TVDC 18: Cleanliness Obsession

It was cold at night. Under the light from the living room, Qiu Xuning could see his breath forming a faint white mist. He exhaled softly and watched the thin vapor fade into the air.

He waited until He Zhiyuan had finished changing his shoes before carefully opening the door. Zhou Mingmei and the others lived on the first floor—if their ears were sharp, they would definitely hear the sound of the door opening. He didn’t want them to find out that he and He Zhiyuan were sneaking out for a late-night meal together.

Qiu Xuning and He Zhiyuan stepped out together. Qiu Xuning tucked the keys into his chest pocket, pulled his collar up to block the cold wind sneaking down his neck, then glanced at He Zhiyuan beside him and whispered, “It’s so cold, are you cold?”

Suddenly, He Zhiyuan reached out and held Qiu Xuning’s hand.

Qiu Xuning was startled and immediately tried to pull away, but He Zhiyuan seemed to anticipate his struggle, gripping firmly. Unable to break free, Qiu Xuning stammered, “W-what are you doing?”

He Zhiyuan glanced at him and said, “I’m not cold.”

“…” Qiu Xuning froze, his attention drawn to their joined hands. Zhiyuan’s palm was much broader than his, completely enveloping his own. That solid and warm, yet refined touch made Qiu Xuning’s face slowly flush for reasons he couldn’t explain. He mumbled, “I get it, s-so let go.”

Obligingly, He Zhiyuan released him and slipped his hand into the pocket of his coat.

He hadn’t held his hand for long, but the chill lingering in Qiu Xuning’s fingers seemed to be driven away by He Zhiyuan’s warmth, leaving them suddenly much warmer. Qiu Xuning quietly slipped his hand into his pocket, his heartbeat quickening so fast it sent heat rushing to his face.

Neither of them spoke for a while. With his head lowered, Qiu Xuning noticed a small stone by the roadside. He rose slightly on his toes and kicked it, watching it bounce and roll away before dropping into a drain. After walking a few more steps, he saw a crushed yogurt drink carton tossed on the ground. He went over, bent down, picked it up, and threw it into a nearby trash bin.

He Zhiyuan watched his movements and stopped to wait for him. When Qiu Xuning turned back and saw him standing still, he lowered his voice in embarrassment and said, “You don’t have to wait for me.”

He Zhiyuan didn’t reply and only kept his eyes on him. Qiu Xuning avoided his gaze, walked up to his side, sniffled lightly, and whispered, “What do you want to eat? My treat. My sister gave me money, and I’ve saved it all without spending any.”

He Zhiyuan looked away and said, “Anything’s fine.”

Qiu Xuning pulled a wet wipe from his pocket and cleaned his fingers as he spoke. “Anything, huh? Do you eat spicy food? How about tteokbokki? Or we could get noodles instead.”

He Zhiyuan gave a soft “mm.” Qiu Xuning tilted his head back to look at him. “So do you prefer tteokbokki or noodles?”

He Zhiyuan seemed to think for a moment before pausing, then answered, “Noodles.”

Qiu Xuning drew his head back in, muttering quietly, “Then let’s have noodles. It’s late anyway, noodles are easier to digest.”

After saying that, he fell silent. After a while, he said, “We’re here.”

The night market street he spoke of was fairly large. Under the bright lights, people bustled about, and it was still lively and full of energy even at this late hour.

Following the familiar aroma in his memory, Qiu Xuning led He Zhiyuan to a small shop and ordered two bowls of beef noodles. Then he pulled out a few wet wipes and started wiping down the chairs and table.

Watching him, He Zhiyuan raised his brows slightly and asked in a low voice, “You have a cleanliness obsession?”

Qiu Xuning sniffled and quickly denied it. “No, I don’t.”

Whether He Zhiyuan believed him or not, he didn’t press further. He just watched as Qiu Xuning kept wiping with the wet tissue—once wasn’t enough, so he wiped again and again, his face almost pressed to the table to make sure no dirt remained. Only then did he straighten up.

