PHUW 89

‘But this also counts as sleeping together? It’s not only penetration that makes it so, right?’

Jeong Mok had said that sleeping together did not necessarily mean penetration. But it was hard to take that at face value.

Right now he was both the one Haeri and Gom-i trusted most and, at the same time, the most untrustworthy liar and conman. He lied so naturally that even the most obvious things made one suspicious. Gom-i seemed to feel the same, usually obedient but when it came to such matters glaring at Jeong Mok with nothing but distrust.

‘I need to check.’

The best place to ask was, of course, the internet. But there was no phone nearby. He remembered leaving it on the living room sofa. His legs were still not in good condition and he was too lethargic to go fetch it. And what if he ran into Jeong Mok out there?

His face still burned.

As far as Haeri knew, Jeong Mok was kinder and more patient than anyone. But once his clothes came off, he had been so lewd and bold it had been shocking. There had been a reason he had kept warning that crossing the line was dangerous and pushing him away.

The moment Jeong Mok decided to go through with it, Haeri had lost the lead instantly. In a blink, he had climaxed three times.

The first had been so ecstatic he could barely breathe, the second had left his whole body tingling, and the last one had not been only pleasure. When Jeong Mok stimulated his cock and balls directly, in a way so obscene that just watching would have made his lower belly twist, he had almost pissed himself. His vision had gone hazy. Fortunately what little was left had been wrung out, or else, if he had really wet himself, the humiliation would have driven him to leap straight into the Han River.

But even during it, Jeong Mok must have been holding back a great deal. He had only touched him with his hand. He had not used his mouth. He had not made him take strange positions. He had asked if Haeri wanted to touch his cock, but had not demanded he jerk him off. And the hole Haeri had steeled himself for, Jeong Mok had not so much as glanced at.

He was still being treated like a kid. To be honest, even Haeri himself thought he was one.

Just a few kisses and some touching, and he had come three times. He could insist it was proof of youth and vigor, but compared to his partner, who had only come once like an adult, he felt like he had been the only one to lose control. It was embarrassing.

‘It feels like I was the only one who enjoyed it too much.’

He had started it, but once swept up by Jeong Mok he had been helpless. He should have taken the lead himself. He had wanted to make him regret treating him like a kid, but in the end it had only proved that he was one.

‘Normally, if you thrust, you feel it more. That’s why at the end he pressed between my thighs.’

Usually another person’s touch was far more stimulating than one’s own. Jeong Mok was a man too, so if someone touched or sucked him directly, he would feel it intensely.

‘Sucking might be hard, but touching I think I could do right now.’

Haeri curled his hand lightly in the air, imagining it. With one hand it might not be enough, but with both hands, like this, up and down, it would work. But even that seemed lacking. He needed one sure move that would shatter Jeong Mok’s composure.

‘In the end, penetration is the best, isn’t it?’

Jeong Mok had denied flatly that he intended to do that, but it had to feel better than just touching. The one being penetrated would suffer for it, though.

Fully erect, Jeong Mok’s cock was bigger than he had imagined. Haeri doubted it could even fit inside his delicate hole. If something went wrong, he could end up humiliated, carted to the emergency room. That he would never accept.

Not doing it was not an option. Now that he had seen Jeong Mok flustered and scolding him for being reckless, Haeri was determined to go through with it no matter what. Otherwise Jeong Mok might change his mind again, claim it was just a bluff, and pull out. To prevent that, he had to push it all the way.

‘Because he’s a coward.’

Yes. When it came to these things, Jeong Mok was a pure coward. So much so that he got angry, drove him out, and chased him down just at the thought of a kiss. Back then in the garden, if he had just closed his eyes and leaned in for a kiss, they wouldn’t have gone through all this roundabout trouble.

Then he would never have left home, and he would never have broken his foot working at the convenience store when he ran into that crazy bastard. It was all Jeong Mok’s fault for being scared of a kiss and running away.

‘What’s the big deal about a kiss. Once I tried it, it was nothing but good.’

Maybe there was some reason for him. Haeri did not yet know every corner of Jeong Mok’s insides.

Or maybe he was a coward because he was an adult. Even if he said otherwise, he was the nephew of Hyeonsan’s chairwoman and the current vice chairman of Hyeonsan, so of course he had to worry about outward reputation and appearances. Even Haeri, a mere part-timer at a convenience store, would panic and move if rumors spread around the neighborhood that he was messing around with another guy. In fact, he had already quit his job and left that area.

But to say nothing could ever happen just because of people’s eyes was too much. They could at least try. It was not as if they had to brag all over town that they were messing around. People who scare themselves before even starting, that was what cowards were. And Jeong Mok was a coward.

‘He looks like even a grim reaper couldn’t carry him off, and he’s only thirty.’

These days, at thirty, you could still get government youth support for nearly ten years. It was not too late to be starting a career, nor too late to begin a long-term relationship.

It was not Joseon times where one hand grab meant a lifetime of chastity to each other. It was not his parents’ generation, where bachelors desperately clung to blind dates with a grim resolve to marry somehow. Everything was out in the open now, so what was there to be so uncomfortable about.

