially quickly, it felt like they had barely rested at all, and it was already the day before the awards ceremony.

“Where did you guys decide to go for training this time?”

As he asked while driving Harrison to the airport, Harrison glanced at Leo. At that, Leo’s casual attitude also turned serious.

“Tell me quickly.”

“Diego wanted to go to Ibiza,”

“Are you crazy?”

“But it’s close, and since it’s winter,”

“No.”

Ibiza was the center of club culture. Of course, winter was the off-season, so most of the clubs were closed, but still, some places were open. And he was going to go there?

“I said I didn’t want to go either.”

Harrison said it as if he deserved praise for stating the obvious.

“Is it Diego’s turn?”

Harrison nodded at Leo’s question. Harrison, along with his trainer and a few other drivers, went on a physical training-slash-vacation every winter, and they took turns choosing the destination.

“Just go somewhere reasonable like Guam or Hawaii.”

The pretext was training, but in reality, the training camp was more like friends just going on a trip together. The whole thing had started in the first place because Leo had told Harrison to please hang out with friends other than his work colleagues. Though in the end, the people who gathered were just his own trainer and drivers from various categories.

“He says he hates America.”

Diego, who had been on the same team as Harrison in F2, was now in IndyCar, so it was understandable that he wanted to get away from America, but saying no to even Guam and Hawaii seemed like he was setting the scope too broadly.

“Tell him you’ll meet any condition as long as it’s not Ibiza.”

“How cool.”

The words were spoken with the thought of just avoiding Ibiza, but what came back was an exclamation containing a bit of teasing. Leo gave Harrison a short glare.

“Do you like being called pretty more?”

At those words, Leo finally couldn’t hide his smile, and at the same time, Harrison’s phone suddenly vibrated. Leo paid no mind and kept driving, but when Harrison did not answer, he felt it was strange and looked to his side.

“Why?”

“Uh….”

Harrison showed his screen to Leo just as it was. Leo immediately pulled the car over nearby. The Ferrari team principal’s name was displayed on the screen.

“What are you doing? Are you crazy? Answer it!”

“Answer it?”

Of course he should answer it; he could not understand what on earth he was talking about. Fearing the call might disconnect, Leo snatched the phone, pressed the call button, and immediately held it to Harrison’s ear. No one is unaware of the prestige Ferrari holds in motorsport. Even in seasons with poor results, there is a whole crowd of drivers who would join for its history and glory, and this season, they even won the championship. And he was contemplating whether to answer?

“Yes. I’m on my way to the airport now. You’re coming, right? Yes. That would be great. I did hear about Renzo’s matter.”

Hearing Lorenzo’s name mentioned, it was just as expected. After Lorenzo said he would retire, there had been no news articles, so he had wondered if perhaps he had reversed his decision after discussing it with the team, but it seemed closer to the team finally accepting that they could no longer hold on to Lorenzo. That means one seat would be open, and for that seat, Harrison was the number one contender on the current grid.

“I think Leo and I are the only ones who know right now. As far as I know, he hasn’t told anyone else. At least within the paddock.”

As Leo was next to him, relaying the current situation to Harrison’s manager, Christopher, he suddenly felt a gaze on him. Without even raising his eyes, Leo typed on the messaging screen where he was contacting Christopher and showed it to Harrison.

[Think only of your career]

Of course, they must not lose Harrison. Since Nate lacked experience, the current team was inevitably, or intentionally, revolving around Harrison. Next season’s car had been developed especially to suit Harrison, so his departure would be a huge loss. Besides, it was already December, so it would be hard to find a driver.

Although they had sent a junior they had been raising since the Ellington days to another team to develop last year, next year would only be his second season. With Nate also being inexperienced, they could not put a driver who had just shed his rookie status into the seat vacated by Harrison.

Then they would have to poach a driver with considerable years of experience from another team, and putting aside the penalty fees for poaching, there was no driver they were certain they could poach in the first place. Therefore, Leo should have prevented Harrison from answering that call in the first place, but far from regretting it, Leo now informed Heather, who was in charge of Harrison’s PR, of the situation.

[Tell Harry NOT! to promise! ANYTHING! Absolutely!!!]

At the message that arrived from Christopher, Leo showed the sentence to Harrison.

“My contract period is not over yet, but yes, that is true. That is confidential, so it’s difficult for me to say right now, but yes, I’m fine with it, but I’m not sure if I can make separate time since I’m going with Anna as a partner, yes. That time is fine.”

[Harry: The details are managed by my manager, so I’ll have to discuss it. I’ll tell my manager to contact you. Thank you for calling.]

When a whole script arrived, Leo showed the screen to Harrison again.

“The details are managed by my manager, so I will discuss those clauses with my manager. I’ll tell him to contact you right away. Thank you for calling. Yes, it would be good to talk more at the awards ceremony.”

The moment Harrison hung up, Leo called Christopher.

“Chris, where are you now?”

[I’m at home now, is Harry still on the phone?]

“He just hung up. It seems they said they’d talk at the awards ceremony. You head to France right now too.”

[Got it.]

It was a relief that Christopher’s house was in Monaco, which was right next to France where this season’s awards ceremony was being held.

[But, uh, are you okay?]

“I’m not okay, but I won’t get in the way, so keep me updated on the situation.”

Of course, he would not be okay regardless, but Leo ended the call with those words for now.

“I don’t think I’ll go.”

But at the voice from right beside him, Leo asked as he drove towards the airport again.

“Why?”

“I would be the second driver.”

Harrison had a significant trauma related to being a second driver, an experience anyone could understand. And, the team that just made the offer already has a long-standing first driver. Lorenzo, who became champion this time, was also a second driver.

“It’s different from back then. It’s just a title.”

But that was largely a matter of courtesy. Everyone knew that Elias, the current first driver, was retiring after next season.

“I need that too.”

Leo found Harrison to be remarkable anew. Of course, there is no rule that says a driver like that cannot exist. But it was certainly an unusual case.

“Be sure to call me when you get there. As soon as you arrive.”

As he was contemplating whether he should tell Simon about this or wait, the sight of the quickly approaching airport made him speak, and Harrison answered as he got out of the car.

“Okay.”

And seeing him take his luggage from the back seat, Leo suddenly added a word.

“If they suggest going to Monaco, say no.”

France and Monaco are right next to each other, and many people living in Monaco came to the awards ceremony. That meant there was a very high possibility they would suggest going there together for an after-party.

“You were the one who told me to live there.”

Of course, he had. For one, Monaco is tax-free. That is why everyone lived in Monaco. But it was Harrison himself who had said he did not want to because although it would be easy to get to the circuit, the journey to the headquarters would be long.

“Living there and visiting for fun are different.”

At Leo’s words, Harrison briefly looked around, then pulled Leo in.

“Okay. See you in a few days.”