Vol 1 Chapter 4 – Honamdan Part 1

As he emptied the bowl filled with porridge, Woo furrowed his brow. If they were going to mix in powder, they could have at least made it less obvious. But every time the spoon reached his mouth, the bitter granules tormented his tongue. They hadn’t even tried to hide it. Likely because they knew he wouldn’t be able to refuse it anyway.

“Tea to cleanse the palate.”

Once Woo finished his meal, Yeonjin slid a teacup toward him. Ever since he had shielded her, Yeonjin had acted more gently. Though she was just an attendant at Heedowon, her gestures were usually minor. Sometimes she would bring him tea like this, or wash his blanket on nights he was haunted by nightmares.

They were small gestures, but to Woo, they carried weight.

“You don’t need to do this. Really.”

“If a servant fails to treat a guest with care, she’ll be punished.”

Yeonjin spoke as if everything she did was for her own sake. Woo couldn’t bring himself to refute her. Just like Kang Oh, Yeonjin had found her own way to deal with his refusals.

But words alone were losing their weight. The reason he hadn’t made any real effort to leave was because he no longer had the strength to do so. All he could hope for now was that Kang Oh would grow tired of him and leave Heukcheon again to resume his duels.

Remembering Kang Oh’s promise to one day find a decent place and prepare a home for him, Woo spent another day doing nothing, feeling utterly worn.

“Isn’t there anything I can do?”

Woo looked desperate as he turned to Yeonjin, who was clearing the dishes.

“Isn’t there anything I can do?” he asked again. It had already been ten days since he first began pleading with her. Yeonjin shook her head, clearly troubled.

“There’s no real shortage of help here at Heedowon. And if the Third Disciple finds out, it’ll cause a commotion.”

“I… I’m just a servant…”

Letting time slip by with nothing to do left him restless. Perhaps it was because Kang Oh remained nearby, but old memories kept surfacing. No matter how hard he tried to push them away, they crept back in. During the day, they turned to guilt. At night, they became nightmares.

He needed something he could completely devote himself to.

It was the aftermath of those two years after falling from the cliffs of Mount Qilian and lying bedridden.

There was a time when he couldn’t so much as lift a finger on his own, when he truly believed he would never walk again. It wasn’t just a matter of losing his martial arts. He had spent an unbearable stretch of time doing nothing but slipping in and out of sleep, a weight pressing down on him so heavily it defied measure. While his body was weak, the mental shock ruled over him.

During that time, the only one who ever came to see him was Yae Jinrang, who made no effort to hide his hatred. And so, quietly, Woo went mad.

He couldn’t tell past from present. Familiar voices rose again to lash out at him. He saw his mother kill his father, saw Dan Baekhun die at her hands. At first, he understood it was a hallucination. But the more it repeated, the clearer it became. The dreams grew sharper, more detailed, as if they had truly happened.

There were times when his father appeared as a vengeful ghost, gripping him by the throat. Woo would fall to the floor, gasping for air, choking out pleas for mercy.

“Get a grip!”

It wasn’t until Yae Jinrang came to check on him and slapped him across the face that he finally woke. Only then did he realize the hands around his throat had been his own. Soaked in cold sweat, he laughed for a long time. And cried.

He had been so weak-minded, so consumed by guilt, that he had defiled the dead just to escape the weight of it.

And yet, he had once dared to call himself the lord of the righteous martial world?

It was pathetic. Laughable.

That was why Woo forced himself, with everything he had, to rise from his bed. Unlike when he had first awakened and let everything go, now he crawled just to drink water on his own. Even if his trembling hands dropped the spoon a hundred times, he struggled to eat by himself.

His rehabilitation was so brutal that even Yae Jinrang, watching during the day, found himself stunned.

“You really are Seol Buyong’s son. As ruthless as they come.”

It was what he heard the moment he finally stood on both feet.

When Yae Jinrang told him to get out and return to Baekragung, he begged and said he would do anything, just to be allowed to stay in Heukcheon. That was how Dan Woo Hyo, once Lord of Baekragung, became the servant named “Woo.”

The life of someone no better than a slave was unfamiliar. But in some twisted way, it became a kind of salvation. On days when he pushed his body to the brink, he was granted a heavy, dreamless sleep. His body, no longer what it once was, ached even with the smallest movement, but he forced himself to keep moving.

To him, the pain was a way to repay even a fraction of the debt he owed the world for the life he had lived in deceit.

That was why the idle, quiet days at Heedowon felt less like rest and more like punishment. The guilt clawed at his chest, as if he had abandoned the path of atonement. Just being this close to Kang Oh felt like a sin. Accepting his kindness, while knowing he understood nothing, was as suffocating as trying to breathe underwater.

“In this place, the status of being the Third Disciple’s guest takes precedence over all else.”

“If… if I asked the Third Disciple for permission directly, would that be enough?” Woo mumbled. Yeonjin immediately understood the meaning behind his quiet words.

