TOPWL 189

“……?”

Yudit woke up alone in the wide bed. He lifted his back and looked around. The bed had been tidied.

“……”

How could he have fallen asleep after taking something that big. Even if he felt safe, that was too much.

He let out a breath, and ran a hand over the soft sheets. Had Khalid already left? As Yudit glanced around, he noticed the door was open. He got up to close it, but there was a dull ache below. His thighs ached too, like he’d been riding all day.

It’s going to hurt worse in the morning.

Thinking about tomorrow’s schedule, Yudit headed for the door. As he got closer, he heard low voices. Peeking through the crack, he saw Khalid speaking with two knights.

“Your Grace, please reconsider.”

“We’re begging you.”

“My mind is made up.”

“Your Grace… this is suicide. You have to think of the family–!”

Yudit’s face went pale. Suicide?

Khalid showed no reaction to the plea.

“My family has been just me for a long time now.”

“There’s still a cadet branch. Are you going to let all three hundred retainers die too?”

“Why are you so sure we’ll fail?”

“Even if we succeed, Your Grace, you’ll gain nothing. You’ll be covered in filth!”

“Lower your voice. You’ll wake him.”

“No need. I’m already awake.”

Yudit opened the door and stepped out. Khalid bit his lip, looking caught off guard. Yudit stared at him, cold.

“Just one question, Khalid.”

He took a breath. Even in a quiet voice, it was hard to say.

“Are you planning treason?”

“……”

No answer. That was his answer.

“Why would you…!”

“Wait, Yudit. I can explain.”

Khalid’s tone was both flustered and strangely calm. He gestured for the others to leave, then shut the door. After locking it, he walked to the far end of the room before speaking again.

“Technically, it’s not treason. If we win, it’s a revolution.”

“And what does Khalid gain from that revolution? Infamy? Filth?”

“You know what I stand to lose if I don’t.”

Yudit’s face hardened. The way Khalid said it made it obvious, what he’d lose was Yudit himself.

“You’re going to raise a hand against the crown for me? Why?”

“Because if you go to war, you’ll die.”

Khalid let out a breath.

“The emperor means to kill you this time. He’s already placed Reginald and Hiole at your sides. If they don’t do it, he will.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

If Khalid was saying this much, it had to be true. He looked agitated. Not like his usual composed self. In that state, he couldn’t make good decisions. Yudit felt like he already hadn’t.

“Calm down, Khalid.”

“I am calm enough.”

“No, you’re not. Be honest. You think you can start a revolution in a few days? Besides, by law, unless there are special circumstances, you can’t even bring more than five hundred soldiers into the capital.”

“I’ll find a way to sneak them in.”

“And how do you plan to sneak in enough soldiers to win a revolution? If you fail, you all die. I die and that’s it for me, but you have thousands of people depending on you.”

“So I should just go back north knowing you’ll die? Keep licking the boots of the emperor who put you in the ground?”

Khalid’s voice was sharp. Yudit looked at him quietly, then reached out and hugged him. Khalid’s chest trembled. Then he hugged Yudit back.

“Revenge after you’re dead is meaningless. What good is the throne if I’m holding your corpse?”

Khalid was set on this. Yudit could tell there was no talking him down. No wonder the soldiers were so unsettled. What was he supposed to do?

“For now, say you’re sick and delay deployment a few days. I’ll finish everything in a week.”

Khalid brushed Yudit’s shoulder, kissed his forehead, and left the room. Yudit watched his back as he walked away.

He always put Yudit first. The one Yudit loved.

He couldn’t let someone like that throw himself off a cliff for his sake. There had to be another way.

***

“Are you alright?”

Selena sat in front of Yudit and whispered.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“You seem… off. Your face doesn’t look good.”

“Does it show?”

Yudit touched his face, voice uneasy. The hall was filled with noise, a lively sendoff before deployment. No matter what he was dealing with, a commander couldn’t show it on his face. Selena shook her head.

“No. Even I, who’ve known Your Highness for a long time, only just noticed. The others probably haven’t.”

“That’s a relief.”

Yudit let out a quiet breath. He knew she was worried, but he couldn’t tell her the truth. That his lover was preparing to commit treason for his sake, how could he say that?

“I guess I’m just a little nervous before deployment.”

“You must be. If there’s anything I can do, please say so. Even if I can’t help, I can at least listen… with everything I’ve got.”

Selena clenched her fists, expression resolute. Yudit gave her a faint smile and nodded.

“If that time comes, I’ll count on you.”

“Then I’ll go check on the supplies. The wine and ale are going faster than expected. I didn’t think they’d finish so much so quickly.”

She clicked her tongue and stood up. She had pulled off an amazing banquet in such a short time. There was nothing missing, plenty of food, drink, and atmosphere. Yudit was grateful.

“……”

Then a thought hit him. He wasn’t alone. He had the Craven family. The Kinezia marquisate. If the treason failed, they’d be destroyed too. He couldn’t bring ruin to people who trusted him. It was better if he died alone.

His head was a mess. Just then, someone sat across from him. Short brown hair. Lean build. It was Bagon, one of the guards Khalid had assigned to him. Always silent, always in the background. This was the first time since they met that he’d approached Yudit directly.

Bagon looked at him for a moment, then spoke.

“Your Highness. There’s something you need to know.”

***

“Is that true?”

Yudit couldn’t hide his shock after hearing Bagon’s report in the private chamber. Bagon nodded grimly.

“Yes.”

The story was serious. Just before coming to the capital, Khalid had lost a significant number of troops during a campaign. About twenty percent, nearly 1,800 men. The enemy’s numbers and weapons had far exceeded expectations.

He won, but it was a painful loss. Preparing for the next battle with fewer soldiers was a massive blow. It takes over three years to train a soldier. Over eight to train a knight. And he had lost nearly 1,800 of them. Morale had dropped as well.

“…So that’s why there was such a big memorial service.”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

Even when time was short and he needed to reach the capital quickly, Khalid had held a large funeral. It was because the losses were so high.

“Why didn’t I know about this?”

“His Grace didn’t want you to.”

Yudit bit his lip. They were in the same place, but not together. It was like Khalid had blindfolded him in a garden of flowers. But that wasn’t what Yudit wanted. He had wanted to walk beside him, shoulder to shoulder.

“I got suspicious and kept digging. I learned that the Adenauer royal family has been supplying weapons and troops. I don’t have direct proof, but internally, it’s already confirmed.”

Crack. Yudit’s lip bled.

“The emperor.”

“…It’s not fully verified.”

But if even Bagon, who always guarded from the shadows, had come to him like this, it was as good as certain. Yudit tightly closed his eyes.