16: The World in His Eyes

Breakfast was noodles—simple, with at most a spoonful of chili sauce. Qin Yan ate without lifting his head, his expression unchanged, unaware of the taste.

Zhou Shurong sat beside him, his hips not touching the chair—oh, he was floating.

“No vegetables, no egg, not even a handful of scallions. What happened to your usual rituals?”

Qin Yan didn’t respond, continuing to eat, spooning up noodles bite by bite. Once finished, he wiped his mouth, drank the soup, and carried the bowl toward the kitchen sink. As he turned on the water, he glanced at the pink Band-Aid on his thumb, hesitated, and then put on rubber gloves.

He washed the dishes very seriously, or rather, he washed them absentmindedly, spending several minutes on one bowl.

Zhou Shurong stayed by his side, observing every move.

Qin Yan had changed.

This change made Zhou Shurong feel sentimental and pained, but there was also a subtle, unnoticed joy—because this change had come from him.

Qin Yan had already left the kitchen and returned to the bedroom, gathering clothes from the wardrobe along with the suit jacket from the couch to prepare for washing in the bathroom.

He didn’t know how to wash expensive clothes, so he simply rubbed them by hand.

Zhou Shurong sighed. “I should be glad that the clothes left here all need hand washing. Otherwise, if you ruined them, you’d definitely cry.”

Of course, Qin Yan wasn’t that naive. When he soaked the clothes in the bucket, he had checked the labels to make sure they were safe to hand wash before proceeding.

There was a half-length mirror in the bathroom. Zhou Shurong, who was fond of his appearance, looked into it but saw no reflection of himself.

He lowered his eyes, took out his gold-framed glasses from his chest pocket, and put them on. The lenses reflected the white tiles behind him, but he still wasn’t visible. He silently put on the glasses.

“The TV says cameras can capture ghost images. When will you take a picture?”

He paused, looking at Qin Yan’s side profile. “Or maybe not. I wouldn’t want to scare you.”

Even though he knew Qin Yan couldn’t hear him, he still had to say it. “It’s strange. There really are ghosts in this world. I heard that a human soul weighs 21 grams—so curious, but unfortunately, my body passes through everything. I can’t use a scale.”

“Why haven’t I passed on? Is there something left behind? Some unfulfilled wish?”

Zhou Shurong watched Qin Yan in the mirror. Qin Yan was focused on rubbing his clothes. He reached out a hand and gently touched a strand of Qin Yan’s hair. The hair had no sensation, so Qin Yan wouldn’t have noticed, but Zhou Shurong’s simulated heart seemed to skip a beat.

Qin Yan shook the soap off his hands and hurried toward the living room.

It turned out, he hadn’t sensed Zhou Shurong touching his hair.

Zhou Shurong felt a little disappointed, floating behind Qin Yan.

He watched as Qin Yan grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. The sound of laughter filled the air—an outdoor variety show that was very popular online with frequent jokes.

Qin Yan said to the incense burner on the coffee table, “I thought you might get lonely, so I turned on the TV. Whatever I watch, you watch too. I don’t even know what kind of TV shows you like.”

After that, he went back to washing clothes.

He planned to finish the laundry before noon, then go out for lunch, visit the supermarket to buy groceries and light bulbs, replace the bulbs, and then prepare dinner. Everything was organized, with no spare time.

Zhou Shurong watched the TV for a while before turning his attention to the incense burner. It was delicate, expensive, and contained a layer of ash.

What was inside?

There seemed to be a faint smell.

It almost felt like grave soil, though it wasn’t ashes.

He smiled softly.

“You have the guts to dig up my grave dirt, but no guts to dig up my body? If you keep it in the fridge for preservation, I wouldn’t mind,” his voice was light, almost dissipating as soon as he finished speaking.

After drying the clothes, there were just five minutes left until noon. Qin Yan fixed his hair, changed his shoes, and noticed the sun shining brightly outside, so he put on a sun hat.

“I’m going out now. Wait for me here!”

Zhou Shurong didn’t listen. He didn’t obediently stay home, instead, he continued following Qin Yan.

It was Saturday, and there weren’t many people in the elevator. Most were looking down at their phones.

When Qin Yan entered, the delivery guy near the elevator door felt a slight chill and looked up, only seeing Qin Yan’s neutral side profile.

Zhou Shurong apologized with a smile. “Sorry, I bumped into you.”

He moved aside, carefully avoiding the body of the living person.

Suddenly, something caught his eye. He looked at a woman beside him holding a child. She looked gaunt, with dark circles under her eyes, and appeared to be very weary. Upon closer inspection, the child wasn’t being held; it was clearly hanging from her arm.

The woman was unaware, only feeling a soreness in her arm, repeatedly rubbing her muscles. The ghostly baby seemed to think she was stroking it, laughing up at her with a gaze full of attachment.