And with the fading idea that sons had to carry on the family line, what did it matter if he was gay. It was not as if either of them had parents or siblings to support. If the two of them were happy, living together as just the two of them was natural enough.

Anyway, if Jeong Mok had not panicked and run so noisily back then, if Haeri had not been left alone, sulking in loneliness and thinking of him, then he would never have gone so far as to seduce him openly. Instead, when a frightened Jeong Mok tried to cross the line, he probably would have said not to. So it was Jeong Mok’s fault that they had crossed it.

“Right. None of this is my fault. It’s all yours, hyung. Isn’t that right, Gom-i?”

He asked the furry bundle lying beside him. The drowsy giant dog did not open his eyes, only flicked one ear. That was his agreement.

Today he had taken his first step.

Like a novice driver, he had only meant to cross one leg of the road. But the car he had boarded turned out to be a runaway truck with broken brakes, and it carried him far beyond his original plan, leaving him in the middle of a highway. He had no intention of getting off. He did not even know how he could. He would ride until the road ended, ‘no matter what.’

‘I’ll have to study the way with the hole. I can’t be the only one losing my mind with pleasure.’

If others heard, they would say what kind of idiot lunatic comes up with a plan like that.

But whatever others thought, Haeri had made up his mind.

***

Even a large sofa was far too small and narrow for Jeong Mok. There were beds in the second or third floor guest rooms that fit his build, so he could sleep there. But he wanted to stay as close as possible to the main bedroom.

He never knew when Haeri’s seizures might start. Even at the hospital they had been startling. Today had been a big day in its own way, but a seizure could still come.

‘When he lived alone, did he not have seizures?’

The question came to him. Had he not shaken alone? Or was it because Gom-i had been there?

In countries where pet culture was advanced, large dogs were even trained as service dogs for emotional stability. Even if Gom-i was monstrously large for a Bernese Mountain Dog, he was smart and followed his master well, so he gave enough comfort to put someone at ease. In some ways, he was even more of a bodyguard than a professional one.

‘I might end up pushed out by Gom-i.’

The thought made Jeong Mok smile faintly to himself. Just falling into such childish thoughts was happiness itself. His body felt as if it were floating, as if he were in free fall.

Of course there was no parachute. No wings. Nothing could stop him now. Did the person sleeping in that bedroom know this? Haeri, so innocent and so sweet, who had been given the chance to run but had walked straight into Jeong Mok’s trap on his own two feet, surely had no idea.

Jeong Mok raised the corner of his mouth as he looked at the slightly open bedroom door.

For the first time in almost two months, he slept soundly.

He woke before his alarm rang, took a leisurely shower, finished getting ready for work, then put chicken breast and sweet potatoes in the microwave while he set butter on a frying pan and cooked eggs and bread. A savory smell filled the kitchen.

After preparing a simple vegetable salad, milk, water, and barley tea to go with it, he carefully went to the main bedroom and knocked.

“Haeri-ya, are you up? Breakfast is ready.”

Heavy footsteps sounded inside. At the scratch of claws on the door, he opened it slightly. As expected, it was Gom-i’s muzzle poking through.

“Is your hyung awake?”

Woof.

The giant dog barked softly, as if he had forgotten all about scolding Jeong Mok yesterday, and trotted off wagging his tail toward the kitchen. In his own way, he had no grudges at all, to the point Jeong Mok wondered if Gom was broken in temperament or some kind of sociopath. But with that unmanageable bulk, it was better this way than if he had been petty.

On the wide main bed, Ahn Haeri lay turned on his side. His T-shirt had ridden up, baring his waist. His short shorts clung tight to his hips, showing their curve. In the past, Jeong Mok would have looked without thought, worrying only if he was cold. But this morning, his feelings were different.

It was erotic. And it looked delicious. Especially the pale flesh under his round buttocks and his inner thighs that still held a flush of red. Saliva pooled in Jeong Mok’s mouth, and his hunger grew. If not for work, he felt as if he might devour him on the spot.

Instead, Jeong Mok carefully approached the bed and reached out. He patted the arms stretched neatly in front of him, and with his other hand smoothed his messy hair. Like a parent cradling a beloved child, he brushed along the line of his forehead, stroking the fine hairs until Haeri’s drowsy eyelids moved lazily.

“It’s morning.”

“Hhh… mmm.”

Haeri opened his eyes after closing them, gazed quietly at Jeong Mok, then turned his body. He stretched both arms out, pulled down Jeong Mok’s arm, and drew him closer. His waist bent naturally.

“Get up. Wash and eat breakfast.”

“……”

Haeri showed no sign of getting up. He clung to Jeong Mok, who instead of being annoyed found himself smiling. He pulled the warm body of the grown man into his arms.

“Can’t I just sleep a little more?”

“Eat first, then sleep.”

“I’ll eat later.”

“I won’t feel at ease unless you eat before I leave for work.”

“Mm.”

Drowsy, Haeri let himself go limp, and Jeong Mok lifted him up like a teddy bear. His unsteady head leaned against Jeong Mok’s shoulder and rolled there.

“You said you were an adult. But now I see you’re just a baby.”

“……Today I want to be a baby.”

At the playful plea full of cuteness, Jeong Mok shook with laughter.