DSB 46

“Yutis. As I said last time, I seem to be a bit oblivious.”

Even after living for hundreds of years, his awareness for such things never improved. He often failed to notice what made others frustrated with him.

Even when they explained it, he still could not understand. Just like when he could not comprehend why Karon was worried about him not leaving the bedchamber for three years.

“I do not understand things even when told. So speak honestly. If I can understand after hearing it, I will consider it.”

“This is only my own problem.”

“Then say it.”

“…I do not wish to burden you.”

“You are already a burden.”

Yutis bit his lip for a long time. He anxiously clenched his hands and his ears turned red as if he had suddenly grown shy.

He slowly straightened his body and sat down beside the bed.

“I want to be someone special to you.”

Did he not hear me? I feel like I said this several times already.

“You are already special…”

“I fell in love with you at first sight.”

Lebel’s eyes widened at the unexpected revelation. He wanted to see Yutis’s face, but Yutis had turned away, so he couldn’t see his expression at all.

“That is why I do not like it when you say you spent the rut with me only out of duty…”

“Oh… you mean you love me…”

Lebel was startled.

It seems he wants to be seen as even more special to me.

When and how did he fall for me? Was there anything about me worth falling for at first sight?

Lebel recalled their first meeting. He could not make sense of it. When Yutis saw his confused face, he spoke in a weary voice.

“That day, the day I first met you… I had planned to reject the bride they sent to the North.”

“Yes, I know.”

Everyone had said excitedly that Yutis must have changed his mind after seeing the imperial envoy, thinking he had no choice but to accept the agreement.

“But that day, I sensed your pheromones. I was drawn by that scent, and my steps moved toward it, and there you were.”

Yutis’s voice trembled as he said that even now his chest felt full whenever he remembered that moment.

Lebel recalled that first meeting too. So the reason their eyes met from afar was pheromones. Yutis had once said he had smelled his.

Ah, so that was why he was certain I was an omega.

“When you descended from the sky, I thought an angel had come down.”

I did not think I would hear that angel story again.

“You were so beautiful that I could not look away.”

When Lebel saw Yutis nervously licking his lips and gripping his hands tightly, he felt something strange.

That sweet voice brushing against his ears almost made him want to scratch the feeling away.

“I understand that you fell in love at first sight. But do you still feel the same now?”

Lebel knew his appearance was beautiful, whether he wanted to or not. Even people who showed hostility toward him grew hesitant once they saw his face.

But attraction born from appearance alone never lasted.

When Lebel said that, Yutis lifted his head. His face was still red, but his expression was dark as if something displeased him.

“Since I fell in love at first sight, it might seem that I loved you for your looks. I know that can make my feelings sound insincere.”

“That is not necessarily true…”

“I will not deny that I was drawn to your scent and your beauty from afar. I don’t deny that I first fell for your pleasant scent and beautiful looks from afar, but as we lived together, I fell for you even more.”

“Hmm…”

That was even more strange.

Lebel knew that his behavior often differed from human norms. That was why people stared at him and then made odd faces when he spoke.

And Yutis, who rarely left his side, had seen plenty of those strange behaviors.

“I love your calm voice and graceful movements. I love the confidence you have when you clearly state your will even though you seem delicate. I love how you look when you shiver in the cold or wriggle under the blanket. I want to be your strength. When you cannot open your eyes properly, or when you struggle with your meals…”

“Wait. How far is this going?”

He had listened out of curiosity, but now his face felt hot. Yutis’s tone grew more heated and his breathing turned rough, he showed no sign of stopping.

When Lebel interrupted him, Yutis let out a soft sigh of regret.

“It means there are countless moments when I have fallen for you.”

“So, you love me?”

“I love you. That is why I could not forgive myself. Because I wounded you.”

“Well, that…”

Lebel lowered his gaze slightly.

What should he say? This was the first time he had experienced something like this.

