Chapter 13 – If You’re Willing

Jiang Ruo suspected he had bad luck with Jin Garden.

Others came here for pleasure, but he came for suffering.

The film crew had taken a two-day break, and he had planned to use this precious time to handle the preliminary work for his lawsuit. But who knew that after finishing his meetings in the afternoon, he would end up at a drinking table again.

It all started because one of the friends who was also suing the agency with him was a social butterfly. Before everyone had even gathered, she had already arranged for dinner with their lawyer that evening, saying she wanted to express her gratitude.

With the trial imminent, it was only natural for her to try to ingratiate herself with the lawyer. Jiang Ruo had even prepared red envelopes. However, this social butterfly threw a wrench in his plans, leaving him no choice but to agree when cornered in front of so many people.

Now, with his heart elsewhere while physically present, Jiang Ruo was typing on his phone under the table. He told An He that he might return very late tonight, and asked him to eat dinner early and go to sleep.

He was still worried about his health.

An He replied quickly: I’m outside.

Jiang Ruo was shocked: Where are you?!

An He: On the way, I’ll be at Jin Garden soon.

Jiang Ruo: …Don’t tell me you’re coming to pick me up.

An He: Of course not, I have an appointment.

Jiang Ruo: With whom?

An He: Why are you like my mom?

Jiang Ruo: If your mom cared half as much as I do, you wouldn’t be bullied by others.

An He: Hehe~.

Jiang Ruo: What’s with the hehe and the tilde?!

An He: Don’t worry, this guy is reliable.

Jiang Ruo: Where are there reliable men in this world?

An He: How could you lump yourself in that category too?

Jiang Ruo: I can’t stop you, but please be careful. Don’t lose your head over a handsome face.

An He: You’re the same, aren’t you? When you see a handsome guy, you can’t help but jump at the chance to get laid.

The real Jiang Ruo cursed silently. Teaching others required setting a good example first. Now, the two of them were equally guilty, neither one better than the other.

Perhaps due to the noise, the social butterfly next to him leaned over. “What’s wrong, Ruoruo?”

Jiang Ruo shuddered. “Sister, please change the nickname.”

“How come, isn’t Ruoruo your pet name?” Sister Social Butterfly asked. “What do your family call you?”

“My family doesn’t call me anything.”

“Why?”

Jiang Ruo pointed downwards and hushed. “Because they’re all down there, I can’t hear them even if they called.”

It was now the social butterfly’s turn to shudder. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

“It’s alright.” Jiang Ruo smiled. “Let’s eat, this meal isn’t cheap.”

He wanted to leave as soon as possible. Staying here longer might lead to more strange encounters.

Half an hour later, Jiang Ruo held his forehead in despair, cursing himself for stirring up trouble where there was none.

The feast continued, and one of the other actors involved in the lawsuit suddenly asked if he could bring a friend to join them. There were empty seats available, and no one objected.

But who would have thought that the friend he mentioned was Zhang Shaoyuan.

And clearly, they weren’t just friends. The boy, two years younger than Jiang Ruo, was shyly pulling Zhang Shaoyuan to sit down, arranging the utensils and serving dishes for him as if afraid others couldn’t see the nature of their relationship.

Jiang Ruo felt sick to his stomach several times, thinking that this old man really had no shame, each new conquest younger than the last. Next time, would he go after minors?

As he thought this, Jiang Ruo glanced over several times. One hand holding chopsticks, the other tapping on his phone under the table, asking Lin Xiao if she had heard any recent news about the boy.

Lin Xiao was a makeup artist, constantly traveling between various film sets, and was well-informed about industry gossip. If she could find out something through this connection, it would be best to trip up that bastard Zhang Shaoyuan. If not, he could at least warn the boy through someone else — Zhang Shaoyuan was no good, beware of being completely used and left with nothing, both emotionally and financially.

In the middle of his inquiry, he suddenly heard someone calling his name.

“Isn’t this Jiang Ruo?” Zhang Shaoyuan feigned surprise. “Never thought I’d run into you here.”

Jiang Ruo felt a chill down his spine. He put down his phone, raised his head, and forced a smile. “Yeah, what a coincidence.”

