PO 54

“Woojeong. You need to eat something. I’ll go inside right away, so please open the door. Okay?”

Woojeong lay on the bed. Madam Kwak’s worried voice came from outside the door, but he didn’t respond.

At first the voice calling while knocking on the door was hard to endure, but now it felt like the sound that came from a TV or radio, and he felt nothing.

“You’ll be in serious trouble like this. Woojeong, even the executive director is worried about you. …… What should I do? Should I open the door and drag you out by force?”

“I’ll stay here, so go get some rest.”

“This has already been several days. Both of you are starving, so how can I rest easy? Your body is already weak, and if you stay on an empty stomach it’ll be harder for you, so what should I do, really. Woojeong. Don’t be like that, and just show your face for a moment.”

The room darkened with curtains drawn over the windows. On the first day he had felt his stomach overturn and had vomited several times, but now, whether because his strength had drained or because there was nothing left in his stomach, he didn’t even feel nausea.

Woojeong touched the bed sheet weakly and closed his eyes. Even though he had slept all day, he felt drained again. Woojeong didn’t try to stay awake. While he slept he had no worries, and his body didn’t suffer.

“Uhm…….”

While he turned in his sleep, Woojeong curled his body small. He opened his eyes with a shiver and held his stomach with both hands.

His stomach kept hurting. Each time pain woke him from sleep, his anxiety grew bigger.

Would the baby be okay…?

“……Lee Woojeong.”

In the pitch-darkness he heard a familiar voice calling his name. The clear voice whispered close by, and Woojeong flinched and looked back.

But inside the dark room there was no one. The low voice was coming from outside the door.

“……How long are you going to stay like that?”

It was Han Jaegang. Just as he said he would wait until Woojeong came out, he had kept his post in front of the door. Late at night, after spending several days sleeping on the bare floor, his voice was hoarse.

“I’ll go into my room, so you stay outside. Why should someone who did nothing wrong suffer?”

Woojeong pulled off the blanket and tried to raise his body, but he embraced his stomach again because of the dull pain. He looked desperately toward the direction of Han Jaegang’s voice, then he quietly got off the bed. Woojeong hushed his footsteps and slowly went toward the door.

Woojeong crouched next to the door and his breath escaped between his dry lips. His lips only quivered dryly as he raised his hand to the door.

From beyond the door Han Jaegang’s strong pheromone scent was flowing in. As the distance grew closer, the scent became clearer, and the pain in his stomach seemed to ease a little.

Woojeong sat close to the door to feel it more clearly, and Han Jaegang spoke again.

“……Do you know that? You always slipped past my expectations.”

Woojeong was startled and pulled his hand back from the door. He feared he might open the door, but there was no other movement, he only leaned his body against the door.

“That day, how did you manage to come into my room? It was too strange to think it was a simple coincidence. Until then no one had ever come in like that. You…… You still don’t remember what you did to me that day, right?”

Was he saying it knowing that Woojeong was listening from beyond the door, or did he keep talking like this even while Woojeong slept? Woojeong listened to his voice and took a deep breath.

“When I approached to wake you, who had collapsed in the bathroom, you suddenly embraced me tightly. Then you kissed me right away.”

Woojeong lifted his head in shock. Han Jaegang sighed and continued indifferently.

“I thought maybe you might remember that time, but from the start you must not have had that memory.”

Woojeong unconsciously shook his head. His memory was still incomplete, but sometimes he had felt it strange because the image of an unfamiliar man kept surfacing.

……Was that Han Jaegang?

“Later when I went to a blind date, I found the person who had the same scent from that day.”

Han Jaegang exhaled a long sigh.

“Lee Doyoung, that bastard, pretended your scent was his. Lee Doyoung, who forced you to hide it saying it was a disgusting scent that made people uncomfortable, actually coveted your scent.”

Woojeong had not known that story. So that was why he put his clothes in his room and told him to wear them……. Woojeong smiled bitterly.

“……At first it was because of the pheromone. I won’t deny that. I deceived you to bring you here, and after finding you I kept trying to learn about you, that’s true.”

Han Jaegang confessed the past calmly as if he was doing penance. But at some point Woojeong could not hear his words properly anymore.

Woojeong touched his cracked lips with his fingertips. For nearly three days he had not even drunk a sip of water, and his mouth was completely dry.

If only he could have just one piece of ice…….

Woojeong leaned his head against the wall while imagining rolling a cool piece of ice in his mouth.

The crouching posture in the narrow space was uncomfortable, but the stomach pain had subsided enough to endure.

“……Lee Woojeong. Are you listening?”

Han Jaegang called his name to check he was safe and listening. Woojeong looked weakly at the door.

He was continuing to release thick pheromones from outside the door. Of course he couldn’t know Woojeong was pregnant.

Maybe his instinct felt that his pheromone was needed and unconsciously acted that way. For Woojeong it was very fortunate.

“I’m thirsty…….”

Woojeong whispered softly and placed his hand on his stomach, stroking it carefully. He felt relieved because the stomach that had often hurt felt a little more comfortable.

The faint sounds outside stopped for a moment, and then he heard something being set down on the floor with a tap.

“Drink some water. I’ll come back later.”

As if he had heard Woojeong whispering he was thirsty, he set water down in front of the door and stepped away. Woojeong wanted to drink it right away, but instead of opening the door he curled up on the bare floor.