But he still wasn’t finished. He took out a few dry tissues, unfolded them, and spread them neatly over the seat.

Once everything was done, he finally looked up at He Zhiyuan with a well-behaved expression and said, “You can sit now.”

The shop was still fairly crowded, and quite a few people cast bewildered looks at his behavior. Even He Zhiyuan, just standing by the table, drew some attention.

Ignoring the stares, He Zhiyuan kept his eyes only on Qiu Xuning’s face. When Qiu Xuning noticed he hadn’t sat down, he added softly, “It’s a bit cleaner this way.”

“Mm.” He Zhiyuan said, “It is clean.”

With that, he pulled out the chair and sat down.

All of Qiu Xuning’s fussing had, at least, filled the wait before their noodles arrived.

Even when the noodles were served, it still wasn’t enough. Qiu Xuning quietly said, “Don’t eat yet.”

He Zhiyuan glanced at him and, true to his word, didn’t move. He watched as Qiu Xuning went to the kitchen for a bowl of hot water, carefully carried it back, and placed both pairs of chopsticks into it to soak.

Qiu Xuning explained, “They’re disinfected this way.”

He Zhiyuan said nothing. He simply waited until Qiu Xuning was done and handed him the sanitized chopsticks, which he then accepted.

Holding the chopsticks between his pale and slender fingers, Qiu Xuning ate with quiet refinement, his manner almost pleasing to watch. From He Zhiyuan’s angle, he could see the thick sweep of Qiu Xuning’s lashes when his eyes were lowered, the sharp line of his nose, and how even when he ate noodles, his lips only parted slightly. It was elegant and restrained.

Like this, Qiu Xuning was undoubtedly handsome, yet also obedient-looking, the kind of peculiar child every parent would favor—the model student.

Qiu Xuning lifted his gaze toward He Zhiyuan. Seeing him bent over his noodles, he curved his lips into a faint smile and asked softly, “Is it good?”

“Mm.” He Zhiyuan didn’t look at him. He stirred the noodles a little and slowly took a bite.

The noodles were still hot, reddening Qiu Xuning’s lips. He picked up a small bundle with his chopsticks, blew on them gently, and said, “It’s so hot, aren’t you afraid of burning yourself?”

He Zhiyuan never blew on his food, he just ate it straight, which made Qiu Xuning’s own tongue tingle just watching.

“Don’t talk while eating,” He Zhiyuan said, glancing at him.

Qiu Xuning’s face flushed, and he lowered his head to quietly eat his noodles.

With his refined way of eating, Qiu Xuning was naturally slower than He Zhiyuan. By the time He Zhiyuan had finished his bowl, Qiu Xuning still had half left.

Seeing He Zhiyuan’s empty bowl, Qiu Xuning felt too embarrassed to keep eating. After a moment of hesitation, he asked, “Are you full?”

“Mm.” He Zhiyuan looked straight into his eyes. Even though Qiu Xuning met his gaze briefly only before quickly looking away, He Zhiyuan’s eyes never left him.

Qiu Xuning pinched his chopsticks, cast a reluctant glance at the noodles still in his bowl, and said, “Th-then shall we go?”

He Zhiyuan glanced at his bowl of noodles. “Finish it.”

As if sensing Qiu Xuning’s hesitation, He Zhiyuan added in a low voice, “I’ll wait for you.”

“O-oh.” Qiu Xuning answered hurriedly, his cheeks turning slightly red. He Zhiyuan’s voice was naturally pleasant, that sharp and cool timbre dropping low into something rich with a metallic magnetism—it made Qiu Xuning’s ears tingle.

Maybe he was a little voice-obsessed, Qiu Xuning thought to himself in a fluster.

Since He Zhiyuan said he would wait, Qiu Xuning went on eating. The noodles weren’t too hot anymore by now, so he abandoned some of his earlier refinement. His small lips opened a bit wider as he finished off the rest of the bowl.

