SLC 12

“Now please submit your answer sheets.”

“……”

Kim Jinkyung sat absentmindedly at the desk.

The students sitting next to him stood from their seats, handed their answer sheets to the teaching assistant, and left the classroom.

“Time is up. Please organize your answer sheets.”

“……”

While Kim Jinkyung stared at the answer sheet, the students sitting next to him stood up one by one again and left.

“Please confirm your name and student number accurately, place your answer sheet in the designated spot, and exit.”

“……”

“Hey, what are you doing? Let’s go.”

Someone tapped Kim Jinkyung’s shoulder from behind. When Kim Jinkyung turned around with “Huh?”, Go Jinyoung grabbed his arm.

“Time’s up. You can’t write anymore.”

“…Uh, yes.”

It was strange. Hadn’t they said to submit the answer sheets earlier? Kim Jinkyung hurriedly grabbed his bag and came out. When he checked the classroom, it was not the one he had entered earlier.

What? This is clearly the Wednesday exam subject…

“What are you spacing out for like that? Did you do well on the exam?” Go Jinyoung, who had dragged Kim Jinkyung out, asked.

“Pardon? What exam?”

“What exam? The one we just took.”

Go Jinyoung pointed to the book in Kim Jinkyung’s hand. The latter stared at the textbook and muttered, “I don’t know.”

“Don’t know, my ass. And yet you’ll get an A+ or A again.”

“No. I have no memory of taking the exam.”

From Tuesday to the exams taken today, he couldn’t remember anything. Kim Jinkyung thought about what on earth he had done.

“Humility like that is damn excessive. Come on, let’s go drink.”

Go Jinyoung dragged Kim Jinkyung, who was still in a daze. When he came to his senses, Go Jinyoung was pouring beer.

“Hey, so anyway. I met her twice last week, right? We seem to click in conversation, but…”

Go Jinyoung was a straw. Unlike a funnel that starts with various topics and converges into one, he chattered consistently on the same topic throughout.

Women.

“So I got a decent girl’s contact while studying at a study cafe, and I said let’s meet after exams…”

Go Jinyoung’s voice faded dreamily, as Kim Jinkyung’s mind clouded.

“…..”

“…Are you listening?”

“……”

“Hey. Kim Jinkyung.”

Go Jinyoung waved his hand in front of Kim Jinkyung. The startled Kim Jinkyung lifted his head with “Yes?”

“What are you thinking so deeply about? Is something wrong with you?”

“No. Nothing’s wr…”

In Kim Jinkyung’s hazy mind, a scene he had submerged below the surface emerged. Mok Seongha’s high nose bridge nudging his thigh as he licked his burn…

“……!”

Kim Jinkyung picked up the beer glass in front of him and started gulping it down.

“What the hell? Why all of a sudden? Why are you drinking like that?”

Kim Jinkyung emptied the glass without even breathing. The surprised Go Jinyoung just blinked as Jinkyung placed the empty glass in front of him.

“More please.”

“What?”

“Alcohol. I want to drink more.”

“Uh, uh? Sure.”

Go Jinyoung filled the empty glass and Kim Jinkyung gulped it down again.

“Drink slowly. What’s with you? Is something really wrong?”

Kim Jinkyung set down the beer glass.

“Hyung.”

“Yeah?”

“Can we order soju?”

Beer was not enough to blur his mind. After Go Jinyoung agreed and ordered soju, Kim Jinkyung started mixing soju with beer and drinking.

“Hey. Drink slowly. You’ll die like that.”

“…I think it’d be okay to die.”

“Why? What’s going on? Ah, did your girlfriend dump you?”

“……”

“It happens in life. Why get hung up on that. Was it your first girlfriend?”

Go Jinyoung filled the glass with a somehow pleased look.

Kim Jinkyung continued drinking the alcohol without a word.

That day, Mok Seongha who had entered the bathroom stall held Kim Jinkyung’s legs apart and licked the inside of his thigh. Or, more precisely, he treated the burn from the hot coffee by licking every inch with his tongue. Kim Jinkyung did not know what mechanism it was, but the wounds where Mok Seongha had licked with his tongue all disappeared.

