VSP 117

As the endless wait turned to impatience, Dogyeong couldn’t help but admit that Seo Sejun was the most difficult ordeal in his life.

He knew it wouldn’t be easy. Dating a man would be different from any relationship he had had before, so he knew it wouldn’t be easy, but he didn’t know it would be this hard.

No, more precisely, the problem wasn’t dating a man. The problem was that the other person was Seo Sejun.

He doesn’t hate me. He likes me. Then why did he refuse the ring? Why did he look so full of guilt? He wondered if he should give him some time, so he kept contact to a minimum and left him alone, and then the guy nearly died and scared the hell out of him.

And why are there so many men around him?

He knew it wasn’t Seo Sejun’s fault, but he was angry. He was irritated, but the target of that irritation was vague. He couldn’t pinpoint who it was directed at. Sometimes it felt like he was angry at himself, and sometimes it felt like he was irritated by the existence of Seo Sejun, who had intruded into a life where nothing had ever failed to go his way.

That feeling continued eating away at his mood without rest and eventually even produced something close to depression. In many ways, it was a first in his life.

It was honestly absurd. Cha Dogyeong had never felt depressed even when he cut ties with his family, even if he had felt bad at the time.

The fact that he was having all kinds of thoughts just because Sejun hadn’t contacted him made him feel ridiculously pathetic.

“Ha.”

Dogyeong had just let out a sigh and rubbed his dry face when it happened.

Someone pressed the intercom at Dogyeong’s house.

Dogyeong stood up mechanically and walked to the door. He didn’t even think about who it might be. He just walked over, and the moment he saw the person reflected on the intercom screen, he froze in place.

On the screen stood Sejun with an awkward expression.

•••

…Is he not home?

Even after pressing the call bell, there was no response. Sejun wandered around in front of the area visible to the lens, wondering if the camera wasn’t catching him.

“Cha Dogyeong, are you not here?”

It didn’t look like Dogyeong had checked the intercom, but since there was no answer for quite a while, Sejun pressed it again. There was no sound. Sejun didn’t know that Dogyeong had already reflexively pressed the receive button, so the alert wouldn’t ring again, and he tilted his head. What is this? Is it broken?

“Cha Dogyeong.”

It was the moment when he called Cha Dogyeong’s name again. He had a silly thought: “It’s like a child calling a friend’s name at a friend’s house.” Suddenly, the door flew open. Startled, Sejun took a couple of steps back.

As expected, the one who opened the door was Cha Dogyeong. For some reason, his face looked a little pale, and his chest was heaving.

“…Hi?”

Sejun greeted him awkwardly. He wasn’t thick skinned enough to barge into someone else’s house with a shameless grin, so he scratched the back of his head.

“….”

Dogyeong looked down at Sejun in silence. The latter couldn’t tell how to interpret that gaze, and after standing there awkwardly and hesitating for a long time, he finally opened his mouth.

“Uh… um, I was unconscious the whole time and I woke up earlier, and I thought I should say thank you, and I heard you got hurt so I was worried… no, not worried! Or was I? Anyway, I heard you got hurt because of me, so I thought I should at least see your face, and my phone got completely destroyed so I couldn’t contact you, so, um, are you okay?”

He wished he had come after roughly deciding what he was going to say, but since he just blurted out whatever came to mind, he ended up rambling without realizing it.

Damn it. This is embarrassing.

He looked exactly like someone who had rushed over as soon as he woke up because he was thinking about Cha Dogyeong. That wasn’t wrong, but Sejun was still endlessly clumsy when it came to showing his feelings, so he felt embarrassed by his own attitude.

Cha Dogyeong still showed no particular reaction. Sejun continued staring at Dogyeong’s face, which was fixed on him without a word, and as he kept avoiding Dogyeong’s gaze awkwardly, his expression gradually turned sullen.

Why is there no reaction at all? When that thought crossed his mind, Dogyeong finally spoke.

“You woke up today?”

“Y-yeah, the system says my mana was drained so I slept the whole two days.”

“And your phone was destroyed?”

“Because of Lee Yongseok, I got thrown around here and there… the system says it’s completely destroyed.”

Dogyeong let out a sigh.

“Ha.”

Sejun didn’t know what the problem was, but he looked irritated, and somehow he also looked a little embarrassed. He didn’t know why.

“Ah, seriously….”

