OPDPS 94

“Your Grace. It’s Aeryl. May I come in?”

It was Aeryl. The Grand Duke hesitated to respond. He didn’t want to see Aeryl right now. He needed to sort through the thoughts and emotions he’d felt today, to let this confusion settle.

But he couldn’t bring himself to tell him to go away. ‘I want to see him. I don’t want to see him.’ Conflicting emotions collided within him.

Before he could decide, Rynello opened the office door.

“Come in. I was just about to leave.”

“I hope I’m not interrupting?”

“Of course not. I’m the one who interrupted. Well then, I’ll be taking my leave!”

He ushered Aeryl inside and flashed a sly smile at the Grand Duke. Before the Grand Duke could say a word, the office door shut behind him.

“Rynello looked like he was in an awfully good mood. He seemed pretty serious earlier.”

Aeryl recalled how Rynello had stared at him with a troubled look, then followed the Grand Duke with a grim face. He’d worried something serious had happened.

Maybe… maybe Rynello had tried to convince him to switch physicians.

“Indeed.”

The Grand Duke spoke with a sigh, moving to open the windows in the office one by one. A rush of cold wind swept in, and Aeryl instinctively shrank from it.

‘Why’s he suddenly opening all the windows? Isn’t he cold?’

Aeryl studied him carefully. The two of them stood at opposite ends of the office. With the windows open, he could barely catch any of the Grand Duke’s pheromones.

Just from the atmosphere, he got the sense he wasn’t welcome. He must’ve come at the wrong time.

‘I should’ve just gone back to the inner quarters.’

After arriving at the outer quarters, the inventor and Raeler had headed to the rooms they’d be staying in. Aeryl had joined them to help out. He handed over some necessary medications and shared a few precautions, but as he left the room, a hollow feeling settled over him.

The cause was obvious—the inventor and his son.

He’d known they were close, but seeing it with his own eyes, it was more than he’d imagined. Their conversations, their actions—everything about them felt easy and familiar.

Their dynamic was so completely different from his own that it felt alien. Aeryl knew in theory that his relationship with his father had been unusual, that most parents cared for their children. But seeing it in person stirred strange emotions. So this is what a family is like? The emptiness gnawed at him.

Maybe that was why—he just didn’t want to be alone. And for some reason, the Grand Duke came to mind.

Wouldn’t he understand? Aeryl didn’t know the full story of the Grand Duke’s family, but the way he spoke of his father made him think they might be alike.

Even if that wasn’t the case, the Grand Duke always listened to him. He just wanted to talk.

“So, what brings you here?”

The Grand Duke asked, still standing at the far window.

“I didn’t get to examine you today.”

Aeryl offered the excuse. It stung that the Grand Duke hadn’t come closer, that he remained by the window. It made Aeryl feel like an unwelcome guest. The things he’d really wanted to say were suddenly hard to bring up.

“An examination…”

There was something self-mocking in his voice. It wasn’t like him, and it bothered Aeryl.

Now that he thought about it, earlier too—after finding out that the he couldn’t smell his own pheromones—the Grand Duke had called it a failure. Given the context, he was clearly referring to himself.

Sure, learning that his body was malfunctioning would upset anyone, but still—why call himself a failure?

Suppressing his curiosity, Aeryl focused on what he came to say—as a doctor should.

“This afternoon, in the forest, I saw your symptoms and came up with a new hypothesis. I’ve sorted out my thoughts, so I’d like to share it with you.”

“All right.”

The Grand Duke replied as he usually did.

‘Strange. Something’s off.’

With his sharp instincts, Aeryl picked up on it right away. Even though he’d been so dejected earlier, calling himself a failure, now he seemed completely uninterested in the topic. His mind was clearly elsewhere.

‘What is he thinking about?’

The Grand Duke’s face was expressionless, like a statue. No matter how long he stared, Aeryl couldn’t guess what he was thinking.

Usually, the pheromones helped him read the Grand Duke’s mood. But now, with the distance between them and the windows wide open, there wasn’t enough scent to smell anything at all.

‘I want to know.’

Aeryl had always been curious—he couldn’t stand not understanding something. He’d kept that tendency in check for a long time, but now, the Grand Duke—whom he thought he understood better than anyone—felt distant. It unsettled him.

Why is he like this today?

Frustrated, Aeryl took a step toward him.

“Aeryl! Don’t move.”

The Grand Duke barked the command—and stepped back even farther. Aeryl’s eyes widened. This was the first time the Grand Duke had ever stopped him from approaching. Not even when he had just manifested, and their trust hadn’t been built yet, had this happened.

“Your Grace?”

‘Why are you doing this to me?’ Aeryl was shaken.

“…”

The Grand Duke didn’t reply. He simply stared down at Aeryl’s feet. And then, Aeryl realized something important.