Zhang Shaoyuan feigned confusion. “I heard everyone seated here is planning to sue the company. Are you also trying to terminate your contract?”

Jiang Ruo had no choice but to reply, “Yeah, strength in numbers.”

“Why don’t you ask Young Master Xi to help you?” Zhang Shaoyuan looked around. “He has an entire legal team. Just assigning one of them to you would save you from all this trouble.”

He was referring to the current elaborate banquet they were having.

Jiang Ruo had a rough idea of the purpose behind this guy’s visit.

The expressions on everyone’s faces changed dramatically, their eyes conveying enough to piece together a complete conversation.

— Could this Young Master Xi be that Young Master Xi?

— Could there be another Young Master Xi?

— Goodness, Jiang Ruo has some skills.

— Not necessarily. Didn’t President Zhang say that he didn’t even assign a lawyer?

— No wonder he’s so stingy…

Thinking about how he had been lamenting the cost of this meal before arriving, Jiang Ruo felt a sense of helplessness akin to confessing without being coerced. He wondered how to deal with this; last time, when rumors spread slowly, Xi Yufeng had enough time to make a trip to the filming set. Given the current situation, he couldn’t possibly call him and ask him to come over immediately.

Perhaps the rumors spreading within the film crew were also initiated by Zhang Shaoyuan.

Jiang Ruo saw Zhang Shaoyuan smiling with a crooked mouth, his smug and malicious expression making him seem like a despicable person. Jiang Ruo clenched his phone, wanting to throw it at his face.

He didn’t throw it, though. It was something he had bought with his money, and he couldn’t bear to waste it.

“It’s just a meal, not much trouble,” Jiang Ruo said with a fake smile. “After all, I’m not as fortunate as President Zhang, who can eat for free everywhere. I’m afraid of getting arrested if someone reports me.”

This veiled remark instantly changed Zhang Shaoyuan’s expression. “You, you…”

He repeated ‘you’ several times, then finally, in a fit of rage, chose the harshest sentence: “Speaking of which, Young Master Xi probably doesn’t know that you’ve been in my bed, right?”

Jiang Ruo’s eyes turned cold, and he pursed his lips, staring straight at the person opposite him.

Seeing that he wasn’t responding, Zhang Shaoyuan became pleased with himself again. “But he did see you asking me for money. Tsk, I wonder what he’ll think when he realizes that he slept with someone I wore out, a worn-out shoe.”

Almost as soon as he finished speaking, Jiang Ruo sprang to his feet and grabbed the closest dish, hurling it diagonally with great force.

It happened so fast that no one could see clearly. Jiang Ruo was already standing beside Zhang Shaoyuan, lifting the man dripping with oil and soup from his seat, and landing two punches on his head.

The scene turned chaotic. After their initial shock, everyone rushed forward to break up the fight. Jiang Ruo stared wide-eyed at Zhang Shaoyuan. “What did you say? You fucking dare repeat that!”

Zhang Shaoyuan, hit by the same person twice, was still filled with fear and surprise. Last time, it was in private, and Jiang Ruo’s boldness could still be considered within reason. This time, in public, how could he dare to do such a thing?

Perhaps once the situation calmed down and his emotions settled, Jiang Ruo would regret his impulsiveness. But at that moment, he couldn’t control himself.

Even though Zhang Shaoyuan was unable to speak, Jiang Ruo’s ears and mind were still echoing with those words —

Worn-out shoe, your mother is just a worn-out shoe anyone can have.

You, born from an old worn-out shoe, are a little worn-out shoe.

You dared to seduce your own stepfather, truly shameless.

What kind of dance are you learning? It’s more like seductive tricks to lure men, isn’t it?

… …

Years later, the voice was still terrifyingly clear, causing Jiang Ruo’s breath to tremble.

It was precisely at this moment that Jiang Ruo’s momentary lapse allowed Zhang Shaoyuan to take advantage. The latter struggled to retreat, and as soon as he broke free, he reached for a stool leg, intending to use it to retaliate.

But he couldn’t lift it. No matter how hard he tried, it remained immovable.

The already disfigured Zhang Shaoyuan turned his head. From below, he first saw a black leather shoe pressing against the stool leg, then moving upward, he noticed a hand resting on the chair back. It seemed casual but was subtly exerting force.

