MFW 19

Chapter 19

That evening, Fu Siting emerged from the shower to find Li Fei reading by the bedside lamp as usual. Only today, he wore glasses. A pair of gold-rimmed spectacles connected by a long chain.

Fu Siting: “…”

Fu Siting: “……………”

For a moment, even the air in the bedroom felt thinner. His breathing grew suddenly rough. Speechless, he climbed into bed. He’d been quite drowsy, but now he wasn’t sleepy at all.

Li Fei lifted his gaze from the book and glanced over, pretending it was casual. As expected, there was no one in this world who could properly resist a “wolf in sheep’s clothing” or a “cultured scoundrel.”

He silently watched Fu Siting toss and turn until the boy was nearly consumed by restlessness. Only then did he slowly lean down, his glasses chain dangling. “Xiaoting, why aren’t you sleeping?”

Yes, he wasn’t playing fair. Li Fei refused to believe that even now, he couldn’t outmaneuver sixteen-year-old Fu Siting.

Yes, he had agreed to take Fu Siting back under his wing. But nurturing was one thing, did he really have to turn his boyfriend into a younger brother? Though perhaps that would be better for the sixteen-year-old Fu Siting’s physical and mental health. But the current situation was this: not only did the sixteen-year-old Fu Siting remain indifferent to him, he even looked at dogs with more affection than at Li Fei. So who was going to look after his physical and mental health?

Under the dim yellow light.

He leaned closer, and Fu Siting’s breathing faltered, his gaze noticeably unfocused. Li Fei smirked inwardly, his dark eyes fixed on the youth as he asked his question with unwavering certainty: “Why aren’t you sleeping? What are you thinking about?”

“I… wanted to ask.”

Fu Siting swallowed, his eyes drifting downward to meet Li Fei’s collarbone and the rich texture of his black bathrobe. He froze entirely. Li Fei waited.

“I wanted to ask… Can Cheese Baby sleep in our bed?”

Li Fei: “…”

Li Fei: “……………”

“No.” =_=#

Of course not. Fu Siting understood. Though Li Fei indulged him immensely, there were limits.

“The puppy even went to play in the garden this evening, and its paws are filthy.”

Besides, they’d already bought a dog bed, a soft, triangular one. Unfolding it would be perfect for Cheese to sleep on. The puppy liked it too. They couldn’t let those dirty little paws mess up their mattress. Fu Siting reflected earnestly. Truthfully, just sleeping in this bed these past few days felt like sacrilege.

Li Fei: “…”

He was defeated. High schoolers were terrifying. Innocent and pure to a frightening degree! So all these days of holding hands, caressing, hugging, and subtle temptations hadn’t worked on him at all?

What a waste, he’d even donned his battle armor and wielded the golden-edged weapon. And all this guy could think about was bringing the dog to bed?

For a moment, Li Fei couldn’t be bothered with this guy. High school boys were untouchable. But after lying silently for a while, he changed his mind. If he was going to break down, they’d break down together.

“It’s not because of the paws.”

“Hm?”

“It’s not because the puppy’s paws are dirty,”

Li Fei said. It was already 11 PM. Tree shadows swayed outside the window, and the summer breeze was a little hot.

Li Fei sat in the darkness, his expression cold, until he pulled Fu Siting into his arms. Only when he felt the other’s ears grow instantly hot did his mood improve slightly.

“Fu Siting, listen carefully. Cheese can sleep in bed too.”

“But in this house, only one of the pets is allowed on the bed. If it sleeps here, the other one can’t.”

“Think it through.”

The “pet” lay in his arms, silent for a long moment. In the moonlight, Li Fei even caught a fleeting expression on his face, one that looked genuinely satisfied and flattered, like a real little animal. It took another ten minutes of lying there before Fu Siting finally processed it. His breathing hitched.

“No.”

“Hm?”

“I’m not… a little…” He wasn’t a pet.

He panicked. Finally panicked. Li Fei grabbed his struggling arms.

“I’m joking! How could I possibly treat Xiaoting like a pet?”

“…”

“Of course I treat Xiaoting like… my own little brother.”

“Or, given our age gap now, like my own nephew?”

The room fell suddenly silent.

Someone pursed his lips, refusing to speak. Li Fei had finally won. A mature man with gold-rimmed glasses couldn’t seduce a high schooler? Well, at least when it came to teasing the high schooler Xiaoting, it should be a piece of cake.