“Why have you been avoiding my eyes since earlier?”

Ever since he’d entered the room, the Grand Duke hadn’t looked directly at him once. That was why Aeryl had felt so unwelcome.

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. You’re doing it even now. Is something about me bothering you?”

Aeryl demanded. He knew he didn’t have the right—he was the subordinate here. The Grand Duke had no obligation to explain himself. But all the pent-up hurt came spilling out.

‘Weren’t we getting close?’

“There’s nothing about you that bothers me.”

The Grand Duke answered. Hearing from his own mouth that it wasn’t him made Aeryl feel a little better.

“Then please look at me. Meet my eyes. Properly.”

Aeryl fixed his gaze on him, demanding it. He knew he was being unreasonable, but something in him refused to back down until their eyes met.

“Aeryl…”

The Grand Duke looked troubled. With that sculpted, expressionless face finally showing emotion, he looked… beautiful.

“…Haa. You’re just as stubborn as ever.”

‘Of course! You think anyone could deceive the Emperor and run away with anything less than sheer stubbornness?’ Aeryl stared back at him with quiet intensity.

The Grand Duke sighed again, then slowly raised his downcast eyes. Long black lashes fluttered, revealing his blue irises. The color was the same—like a sky heavy with storm clouds—but something about them looked different from usual.

‘What is it?’

Aeryl stared intently into the Grand Duke’s eyes, as if trying to uncover whatever was hidden within them. At that, his pupils gave a faint tremble.

“Ah…”

He looked… pure. The word slipped from Aeryl’s lips in a whisper of awe. The moment he spoke, the Grand Duke blinked rapidly, and the moment passed—his usual expression returned.

“That should be enough to satisfy you.”

“Huh? Oh, yes.”

Pure? Did I really just think that about the Grand Duke? Aeryl replied, still dazed.

“It’s getting late. You should head back.”

“…Yes.”

The Grand Duke turned toward the window, clearly signaling he had no intention of speaking further.

“Then… rest well.”

Aeryl offered his farewell and stepped out.

“…Pure…”

The quiet murmur faded into the sound of the door clicking shut behind him.

The Grand Duke collapsed into the chair the moment the door closed. All the strength had drained from his legs—just meeting Aeryl’s gaze had taken everything out of him.

Was making eye contact always this difficult?

He had never thought so before. In fact, he used to look people in the eyes deliberately, gleaning the edges of their thoughts while showing none of his own. It was a skill honed since his days as heir. By the time he’d become Grand Duke, it was second nature.

But now, faced with Aeryl, he couldn’t even remember how he’d managed it before. Without realizing it, he’d avoided looking at him, and in the end, let himself be shaken.

‘How pathetic.’

What must Aeryl be thinking of him now?

Part of him insisted—anyone would have been shaken. Who could keep a straight face when Aeryl was acting so adorably stubborn? Unless one had no emotions at all.

“…Emotions.”

There was no point pretending anymore. He might not be able to smell his own pheromones, but he was sure they were all but screaming affection at this point. There was no denying it now.

This wasn’t instinct.

He wanted to hold him, dote on him, do everything for him. How could that be just an alpha’s instinct?

The Grand Duke knew his own nature. If this had merely been desire or obsession, he would’ve tried to mold Aeryl to fit him—not the other way around.

But he hadn’t. He wanted Aeryl to think well of him, to like him. He wouldn’t have given up anything, even superficial gains, if it meant earning his favor.

It wasn’t instinct.

This burning feeling in his chest—it could only be love.

Love…

Was there any word more foreign?

The former Grand Duke had often told him:

“You were born to be my heir. So fulfill your role.”

What he wanted was an heir who achieved greatness with humility, stood firm without showing weakness, and above all, obeyed the Grand Duke absolutely. And Hiello had poured everything into meeting that demand.

He gripped a sword until his palms bled. Studied until dawn with only books for company. He stripped himself of emotions, needs—everything.

Even after becoming Grand Duke, his life didn’t change much. His role had shifted, yes, but nothing else. Like an actor throwing himself into a part onstage, he simply continued to live for the role.

And that role was to rule the duchy.

There was no place for “Hiello” the individual in that role. His own thoughts and emotions had no value. In the pursuit of prosperity and governance, emotions were nothing but a hindrance—irrational and disruptive.

And love? That was the most irrelevant of all. He had never wanted it. Never needed it. And he still didn’t.

Which means it must be eliminated.

Just as he always had, he had to forget it. Ignore it. As Grand Duke Asirion, love would only get in the way.

He pressed a hand against the wall and stood. The cold air helped clear his mind. The face reflected faintly in the glass was not the face of a man in love—it was far too bleak.

But he still didn’t understand.

First love never follows one’s plan—and it twists one’s life down paths they never imagined.