This baby ghost had some cultivation—it could cling to the woman and directly influence her physical body.

Zhou Shurong observed for a while.

The elevator doors opened, and everyone filed out. The emaciated woman passed by him, holding an umbrella and carrying the ghostly baby as she left.

Qin Yan stood in front of the building’s glass door, looking up at the sun. It was so bright and dazzling that it was almost blinding, threatening to bring tears to his eyes.

He hesitated at the door.

Why hesitate?

It was a strange feeling—suddenly, he regretted not bringing a pitch-black, light-blocking umbrella instead of just a sun hat.

The thought passed quickly. He tugged at the brim of his hat, lowered his head, and stepped out into the sunlight.

Beside him, Zhou Shurong, who longed to be close to him, stepped out as well.

He harbored a faint hope.

However, in an instant, the scorching sunlight felt like boiling water poured over his head.

A scream almost escaped him.

He retreated hastily, shrinking back into the shadowy, mysterious place.

He felt powerless, his gaze fixed on Qin Yan walking in the sunlight. His whole body was glowing. The light filled Zhou Shurong with both longing and fear.

Qin Yan left the neighborhood and received a phone call—it was from Zhou Langxing.

“Ah Yan!” he called him “Ah Yan” in an affectionate tone, but his voice suddenly dropped, sounding somewhat dejected, reminding Qin Yan of a drooping-eared dog. “Ah Yan, I can’t leave. My old man insists on keeping me here until the cast comes off.”

“Isn’t that good?” Qin Yan didn’t even realize it, but hearing Zhou Langxing’s voice, the loneliness and numbness he had felt vanished in an instant.

He laughed and said, “It’s better to lock you up. How can someone who’s injured their leg still be hopping around everywhere?”

“Huh? Your description sounds like you’re talking about a dog.” Zhou Langxing seemed pleased, as Qin Yan’s voice was lively, and he seemed to have recovered from his illness.

“Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make you imagine such things.”

Qin Yan had felt a bit uneasy before answering the phone, as he recalled how awkward it had been last night. Fortunately, Zhou Langxing didn’t bring it up.

“By the way, are you off work? I waited until it was almost midnight before calling you.”

Qin Yan chuckled, “Wow, so I’m not the only one who forgot today is Saturday.”

“Today’s Saturday?” Zhou Langxing muttered on the phone, clearly confused. It was all because Qin Yan had been worried about being late for work last night, which had made him anxious.

“So, what are you up to today and tomorrow? If you need me to climb a mountain of knives or go through fire, I’ll do it without hesitation!”

“You’ve been locked up, and you’re still talking big.”

“I can climb over the wall, you know.”

“No! I’m not worth you risking your leg for. Just focus on resting and taking care of yourself, and when your leg heals…”

“Then what?”

“I can take you to pet cats again.”

“Ah, pet cats? It’s clearly me accompanying you.”

Qin Yan laughed as he walked into a fast food restaurant. He ordered a ten-yuan set meal from the owner, then found a seat and told Zhou Langxing:

“Alright, I’m going to eat now. Don’t worry about me. I’m feeling great, and I can finish a big bowl of rice. I’ve got lots to do today and tomorrow—my schedule’s packed, so you don’t have to worry. Take care of yourself, okay? I’m hanging up now.”

Zhou Langxing said goodbye, and Qin Yan hung up the phone. After finishing his meal, he glanced at the leftover food in his bowl and blinked sheepishly.

“I can’t eat anymore, really can’t.”

Afterward, Qin Yan spent an hour wandering the supermarket. He felt his desires had dulled a lot. He didn’t even have the urge to buy the snacks he usually liked. He’d pick something up, think about it, then put it back on the shelf.

Maybe… it was because he had just eaten.

In the end, he only bought some meat, vegetables, and two small light bulbs.

Zhou Shurong had been waiting for a long time and was finally going to meet the person he had been thinking about. But when Qin Yan walked in, he didn’t look up, his gaze not acknowledging Zhou Shurong.

It was to be expected—how could someone walking in the sunlight notice a lonely soul in a shadowy hole?

Yet… his own sinking emotions were hard to control.

Zhou Shurong dragged his weak body and followed Qin Yan into the elevator.

He stood in front of Qin Yan, staring at those beautiful amber-colored eyes.

Those eyes, slightly melancholic, could contain all the colorful hues of the world, yet couldn’t hold a Zhou Shurong.

Zhou Shurong tiredly stared at a point in the empty space. The noise in his body was so loud that even he couldn’t tell what he really wanted.

Was it to willingly, quietly stay by Qin Yan’s side?

Was it the growing greed, desiring those eyes to reflect his own image?

Or was it the resignation of stepping back, realizing that the more he loved him, the more he should let go?

Zhou Shurong harbored a hidden concern in his heart—would staying by Qin Yan’s side affect his health?