He could not keep living like this. More than anything, he was worried it would not be good for the baby. But he also could not live as if nothing had happened, like before.

“What should we do…….?”

With his hand on his stomach, Woojeong asked a question that could never receive an answer and closed his eyes. Lying on the hard floor, he missed too much the embrace that had held him warmly.

Early dawn. Woojeong opened his eyes and sat up. Because he had slept on the bare floor his body was stiff, but his condition was not too bad.

Outside the door it was quiet, no one was there. Woojeong, who sat quietly with his hand on his stomach, suddenly stood up and went to the bathroom. Without thinking he washed himself and dried his hair, and then he suddenly felt hungry.

As he hesitated, Woojeong turned his head toward the door. Maybe because his body was strange, as soon as he thought he was hungry he felt like he couldn’t endure unless he ate right away. Without more hesitation Woojeong opened the door and stepped out.

“…….”

Han Jaegang, who had been sitting with his back against the wall and his face buried in his arm, lifted his head quickly when he sensed movement. Woojeong passed him and headed straight to the kitchen, as Jaegang stared in surprise that he suddenly came out.

It was not yet the time Madam Kwak would be in the kitchen. Woojeong opened the refrigerator and pulled out whatever side dish containers he could grab and put them on the island counter.

Luckily there was rice left in the rice cooker. The sweet smell of the rice almost made him faint. Woojeong scooped a full bowl of rice and picked up chopsticks, standing in front of the island counter.

“Lee Woojeong.”

Woojeong stuffed rice into his mouth without even sparing a glance at Han Jaegang, who followed him inside. He did not know what he was eating or what it tasted like, and he only focused on filling his hunger.

“Why are you acting like this all of a sudden?”

“Because I’m hungry.”

Woojeong, who crammed a mouthful of rice, thumped his chest, and Han Jaegang, who was watching beside him, hurriedly handed him water. He could not hide his bewilderment at the sight of Woojeong acting this way for the first time.

“Sit down and eat.”

Woojeong gave no reply and only scooped rice into his mouth with a spoon.

Han Jaegang sighed and wrapped his arm around Woojeong’s shoulder, and he urged him again to move to the table. Then Woojeong slammed the spoon down with a clatter.

“Why won’t you even let me eat?!”

Silence hung between them because of Woojeong’s irritable reaction. Han Jaegang seemed taken aback for a moment, but soon he calmed himself and soothed Woojeong.

“……Fine. I won’t bother you, so eat more.”

“I don’t want to.”

The hunger that made him feel like something terrible would happen if he didn’t eat right away vanished, and he felt nauseated. Woojeong walked past Han Jaegang in silence and went back to his room.

After vomiting all the food he had eaten, Woojeong went straight into the dressing room. He pulled out a large backpack and looked at the closet where clothes hung.

He pushed aside the expensive clothes and stuffed into the backpack only the comfortable ones he could wear, and then he looked around. At that moment, a light gray cardigan caught his eye. It was the cardigan Han Jaegang had once put on him.

Woojeong hesitated for a moment, then stuffed the cardigan into the bag and closed the zipper. He slung the bag over his shoulder and walked out of the room.

Han Jaegang stood at the door with a rigid face. Woojeong paused for a moment, then tried to walk past, but Han Jaegang hurriedly grabbed his arm.

He gripped Woojeong’s arm so hard that he could not resist, and with a flustered look he asked Woojeong.

“Where are you trying to go in that condition?”

“……Anywhere, just…….”

Han Jaegang turned his head to the window. He stood in silence for a while as if he was suppressing something, and then he slowly turned his head and looked at Woojeong.

“I’ll go out. So you stay here.”

“I don’t want to…….”

Woojeong struggled to pull his arm free from his grasp. He had no strength, so even that was not easy.

“This isn’t even my house, so why should I?”

Even the Snow Reflection Residence, which he had once loved so much, only felt uncomfortable now. He had no proper place to go, but he desperately wanted to escape this place.

Woojeong felt like his strength would give out and he would just collapse. He only felt resentful toward Han Jaegang, who blocked him desperately from leaving.

“Then I’ll take you.”

Woojeong finally pried off his arm and stepped back.

“How do you know where I’ll go?”

“Lee Woojeong.”

“You’ll just do everything your way……. Anyway, no matter where I go, the executive director can find me right away. Then isn’t it pointless to block me like this?”

At that moment, Han Jaegang’s face turned cold. Woojeong bit his lip. He knew that his words hurt him, but right now he had no energy to care for him.

“This won’t do. We need to talk first.”

Woojeong let out a hollow breath and smiled faintly.

“You won’t die, so don’t worry. I’ll repay the help you gave me.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

Woojeong rummaged in his pocket and held something out to him. There was a credit card and a phone in his hand.

“If I need money I’ll use the card. I’ll take the phone too. Then you can know where I am and what I do. That’s enough, right?”

“……Woojeong-ah.”

“If you get sick like that time, call me. I’ll come. And…….”

Woojeong slowly moved to put distance between them. After glancing at the entrance to check the way out, he looked straight at Han Jaegang. His eyes burned hot as tears welled up.

“……Don’t call my name so kindly anymore. Not once have you ever called me ‘Woojeong-ah.’”

Thick drops of tears fell from Woojeong’s eyes. He turned away without hesitation and left the Snow Reflection Residence, but Han Jaegang could not bring himself to chase after him or hold him back.

His eyes trembled as he watched Woojeong’s back growing distant.