YCHW Ch 54

It took over a lunar month just to get there, but the journey back was a mere four days. The gap between the two was so laughable that Yoonso let out a hollow laugh.

The beings known as Yongrin were so incredible that they could carry a large palanquin holding a single person with ease, running without a single tremor. They took turns and then took turns again, running continuously, so all Yoonso had to do was rest when told to rest, eat when told to eat, and sleep when told to sleep.

How pathetic and foolish he must have looked. Trying so desperately to escape a distance that could be covered in just four days. It had all been nothing more than a game in the palm of His Majesty the great emperor.

For four days, Hwi did not even show his face. Knowing full well that the Son of Heaven who ruled the nation had been away for a month and had no time to spare for him, and even after vowing not to hold any more expectations for him, a sense of sorrow pierced his heart like an arrow and scraped at it.

How dare he harbor such outrageous and extravagant feelings for His Majesty the emperor. Yoonso scoffed at his now-shabby heart and slowly closed and opened his eyes.

Before long, he felt the Yongrin slowing their pace. Soon, the palanquin was gently set down. When the door opened, the main house of the private residence he had so desperately wanted to escape appeared. There, the members of his household were gathered, waiting for Yoonso.

Yoonso stepped out of the palanquin impassively, his face like that of an old man who had been worn down by all the hardships of life. Nevertheless, when he spotted Yeondeok standing apart from the family, unable to keep still, a corner of the heart he had hardened so coldly seemed to collapse.

He was happy to see him again, and relieved, and sorry, and pained. A thousand emotions crossed his mind, and a sob welled up from deep inside him. But as his father, who was barely suppressing a demon-like expression, approached, he had no choice but to compose his emotions.

When they were apart, he had been worried and simply felt sorry, but now, facing him like this, he felt no particular emotion. Was it because he was an impiously unfilial son? Or was it because the ties of family had truly been severed? Yoonso clasped his hands together and bowed his head.

“Have you been well in the meantime? As your son, I can only express my regret for having caused trouble for Father and Mother.”

His father, as if unable to stand still for even a moment, just paced on the spot, then looked behind Yoonso. The presence of the Yongrin receded one by one, as if they were withdrawing.

Meanwhile, Yoonso saw the silks, furs, and gift chests stamped with the imperial seal piled high in a corner of the garden, and fiddled with the bracelet on his left arm. He wanted to take it off at once, but this was not an item bestowed by the emperor. It was given to him by his ‘Hwi.’

“Follow me inside.”

His father commanded, as if biting down on the words, and turned to enter the main house. His mother and Wongyeong followed behind him, and Yeondeok trailed cautiously after Yoonso.

“Are you in your right mind!”

The moment they entered the main room, before the door was even fully closed, a roar echoed thunderously. It was not something he had failed to anticipate, so Yoonso silently lowered his eyes. His father came right up to his face, pointing a finger at him, trembling with uncontrollable anger.

“How could you do that? How dare you, trying to ruin this family…!”

His father raised a hand as large as a pot lid. It wasn’t the first time he would be hit, so there was no reason to be particularly shocked. Yoonso silently waited for his father to vent his anger, but his father, panting raggedly, instead slapped the cheek of Yeondeok who stood behind Yoonso.

“Father!”

The force was so strong that Yeondeok collapsed sideways. Yoonso flared up, blocked Yeondeok’s front, and confronted his father with glaring eyes.

“Why do you hit an innocent child!”

“A thing like you almost ruined the entire So clan, and yet you have no shame, no shame at all. If His Majesty had not bestowed his mercy upon us, we would all be dead. Do you even understand?”

Sobaeguk clenched his fists as if he wanted to kill his son that very instant. His reddened face, with veins bulging, became hideously fierce. Yoonso bit his lip and glared back at his father, not backing down.

“When you enter the palace, you must do your utmost to ensure that the boundless grace of His Majesty the emperor descends upon our family. That is the only way for you to wash away your sins.”

He glared at Yoonso with eyes from which heat seemed to rise, then turned away. After ordering the servants to tighten security, he left with angry steps, and the room froze in a cold silence.

Once his father was gone, he could relax a little, but when his eyes met his mother’s, his fingertips flinched. His mother looked Yoonso over with a complicated expression, then sighed.

“It is a relief that you are unhurt, but… it is truly difficult to establish a single *gonwi for the family.”

She approached Yoonso, gave him a light hug, and then left.

As he trembled with an indescribable pessimism, Wongyeong’s contemptuous gaze landed on him. More painful than his father’s fiery roar, more cutting than his mother’s ambiguous indifference, that scorn tore Yoonso’s heart to shreds.