As if he couldn’t deal with his directionless irritation, Dogyeong roughly messed up his own hair, rubbed his face, and looked at Sejun.

“Sejun-hyung.”

“Huh?”

“Hyung, you’re seriously irritating.”

But, contrary to the words that expressed his frustration, an arm immediately stretched out and hugged Sejun, and their lips immediately met.

Sejun’s eyes widened at the unexpected action as he was suddenly pulled into his arms and Dogyeong’s soft lips touched his.

Sejun obediently parted his lips, welcoming the tongue that skillfully slipped in and split them apart, and only after quite some time did he finally understand the situation.

He was kissing Cha Dogyeong.

It wasn’t something that had happened just once or twice. At the amusement park last time, they had done it so many times he couldn’t even count them. But maybe because it wasn’t an act he was fully used to yet, his cheeks heated up.

The intruder repeatedly licked and sucked Sejun’s mouth, as if he were going to devour him, before finally letting go. Before he knew it, Sejun’s cheeks were flushed and his body temperature had risen.

“Hyung.”

Sejun flinched while staring at the red lips soaked with saliva. Fuck, he’s stupidly handsome for no reason. Sejun grumbled to himself and cleared his throat awkwardly.

“…what?”

“Sejun-hyung.”

It didn’t seem like Dogyeong expected an answer. After that, Dogyeong called him hyung several more times. Watching Sejun absentmindedly respond with dazed little sounds like yeah, why, uh, he sighed and pulled Sejun into his arms again.

Sejun ended up being wrapped once more in that broad chest and panicked at the unfamiliar situation, not knowing what to do. After fumbling for a moment, he slowly wrapped his arms around Dogyeong’s back. For some reason, he felt like he needed to pat it.

Cha Dogyeong in front of him looked too unstable.

He definitely seemed down when he opened the door earlier, and saying he was irritated sounded sincere too, but the Cha Dogyeong right now seemed strangely to be in a better mood.

It doesn’t feel like a misunderstanding.

After Sejun continued patting his back with an uncertain expression for quite a while, Cha Dogyeong remained like that for a long time before slowly opening his mouth.

“Hyung, now that I think about it, I feel like there was something I should’ve said to you but didn’t.”

“What is it?”

Up until that moment, Sejun didn’t think anything particularly meaningful would come out of that mouth.

“I think I like you, hyung.”

When the completely, completely unexpected confession pierced his ears, Sejun opened his eyes wide without realizing it and froze on the spot.

Dogyeong looked at Sejun, who had stiffened up like he’d gotten frostbite, and snorted.

“Your face is red, hyung.”

“….”

“You know that? When you get even a little embarrassed, your ears turn red first.”

As if proving it, the fingers fiddling with his ear made Sejun shudder. He became keenly aware that his ears were heating up, and the inside of his mouth felt hot and dry.

“It doesn’t seem like you don’t have feelings for me at all.”

While Sejun didn’t know what to do about the sudden desert that had appeared in his mouth and only swallowed dryly, Dogyeong mumbled with a subdued expression.

“You rejected the ring like you’d rather die than accept it, so I wondered if I gave you a gift for nothing, if you didn’t have any feelings for me. I kept thinking about all sorts of things.”

“…Uh.”

He had no idea how to respond, but Sejun opened his mouth. He had never even imagined that Cha Dogyeong would be worrying like that because of him.

For Sejun, he had just refused because his conscience wouldn’t let him accept something that precious, but only then did it occur to him that from Dogyeong’s point of view, it could look like a rejection of his feelings.

Feeling like he’d done all sorts of unforgivable things, Sejun diligently avoided his eyes. Dogyeong let out a small laugh and followed up with another blow.

“Hyung, you like me, right?”

“….”

In response to those words, Sejun’s eyes went wide.

Does he like Cha Dogyeong? Of course he does. Wasn’t it because he ended up liking Cha Dogyeong that he decided to clear the mission, because he wanted to like Cha Dogyeong more openly and confidently?

As if he already knew how Sejun felt, Dogyeong leaned in without hesitation and calmly kissed Sejun’s lips, even as he avoided his gaze. Sejun’s face burned even hotter.

“You seem to like kissing too… so why are you like this? Why won’t you even say once that you like me? It doesn’t feel like it’s just because you’re shy.”

“Hey, Cha Dogyeong….”