After licking the wounds, Mok Seongha stood from his seat and handed Kim Jinkyung new pants. Then he fiercely threatened him, “Don’t tell anyone.” When the dazed Kim Jinkyung stood without any reaction, Mok Seongha fiercely growled again.

‘If you speak, I’ll kill you.’

It felt like he had suffered a grievance even though he had received a good deed. Kim Jinkyung had to nod absentmindedly.

“The girlfriend you said you were living with back then? See, that’s why you shouldn’t cohabitate. Don’t live together too hastily. You need to meet people while keeping appropriate personal space, in that sense, the girl I dated before…”

Go Jinyoung excitedly chattered about his own romance theory. In Kim Jinkyung’s mind, things he should forget started tangling with the alcohol buzz. Mok Seongha’s nose bridge, the large hand holding the thigh, the tongue and lips touching the inside of his leg…

Kim Jinkyung filled the empty glass full with soju. It was not a memory that could be forgotten with beer.

“If you break up, just meet someone else. You can meet plenty of good people again. What’s lacking about you? Meet others. And if there are good women around them…”

Go Jinyoung inevitably started his introduction spiel. Anyway, he did not listen to others’ words. No matter what was said, he ultimately enjoyed chit-chat only on topics he liked.

Thinking that this might actually be better, Kim Jinkyung drank alcohol continuously. The last memory was Go Jinyoung’s face as he closed his eyes and hummed along to the song playing in the shop, saying it reminded him of his first love.

When he opened his eyes, Kim Jinkyung found himself staring at the unfamiliar ceiling before he turned his head.

“Ah!”

Upon confirming the face of the man lying next to him sleeping soundly, Kim Jinkyung sat up in horror. Go Jinyoung, awakened from sleep, sat up groggily, scratched his head, and asked if he was awake.

“Wh-why is sunbae here…”

“Because it’s my house, so I’m here. You don’t remember yesterday?”

“……”

After literally ruining the exam, he drank with Go Jinyoung, and then… Kim Jinkyung tried hard to squeeze out his memory, but only Go Jinyoung’s face chattering about romance throughout came to mind.

“You were drunk and said I’d put you in a taxi, but you clung to my pants leg saying you’d die if you went, so… haaam. I just brought you to my house.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what? Let’s go eat hangover soup.”

Go Jinyoung stood from his seat. Since he usually staked his life on self-management to look good to women, Go Jinyoung’s body was too muscled.

Even if it was a one sided crush that was already over, how could he look at that and feel nothing. He even looked ugly. Before, Kim Jinkyung had thought that at least his face was worth looking at.

“What, are you suddenly feeling respect because you’re seeing your hyung’s handsome muscles?”

Go Jinyoung bent his arm and playfully flexed his biceps. Kim Jinkyung waved his hand and said “Go wash up.”

“Yeah. If you want to wash too, use the bathroom over there.”

A place where one person lived alone had two bathrooms. …No, there were even people who lived alone in absurdly huge mansions, so…

“……”

Kim Jinkyung heard the sound of blood draining from his head. The memory he had barely submerged below consciousness with alcohol’s power gently emerged. How on earth should he evaporate this memory? Kim Jinkyung clutched his head and sat down on the spot. Then he suddenly recalled the tutoring appointment with Mok Seongha.

What date is today?

While calculating in his head, Kim Jinkyung hurriedly searched for his phone in his bag.

78 missed calls.

Upon checking, 34 were from Secretary Kang’s number, and 44 were from an unknown number. Kim Jinkyung pondered and first called the unknown number.

After two rings, he heard a low voice.

–Hey.

“……”

Usually, no matter how angry, people answer with hello.

–You know what time it is now?

“I’m sorry. After the exam ended yesterday, I was so tired that I just…”

He tried to make a plausible excuse that he had fallen asleep as is.