“You haven’t even begun using the bed properly, and now you want to start working? What are you saying…”

Seeing Woo lower his head in dejection, Yeonjin bit her lip.

“If you don’t like staying in the room, maybe you could take a walk or..”

“I… I don’t want to go outside.”

He didn’t want to be seen by anyone else. Someone like him staying close to Kang Oh would surely become a burden. It felt more comforting to imagine Kang Oh befriending a vengeful spirit than keeping him around.

“Maybe cleaning?”

Yeonjin offered something Woo could do without drawing Kang Oh’s attention. It wasn’t like he would be out in the halls. If he only swept and wiped the room, Kang Oh likely wouldn’t notice.

“I… I already cleaned it. There’s no more dust to wipe.”

Yeonjin looked around the room and let out a sigh. The corners of the windows and the edges of the furniture, places where dust usually gathered, were perfectly clean. It looked like he had torn off a piece of his blanket and wiped down the entire room with it.

She had noticed how unusually clean the room always seemed whenever she came in.

“Should I sneak in a basket of beans later? If you tell the kitchen you’re helping shell them, they’ll let you.”

“Then… please. I’d appreciate it.”

A hint of color returned to Woo’s face. Yeonjin picked up the dishes and stepped outside, already thinking of how to sneak in the beans.

As always, Woo left nothing behind. His dishes were completely clean. He ate so neatly that not a single drop of broth spilled. Normally, seeing someone eat so well should bring a sense of satisfaction, but Yeonjin felt only a growing heaviness in her chest.

That was because the porridge Woo ate today had come from Seo Mun Geumryeong.

After being assigned to keep watch over him and take care of his meals, Yeonjin began receiving small compensations. Another servant had been brought in to take over her usual duties at Heedowon, and outside of tending to Woo, she now had full control over her time. The head maid even told her she had worked long enough to deserve a promotion, but since there were no vacant management positions, they increased her pay instead.

Yeonjin could feel that the First Overseer Seo Mun Geumryeong was weaving her future as precisely as a loom clacking back and forth, warping and wefting threads into place. Everything was arranged so smoothly that no one would even have time to grow suspicious. Without ever lifting a hand, Yeonjin would be led into a life of comfort and privilege.

And yet, the empty bowl in her hands felt unbearably heavy. It was because her heart had begun to drift toward Woo. The more time she spent by his side, the more her feelings deepened.

It wasn’t as if she felt a flutter because Woo was handsome. From the start, his face had been badly wounded, scarred in a way that made it painful to look at for too long. Though now only the scars remained, it was easy to imagine how serious the original injury must have been. Because of that, there were a few servants who felt uneasy about Woo, whom the Third Disciple had brought back. Others, even if not uncomfortable, couldn’t help but feel pity.

But sympathy alone couldn’t explain the stirrings she sometimes felt. She couldn’t bring herself to tell Woo that the porridge he was eating came from the First Overseer, or that whatever was in it might well be harmful to his body.

In the end, Yeonjin had chosen to set aside a portion of the porridge on her way over. It might not have been enough to fill him, but Woo never once said he was hungry. These days, Yeonjin often went back and forth to the kitchen, searching for small snacks to bring him. Even so, Woo rarely ate more than a few bites of anything she brought him, whether it was sweet, spicy, or plain, before quietly setting it aside.

Still, it was strange that someone like him would always finish every last bite of his meal. Was it just that the First Overseer’s porridge suited his taste that well?

“You…”

Yeonjin had just turned into the corridor when she dropped to her knees. She had come face to face with the Third Disciple, Yae Kang Oh. He normally wouldn’t spare a glance for a servant, but this time he stopped and spoke. He remembered her, because Woo had once stood up for her.

“So, the guest has finished his meal.”

“Yes.”

The bowl Yeonjin carried had been emptied clean. It was a relief that Woo hadn’t skipped his meal, but Kang Oh frowned slightly at how few dishes there were.

“He’s still only eating porridge?”

“Yes, master.”

“Call for the physician again. Have him checked to see when he’ll be able to eat proper meals.”

Though Woo had some muscle left from hard labor, to Kang Oh, he still looked far too thin. There were times when Woo seemed so frail that Kang Oh couldn’t help but imagine his bones snapping from even the slightest grip.

“I will see it done.”

Yeonjin kept her head low as she felt a cold sweat run down her spine. It was just a question about whether the guest had eaten well, and yet, like a thief startled by their own guilt, she was afraid. Afraid that Kang Oh might know about the porridge, or worse, about her connection with the First Overseer.

The Third Disciple’s voice felt like a cold blade brushing over the back of her neck. She wondered if this was how condemned prisoners felt, trembling as they waited for their sentence to be carried out. She tried her best not to show the anxiety creeping up her throat.

Fortunately, Kang Oh didn’t question her further. He simply passed by, seemingly indifferent.