Qiu Xuning ended up paying the bill himself, insisting on it before He Zhiyuan could, not letting him spend a cent. As they walked out of the noodle shop, Qiu Xuning asked, “Do you want to eat anything else?”

He Zhiyuan’s gaze lingered on the fingers Qiu Xuning had used to handle the money, his tone dropping lower. “No cleanliness obsession?”

Realizing where his eyes had fallen, Qiu Xuning gave his hands one last wipe and tossed the wet tissue into the trash bin. He mumbled, “I just like keeping things clean, that’s all.”

Qiu Xuning was the one who paid the bill. He insisted on paying and didn’t let He Zhiyuan spend a dime. As they walked out of the noodle shop, Qiu Xuning asked, “Do you want to eat anything else?”

He Zhiyuan watched him repeatedly wiping the fingers that had touched the money, his tone dropping slightly, “You don’t have a cleanliness obsession?”

Noticing He Zhiyuan watching him, Qiu Xuning gave his hands one last wipe, tossed the wet tissue into the trash can, and muttered, “I just like to keep things clean, that’s all.”

Boys with cleanliness obsessions often get called girly. Qiu Xuning had been teased by plenty of other boys before, so he was a bit reluctant to admit this little quirk of his.

He Zhiyuan didn’t say anything, which made Qiu Xuning breathe a sigh of relief. He didn’t speak again either. Watching the faint white mist appear with every breath, he sniffled and pulled his turtleneck higher, covering half of his face.

The wound on his head had mostly healed by now, and his hair had grown out quickly, covering the scar. It still hadn’t caught up with the surrounding hair, and when the wind blew, he could feel the chill. He shrank his neck, and after thinking for a while, realized he hadn’t covered his head. Pulling his warm hands out of his pockets, he put on the hood of his jacket.

“Why don’t we… Take a walk? Help with digestion,” Qiu Xuning tilted his head to glance at He Zhiyuan and said softly.

He Zhiyuan gave a quiet “Mm” and pointed in a direction. “Let’s go that way.”

It was a park over there, with few streetlights, making it look quite dim. He was a little afraid of the dark and hesitated, saying, “It’s really dark over there…”

He Zhiyuan looked down at him. “You scared?”

There was a hint of laughter in his voice. Qiu Xuning paused for a second and quickly looked up, but didn’t see any smile on He Zhiyuan’s face. He stammered, “I… I’m not scared. It’s just too dark. It’s not safe and my Mom told me not to go to places where there aren’t many people.”

As soon as he said it, Qiu Xuning felt annoyed with himself. He used to say “my Mom said” all the time, and the other boys would tease him, calling him a “mama’s boy.” Even though he liked boys, his personality wasn’t very likable, so he was often excluded by the other boys and could only talk with the girls.

He didn’t want He Zhiyuan to think he was a “mama’s boy” too. His lips moved slightly before he added, “I think what she said makes sense, because… because it really isn’t safe. There are so many news stories about stuff like this… I mean, I follow her advice because I agree with it. If I didn’t think she was right, I wouldn’t listen.”

After saying that, he felt like he was only making it worse, and a quiet sense of frustration settled over him.

He Zhiyuan looked at him, head hanging low, clearly feeling down, and a flicker of something unreadable passed through his eyes. “You’re right,” he said. “It really isn’t safe.”

Qiu Xuning was a little surprised when he heard that. He looked up at He Zhiyuan, his eyes narrowing slightly, the corners of his lips lifting into a smile that revealed a glimpse of sharp white canine teeth. Then he quickly pressed his lips together again, his smile both excited and a little shy. “Right, it’s not safe. So let’s not go that way. How about over there?”

He pointed toward the opposite direction, where the streetlights were bright. A row of food stalls was set up along the road, mostly selling grilled skewers. There were quite a few people eating, and the place was bustling.

He Zhiyuan glanced at the street, then looked down at the side of Qiu Xuning’s face. Even from the side, that fresh, cheerful smile was still visible. For some reason, the corners of He Zhiyuan’s lips also lifted slightly. He gave a soft “Mm” and said, “Let’s go.”