“We raised you, coddling and pampering you, only for you to end up abandoning your entire family and running away.”

“…”

“You should have just not gotten caught.”

He had thought his ties with his family were severed, that he no longer had any expectations, but it seems that was not the case. So who could he possibly blame? Yoonso pinched his fingertips, which had become red and swollen from being picked at throughout the palanquin ride, but the pain of the flesh could not overcome the agony of the heart.

Wongyeong glared at Yoonso, then left the room as if he didn’t even want to deal with him anymore. As soon as the door closed with a harsh sound, Yoonso collapsed toward the fallen Yeondeok.

“Yeondeok, are you okay? Hm?”

Yeondeok’s cheek had already swollen red. It looked like it would sting at the slightest touch, so he couldn’t do anything but fret, when Yeondeok suddenly grabbed Yoonso’s hand.

“Young Master, you are really too much.”

“Yes, I’m sorry. Because of me, you were…”

“As the saying goes, where the needle goes, the thread follows. You said you would take me with you, so how could you go alone?”

Realizing the direction of the blame, Yoonso’s fingertips flinched. In front of Yeondeok, Yoonso was a complete sinner, so he had nothing to say even if he had ten mouths. Yoonso managed to lift the corners of his mouth and held his hand back.

“I’m sorry, for leaving you behind. But to return in this state, I have no face to see you. You were always on my mind. I wondered if you were well, if you were being harmed by my father…”

“I’m so glad you’ve returned safely.”

Encountering Yeondeok’s unique, bright, and pure affection after so long, a sob threatened to burst forth, and Yoonso bit his lip hard. Yeondeok, as if cherishing him, examined Yoonso from head to toe to see if he was hurt or injured anywhere, and then smiled pitifully.

“Actually, I was hoping you wouldn’t come back.”

“…”

“That you would fly away freely and safely… just as you wished.”

Yeondeok enclosed Yoonso in his arms as if holding a small child. Yoonso, clutching Yeondeok’s clothes, trembled, and in the end, burst into tears. A sorrowful, heart-wrenching wail filled the room, and he cried so much that he felt he might drown in the sound of his own weeping.

So Yoonso, who had struggled to escape the fate that had struck him like a thunderbolt when he was just a clueless child, had finally tumbled back into his fetters. Now, there was no longer any path of escape.

𓇢𓆸

A magnificent palanquin was waiting for its master in the garden. The palanquin, adorned with reliefs of auspicious creatures like dragons and phoenixes, was hung with trailing knots and tassels, and its majesty, surrounded on all sides by men holding ceremonial flags, was enough to overwhelm the surroundings.

Yoonso stared at the palanquin with a blank expression. It felt like just yesterday that he had left the shrine and gotten into a palanquin—and it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say it was just yesterday—and yet to be making another bridal journey like this, his situation was truly ridiculous.

He bid his parents a final farewell and boarded the palanquin. This imperial litter sent from the palace was certainly larger and less shaky, yet it was unbearably uncomfortable. For some reason, his stomach churned as if he were about to be sick, and Yoonso slowly closed his eyes and exhaled a long breath.

As he tried to calm his insides, painful questions poured out like pus from a boil.

Why. Why. Why. For what reason…

Why hadn’t he told him the truth when they first met? If he had just taken him to the imperial palace then, he would not have believed or loved him, and he would not be in such torment. So why? To win the heart of the Yeongchunwha? His Majesty the emperor, who could have anything by just lifting a finger?

What tormented Yoonso most at this moment was not the fact that he had lost his freedom and was heading to the imperial palace. It was the fact that he could no longer believe in the heart of Hwi, the man he had so adored. Had his heart even existed in the first place?

He was always the one who had spoken of love. Looking back, Hwi had only ever answered in the affirmative to his questions; he had never actually said that he loved him.

Yoonso let out a hollow laugh. Hadn’t Hwi mentioned it himself, with his own lips? That the Yongrin only beg, kissing the feet of the Yeongchunwha who is the only one to feed them. And hasn’t history proven it? What the Yongrin are capable of doing to obtain a Yeongchunwha.

So what couldn’t they do? How easy would it be to simply gaze at him adoringly and offer a sweet touch?

He had struggled so desperately to escape, but in the end, he was back where he started. He was heading to the palace not as Jang Deokyoon, nor as Hwi’s ‘Yoon,’ but as a Yeongchunwha. The person Hwi wanted must have been a Yeongchunwha, not So Yoonso.