[Three sentences to make Fu Xiaoting lose his temper.]

… A world of mutual harm was achieved.

Sixteen-year-old Xiaoting was genuinely furious, refusing even to take his hand. Fine, show some backbone. Some people were just inherently dark and stubborn, whether sixteen or twenty-eight. Li Fei wasn’t going to indulge him. He’d won anyway, time to sleep! In a daze, someone quietly, sulkily reached for his wrist. Li Fei smirked triumphantly before drifting off.

…

The next morning, Li Fei woke to find his pillow Xiaoting missing from his embrace. The other side of the bed was empty. Li Fei searched the entire villa. A delicious aroma wafted from the kitchen. The breakfast on the warming looked and smelled perfect, Xiaoting had cooked him preserved egg and lean pork congee. Beside a plate of small pan-fried dumplings, someone had drawn a sun and a smiling face with soy sauce.

“…”

Li Fei froze for a moment.

Some people, even after twelve years, never lose their little habits. He still loved using sauces to draw adorable things for him. In the garden, the puppy was already chasing butterflies in the morning sun. Li Fei looked down, but Fu Siting wasn’t beside it either. Finally, Li Fei found Fu Siting in the toy room. He sat on the floor quietly arranging Legos, his back looking a bit lonely.

To be precise, he was trying to find a home for the new black cat and little fox. Among the many streetscapes and castles built from identical blocks, he tried countless arrangements. No matter how he arranged them, the cat and fox always seemed to be holding paws.

Twenty-eight-year-old Fu Siting, whenever he upset Li Fei, would always place the paired dolls together in a particularly conspicuous spot. Seeing that, Li Fei would find it hard to stay angry.

“…”

He suddenly regretted the words he’d spoken last night. He deeply regretted them.

He really… had reverted to his old self. Why had he argued with an amnesiac? If the high school boy couldn’t grasp his charm, that was one thing. But Fu Siting, his own age, should understand. What was he even fighting about? Fu Xiaoting was already withdrawn, why was he picking on him? The final spot Fu Siting placed the cat and fox was within a massive Chinese food street he’d spent months assembling two years prior.

The cat and fox held sugar-coated hawthorn berries and zongzi, strolling beneath bustling pavilions and towers, passing steaming buns shops.

…

Fu Siting sat in the toy room until ten o’clock. Was Li Fei still asleep? If awake, did he still refuse to acknowledge him…

Finally, overcome by loneliness, he stepped out of the room only to find the bedroom already empty. His heart sank, and he wandered listlessly into the living room. Then, facing the mountain of snacks piled on the table, his eyes suddenly widened. The elegant white fairy-tale-style table was nearly submerged beneath a tidal wave of snack bags. Colorful bags and jars piled layer upon layer, pressed tightly together. Just from a quick glance, Fu Siting could see puffed potato chip bags, transparent chocolate tins, crystal-clear jelly cups, and tin cookie boxes printed with little bears…

Fu Siting: “…”

Was today some kind of holiday? His first thought was Christmas scenes from movies. For a split second, he even imagined the living room adorned with fairy lights, streamers, and a Christmas tree, snow blanketing the world outside the window. But it was clearly the sweltering summer. …

Li Fei leaned against the side hallway, arms crossed, watching Fu Siting stand motionless before the table for what felt like an eternity. After a long while, he finally moved, drifting toward the table like a ghost—expressionless, silent, and cautious. Another moment passed before he tentatively stroked one of the potato chip bags with an uncertain hand.

The plastic made a sound, and he immediately stopped, afraid to touch it again.

“…”

Li Fei’s eyes darkened. Fu Siting’s childhood deprivation extended beyond toys, clothes, and books, it encompassed all sorts of little snacks that once made his heart flutter.

In his youth, he had yearned to taste the sodas classmates casually opened and gulped down after PE class, the thick yogurt scooped with spoons, the fragrant bagged nuts, and fruits less common in their region like blueberries and lychees. But by the time he truly achieved success, those things no longer held the same allure.

There might be a touch of stubbornness in this, but more than that, Fu Siting feared that if he ever started indulging in snacks, it would spiral out of control just like his shopping habits.

At twenty-eight, Fu Siting ate healthily, disciplined himself, and avoided snacks entirely. Yet suppression couldn’t extinguish the desires buried deep within. At least in Li Fei’s view, those appetites painfully repressed ultimately found their outlet in the same frenzy that drove him to buy toys. Thus, when collecting figurines, his favorite subjects remained snack streets, candy shops, stalls, and stores.