Continuing upward, he met a pair of sharp eyes that now radiated a coldness akin to ice. Just a casual glance made Zhang Shaoyuan’s knees weaken, almost causing him to kneel.

“President Zhang has quite the refined taste,” said Xi Yufeng. “I was only a few minutes late, and I almost missed a good show.”

It seemed like an eternity, yet perhaps only a few brief seconds passed. When Jiang Ruo had vented his anger and deflated, he was pulled up from the ground by a strong hand. Still in a daze, he barely registered the events.

He could hardly remember anything else, but he recalled that the person who might not have come even if called had led him away without saying much, merely telling him, “It’s alright.”

Nothing to worry about? Jiang Ruo frowned.

The wound he had concealed for so many years had been ripped open tonight, exposed to the prying eyes of passersby for their commentary. How could everything be fine?

He had no intention of explaining to those uninvolved. Sitting inside the warm car, he turned his head to gaze out the window, ignoring everyone else.

He seemed to hear the driver ask, “Where shall we take Mr. Jiang?” Without waiting for an answer, the car began to move.

Dazed throughout the journey, Jiang Ruo slowly opened his eyes upon sensing the car come to a stop.

An unfamiliar place, a palely lit underground parking garage.

Turning his head, he saw a face as cold and aloof as ever.

Just one glance was enough before he looked away. Jiang Ruo remembered that day when this person stood upstairs, looking down at him with a hint of contempt in his eyes.

He didn’t want to see that look again.

Perhaps his silent resistance drained the other party’s patience. After a while, Jiang Ruo heard Xi Yufeng ask, “Were you forced to drink?”

For a long time, Jiang Ruo exhaled. “No.”

He assumed there would be further questions, considering how lively things had been earlier. He didn’t know how much had been overheard.

However, after a brief wait, the sound that entered his ears was the car door opening and closing.

Xi Yufeng got out of the car.

He leaned against the car door, lighting a cigarette.

He smoked slowly. From Jiang Ruo’s angle, he could only see his silhouette, broad shoulders, and a cold white collar.

There was still loneliness, giving the impression of someone in dire need of companionship.

As the cigarette neared the filter, the other side of the car door opened, and Jiang Ruo stepped out.

Xi Yufeng turned his head, and the two locked eyes for a moment, neither saying a word.

Jiang Ruo followed Xi Yufeng, walking behind him into the elevator, watching him unlock the fingerprint lock, and stepping into the house. Everything seemed to follow instinct.

Seeking shelter, trying to find a safe space to lick his wounds.

And this task was too difficult to accomplish alone.

So, the instant the door closed, Jiang Ruo hurried forward, embracing the figure that was usually distant.

Caught off guard by the sudden impact, Xi Yufeng stumbled forward, remaining stationary for a moment before letting out a low laugh. “Still saying you didn’t drink?”

In his muddled state, Jiang Ruo recalled having two glasses at the beginning of the feast.

“Just two,” Jiang Ruo thought. It couldn’t be considered drinking, just two glasses.

But he couldn’t explain the current situation. Xi Yufeng turned around, pinching his chin to make him look up, and Jiang Ruo didn’t even flinch.

This gaze was too close, close enough for Jiang Ruo to recall that night when they had been similarly close.

That time, it was Xi Yufeng who had been incoherent, but this time, it was his turn.

Jiang Ruo also smiled, his lips curving upward, his bright eyes slightly squinting.

“I know everything,” he said.

Before Xi Yufeng could question him, Jiang Ruo continued, “Now everyone knows.”

Referring to their relationship, previously mere conjecture and whispers confined to a certain circle, now it had been seen by so many bystanders. As long as he had any fame in the entertainment industry, this should have already trended on the hot search list by now.

Xi Yufeng, however, showed little reaction, calmly countering, “So what?”

Taking advantage of his tilted head, Jiang Ruo draped his arm over Xi Yufeng’s shoulder and looped it around his neck.

Fearing he might not hear clearly, Jiang Ruo leaned in closer. “Since it’s come to this, don’t you plan to make this relationship official?”

Almost as soon as the words left his mouth, he heard the person he was holding pause in his breathing.

