RB 83

He felt a slight recoil. His body swayed lightly with every step.

Eunho couldn’t open his eyes, but he knew he was being carried. It was probably from the mansion to the annex.

He felt the stiff fabric of a shirt and the warmth of skin under his cheek. It might be Secretary Hong, or maybe Seo Taehwa. He was sure it wasn’t Choi Yeorok. That man wasn’t the type to do such chores.

Eunho was sick for another full day. He must have talked nonsense while burning with fever.

He even saw an image of Choi Yeorok. The man who said he didn’t even want to step into his nephew’s room was standing right in front of him. He touched Eunho’s forehead and wiped his sweat-soaked face with a cold wet towel.

‘Let’s just change your shirt before you sleep.’

Choi Yeorok’s illusion tended to him with care that didn’t suit him. He forced Eunho to sit, made him lean against his own body, and changed the damp shirt for a clean one. It made no sense, which was why it felt even more like a dream.

But the kind Choi Yeorok was so dear to him that it brought tears to his eyes. Eunho lifted his heavy arms and hugged the figure in front of him.

‘Chairman, I like you.… I really like you so much.’

His feverish voice made him sound like he was crying, but Yeorok still felt the emotion he wanted to convey.

‘You’re out of your mind.’

He scoffed as a reply. Even as an illusion, he was cold as usual. It was a dream anyway, just imagination, so why not say something kind? Eunho sniffled, hurt.

‘Can’t I like you?’

‘Would you stop if I told you not to?’

‘I can’t… I’m sorry… I tried, but… I couldn’t.’

He had known from the start that his feelings could never be returned, even in death. That was why he had tried to hide it to the end. He had pressed it down, crushed it, swallowed it, just to keep it from growing beyond simple fondness.

But the more time he spent with Choi Yeorok, the more he shared space and touch with him, the larger his feelings grew. They overflowed now, no longer able to fit inside his chest. He wanted to tell him, even if he had to hold onto a vision to do it.

A large hand gently stroked the back of his head.

‘Then you’ll just have to keep liking me.’

‘…I’m sorry.’

‘It’s fine, just get better.’

The illusion’s hand stroked his neck softly, soothing and comforting him. Eunho hung on his shoulder, his body slumped.

Every part of it was the Choi Yeorok he loved. The gentle actions that didn’t match his harsh words, the cool fingertips, the pleasant scent, the broad chest that could never be held tightly enough.

He loved how Choi Yeorok always appeared when he needed him most. Even if it was a dream, he was happy.

‘You’re really hopeless.’

The man spoke as if he was somewhat troubled.

Eunho continued repeating that he was sorry. He wrapped his arms tighter around the man’s waist and buried his face in his chest.

The warmth of his body and the beat of his heart felt strangely real, but Eunho’s strength soon faded again. Still, letting out his feelings this way brought him a bit of peace.

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When he woke, the fever was gone and his body felt lighter. Eunho got out of bed and went downstairs.

Seo Taehwa was the only one left in the quiet house. Sitting at the table, he looked dazed. Eunho called him, but the man didn’t seem to hear, lost in thought.

“Hyung.”

When Eunho came closer and called again, Seo Taehwa finally turned his head. A surprised expression appeared on his vacant face.

“You’re okay? How’s your body?”

“I’m fine.”

Seo Taehwa quickly handed him some water and placed the back of his hand on Eunho’s cheek. When he felt the cool skin, he let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank god. Your fever lasted so long, I thought something bad might happen.”

“Hyung, were you okay?”

That troubled look from earlier still weighed on his mind. He asked carefully but Seo Taehwa smiled.

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m the same as always. Sit down. I’ll heat up some porridge.”

Then he hurried away.

Eunho pulled out a chair and sat down, watching Seo Taehwa’s back as he moved busily. Even while heating the porridge, he sighed several times and rubbed his face.

There was definitely something he couldn’t talk about. But Eunho knew he wasn’t the right person to ask.

He decided not to insist. He just needed to take care of himself properly. That alone would probably help Seo Taehwa a little.

***

After his official debut ended successfully, Eunho’s daily life changed in several ways.

First, he received a credit card under Choi Yoonho’s name. He wasn’t just supposed to hold it but to use it openly. That meant he had to go out often.

At least two or three times a week, he made mandatory outings. He went shopping and ate outside. But there was a rule. Seo Taehwa had to go with him.