The massive Chinese food street set at home was the largest and most time-consuming Lego build Fu Siting had ever undertaken. He even redesigned the street himself, adding countless little shops, sushi stalls, dumpling stands, ramen carts, rice cake vendors, and so many, many more snack spots. …

Li Fei’s only solace was that though his boyfriend usually put on a brave front, diligently hiding all his pain, at least after each tipsy night, he could always coax out some of that vulnerability he never showed otherwise.

Fu Siting would ramble with red eyes after drinking, saying, “I always go crazy. You’ll stop liking me sooner or later.”

Li Fei would gently hold him and say, “Of course not.”

Fu Siting would also say, “I’m not nearly as good as you think. You’d be scared if you saw the real me.”

Li Fei felt helpless about this, for he never loved the version of Fu Siting who put on a brave front. He would tell him, “I can accept your flaws, your lowest moments. You have to try trusting me.”

But these words, repeated time and again, were always forgotten the moment Fu Siting woke up. His most recent drunkenness had actually occurred not long before he fell down the stairs.

That time, Li Fei finally coaxed him into confessing: he actually loved those sweet sparkling waters, crispy potato chips, and cakes, but he’d been fighting the urge. He feared that indulging would make Li Fei’s beloved abs disappear. In this world, the only thing he’d never give up no matter the cost was Li Fei’s affection.

“…”

Pretty heavy, huh? It was heavy, but Li Fei knew from the start that he carried that weight. He needed that weight. A man like him, who trusted no one easily, actually needed something incredibly heavy, something to press down on his heart. But it also broke his heart, the self-inflicted torment within that weight. Honestly, it was just some snacks.What harm could a few occasional treats do? As an actor who needed to look good on camera, Li Fei knew he couldn’t pull off the extreme feats some people boasted about, like “never eating ice cream again after becoming a dancer” or “only taking three bites per meal after becoming an actor.”

When he craved something, he’d sneak chips or soda, maybe feel a little guilty afterward and work out a bit harder.

Ordinary people shouldn’t be too hard on themselves, otherwise, they’d break down someday. Small desires? Eat when you should, possess what you want, satisfy yourself when needed. Life requires little indulgences, guilty pleasures, to sustain long-term perseverance. So these past years, he’d been trying to guide him.

When Fu Siting stubbornly refused to treat himself, he’d secretly buy treats. When Fu Siting stubbornly held on, he’d charm him into a daze before quietly breaking through his defenses. He just wanted him to know that being a little kinder to himself wasn’t so scary. “All these are for you.”

Now he tried to compensate him once more. He approached from behind, seized Fu Siting’s hand, and placed it on the snacks without explanation. “Which one would you like to try first, Xiaoting?”

“I said I’d take care of you.”

His dark eyes met Fu Siting’s as the chain of his glasses dangled at his temple. “Here’s the deal: from now on, every month on this day will be Snack Indulgence Day. We’ll skip lunch and just snack instead. How about it? I’ll eat with you, then work out with you afterward.”

“Go ahead. Pick whatever you like.”

Fu Siting remained silent, just standing there. Li Fei drew closer. For a moment, not even the faintest breath could be heard. In that instant, he truly feared Fu Xiaoting might break down and cry. Fortunately, he didn’t.

Fu Siting’s eyes were only slightly reddened. He took the plainest original yogurt. Sitting on the sofa, he silently pierced the lid and drank it earnestly, without much visible joy. His expression even made Li Fei doubt if he’d bought the wrong thing. But he’d tasted that brand of yogurt before, it was supposed to be pretty good. He didn’t know that Fu Siting was simply overwhelmed by too many conflicting emotions, unsure how to react.

Sprite and Coke? He’d actually tasted them for the first time that very day Li Fei took him to the movies. That day, Li Fei hadn’t just bought popcorn, he’d also grabbed matching Sprite and Coke. Later, when Li Fei hadn’t finished his Coke, Fu Siting, having polished off his Sprite, secretly took the remaining half and drank it down. Sprite, Coke, popcorn. Three of his “Top Ten Life-Changing Snack Wishes” fulfilled at once.

Today, he crossed off yogurt from the top of the list. So this was what yogurt tasted like… thick, tangy, and sweet. Delicious. Then he tasted crispy cookies. He’d already tried chocolate during the candy commercial shoot, but Li Fei told him that was milk chocolate, while today’s was hazelnut-filled liqueur chocolate, completely different.