Still bowed to the floor, Yeonjin suppressed the trembling in her shoulders as she slowly lifted her head. She saw the hem of Kang Oh’s robe disappearing around the corridor she had come from.

She let out a quiet breath of relief and fiddled with her collar. It felt like she had stuck her head past death’s door and barely managed to pull it back.

She had stepped into this role out of desire and curiosity, agreeing to watch over Woo. But she wasn’t made of the boldness she once thought she had. At least in this game, the part she could play was far too small.

“I should bring that basket of beans,” she murmured, and hurried off.

—

“Are you inside?”

Hearing footsteps outside the door, Woo assumed it was Yeonjin returning with the basket of beans and moved to approach. But the voice that reached his ears belonged to Kang Oh.

“Y-yes.”

Caught off guard by his sudden visit, Woo replied hesitantly. The door slid open, and there he was.

He wore black robes, belted with a strip of crimson silk that somehow suited him perfectly. His broad shoulders and honed frame made the clothes hang with striking elegance. Even the loose strand of dark hair that had slipped from his tied ponytail, trailing across his pale face, added to his allure.

He had the strong, masculine appearance of a well-formed man, yet there was something about him that stirred a strange impulse in those who looked at him, something Woo couldn’t quite understand.

Flustered by the thought, Woo averted his gaze. Kang Oh, now used to Woo lowering his head every time they met, simply started speaking.

“I’m thinking of heading to Honamdan. Would you like to come with me?”

“H-Honamdan…?”

It was the shadow guard under Kang Oh’s command. From what Woo had heard, it was made up mostly of highly skilled fighters, even those from low-born families, as long as their abilities stood out.

“Why would I go there?”

“So I can introduce you.”

Kang Oh answered casually, as if it were nothing.

“It wouldn’t hurt for you to meet them. And staying cooped up in Heedowon all the time must be stifling, isn’t it?”

“I-I’m fine. If you’re worried I might feel confined, you could just send me back to the servants’ quarters instead…”

Speaking his thoughts aloud felt like dragging sand out of his throat. Kang Oh let out a quiet sigh.

“It hasn’t even been two weeks since you said you’d consider my offer. That’s a bit much, don’t you think?”

Woo lowered his head and stared silently at his feet.

“It’s fine. It’s not like a person’s heart changes so easily. I’ll just have to try harder.”

Kang Oh pushed the door open and held out his hand to Woo.

“Come on. I’ll take you there myself.”

Woo followed, but didn’t take his hand. Even though it could have been awkward, Kang Oh didn’t look particularly offended as he withdrew it. He hadn’t expected Woo to accept so easily anyway.

Satisfied that he had at least gotten him to step out of the room, Kang Oh began walking with long, steady strides.

Honamdan was based on the outskirts of Heukcheon’s central grounds. Although it was close to Heedowon, it was still a military unit, so it had to be stationed at a certain distance from the Lord’s residence. Kang Oh slowed his pace so Woo wouldn’t tire easily from his weakened legs.

“Have you ever been anywhere in Heukcheon besides the servant quarters?”

Woo thought for a moment at the mention of the Lord’s residence, then shook his head.

“Honamgak, where Honamdan is stationed, is a fairly quiet place.”

“I-is that so?”

“They’re all from fairly humble families, so people tend to avoid them. And since I’ve been spending time outside Heukcheon, even those who have business with me don’t bother coming all the way to Honamgak.”

Woo felt a slight unease. When a leader leaves his post, those beneath him often end up overlooked. Resentment was to be expected. Whether or not it would become a real problem depended on how tightly Kang Oh held control, but anyone holding a grudge could easily become a threat later on.

“Thinking about it, I figured a quiet place like that might suit you, since you don’t care much for others’ attention and prefer silence.”

Still caught up in his own worries about Kang Oh, Woo didn’t realize the comment was directed at him and gave no reply.

Watching him stay silent, Kang Oh absentmindedly touched the corner of his mouth. He knew it must have looked like he was half-forcing Woo to stay. Still, watching him show so little reaction, even when spoken to with warmth, left a faint ache in his chest.

But that was to be expected. No one opens up after just one attempt. As he had promised Woo, he would simply have to keep trying.

“Ah… you were talking to me?”

A step behind, Woo snapped out of his thoughts and asked. Kang Oh replied evenly.

“I was.”

“S-sorry…”

Woo mumbled. But Kang Oh didn’t seem the least bit offended. Instead, he looked serious as he asked,

“Is it difficult to walk this far because you haven’t fully recovered yet?”

“What?”

“No, I just thought maybe you’re still not feeling well, so your reactions were a little slow. If bringing you out is troubling you, we can go back.”

He stepped closer, as if ready to lift Woo up right then and there. Woo startled and jumped back in alarm.

“It—it’s not that! I was just curious about what kind of place Honamgak is!”

His frantic hand gestures only made it clearer how desperate he was.