PHUW 44

***

Compared to when he suffered a panic attack, Ahn Haeri woke up feeling very good. And as soon as he reached out and confirmed that the spot beside him was empty, he kicked both feet alternately into the air.

“Ah, shit!”

He rolled left and right, almost falling off the bed again. He crawled back to the center of the bed, buried his face in the pillow and pounded it with his fists.

‘Are you insane, Ahn Haeri! Are you insane! Of all the dreams, why that! You should’ve just been caught by the monster bear instead!’

It was such a crazy dream that even a hundred kinds of absurdity could not compare.

At first it had been an ordinary nightmare, being chased by a monster bear, so ordinary it was boring by now. But somehow midway it had turned into a ridiculous dream with a dog. A dog dream starring the hamburger thief. The moment he thought he would be crushed to death under the massive body of that damned bear cub, the bear had turned into a man. The low voice and the familiar scent were so vivid even in the dream that he knew who it was without needing to see his face.

And it did not end there. The man in the dream touched Haeri’s thigh with his large hand. That was when Haeri realized he was naked. He was not embarrassed. Rather, he spread his legs so the other would touch him more. The hand trailed up the flesh of his thigh, the thick, firm waist pressed down, and… they did it.

Intense and obscene. Until he was out of breath. Even though it had been a dream, it left Ahn Haeri lingering impression.

‘How am I supposed to face him, fuck.’

He flailed his limbs and beat the bed. He felt like dying of embarrassment.

Knock knock.

“Are you awake?”

Jeong Mok asked from outside the door.

He jumped in place like a startled cat. He managed not to fall out of bed, but his head spun from the shock.

“Why aren’t you ans… Ahn Haeri!”

Jeong Mok, who opened the door, saw Haeri clutching his head in pain and immediately lifted him up in his arms.

“Uh?”

Where on earth did that monstrous strength, that kept lifting him so easily, come from?

“This won’t do. We’re going to the hospital right now.”

Haeri insisted there was no need, that it was nothing. But this time there was no stopping him.

“You were sick last night too. You neglect what seems minor, and in a single moment it can kill you.”

“……”

The muttering “what do you mean kill me in a single moment” stayed only inside Haeri’s mouth. The face looking down at him from so close, holding him up like a princess, was far too grave.

Cold eyes blazing between his brows. A jutting chin pressed out from grim determination. Twisted lips. Like an angry beast.

‘It’s scary.’

Haeri quietly lowered his eyes, he let himself be carried, docile, to the car parked on the first floor. Without even shoes, he was set into the passenger seat and strapped tightly into the seat belt. Behind Jeong Mok’s back, a black-haired lump loomed into view. The dog.

“You get in too.”

He thought Jeong Mok would leave it inside the house. But unexpectedly, Jeong Mok put the dog in the back seat. It was so massive the large sedan was filled.

On the way, they stopped by the animal hospital. It was the kind of plain, characterless two-story building common in the semi-developed outskirts. In the wide gravel yard, big enough for three tour buses, a vet came out as soon as they parked. It was the one they had seen yesterday.

“I was just about to contact you, and here you are.”

The vet said they had found the owner, but his expression was not good. He clearly had more to say. But Jeong Mok had no time to hear about that now. If there was no Jeong Mok, there was no Haeri either.

Since it was difficult to bring the fierce giant dog inside, they tied it up for the moment in the back yard. The creature barked wildly whenever the vet approached. Haeri soothed it and calmed it and then brought a bowl of water.

They arrived at the hospital and registered at the emergency desk first. Considering the previous surgical site, and because Jeong Mok wielded strong influence at the hospital, the attending professor appeared quickly. Without any waiting, Haeri was taken for detailed examinations.

The professor said there was nothing wrong. To be honest, Haeri himself thought so too. But Jeong Mok would not accept it.

“He was attacked by a dog and fell, and you say there’s nothing wrong? Then why is he still in pain? Could it be a CT error?”

“Our CT machine was installed less than two years ago.”

“If it’s not the equipment, is it a difference in data analysis?”

Over-immersed in his role as guardian, he blamed the professor’s incompetence. Though his words were extremely rude, the professor did not get angry. Instead, he looked nervous and gave a forced laugh.

“If you really wish, we can transfer him to the main hospital in Seoul. But first, shouldn’t we at least hear what the patient himself has to say?”

The professor glanced at Haeri. His eyes behind the tacky metal-framed glasses said a lot. You’re hiding something. Which of the things you were told not to do did you do? Confess.

Haeri did have something to say. Although the sudden movements played a part, the real cause of his headache seemed to be ‘arousal.’ But could he possibly say that to Jeong Mok?

Conscious of Jeong Mok, who was over-immersed in acting as his guardian, Haeri’s lips twitched. The perceptive professor asked, “Do you have something to tell only me?”