Whenever he went out, he could never predict what might happen or who he might meet, so he was constantly cautious. He had to speak, smile, and even breathe like Choi Yoonho. Every move had to be calculated. It was exhausting, so during those times, he completely became Choi Yoonho.

The hardest part of being Choi Yoonho was having to act cruel toward people. Even if it was just an act, it weighed heavily on him.

But there was no choice but to endure. Once he let go of himself and sank fully into the role, he reached a point where he couldn’t tell if he was Sim Eunho or Choi Yoonho anymore. And when the act ended, a terrible headache always followed like a backlash.

Eunho steadied his breathing inside the car. He tried to clear Choi Yoonho from his mind and focus on regaining his scattered self, just as Ahn Jaehwan had taught him. He had drained too much energy today, and his vision was spinning.

“Hyung… I can’t remember what I just did.”

He told Seo Taehwa about his condition. Seo Taehwa, who had been looking at his phone in the driver’s seat, turned his head slowly. His expression had hardened slightly. Then he forced his usual gentle smile.

“You must have gone too deep into it. It’s okay. You did really well today.”

Eunho felt a little relieved at the praise. He leaned his tired body against the leather seat. What was next on the schedule again… right, they were going to eat dinner.

He let out a weary sigh at the thought of having to act again while eating. His stomach was empty, but he didn’t know if food would go down properly.

They arrived at a Korean restaurant somewhere in Seoul. The elegant hanok gave off such a refined atmosphere that he felt like he’d be thrown out if he made one wrong move, so his shoulders slumped slightly.

He thought Seo Taehwa would go in with him, but Seo Taehwa pushed him alone through the entrance. Before he could react, a woman in a fine hanbok approached and bowed.

“Mr. Choi Yoonho, I’ll show you to your seat.”

He followed her down a long corridor.

The old wooden floor shone with a sheen of oil. On the left side of the hallway, there were dozens of sliding paper doors, while the open right side showed a view like an ink painting.

But Eunho saw none of it. He could only swallow his nervousness.

They reached a secluded room. The woman knocked lightly on the wooden door.

“Your guest has arrived.”

Her calm tone still made his heart tighten. The door slid open, and Eunho stepped inside.

“…Ah.”

At the head of the long table sat Choi Yeorok. Sitting cross-legged with his back straight, he lifted his eyes and stared at Eunho’s startled face.

Behind him, the sliding door closed with a sound. Once they were completely alone, a trace of amusement appeared in his eyes.

“So, that’s what you bought on your shopping trip?”

Under that gaze, Eunho rubbed his arm, unable to hide his embarrassment.

“It looks nice. Sit down.”

Yeorok gestured toward the seat across from him with a tilt of his chin. Eunho hesitated, then sat down in his place. He was still surprised.

“…I didn’t know you’d be here.”

“I wanted to have a meal outside with you, Sim Eunho-ssi.”

Yeorok lifted a porcelain teapot and filled Eunho’s cup himself. The scent of warm chrysanthemum tea rose gently and brushed his nose.

“How’s your body?”

He asked it in his usual calm tone. It had been two weeks since the foundation event ended. Yeorok had been busy, and Eunho had been buried in his role as Choi Yoonho.

“I’m fine.”

“How’s the acting?”

“I’ve been doing my best, but…”

Eunho took a sip of the cooled tea and looked up. Every time he saw Choi Yeorok sitting straight and composed, his heart trembled like an earthquake. Even so, his gaze kept drifting toward him. He couldn’t look away.

Yeorok knew exactly where that gaze was aimed, yet he pretended not to notice. While wiping his hands carefully with a warm towel, he spoke.

“Korean food is fine, right?”

“Yes.”

“I’ve already chosen the dishes.”

As soon as he finished speaking, there was a knock at the door. Yeorok answered briefly, “Yes.” The door slid open, and the same woman appeared.

“Chairman, may we serve the meal?”

“Yes, please.”

The moment another person appeared, Eunho instinctively straightened his posture. He stared at the table with a stiff face, and as soon as the door closed again, his expression softened back to its usual mild look.

But the door opened once more, and several trays of food came in. While the dishes were being set, Eunho slipped back into Choi Yoonho’s manner.

When the wooden door slid shut again, Eunho kept glancing toward it repeatedly. He reacted to every small sound like a meerkat, and Yeorok laughed.

“No one else will come in now.”

“……”

“You don’t have to act. Just eat comfortably.”