Strictly speaking, demons had confessed love to him before, but this feeling was different. He felt a tickling sensation in his chest, it was not unpleasant.

Suddenly, he remembered what the Demon God had once said.

He had told him not to get too attached. At the time, Lebel had thought it was needless worry, but it had not been.

Apparently, he had come to like this human far more than he had realized.

Had the Demon God sensed it and warned him to keep his distance? But it was already too late.

Was this feeling similar to what he felt when his subordinates had admired and followed him? He could not tell the difference.

“You do not have to love me.”

Lebel had many subordinates. He thought it natural that demons obeyed him, but he had never thought their affection or devotion was something he deserved by default.

Should I try liking my husband too, since he likes me this much? At least enough to feel something close to what he feels.

Then I should erase that unpleasant expression from his face as well. He probably does not even realize that he is wearing a look that seems bitter and disappointed.

“First, thank you. For thinking of me that way.”

“It is only my feeling. You do not need to feel burdened.”

Lebel stared at Yutis.

He had no thought of feeling burdened. But something had changed nonetheless. At the same time, he suddenly realized how Yutis was unlike any other human.

When Yutis had once asked him to stay with him, he had said it was natural. That was the same person who had once slept every day out of boredom.

Lebel had planned to live idly and die quietly. He had thought this marriage was merely formal.

The human before him pleased him, so he had planned to save him if his life was in danger. He had even been willing to risk his own life to protect him.

Even if this body died, the being called Lebel would not die. But the human before him would.

Even with that alone, he was not like the others.

If ‘special’ wasn’t enough, then he should say ‘I like him.’ That didn’t seem wrong either.

He still did not know if it was love.

“I do not know if my feelings are the same as yours, but I like you quite a lot too. My words that you are special, unlike other humans, are sincere. No one can be compared to you.”

“……!”

The tips of Yutis’s ears turned red.

***

Lebel stood before Damian. Damian frowned as he looked at Lebel, who had come to the main residence, and then he turned his gaze toward the window.

It was not a time when Lebel should be awake. Even if he had awakened, he usually stayed buried in bed for a long while before moving.

But now Damian knew that Lebel had become diligent, even if it was because of someone else.

He had also heard that Lebel had collapsed while chasing after Yutis during recovery.

He had not expected them to resolve it easily.

For Yutis, his rut that turned him into a monster was a deep trauma.

He had never wanted Lebel to see him like that. Yet not only had he shown it, but he had also injured him. Imagining how that must have tormented him was unbearable.

“You managed to persuade Yutis quite well.”

“What are you referring to?”

“Forget it if you do not know.”

Damian was sure that Yutis had returned to his routine because Lebel had done something.

Yutis must have been sincere enough to distance himself and then open his heart again.

He had sensed it for some time, but it still hurt. Yutis seemed to be walking a difficult path.

But Lebel had spent Yutis’s rut with him and survived.

Now Damian only wanted him to live well here, regardless of whether he was the emperor’s child or not.

If that was what Yutis wished for, and if it could bring him happiness.

Even so, each time he saw Lebel, he couldn’t help but sigh. It wasn’t because he disliked him, but because Lebel’s frail body hardly looked fit to endure a rut with Yutis.

“Have you grown tired of sleeping so much that you are sick of it now?”

“If someone heard that, they would think I sleep every day.”

“Do you not?”

“You can say I was forced into convalescence. That would sound better.”

Lebel spoke calmly as he sipped the tea Iol had given him.

“…Are you in good health now?”

“Everyone who sees me asks that. It is frustrating because no one believes me even when I say I am fine.”

“That means it had been serious.”

“Did Father also know about my condition?”

“……”

Damian drank his tea in silence.

The moment he heard that Lebel had entered Yutis’s room, he had run there immediately.

A a frail and sickly omega had entered the room of an alpha whose instincts had taken over during a rut. How could he sit still?

And that alpha was Yutis.