“Yes.”

“What is it?”

Jeong Mok looked at him and asked.

“I mean only to the professor.”

Haeri pointed at himself and at the professor in turn.

Jeong Mok’s expression froze. Like someone betrayed. The nurse assisting at the side rolled her eyes and quietly opened the consultation room door. Jeong Mok rose silently and walked out. Only after the door closed did Haeri finally let out the breath he had been holding.

He told the professor everything without hiding it. Of course, he changed a few details. He said the person was not the large man who had just stepped out, but a woman.

“Sexual arousal isn’t exactly ideal after brain surgery. But you’re healthy. You even can get it up in the shower. I’ll prescribe your usual medication. Don’t overdo it, and especially avoid erotic fantasies as much as you can. High intracranial pressure isn’t good. You never know which tiny vessel might rupture.”

The professor laughed as he typed on the keyboard. Haeri was embarrassed and felt that it was unfair.

“How do you even stop thinking sexual thoughts? Honestly, I don’t want to. But he keeps touching me and hugging me…”

“Touching you? Are you actually involved with someone?”

“Ah.”

“Didn’t you say it was a dream? Did I misunderstand? I haven’t heard you’ve found family or a lover.”

The professor flipped through the notes on his amnesia and glanced at the nurse. The nurse shook her head.

“Ah… no. It happened in a dream. In a dream.”

“Don’t look at dirty things, watch something wholesome.”

The professor clicked his tongue. Haeri ears burned red.

No, this was unfair. He had never watched anything erotic. At least not that he remembered. Even in his hazy and fragmented memories, there were hardly any signs of that. If there was anything, it was vague memories of people trying to do filthy things to him rather than anything erotic. Besides that bastard Kim Jeongwook who deserved to be fried alive, there had been three or four other incidents he faintly recalled. But Haeri himself had never once wanted such things. He had never even held anyone’s wrist, man or woman. Which meant… huh? Had he never been in a relationship?

“Then am I ga….mmph!”

Before his cursed mouth could attach the “-y,” a quick hand clamped over it. The professor gave him a questioning look.

“What did you say?”

The professor asked.

It wasn’t that he wasn’t gay, but mentioning the word “gay” in front of the professor was impossible. Especially since the professor knew he was living with Jeong Mok. If he said anything about being gay, the professor would immediately connect it to Jeong Mok.

“It’s I just suddenly thought of something.”

He mumbled an excuse and hurried out of the consultation room. He received the same prescription as usual, but was firmly instructed to return immediately if anything at all felt wrong. That instruction was surely given to Jeong Mok as well.

And sure enough, Jeong Mok’s eyes, when he spotted Haeri while speaking with the nurse, were not ordinary. Even a grandma hearing that her precious only grandson hadn’t eaten for three days wouldn’t show such an intense urge to protect. He was already treated like a three-year-old child set loose by the riverside, and now it seemed going out at all was finished.

Even though they had seen the doctor without waiting, by the time they were finished, much time had passed. Haeri had skipped breakfast, he was very hungry.

“Let’s go eat.”

When Haeri said he wanted hot soup, Jeong Mok took him to the most famous ox bone soup restaurant in the area. Even though it was early lunch, the place was bustling. Haeri ate a bowl of ox bone soup filled with palm-sized abalone, while Jeong Mok hardly touched his own, instead pressing Haeri with his eyes to even drink down the radish kimchi broth. He was hungry and the food was delicious, so Haeri cleared his bowl.

They even bought some to-go for later and then headed to the animal hospital. After a short wait, the vet came out. His expression was much worse than before.

“We found the owner. They live in northern Seoul.”

“Northern Seoul?”

Jeong Mok and Haeri frowned at the same time.

“That’s far from here. How did it get all the way here?”

“Well, um… Ha.”

The vet scratched his scalp with his index finger, looking troubled.

“The registered owner really does live in northern Seoul. But the owner’s parents live nearby.”

“So they brought it along while visiting their parents and lost it?”

Haeri asked.

“They did lose it, but… it’s not easy to explain.”

“You mean they lost it but don’t really intend to look for it.”

At Jeong Mok’s words, Haeri frowned.

“They lost it, so why aren’t they searching?”

“They say they lost it, but in truth it’s abandonment. Maybe they even drove it away on purpose.”

His low voice was heavy with cynicism. The vet glanced at Haeri and smiled awkwardly.

“We asked the owner for their parents’ number so we could contact them directly. The owner said they would call their parents themselves, but then we heard nothing. When we called back, they didn’t answer. When we called from another number, they just repeated the same thing. We’ll have to report it to the local authorities, but either way, until the owner comes to claim it, the dog will end up in a shelter.”

According to Janggun’s owner yesterday, a giant guard dog ending up in a shelter usually meant euthanasia.