That night, Jiang Ruo thought he experienced a lucid dream.

Initially, it was cold, because of the somewhat rough actions of the person atop him. There was no foreplay, no warmth, and they delved straight into the main act.

But gradually, warmth crept in, as they found a familiar rhythm, including the synchronicity of their heartbeats and the stickiness of damp skin pressed together.

They kissed countless times, feeling each other’s breath. Rather than enjoying kissing itself, Jiang Ruo relished marking the other’s body with his scent, experiencing a sense of accomplishment in dragging him down into the filthy mundane world.

Fingers entwined in thick black hair, tightening and relaxing intermittently. Jiang Ruo’s gaze was unfocused, his consciousness scattered, vaguely thinking that this was no cat but rather a tiger, inherently vicious.

As they approached the climax, when thoughts began to slip away, Jiang Ruo’s mind drifted to An He’s phrase about living for the moment.

Unfortunately, happiness doesn’t reach extremes. Happiness always coexists with pain.

The next morning, after showering and returning to the room, Xi Yufeng saw Jiang Ruo sitting on the bed, staring blankly at his phone.

Hearing the door open, Jiang Ruo slowly turned his face, then his eyes traveled from top to bottom and back up again, finally revealing a satisfied expression as if he’d had his fill. “Good morning, President Xi.”

Ignoring him, Xi Yufeng walked to the bedside, placing a glass of water there.

Without caring whether the water was meant for him, Jiang Ruo leaned over to grab it and drank.

Halfway through the glass, he licked his lips and asked, “Tell me, what are we now?”

Xi Yufeng was standing in front of the closet, selecting clothes for the day. After moving everything over, he hadn’t had time to organize, so things were a bit messy.

Thus, he didn’t immediately respond, allowing Jiang Ruo to speak first.

Jiang Ruo’s tone was laced with amusement, as he asked and answered himself, “The relationship of having slept together twice.”

Apparently dissatisfied with this answer, Xi Yufeng turned around with his shirt in hand, his face as cold as ever.

He had smiled just last night.

Pouting, Jiang Ruo lowered his head and continued fiddling with his phone. Last night’s social butterfly sister had sent a message, a thumbs-up emoji: “Ruoruo, you’re not weak at all!”

It was unclear whether she was referring to beating Zhang Shaoyuan to a “colorful” pulp or climbing into Xi Yufeng’s bed.

Taking advantage of the opportunity with the person right in front of him, Jiang Ruo casually asked, “How’s Zhang Shaoyuan?”

Xi Yufeng was buttoning his shirt, replying with only two words: “Not dead.”

For some inexplicable reason, this struck Jiang Ruo’s funny bone, and he chuckled a few times, emerging from under the covers. He crawled from the head of the bed to the foot, then stepped onto the floor barefoot.

Moving to the front of Xi Yufeng, he naturally pushed aside his hands and helped him button his shirt.

“I wanted to help you last time,” Jiang Ruo said. “I was too tired to get up then.”

He didn’t know why he was saying this, but the atmosphere felt right, and he didn’t want the mood to cool down without saying something.

Surprisingly, Xi Yufeng didn’t refuse. His arms hung by his sides as Jiang Ruo buttoned each one in turn.

Reaching the top, at the position of the Adam’s apple, Jiang Ruo hesitated whether to button this one. Lifting his eyes to ask, he met Xi Yufeng’s gaze.

Amber irises, they should belong to a gentle person, yet they were still deep and inscrutable.

Pausing for a moment, Jiang Ruo then grinned. “If you keep looking at me like this, I might think President Xi really wants to keep me, to have me button your shirt every day.”

His tone was jesting, but his aim was to establish boundaries.

He took the initiative to halt, driven by a fear that things might spiral out of control if they progressed further.

People spend their lives pursuing a sense of security. Once they sense danger ahead, they subconsciously retreat. They prefer to remain in a relationship defined by fleeting encounters, where the risk is virtually zero, and it’s easy to withdraw.

However, Jiang Ruo forgot that retreating is a sign of weakness, a fear that Xi Yufeng would never harbor, not even crossing his mind.

Therefore, Xi Yufeng had no intention of stopping. Looking at Jiang Ruo, he said, “If you’re willing.”