Indeed, it was different. Both were delicious, but distinct. Cheese wiggled its chubby little legs and nudged him, whimpering.

“Sorry, you can’t have this.”

Fu Siting remembered the pet shop owner saying you had to teach puppies manners and not spoil them too much, so they’d grow into good big dogs. Also, puppies couldn’t eat chocolate, right?

Cheese was still very well-behaved. Though tempted, he stopped when told no. But seeing his pitiful look, Fu Siting peeled off a piece of sausage for him. The puppy wagged his tail happily and walked away. …

The afternoon sky had grown dim, threatening rain. Florida was hot, but storms came suddenly and violently. Li Fei got up to check if all the windows were shut. Turning back, he saw Fu Siting, freshly fed and watered, already leaning against the sofa, dozing off.

“Fu Siting, why are you so sleepy? If you’re napping, you should go to bed.”

He returned to Fu Siting’s side, trying to lift the heavy figure off the sofa. Just as he lifted him, his neck was suddenly wrapped in arms. Fu Siting buried his face into the crook of his shoulder, rubbing sleepily for a moment. A muffled clap of thunder echoed.

Fu Siting’s fingertips slowly traced the cold chain of his glasses.

“Li Fei.”

Li Fei’s eyelid twitched slightly. That sudden name sounded so much like the twenty-eight-year-old him. The expression was similar too, but precisely because it was so alike, Li Fei became acutely aware that something about Fu Siting felt off.

The thunder’s echoes lingered, each roll thudding against his heart.

Furrowing his brow, Li Fei touched Fu Siting’s cheek to gauge his temperature, slightly warm. A fever? But his forehead felt cool.

“… ”

Suddenly, Li Fei remembered the liqueur chocolates he’d eaten earlier, several of them! And the drink. He’d thought he’d bought juice. But now, examining the empty bottle closely, it seemed he’d accidentally picked up a sweet, low-alcohol cocktail. “You’re drunk.”

Fu Siting’s tolerance was practically nonexistent, one beer could knock him out. Drunkenness meant this flushed face and fixed stare. Li Fei finally understood why he was acting strange and was about to breathe a sigh of relief when suddenly, cool fingertips brushed his cheek, fingertips grazing his gold-rimmed glasses.

 “I’m not drunk,” Fu Siting declared. “Perfectly sober.” Some people always claimed sobriety when drunk. Li Fei sighed inwardly, preparing to lift him in a princess carry when suddenly his shirt was yanked. Caught off guard, he found himself pinned beneath Fu Siting on the sofa.

His dark pupils dilated slightly. Fu Siting swayed ever so slightly, yet stubbornly kept his back straight. His gaze was hazy, yet stubbornly lucid. He narrowed his eyes, the corners of his mouth lifting into a strained, imperfect smile. Almost with sober, logical coherence, he said sincerely, “Thank you for buying me snacks.”

“Chips, egg tarts, cookies, chocolate, I love them all.”

“I love the lego and the dog, everything, I love it all.”

“…”

“But.”

“But Fu Siting is Li Fei’s boyfriend. Not a pet. Not a little brother.”

“Sixteen… Does that seem young to you? But at sixteen, you can actually do anything.”

He reached out and gripped Li Fei’s wrist tightly. Lightning flashed, illuminating the room brightly. In that moment, his eyes were heavy, radiating the overwhelming presence of a grown man. For an instant, Li Fei even thought he was about to kiss him. He did lean down completely. But there was no kiss. Instead, he buried his face into the crook of Li Fei’s neck, as obedient as ever.

“You said you’d raise me again.”

“Then could you… take care of me as your boyfriend? I just want to be taken care of as your boyfriend.”

Li Fei fell silent. The chest pressed tightly against his own, their racing heartbeats were indistinguishable. He suddenly realized they were both a bit foolish. Why on earth had he thought sixteen-year-old Fu Siting didn’t want him? And Fu Xiaoting was even more…

Li Fei smiled bitterly. If he truly regarded him even a little as a younger brother, then what was the point of still wearing those damn gold-rimmed glasses all this time? Thunder roared outside the window, and the heavy rain finally fell.

***

Author’s Note: It’s now DAY 7. Fu Siting only tells the truth when drunk.

Li Fei: So Xiaoting likes me too.