“Ah, right. Jinkyung-ah. The shower faucet in that bathroom is broken, so only cold water comes out. Wait a bit and wash.”

…If Go Jinyoung, with only a towel around his waist and a toothbrush in his mouth, had not appeared saying words that the other party could not help but misunderstand.

“……”

A cold silence poured from the other side of the phone. Kim Jinkyung inwardly called upon God, Buddha, and Jesus, whom he did not even believe in.

“Uh, what. You were on a call?”

Go Jinyoung pulled his toothpaste-covered mouth into a grin and winked. When Kim Jinkyung urgently gestured for him to go in, he winked one eye and returned to the bathroom.

“…I’m sorry. I…”

–When are you coming?

“Pardon?”

–When are you coming, I said. You skipped tutoring yesterday too.

Kim Jinkyung quickly checked the clock.

“In an hour and a half, no, within an hour, I’ll go.”

–Come within thirty minutes.

If you’re going to do that, why ask what time?

Kim Jinkyung replied yes while trying hard to stay calm. The call from Mok Seongha ended like that. Kim Jinkyung sighed and threw the phone onto the bed.

…It was the worst.

‎

‎

One should not declare the worst so easily.

Even when he arrived at the mansion, received Secretary Kang’s cold glare, and entered the study, Kim Jinkyung was convinced that it couldn’t be worse.

But.

“Take them off.”

“Pardon?”

“Pants, take them off.”

“Why?!”

Hugging his bag, Kim Jinkyung looked up at the man who abruptly tried to take off his pants.

“To check the wound.”

“It’s healed!”

“It is healed, so you skipped tutoring to do that with a man?”

“No, it’s not that I did that…”

“Take them off anyway since I need to confirm.”

Mok Seongha was persistent. Kim Jinkyung had no choice but to unbuckle and lower his pants. Mok Seongha thoroughly checked Kim Jinkyung’s thigh before releasing him.

“If there’s anywhere I missed… What is this?”

“……”

Kim Jinkyung, who had been holding back tears with red-rimmed eyes, answered “no” as he pulled up his pants.

“You’re crying? Why?”

His eyes showed he really did not understand. Kim Jinkyung roughly wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

“Let’s start the lesson.”

It was the worst. This was the real worst.

Kim Jinkyung picked up his bag and walked to the desk.

“Why are you crying?”

Mok Seongha followed and asked.

“…Did you do the homework?”

Kim Jinkyung changed the subject. He found the previously assigned printout, placed it on the desk, and then Mok Seongha asked again.

“I asked why you’re crying.”

“…Because I’m pathetic.”

Kim Jinkyung answered while covering his face with both hands. And he felt even more pathetic after saying that.

At this age, he lowers his pants himself out of fear of a younger man, panics over a medical act done without any intent and ruins all his exams, cries in fear, and above all…

“You were always pathetic.”

The guy who was trying to “comfort” him.

“…I’m even more pathetic than I thought.”

Kim Jinkyung covered his face with both hands, buried his head on the desk, and started crying. Could a person really be this pathetic? No matter how simple an emotion was, he should have at least chosen the right person. Of all people, a selectively hikikomori¹ lunatic bastard who turned into a black panther when he got wet….

“Why are you crying over something like that? It’s useless.”

It really was useless. Since It was a feeling that would meet its end before the other person ever noticed it.

Then why did I still end up….

“Don’t cry. Just solve problems.”

“…Yes.”

Kim Jinkyung roughly wiped his tears and lifted his head. Mok Seongha pulled out one tissue and handed it to Kim Jinkyung. The latter felt tears well up again.

“I said solve problems.”

“……”

Psychopath panther bastard.

Kim Jinkyung wiped his tears with the tissue while cursing the man who had shown him pointless kindness.

Thus began another harmless one-sided crush.

1. a Japanese term. It refers to someone who withdraws almost completely from society and stays shut inside their home for long periods, often months or years. They avoid school, work, and social relationships, and they usually rely on family while isolating themselves. ↩︎